| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/10/2006 7:42:05 PM | sucks when we go thru this..and ...woman arnt the only ones.
nice to see the guys..respondin an with intellingence if i may add...to ur forum.
i make it a rule when it comes to friends...i set boundaries. #1 i dont **** my friends..period...not even a kiss.
hope this helps you....i have a best friend named mike for 10 years now...hes there for me no matter what ..as i am for him...we have fun hangin out but we have never flirted towards each other ...we keep it respectable. i fell for him a year later...then we had a good talk..he wasnt interested in me that way...i was hurt of course..but same time respected him for bein honest with me...so i had sorta took 2 weeks to myself from him to think things out...when i came to my senses...i wasnt attracted to him as a boyfriend...he was like a big brother to me..thats how i saw him...my big bro..looks out for his little sister..an trust me he does...lol...kinda cute sometimes...but its all good.
kinda miss him....we dont talk much anymore..hes seeing a woman now and hes busy gettin his life in order...an i am happy for him.
UPDATE ...as for long term...i decided its not for me...i just enjoy an intelligent conversation at times..so am goin with chat for now....i am happy an content with my life. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/11/2006 3:09:13 AM | When a woman decides she just wants to be friends, just punch her in the arm like you do your buddies, then ignore her like you do your male friends. It's always a nice touch to give her a wedgie, spit beer on her, bum smokes from her, wake her up for bail money; you know, treat her JUST LIKE ONE OF THE GUYS
 | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/11/2006 11:46:41 AM | I consider myself a good person and a good and loyal friend..If a woman wants to be friends..there is nothing wrong with that...I have several good female friends...some are married and I get along great with the hubby or boyfriend,,,
I have gotten the I want to be friends line before...we all have....it is how you look at it...Can you be man enough to accept the relationship? Or are you going to get mad and hurt? I prefer to keep the friend!
On the other hand...and this may sound mean to some of you...if a person does me wrong....lies...bad mouthing ect....I walk away and never look back! I have very few great friends...my choice...but I can walk away from anyone if I set my mind to it....Just move on and keep livin! | |
|
izz4us
|
Joined: 1/10/2006
Msg: 104 | |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/11/2006 2:00:27 PM | Hi cusack
When the girl wants to be just friends and you think your in love with her and your feeling hurt and rejected because she is not returning your affections, you are not in love at all.
You are in pain. Sometimes it seems as though were hooked: You feel obssessed or compulsive about another person. When this is the case there is a pretty good bet that on some level your're not letting her off the hook.
Your obviously obsessed and unreleased about this person. Accept her as she is. release her to be where she wants to be, doing whatever she wants to do, with whomever she wants to do it. Your ego is trying to control her which is why your feeling controlled by your emotions.
You know that you love someone when there is no insistence that they satisfy you. Stop taking her feelings about you personally feeling hurt and rejected. Forgive her and realize that forgiveness will change the way you feel, which is you will feel better, but it will not change her feelings.
Love does not have an agenda for another person. It does not demand I did this for you now you have to do this for me. This is what it means to love unconditionally. But there is no such thing as unconditional relationship. Before you get sexually involved with a person you must clarify the conditions. You wanted love but she just wanted sex. That doesn't make her wrong the only mistake you made was thinking that because you loved her or had sex with her she is now yours. Always make sure that you and the other person are on the same page before taking a step like this and don't throw her out of your life because you let your hormones take over your brain. Don't give yourself to someone who is not willing to give back and then act like you are the victim. You have a choice. The way your looking at this is causing you pain. Change your perspective and you will change how you feel. Hope this helps. Wishing you happiness. Bon | |
|
| |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/11/2006 10:10:01 PM | | For the poster putting the blame on him..That is really sad...Have you ever heard of leading somebody on..Well that is what in the hell she did...So lets get the facts straight...HE was the victim not her...If you want a 1 night stand..THEN SPILL THE BEANS...Do not play games...You see this is how people get hurt..Then again why should she care..It is not her feelings she is hurting...HE WAS THE VICTIM!!!!!...And who are you to say he is not or was in love with this girl...YOu do not have a friggin clue!! | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/11/2006 10:41:56 PM |  jrguitar23
its exactually what i do to the guys who say that to me..lol...they look at me like i am nuts..i say what..you said just friends....an nothing more..hehehe 
but lets face it guys....i hear that 24-7 from guys and thats before meetin..shesh...startin to annoy me...lol.
what happen to just two people goin out havin fun enjoyin the company an leavin it at that huh? i get tired of being alone on weekends..who doesnt...dont lie now!!! i mean i dont sit round waitin...but it would be nice to have a companion to go out an do things...instead of family an friends..lol. | |
|
| |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/12/2006 3:56:34 AM | The movie, "WHEN HARRY MET SALLY," nailed the male/female buddy issue. It's inevitable that eventually friendship evolves into a one-sided affection or infatuation, because that's just human nature to want sex. Men and women just don't possess enough common ground to be buddies without that factor. My hobbies are guns, hunting, motorcycles, all the guy stuff. I care NOTHING about anything sensitive, i.e. chick flix, shopping, fashion, etc. No common ground means no girl buddies. Of course, when you hook up with a mate, an effort is made to accommodate your partner's interests, ergo, shopping, the OCCASIONAL chick flick,(please God, no), but to make these sacrifices for a BUDDY, no...now, a F*CK BUDDY, that's entirely different. Let's face it; "I just want to be friends" ONLY WORKS FOR FEMALES. I've never told a woman I wanted to be her buddy. Here's something that no one has considered. Guys occasionally get into a situation where there's an azz-whipping involved. You know, you're in a bar, somebody mouths off, and somebody gets punched. I've never met a woman that can cover my back in a serious situation, and believe me, bike guys see a little of that occasionally. My buddies are all a little rough (like me) but BOY, they can whup a little azz in a barroom brawl!   | |
|
| |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/13/2006 7:34:40 AM | | isnt it true you can tell a person by how they treat theirs friends or their mother? i can bet he will treat you the same way. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/13/2006 12:06:06 PM | I agree with you.
Whenever a girl says they want to be "friends," there are 2 simple words one needs to use:
F*ck: easy to understand. Off: real easy to understand.
Tell them to f*cj off!
Who knows, maybe they'll come crawling back. They like ***holes. | |
|
Jaze
|
Joined: 10/8/2005
Msg: 113 | |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/15/2006 10:26:12 AM | I have just seen the following thread : "X's that just won't give up." in the forum. It's amazing, as it shows the other side of this discussion. It's not exactly the same, but shows similar features and worth checking out. Certainly initeresting to see the advice given to the guy that has an ex that won't give up. I see the ex that won't give up as the poor soul at the receiving end of "Let's be friends" line. Obviously not every situation is like that, but it is definately interesting looking at the two discussions side by side. Though I suppose you could look at it as the "lets be friends" perp as being the one that's not giving up.
Swings and roundabouts really, just depends how you see it.
Check it out, though it is scary to see what some of the posts say about the "x that just won't give up" | |
|
cusack
|
Joined: 5/30/2005
Msg: 114 | |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/15/2006 8:03:53 PM | Well since I have been sitting here for a few weeks now just sitting back and reading all of the posts on this topic I started and I haven't said anything I must say to "Tarheelman" you are absolutely right. "I" was the victim here and not her and to others who say or think differently then you know where you can go.
I tried really really hard to be this girl's friend and it wasn't my fault that I fell in love with her but when someone wants me to call her EVERY single day and come visit all the time and just be with me 24/7 then that isn't friendship, that's someone who just wanted to play games and screw with my emotions and yes I admit I was stupid for putting up for it as long as I did and I should have been more of an a$$hole and told her off but she played me like a fool and I thought it was going to lead into more than friendship because when we was together she would want to cuddle and hold hands and do stuff like that and it felt like much more than friendship so I guess I totally read into things wrong but regardless what happened happened and I have definately learned from my mistake and it won't ever happen again.
It's now been a month since I last spoke to this psycho chick and I'm starting to get over it as every day passes and I just want to thank everyone for their kinds words and sympathy who has posted on this topic and to the others who had some smart comment to say well then I hope the same thing happens to you one day. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/15/2006 8:13:30 PM | | I know where you are coming from MR.CUSACK...And i wish you luck...Personally in my case it took a toll on me to the point it has mess me up mentally..It has been 13 years and to this day it has took a toll on me...The 3 years we dealt with each other we talk on the phone about 2000 times...Many of those conversation were 7 hours long..Had sex with me...But she claimed she hardly knew me...But you know what is so ironic?I knew everything about her..I mean everthing...And do you know why?I listened to everything she had to say...But that does not matter to her....You see it is all agame to them..They could careless...But society tells me it is my fault.. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/15/2006 8:29:09 PM | I hate women & men like that. You're describing a girl that is facing
lonliness and is insecure. She's single for a very good reason - try
selfish as one. Best way to handle it is to cut ties with her and
watch her persue you. Once that's established, let her
twist in the wind and you'll gain your confidence back and
then tell her to F off. | |
|
| |
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 1/16/2006 4:53:52 PM | "I hate women & men like that. You're describing a girl that is facing
lonliness and is insecure. She's single for a very good reason - try
selfish as one. Best way to handle it is to cut ties with her and
watch her persue you. Once that's established, let her
twist in the wind and you'll gain your confidence back and
then tell her to F off." lol. A bit harsh but certainly better than continueing to pursue her. I would only use this if the girl led me on or played games with me. If she told me upfront I would respect that and just never speak with her again but I wouldn't bad mouth her. If she played games though I would most certainly tell her off. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 1:10:33 PM | | I feel for you but she told you from the get go that she just wanted to be friends..Possibly she was seeing this guy at that time....I know its hard but move on, that special someone may be aroud the corner if you give her a chance...And, we always want someone we cannot have, seems to be human nature.Time heals most wounds so I say good luck to you...But try a free yourself up enough that if you meet another woman, you can see her and not pine over this one...Could be THE ONE!! | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 2:35:58 PM | | Honesty is always best be strait forward with her and tell her that you are happy to still be here friend but you are not sticking around to be used by her whiles she plays on your feelings for her. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 2:40:08 PM | | Thats real grown up. I recently seperated with my boyfriend of two years and before that we were best friends for almost 5 years. Things were not working for the both of us, but we still, now remain best friends. Its like nothing changed from us being friends. Good friends are hard to find and worth holding on to. And just so you know not all women like ***holes and I feel sorry for the ones who do. Most men I know are always the ones who crawl back crying and blubbering like babies. Just some personal imput I guess. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 2:41:44 PM | | Nice I am happy you can see it that way because after my break up it went that way and neither of us have been happier, just being best friends again | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 3:07:56 PM | It truly amazes me how much precious time people waste on
wanting to be with someone, who isn't interested in them.
Get your ego in check, and find someone who is deserving of you. | |
|
| When the girl wants to be JUST FRIENDS
Posted: 3/27/2006 3:22:54 PM | | Yes i agree with you 100% , but why dont they say it like it is its not just friends , i think its a polite why to say they want to play ya!! an hey i got plenty of friends is my out look on this , so why waste my tiime an hers? | |
|
| |
Home
login 
let me at them ....lol.
