Hal54
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Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 126 | |
| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/29/2008 9:36:16 AM | Having had met a few women based on their pics, (and a good matching profile),I'd have to say NO one looks like their pictures! Unless you are extremely photogenic, and the picture is a close up using a high mega pixel camera, you'll never get the real "picture" .....lol! Most pics on here are small and poor quality!
A pic for me now is only a very rough guidle line.
I recently sent a message to a nice looking lady that sent me a reply back and knew who I was! She was my ex-sister-in-law and I just laughed when she asked why I didn't recognize her. (Their was something familiar about her tho.....lol!)....and for the record, I had just seen her a few months ago. The pic did not reveal her true looks!
You'll never get a clear idea of the skin tone. There are many 'faults' (for lack of a better term), that camera angles ,lighting, brightness etc, hide. Wrinkles, freckles and such can all hide behind a poor quality pic. A 56 year old lady (with private pics) sent me an note with her pic and wow! There was no way to age her beyond 35 and even that was stretching it. Was is deceptive? I met her, and sure enough, even tho that was 'her', she looked like a woman in her 50's. Still very attractive, and she swore that pic was only a few years old, but damn! A professionally taken picture can make a beauty out of a mole and make an older woman look much younger!
I get told all the time I'm way better looking in person than the pics. (lousy sales pitch, I know, lol!) but it really is a two way street. For me, it's now just a very rough guide. I' met someone once that looked like a knock out but in person was extremely average (my opinion).
So I'm never attracted to someone on- line STRICTLY based on pics and anyone who does that is setting themselves up for disappointment.
It doesn't always have to be an outright deception. It's only natural to put up the best pictorial 'version' of yourself and we all have those pics.
I also find nothing wrong with an older pic up alongside a current one. It's good to see where they've come from to get an idea of where they are going!
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/29/2008 11:06:32 AM | Also another thing, I have had occasions where the lady I was talking to initially didn't have any pic of herself at all, and that went on for a good year, when I was just talking to her over the msn. I didn't know what she looked like, and then when I asked her for a pic, she gave me a ten year old pic, but that didn't bother me. I mean sure it's nice to see an up-to-date pic, infact that is preferred, OR if you have an old one up, it's nice to have a ore up-to-date one up also. But I didn't let that bother me to the point where I was just flat out disgusted and to the point that I would just stop talking to her. I mean that would be silly. She eventually showed a more up to date one and it's all good. I don't let those types of things turn me off. NOW if she sent me a pic of someone that is not her at all, then thats different. But I just think as long as you have an idea of what the person looks like, if you can look beyond the looks and be willing to get to know the persons character, I think as long as you have some idea of what they look like, that should be enough for you. It is for me.
The guilty people that do judge others like this, will obviously have a different viewpoint, and it's natural to just try to justify it, especially if it is over selfish reasons. But just so the truth be known, I think real mature people will not make too much of a fuss and whine over pics that are a few years older then THEY would have liked them to be.
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/29/2008 1:12:05 PM | As scary and silly as some of mine are, they are all from within the past 9 months...so no surprises here, take it or leave it. People who need to post ancient, wrong people, and those from 50 lbs. ago are quite pathetic individuals.  | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/29/2008 1:16:39 PM |
The guilty people that do judge others like this, will obviously have a different viewpoint,
So I'm "guilty" now...of what??? You don't make much sense really and your pictures are actually very disoriented....hmmmm....
Well for those of us who don't mind saying a recent picture is REQUIRED - for me it's before I even talk to you - I guess we're all guilty as charged. I'm so sorry if I offend anyone who doesn't want to show me a pic but I don't want to start talking to someone and then have to say - sorry didn't like your picture. You can send a private picture with an e-mail for those of you who don't want to be posted. If I show up and you look nothing like your picture, I'll be polite and stay for a coffee or drink but I'll be more than a little annoyed with being deceived. Get real people this is a DATING site. You have to be attracted to want to DATE!!  | |
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| Why all the pics in the front seat?
Posted: 4/30/2008 9:47:43 AM | | Why do so many women have pictures taken while sitting in the front seat of their car? Is this to prove they have a car? Does the shoulder belt improve their bust line? What's the deal? And where do you put the camera so you don't have to hold it? | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/30/2008 10:35:25 AM | So I'm "guilty" now...of what??? You don't make much sense really and your pictures are actually very disoriented....hmmmm....
"Guilty" meaning those that I was referring to, or those in question, to be more exact.
Well say what you want about my pics, I have them up that way, it is what it is. It's me in all of them, with a slight weight fluctuation in some of them perhapes lol, I am in all of them. You pics look nice by the way. But in two of them I can bearly see you, you have your head turned. Anyways thats beside the point lol. Peace ok. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/30/2008 2:33:16 PM | Touche Hal54
I've met a few guys in the weeks i've joined up but rarely has their picture been a good potrayal. On the other hand all the guy's I've met have said I look better than my pic ... (I have lost 15lbs in past month though, which my account for that) 
Obviously need to update pics, but not that easy for me!!
The point I'm making here that I'm trying to use the pics as a rough guide as was suggested. It can not be 100% accurate for all the reasons Hal54 has given.
The problems only occur if expectations dictate love at first sight in which case one is most likely to begin the date with air of disappointment.
Incidentally, I emailed one charmer who thanked me for my interest but said he isn't interested in BBW! (I had to ask him what that was, never heard the term!) Now call me sensitive, but I was bloody insulted by his perception of my photos. I'm not thin by any stretch of imagination, but don't think look that big either.  | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/30/2008 2:44:38 PM | | That is why I post a current picture, perhaps not the best to ever have been taken of me, but current none the less. They will either find me interesting or not, the choice is theirs. Some will find me interesting and others will just cruise on by with out a second thought; however, its there and most importantly it is me. | |
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jf468
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Joined: 12/4/2007
Msg: 135 | |
| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/30/2008 3:37:13 PM | | Unless a man looks completely different in his pics than he does in person ( such as being 50 lbs heavier or having a lot less hair ), then I wouldn't make a big deal about his pics. Very few people look exactly like their pics. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 4/30/2008 11:26:23 PM |
Why do people post pictures of their animals? I'm not looking to date your dog!
Hey now! | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/1/2008 7:16:45 PM | | all my photos are from 2008--with the exception of the full body shot that shows my wheelchair (it is from last summer). it's funny, i post the shot of my wheelchair so i can be as apparent as possible, yet people still miss it!! what is a girl to do?? smiling... | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/2/2008 11:23:28 AM | | well It sometimes seems that some men want to believe you are thinner than you are. You can clearly have full lenght unaltered photo's and somehow will think you are smaller I always state that I am plump and my pics are recent I think they just can't accept the reality of women's bodies men seemed reprogrammed by society that plumper ladies are somehow not as attractive. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/3/2008 8:07:29 AM | Its very important to have current pictures of yourself..... I look just like my pic and do update them....  ..... We are fishing people and the pic is the bait............ If you catch one you don't like ............. Throw it back ............ 
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/5/2008 3:27:30 AM | Since I have gained 15 pounds and cut my hair since my last photos (which were less than a year old) I decided that I needed new pictures - especially if I was going to meet anyone who saw my pictures. The whole process took about two hours.
Since both of my digital cameras were broken I went to CVS and bought the cheapest disposable camera they had...$7.00. Then I got my friend to take some pictures. I got four different outfits ready and we did a photo shoot. We had some wine, music and it was fun. I went to Walmart and had them make a disk of the shoot in an hour...$5.00. When I got home I cropped and edited the pictures and changed them. In a matter of minutes I got e-mails from people I correspond with as well as people who must visit my profile who said they liked my new pictures.
I suppose there wasn't that much of a difference but at least now I feel confident about going to meet someone knowing that my pictures are a pretty good representation of me. Who needs anymore rejection?! | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/5/2008 4:56:39 AM | hi there shug just read your post on missleading pics and i think you should be insulted by the remarks you dont look anything like a bbw in fact forgive me for being forward but i think you look pretty damn good just nice and pretty too maybe what he meant was that perception of slim nowadays is anorexic i guess some people are just ok if that his opinion thats fine but there is a way to say things like that without hurtig peoples feelings it is of course possible that he saw your pic and realised you were far too nice for him and disguised it with the remark he made you shoulgnt feel down about it you fine as you are shug and i for one wouldnt mind finding out if you do look better than your pic ha ha take care babe andy xx  | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/7/2008 6:42:00 PM | I really don't understand why people do this...
Post old pictures of themselves or I have even heard of people posting pictures that aren't even them. Or lying about body type, age...ect.
The fact of the matter is that if you meet someone that has contacted you on this site then then they are going to know those pictures are not you or not recent. They are going to see what you look like when they meet you. If you are truly interested in finding someone for a relationship then it is in your best interest to be an honest as possible.
Truthfully, I have not been on many dates from this site but I have to say that about 90% of the men I have met look nothing like the pictures they have posted. I have also had men email me saying they have lied about their age in their profile so they are able to contact younger women with age restrictions on their mail settings. Thanks for the honesty? And it isn't really so much an attraction thing that puts me off but more a deception issue.
The pictures I have posted are over the course of the past year. My main picture was taken a few weeks ago. I have been told I look exactly like my pictures. Ofcourse I do. I am not looking to deceive anyone. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/7/2008 8:19:25 PM | | yes there are some men who only have two categories of women-- either stick figures or bbw. that is likely why the guy thought the girl above was bbw, even though her pic looks skinny from here. i'm not entirely sure how many men think like this but i would say over half. you either meet the stick figure requirement or you are just tooooooooo big, no matter how small you are or how you carry your body or anything. just fyi. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/8/2008 2:00:06 PM | | alot of bait N switch online. Better to be rejected for your gut than to suffer the humiliation of lying about your weight THEN be rejected for your gut . I have shown all my chubbiness in my pix, if guys don't like it too bad, I'll just have anothert jelly donut! | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/8/2008 3:43:45 PM |
Everybody realizes that the real person won't look like the pic, but when there's a vast difference... it leads to disappointment. People try to say that they don't go on a second date because they judge the person to be "deceiving".... give me a break! They are just not attracted to the "new" person, feel a little shallow going for looks, which they shouldn't, and instead of realizing this blame the "deceiver". I mean, would they feel the same way if the person turned out better looking than the pictures? Also, most of us try to put our best pictures up and some people just have more insecurities and poorer judgement than others.
This pretty much sums up my thoughts on the issues. When one goes out with a person that looks 100x better than their profile pic - this is not a complaint or cause to never see them again. It's only when the person doesn't fit into the mental image of attractive does one qualify it as disingenuous. Even if the pic was 10 years old, if they still fit into what one considers attractive then it is overlooked.
Pictures are simply a very small peek into what another looks like. Not what they look like in a normal, every day setting.
No one, not one single person, will look exactly like the pic in their profile. Having said that, I do not enjoy meeting people that have up a picture that in no way represents who they really are or what they look like at least some of the time. I think a nice face picture as well as a full body picture is key when you are really putting yourself out there.
I do think those that are the most sincere in wanting to meet people have up the most 'real' pics. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/8/2008 9:11:20 PM | A few general points.
1) If a man ( or a woman ) looks better in person than he does in a photo, then that is usually because he isn't photogenic. I would highly doubt than a man would use an old photo if he is better looking now than he was 5-10 yrs ago. I would also highly doubt that a man would use a deceptive photo to make himself look worse.
2) I wouldn't reject a man just because he doesn't exactly look his photo or because he is marginally less attractive in person than he is in a photo.
3) However if a man looks much different or is much less attractive in person that he is in a photo, then most likely he used an old or deceptive photo to hide his "flaws". | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/9/2008 4:27:47 AM | I look exactly like the pictures on my profile portrays me.
This is the curse of being average or below...lol...
A rock will always look like a rock, no matter the angle or pixel size/resolution...
I am sure that the OP is aware that many people are slightly insecure ( to put it mildly) about their looks. They judge themselve against the most beautiful people ( in their own opinion ) on television or in the glam mags.
This is not Society's doing. Society is not making these people think like this. They are making themselves think like that. Many otherwise normal/ ugly/ pretty people watch the same shows, see the same movies, read the same magazines and DON"T compare themselves to Clooney or Paltrow or whoever rocks your boat.
Hence the pictures: 10 years overcooked and 30 pounds out of focus.
It is more interesting to me ( not worried and not even concerned ) about the trend of people to alter their profiles description to meet the standards/expectations of the recipient without ever considering that perhaps the person might expect the guy ( frequently it's the guy ) to be just like how his profile portrayed himself to be. You know, out in the real world.
All this is being done to increase their odds of attracting someone to them. HOwever, the women are attracted to those traits. The guy may have put them up there simply to attract more women. Yet , he doesn't possess those traits.
It's like asking ******** to write up a profile for someone else, then the woman is attracted to the words but the person doesn't possess the traits the words describe.
Cyrano de bergerac factor. HOwever, time will out such people. For those people who use this trick, they have a much longer time in which they can show their other good points in order to successful woo their unsuspecting woman.
The women may find it charming that the guy resorted to this tactic.
The picture people are immediately outed. The women are not so easily amused by being offered fake/mis leading photos and are more upset about what they perceive to be an outright lie.
usual disclaimers.
replace pronouns. replace all with some. some with a couple..
anything that offends someone can be redefined as meaning something else.
its all good. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/9/2008 5:53:38 AM | | I saw a profile with glamor shot included ( beware the glamor shot) anyway......in her profile she admitted that the photo was 9 years old........WTF. | |
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| miss leading pics
Posted: 5/9/2008 5:48:01 PM | It continues to amaze/confuse me how several photos (supposedly) of the same person actually appears to quite the opposite.
If you were to go on a date with one of them???? which one do you look out for??? | |
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