| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 2/22/2008 3:53:21 PM | Cheating- can you forgive?
Accept back second goods, No Never! A dog will always go back to its own vomit.
Lost trust, You will never trust them again, ever. I have a one of those tree shedder's on the back of the fishing boat if you want to remove the problem for ever. Wash it down with a bilge pump
Love is absolute and forever! Never doubting, never wavering, and never wanting!
I love to love.  | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/10/2008 7:49:26 PM | | I'm so sorry that happened to you. I cheeted on my ex I would never ever do that to a man ever again. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/10/2008 8:13:26 PM |
Cocytus...... I am not bitter....I was married for most of my life since age 18 and have been a widow now for almost 18 years....I know in my heart and soul that "My Husband" never cheated on me!!!!! Thank you very much!!!!!!!
yes, one man,,,,,,cheated on me...that was someone from last year! He is the loser...not me!
And, these icons are here to use.......
Bitter???? Me?????? I am in no way bitter....just wiser!!!
I have a lot of self-respect and I expect "respect" from others because I deserve it!!!
Umm...so you "know" for a fact that your late husband NEVER cheated on you?
How, exactly would you be able to "know" this?
Wouldn't a more accurate statement be that you "believe that he didn't?"
And I guess that the "relationship" w/ the man from last year wasn't too important.
If he cheated on you and that fact ended the relationship...then things weren't that significant I guess.
Why is he a "loser?"
Apparently you were unable to meet all of his needs...and he went looking elsewhere.
You caught him...or he confessed...and then the two of you parted ways.
And this makes him a "loser".....how,again?
Finally...yes the icons are here to use.
But are you unable to to clearly and concisely make your points w/o using so many of them?
You know that is one of the worst things I've seen someone say to someone else.
Umm...so you "know" for a fact that your late husband NEVER cheated on you?
How, exactly would you be able to "know" this?
YOU sound like the bitter one. Did that give you pleasure trying to hurt this person? Because that's all you were trying to do, and probably did, but I hope not.
He's a loser because he's a cheater, but maybe not in your book.
Are you the icon police. What nerve, and what an awful person you are. And no, I don't know you, but I can read!!!!!!!!!!!
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/10/2008 11:24:41 PM | | No. If my girl kissed another guy delibirately, I can forgive that, but if she has sex with anyone, that's it. No goin back. That is my territory and if she wants to give it to someone else, there is no return or forgiveness for it. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/11/2008 12:19:38 AM | Many, many, many moons ago I did forgive someone, in my teens.
I'm a very forgiving soul.
But never have forgotten and probably never will.
Since then, the one other time I was asked for forgiveness, bye bye - alcohol is no excuse. And repeatedly asking for forgiveness will accomplish nothing.  | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 12:58:09 PM | | No, never, won't happen, 1st time and I'm gone. I may still love you but I'll get over it. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:08:23 PM | | No. If i do forgive, it will take a hell of a lot fo time, but on the other hand, i will never forget. No matter how much I love you, the relationship will never work out because i will not be able to trust you again. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 1:27:33 PM | | EVERYONE does not cheat. Please don't put everyone in that catagory. I never cheated on a bf. Had one that cheated on me...what an awful feeling. I would never make someone feel like a piece of dirt like that. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 2:25:02 PM | No way, not a chance.
The trust would be all gone and everytime she's not around, I'll be wondering where and who she is with.
It's better left alone,IMO. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 3:39:44 PM | Once the trust is broken once then it is gone for good.
Love means total loyalty.
If they arent loyal then they dont love you......... | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 6:00:36 PM | Sounds like you're defending cheating Coytus and why would you insult a widow and her husband who passed away by conjecturing that he might have cheated? What's your point in that particular tact?
There is no defense for cheating and no rationalization that justifies it. If you don't want to be in a relationship you should move on and spare the other person the agony of having to deal with the betrayal. If you're missing something in a relationship you want to remain in... say something about it. The person who was betrayed is not somehow made to be a bigger person by consistently or contiually allowing another to cheat without taking a stand for their own self respect and dignity in the situation.
Is there a high probability the person will cheat again? Yes. Do cheaters constantly project the blame on others? Persistently rationalize that their behavior is excusable? Yes. Can you forgive a cheater? Sure. Do you have to stay with them? No. | |
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jtm216
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Joined: 7/16/2007
Msg: 1040 | |
| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 6:05:40 PM | | The ball is in your court! The BIBLE even said that is your only excuse to remove from the relationship. I say kick the dust off your feet and move on. What goes around comes back around. Whatever that might be, I would be out of the way or it might hit you! Move on 4 real! Good luck! | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 6:25:56 PM | | Been there ... did more than my share of forgiving ... don't know how I survived it for as long as I did but certainly don't want to go back there again. I'm at a 0 tolerance level now. If it happens, I'm gone ... not waiting around for the apology & empty promises that it will never happen again. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 6:40:46 PM | NOPE! I CAN'T ACCEPT ANY APOLOGY AT ALL ... SO WHY WOULD I FORGIVE AND FORGET! ... NO WAYYY!!!...    | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/14/2008 6:55:15 PM | The truth about cheating... is one word... "trust"
Definitions of trust on the Web:
* have confidence or faith in
* allow without fear
* hope: expect and wish
You asked can you really work through something this big? Well let me ask... will you ever look at the past the same? Do we need all the dreadful details to make our decision or face the truth? In my honest opinion "no" we do not need to know the whole truth to make decisions - effectively, when someone has cheated on you - love yourself enough to cut your losses and walk away. Yes you can forgive but you will never forget... I mean why have half a relationship?
The bottom line cheating is never the answer. It is for the weak and the weak - minded. It is easy way out and only leaves broken hearts and disillusioned mates behind. The bottom line... if you are unhappy in a relationship, bored or even scared... open your mouth, speak the truth, show some respect for your partner and yourself and walk away.
Oh and a bit on trusting someone "new"
I believe you have to go into every relationship and extend the trust, no matter the risk. The mistake would be in not trusting.
“We're never so vulnerable than when we trust someone - but paradoxically, if we cannot trust, neither can we find love or joy” ~Walter Anderson
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/15/2008 11:36:11 AM | | Guess I gotta make sure I keep the pantry stocked so my man can have food.........lol. I hear from lots of men on this forum and elsewhere that their wives are not longer interested in the bedroom activities ( that only after the marriage, kids, house, padlock, etc..).......I guess they must be off elsewhere doing something (?) so they are not here defending cheating.............cause in that case.......what's a guy to do???...... | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/15/2008 1:35:45 PM | | Personally I dont think I could forgive cheating. I expect faithfulness and give it. Once trust is lost I wouldnt be able to get it back. My folks on the other hand survived infidelity and are still going strong after 50 years. They were willing to work past the cheating, while I wouldnt bother. Thats the diff. | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/15/2008 6:37:36 PM | nope once a greedy stupid rat, will always be. anywho if someone cheats just shows they lack intelligence, and dont know how to love, nor be satisfied. cheaters should be alone, until they get theropy, and learn how to not be a half wit. whoooppp
no reason to cheat, you want to kiss or whatever with someone else have a brain, and tell your partner that, and dont even try to get a open relationship fooolss wwahwahawhwhahawhawhwahawhwahwah | |
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Debi00
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Joined: 2/18/2008
Msg: 1049 | |
| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/15/2008 7:14:44 PM | More important "can you trust him again after being cheated on"?
For me, "NO" !! | |
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| Cheating- can you forgive?
Posted: 3/15/2008 7:49:42 PM | No Way!! That's a clue that the relationship is failing in some way. I could forgive the cheater, but I could not continue to be with him. There would always be that issue of broken trust....and TRUST is such a hard thing to obtain. Once it's broken, it remains handicapped. If he has cheated, move on....this is a clue to you that he is not the one!! | |
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