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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/3/2008 9:42:05 PM | I hear it all the time. I use it as an intro into what I do in my spare time. That or I just say because I'm picky and move on. Does it bother me, yes it does. It also makes me think and believe I have done the right thing because I am holding out for what I view as the perfect man for me. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/4/2008 12:18:59 PM | I get that question all the time! OR why are you on here? Well I'm on here the same reason everyone else is... to make a connection and seeing the same people over and over again in the same places makes you wonder what else is out there... so that's why I'm single because I'm holding out to find a guy that's honest, can make me laugh and makes a mean grilled cheese!!  | |
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JimNeu
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Joined: 5/18/2008
Msg: 1303 | |
| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/7/2008 3:59:29 PM | | I'm still single cause I chose to be, plain and simple. If a relationship wasn't right, I ended it. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/18/2008 2:53:41 PM | This is a wonderful topic and I really like a lot of the responses.
I can barely add anything else that hasn't been said better in other posts that proclaim their worth is not measured in being married or being single...
I get the question too.
I happen to have an uncle who married at 48 that I can point out to and say: "If he married early, you would not have those 3 wonderful and intelligent kids you absolutely adore today."
Those who marry when the time is right benefit not only themselves but their future kids. The children grow up being loved and being taught the right things in life.
Responsible people add to the good in the world, not create more pain or suffering. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/22/2008 11:16:03 AM | Men ask me this every time I go on a date - and oddly enough, they don't stop to think I could turn the very same question on them. It makes no sense to me. I understand some people are single because they're totally nuts or abusive and psycho, etc... but lots of people are single because they just can't seem to find someone they connect with.
I will never understand all this nonsense in the dating scene. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 8/22/2008 11:25:07 AM | To me, the question is better framed this way:
What's your list of criteria (absolute must-haves) in a partner? THEN.....Why haven't you found anyone that fits those criteria?
I suspect people are not being honest about what they're really looking for and rejecting way too many potentials as unworthy before getting to know them.
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 1:53:59 PM | | Woman asked me the same thing if I tell them I not dating somebody it seems they think I needy. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 2:43:45 PM | I can only assume it's because I live in America, and after the age of 30 finding a good looking American woman with brains and no kids is like finding a good lawyer, damn near impossible.
Charlize Theron, Kate Beckinsale are taken...damn them.
So if I ever want to find my girl I'm going to have to practice law in another country and swat her ass for making me wait for her for so long, of course if she's my girl she's gonna like that kinda thing. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 5:09:45 PM | 53 pages of posting and you would think the subject has been beaten over the head already.
My grandparents were both married at 18 and stayed married for over 60 years. The present generation has been reduced to that of a consumer. An endless cycle where you continually buy crap you don`t need only to feel like you have done something important in your life. Everyone goes to school, university, remains focussed on the career before even thinking about marriage and/or a family. In the end, you`re 35, you have a great condo, a car that gets great gas mileage and an apartment filled with Ikea furniture. You then sit there and wonder what`s wrong with me and why you can`t seem to find that special someone. Perhaps its not meant to be, as I am slowing coming to realize. Or perhaps things just happen for a reason and I will someday find that one person that will make me scoff at ever writing such a ridiculous blog in the first place. Until then though, I stand corrected. We have become the lost generation with no purpose or direction. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 5:25:11 PM | haaaa this has been a fun post to watch
I get that all the time, what are you doing here, why are you single.. LOL
Ummm because we are LOL
With all of us ..........ok almost all of us single poeple here I am sure we have our own reasons, but is it a true question that we have to answer?
With my story, I just came out of a 17 yr faithful relationship, 15 yr marriage which ended in a friendly mutual agreement. You know the kind, had a child at 19 married at 20........got married becuase "it was the right thing to do"
blah.....
Anyway, I think it takes time to find that "special someone" and no, I never had someone on the outside waiting for me, and no, another man or a woman on his side didn't break us up, but so far the dating sure has been fun and man have the times changed :-))
But to keep getting asked that question... no there's nothing wrong with me, no I am not in the self pity sad me poor me state and last, if I did have someone, I sure wouldn't be on an online dating site LOL
I am here because this site is just a different venue outlook on dating and another door that I have chosen to take part in and I love the friends I have been making and the poeple I have been meeting :-))
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 5:46:16 PM | Almasy says:
The present generation has been reduced to that of a consumer. ... You then sit there and wonder what`s wrong with me and why you can`t seem to find that special someone.
"Finding that special someone" is the very consumer mentality you complain about. It presumes that the "special someone" is waiting for you to go shopping and find.
There is no such thing as "that special someone." Reality is that you find someone and make them special to you. The "specialness" comes from YOU by responsible choice and decision. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/1/2008 10:05:23 PM | because I'm totally ghastly looking ..all doughy and pasty like .. lack definition on those short stubbly limbs of mine.. and have a face of a bulldog..
finished (barely) 4th grade due to limited intelligence..miracle I walk upright..
utter lack of humour and constant sourpuss plastered permanently to my face further facilitates singledom
terrible person really.. dishonorable liar with sociopathic tendencies to self absorbed egomania
English isn't my forte either and I'm a foreigner, so that's why I'm single..
Meow? | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 4:00:30 AM | | The man I am with asked me the same question. Wondered what was wrong with the men I had been dating that they had not latched on to me. Was my list of criteria too high? The answer, the right one had not come along until now. I was not seeking the perfect man, just the one perfect for me. Can't imagine my life without out him, wonder how I managed before him. Life can be sweet again. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 11:37:35 AM | | A lot of interesting answers in here and ALSO a lot of BIG EGO'S too...maybe THAT may be one answer to the question for some...... | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 3:22:32 PM | the reason I,m single is no one sends me a messaged, maby the bad boy look is scary or they all think I just want sex,,, I just want to be happy and love some one, but the compitition is so high,, and the old line (you will find the right person) well how about giving a good guy a chance,  | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 5:22:39 PM |
I am still single because I won't share a bathroom....
Oh, now THERE's a reason I can identify with... | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 5:58:10 PM | "I won't share a bathroom."
Now that's an answer I will use at the next family function when someone asks me the inevitable "why are you still single?" question.  | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 6:29:10 PM | There was a thread on here awhile back where a woman said that men who were never married and over 35 were selfish and or narcissistic, I was having a bit of a bad day and wrote this...it kinda sums up why I am still single...
I'm kind of stunned to hear that there are people out there who actually think I'm selfish because I happen to now be 40 and never been married. Let's see, maybe I could have been married a couple of years ago, but I needed to put my new career and my life on hold for a year and a half to care for my elderly parents who both became I'll at the same time, then I lost my father, and need to make sure my 82 year old mother could function without her husband of 65 years..Yeah I guess that's selfish...
Maybe I could have gotten married in the 6 years prior to that but suddenly after working in a career since I was 16, I had a "calling" and ended up (kicking and screaming mind you) to devote 4 years to going to graduate school, so I could help my fellow man...yeah I guess that's selfish...
Maybe I could have gotten married in my early 30's, but let's see I was "working on myself" doing all sorts of personal growth stuff, so I could be a better human being...to potentially be a great partner to someone, and an even better father than my father was to me, because he came from a time where men didn't necessarily show affection, especially to their male children because they wanted them to be tough, and I didn't want to be that kind of parent/husband when I did find the right person to share my life with...yeah I guess that was selfish of me..
Hmm maybe I could have gotten married when I was in my 20's, yeah that would have been a great time, when I was struggling financially, and was basically an arrogant and immature tiwt who didn't know anything about life, and was barely a few years out on my own..hmm that's a great time to get married eh? A better time to be a parent too eh?
Getting married when we're "young and dumb" as opposed to when we've learned a a few things about life, the universe, how to be a partner is "unselfish?" Or the reason the divorce rates are so high, and there's so many people in there 30's and 40's on here (and in society) who are listed as seperated or divorced???
Now that doesn't mean I haven't had relationships...I was engaged once when I was young and dumb, and again about 5 years ago, neither of those worked for various and complicated reason. I've also had a couple long term relationships, where we realized that we weren't "it" for each other and parted ways, and countless other dates and periods of dating women for a short period on the quest for finding the right one...
There's no shame in being single....Our lives are complicated. I'd rather be single and relatively happy than with the wrong one and be miserable...I've been there way too many times. | |
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k/mac
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Joined: 7/30/2008
Msg: 1321 | |
| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/2/2008 6:53:27 PM | Why am I still single? I may sound like a bit of a cynic but........
I've already been in one to many bad marriages for one life time, why would I repeat that mistake? I need someone who will take me as I am and not try to manipulate me to suit them. I will not sacrifice my self respect for anyone. Besides I'm a military guy and there is a war going on (in case you don't watch the news)-you do the math..... | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/3/2008 8:35:18 AM | Does divorced count?
Basically I was single until my late mid 30s. I guess I knew what I wanted and what I didn't want.
This was more difficult as I traveled a lot in my 20s, and never really found anyone I could stay together with. The only ones I liked either went back to exes or someone else. The others just weren't a good fit.
On the entry to my 30s, it seemed liked most of everyone had paired off, and not only were all my friends at home with their spouses and kids, but it seemed most women had gone this route as well. After seeing what marriage life was like through my friends, I was generally turned off. I sought others that wanted to remain childless, which narrowed the availability even more.
I thought I found one that was compatible in this, but in about everything else we weren't. I then began enjoying my peace and quiet and was quite happy for about 5 years without even dating. I was open to it, but not searching and never met anyone I really liked.
Honestly, I find it more curious as to how so many people find partners. I never meet people that I find attractive personality wise and physically at the same time, and that's just the foot in the door to many more things.
Being free to go out and spend time with friends I find great. Dating would be nice, I just am not that desperate for just anything, and not lucky enough to find something really great. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/3/2008 8:58:17 AM | When I was single, it was usually due to combination of reasons.
1. I preferred to remain single.
2. I didn't have time for a serious girlfriend because of work, school etc.
3. The women I liked weren't interested in me and vice versa. | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/3/2008 12:07:31 PM | Does it really matter?
After all, we are all different in the way we look, act and think - it's not about why we are still single so much as why have we chosen not to keep people we once loved around us.
By choice, design or against our will - we are single... let's try to love ourselves a little, celebrate our achievements then, with luck someone may want to share them with us
x | |
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| so, why are you still single?
Posted: 9/3/2008 2:14:15 PM | | Is being single a fate worse than death? Some people seem to feel as if they are less than a complete person if they are not involved in a romantic relationship. My singleness is a choice, which is not a negative thing. | |
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