| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/14/2008 8:23:24 AM | There's almost no point to me even saying anything here because it's been said 1,000 times over already, but all I will say is get away from him before he breaks you down and you're a mess for the rest of your life. As for the weight, that's your call.
God Bless | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 4:12:44 AM | | bottom line is ,never mind these people saying ,sweetie dont worry if he realy loved you ...blah ,blah ...do you want to be a lard ass all your life! i take it your an american as your a fat nation who dine on burgers and other shit food like muck...donnalds always remember little pickers wear bigger knickers!my motto is (one can never be to thin or rich )remember that when your chokin an ur lard ass deep fried saturated dead bit of some animal ,,ok sweetie ,i guessed u must be an american as its all talk like ,kick him to the curb ! and girlfriend !eat ice cubes you will soon be thin !i hope thats helpfull honey pie xxxxxxx | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 7:47:12 AM | Tell him he can fix the weight problem it will only cost $16,000 for a lap band hope he has lots of money or really good credit.
And another 4-5 thousand for the new wardrobe. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 7:58:31 AM | grrrrrrr  this post has got me fuming!!!!!! How dare another person feel they have the right to put someone else down like that! DUMP him ASAP
the excess baggage you are carrying is him  use this knife and fork to cut his bollocks off 
take care girlie and if your gonna lose weight then do it for yourself, no-one else.x | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 9:13:07 AM | Debeers is nothing but a troll and is only making comments like this to make waves. I have no doubt in my mind that he is a 455 pound man who still lives in his mommies basement surrounded by all his star wars actions figures and a collection of over 2000 superhero comic books. By all means pay no attention to him.
I see the op is no longer here, but women face this issue all the time so I will speak to all other women facing the same issue. First of all he knew you were big when he met you so if he accepted you enough to chase then it's ridiculous for him to expect you to lose the weight now. By all means ladies get that full length mirror another poster talked about but stand in it and learn to love yourself as you are right now. Love every single part of yourself. Don't ever stop doing this also. Learn to be comfortable with your naked body and all it's flaws.
If someone wants to lose weight then by all means do so , but don't feel it is necessary unless you doctor tells you so. Studies prove that for a woman a little extra weight in the tummy,hips and thighs is actually healthy for a woman. Now I am not talking about 80 extra pounds in that area but more like 15 to 2o pounds. Also the magic number of waist size for a woman to indicate good health is 34 inches and under. You can be a plus sized lady and still be healthy. Being overweight does not automatically indicate that you are sick and unhealthy. That's just what popular culture would like you to believe. No I am not saying morbid obesity is healthy , but a little extra chub is fine. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 10:56:07 AM | | If he didn't find you attractive right at the start, why on earth did he get involved with you? It doesn't make any sense to me. But people are always trying to change other people. Why?? CONTROL. On the other hand, try to lose the weight because it will make YOU feel better, you will be healthier and have good self esteem. But don't do it for him. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 12:11:44 PM | You should never have a guy tell you things like that, ever. It is abuse. I coped by packing my shit up and leaving, it took me a minute or two to do so because I was afraid to do it there were some other shady things.. if you will... going on in one of my previous relationships but yes, a guy should never say things. He can politely ask if he cares about you but this guy seems to not give a shit. **** him and **** the shit that spews from his mouth you don't need him.
Leave him plain and simple. You can lose weight on your own without him and once you do you can find someone that appreciates you weather you are big small thick thin crazy sane or anything else you can think of. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 1:19:16 PM | | Do yourself a favor and lose some weight for your own good. Do not let your feelings about how he approached you about it affect you one way or the other. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 1:48:36 PM | Lose weight because it is healthy to do so not because your boyfriend wants you to. I once dated a fellow who thought I was big. I wore a size eight at the time and am five feet one inch tall so I looked pretty good. I got tired of hearing this from him . So I made him a deal. He was five feet six inches tall. I told him that if he grew two inches I would lose ten pounds. He never spoke of it again. I also was once interviewed by a fellow who wanted to know what my weight was because he wanted to date only thin women. So I asked him about the size of his penis. I told him I only wanted to date men with big penises. he could not handle that. My point here is a persons dimensions are not a criteria for loving. I think your boyfriend is behaving like a jerk to you. His behaviour is not loving it is insensitive, disrespectful and uncaring and is bordering on abuse. There are a lot of wonderful loving men out there. Put him back in the pond and go fishing. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 2:09:49 PM | First- Break the relationship.
Second- Try to lose the weight carefullly and healthy minded...you'll feel better
Third- After the weight loss and the New You emerges.... pass him in a store ,
cordially shake your buttocks, (cute as it is) as you walk away from him..
letting him get a good look at the New You............
Fourth- Get around the next corner, out of sight...... and smile and grin real big.
Fifth- Feel Good ... the rest of the day, maybe into the next.
Good Luck Lady! | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 2:10:57 PM | why are you still with this man,he sounds like a control freak.you say you were bigger when you met him,so he liked then.so why should he want to change you now.get this man dumped,and move on.you find mr right eventually,and if it takes time,so be it,just remember to have fun along the way. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 5:28:40 PM | | You will forever feel this pressure with him. I am a big girl as well. My ex accepted me as I was but then was more subtle than your other half that maybe I should lose a few pounds. I found that very hurtful. I did get into weight lifting and lost several pounds and became very fit at one point. He was never someone overweight by a lot but could have lost a few pounds himself for health reasons but I put so much pressure on myself that whenever I started to gain weight I felt awful. I tried and tried and couldn't keep it off and his constant eating of junk food in front of me didn't help. His reply was always....you're the one on the diet so why should I do without. I'm 49 years old now and married and divorced three times to men who were not very sensitive to my weight. Two of my ex's have since hit the middle age spread themselves and the latest now has a girlfriend 10 years younger than him and he's the one losing weight to keep up with her. Do you really want to put yourself through all that. Dump him and move on...you'll just be constantly putting that pressure on yourself. If you want to lose weight then do it for yourself and no one else. Do it for your health. I'm new to this site so I put on there "a few extra pounds" and I have promised myself to be honest with anyone who contacts me. I don't want to put myself into another relationship based on my size at the time because I know from my past I can put it on quickly and the older you get the harder it is to take it off and keep it off. You are a person, you are beautiful inside and out no matter what someone else says. He is abusing you...don't take it...get out now!!! | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 6:33:56 PM | | He may or may not have been "abusing" you. He may have been trying to do you a favor by shocking you into losing weight. One thing is for certain, you are abusing your body by being obese, so lose weight! | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 7:25:35 PM | I never had a weight problem UNTIL I hit mid forties and was put on medication for arthritis. I had two worn out arthritic hips that needed replaced. I toughed it out for 15 years-in pain, depressed, and overweight because I couldn't move or have an activity level like I previously had. People were rude to me and told me to my face that I was fat, ugly, and repulsive. I had people to tell me that I needed to quit eating. Obviously, not everyone has weight problems that are related to food. Mine was medication and side effects. People need to put their brains in gear before they put their mouths in motion.
One of these "charming" people who was continually disrepectful was a guy that I dated. Long story short, I had both hips replaced, regained my life and activity level, lost almost 90 pounds and have kept it off. All of the superficial people that had no time for me have started to come around. I have point blank told them that if they didn't have time for me before, then I certainly don't have time for them now and to go away henceforth and forever more.
Girl, you need to dump him. Tell him to "hit the trail". You are better off at home without the verbal abuse and the deplorable treatment that you are tolerating. Under no circumstances do you have to put up with that BS!!!!!!!!!!!!!! There is someone out there who will appreciate you for you! Without all of the superficial guidelines that society has deemed as necessary criteria for dating or courtship.
No one deserves to be talked to or treated like an inferior life form because of extra weight. Period. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 7:47:13 PM | Here's a good speck of inspiration. Excersize (of course) and lose the weight. Every time you excersize think about his sorry ass (get mad) and after you have "lost the weight" lose HIM!
My dear, you SHOULD care. You should be proud of who you are, and if he is not proud, he is simply not the one for you. You should be healthy, whatever weight you are.
My advise: J U S T L E A V E
He doesn't deserve you. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 8:22:20 PM | Hey...
I've been in a similar situation. Losing the weight is actually harder when you are unhappy and worrying about your bf isn't helping. My ex said he loved me and cared for me but just wasn't "attracted" because of my size and there was little, if any intimacy. Due to my insecurity (and belief that I'd be alone forever) I clung to the relationship. Eventually I couldn't stand it any more and ended it. Do you want to know something? By just being happy and not having to deal with him, 30lbs melted right off. Get rid of him, he doesn't appreciate who you are because he really isn't looking at you. He's looking at your shape. Get healthy for yourself and when you start losing the weight, calculate how many pounds you've lost and go to the grocery store. Go to the dairy aisle. For every pound you've lost, put one brick of butter into your basket. Lift it and celebrate that accomplishment instead of dwelling on a guy who is so preoccupied with himself and his own image, he can't see that he is deflating you and causing you pain. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/16/2008 10:06:32 PM | Run, run fast and do not look back.
Insensitive is the nicest word you could use about this man. I can think of a million other adjectives to describe him, but would get myself banned.
I have been up and down on the scales since my mid-20's. Whether, I wear a size 10 or size 18, I know I am sexy and curvy and beautiful. I expect the man in my life to feel the same way. If they don't, there is the door!
Be well, M | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/20/2008 6:27:37 PM | | debeers is a total cretin and a lurker who sounds like a loser. Keep posting things like you did here and you'll never find a single person that could tolerate you. As for your weight sweetheart, if you want to lose pounds do it for yourself, not for anyone else. But never tolerate abuse from someone else, whatever form or fashion they choose to dish it out. I did for far too long from someone and almost lost who I am inside. Know your self worth and always cherish that. Don't take his abuse and let him know you will not tolerate it. Once you get on with your life without that mental baggage of him trying to bring you down, your self-confidence will grow and so will you sense of self esteem. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/20/2008 10:32:09 PM | | dump him, plain and simple, dump him. How can you not see he doesnt love you for the person you are, why did he date you in the first place if you wernt thin enough for him? Sounds like a control freak to me, dump him!!! | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/20/2008 10:51:56 PM | 1) He's telling the truth. Women are asking men to be truthful - here he is.
2) What do YOU want?
3) If you want to keep him, you have to lose weight. Therefore, you have to make it a priority.
4) If you put together a serious, good PLAN, not something dreamy, but a cold, hard, schedule - dates, times, costs, start date - and then tell him exactly what you want/need him to do, I bet he'll help. He's a guy and a plan impresses us.
If you don't work this out in the next two weeks, break up, you're wasting your time. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/21/2008 1:54:40 AM | | ^^^ Actually he chased her when she was big so he doesn't get to complain about it now. He knew all about her size before they every got together so if he didn't like her size now ,which she was when they met, then he does not get to complain about it now. That would be like me chasing after and then getting together with a bald guy then insisting he start wearing toupees. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/21/2008 11:24:45 AM | I agree with most everyone on this thread - DUMP HIM. As far as losing weight is concerned, you need to remember you didn't put the weight on overnight, and it's not coming off overnight either. I'd like to offer this advice from experience: when I started my soulmate journey, it began at my doctor's office. In December of 2007, when I had my physical, I weigt 330pounds. My doctor basically said, lose it or die. So, he gave me a prescription for Meridia(appetite suppressant-works VERY well) and he hooked my up with a dietician at the local hospital, who gave me a copy of the Canada Food Guide and told me, healthy weight loss for me would be eating 2000-2400 calories per day. She said, write down what you eat. Which I did and now, in October 2008 I weigh 274 pounds. I haven't been on the Meridia since July of this year because it is quite expensive. Even though I'm not taking it, I'm still losing weight; not as fast but it is a loss nevertheless. The trick is to STAY AWAY FROM DIETING/YO-YO FADS and diet books. Record everything you eat and when you see it written down, you know you have to eat more protein/less carbs, whatever. Check out www.fitday.com for a very helpful calorie counting/weight loss plan. I use it every day, it's free and it WORKS.
2milk servings/2meat servings/6-8grain servings/8-12fruit servings per day is a good place to start. Getting moderate exercise, still eating what you want, but controling the amount is key.(drink lots of water) The best thing for you to do is distance yourself from this jerk. If he really cared about you, he'd respect your feelings. To him, your nothing more than a bootycall, and you DESERVE BETTER. | |
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| My Weight and My Boyfriend
Posted: 10/21/2008 8:04:06 PM | | What concerns me the most is that people are disregarding that these events played out in the distant past and all players are long gone. | |
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