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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > SO why are you still single after 30?      Home login  
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 EGJV
Joined: 9/13/2008
Msg: 1824
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SO why are you still single after 30?Page 74 of 75    (35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61, 62, 63, 64, 65, 66, 67, 68, 69, 70, 71, 72, 73, 74, 75)
Me:

I'm looking for a woman without kids: about 50% of US population.
I'm looking for a nonreligious woman: about 13% of US population.
I'm looking for a woman not in love with dogs: 0.1% of US population.

I'm an engineer, overweight and don't look like Brad Pitt -> women interested = 0% of US population.

Hence, I'm single.
 roganm
Joined: 10/26/2006
Msg: 1825
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/15/2010 2:06:15 AM
I work nights with no static days off. Kinda makes it hard to meet people.
 minako79
Joined: 1/15/2009
Msg: 1826
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/16/2010 7:14:41 PM

It doesn't work that way" for you because of your laundry list. I think any guy you choose to date will date you. My guess is that there is always something that you find wrong with them. A lot of women are like this. Try opening up to other types of people and you may be luckier in your pursuit of a good catch.
i have thrown out my laundry list a long time ago, i have been pretty open to the types of guys i have dated and i don't want to 'look' for him either, it doesn't worked. i rather be surprised by it when at least expect it.
 Fifi47
Joined: 8/19/2004
Msg: 1827
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/17/2010 3:12:55 AM
I could choose to date many men I might meet but most would not choose to date me. They seem to find plenty wrong with me, as they might need to try opening up to new types of women and be lucky and find a good catch. This philosophy might work for both men and women.
 Sweet_Angela
Joined: 8/6/2009
Msg: 1828
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/17/2010 9:28:27 AM
I'm single because I haven't been looking and when I was looking, I couldn't find the right man. I've been divorced since '91.
 ladyt73
Joined: 3/13/2010
Msg: 1829
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SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/17/2010 3:38:33 PM
I agree, It's not like I can't be in a relationship. I want to be in one but I want to be in one with someone I can trust and who isn't going to lie to me. Also there is a double standard with women dating younger men. I feel as I get older the dating pool is getting smaller. A lot of men and women in their twenties are still playing the field and sometimes even people in their thirties because they have been married and divorced and don't want to do it again.
 BonneyBones
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 1830
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/19/2010 8:10:40 AM
im still single because every guy i date has either cheated on me or just cant deal with my independance and intellect. i was married when i was 18 to a complete psycho and i cant see me making that mistake again, so i take it slow still.
 BonneyBones
Joined: 3/14/2010
Msg: 1831
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/19/2010 8:12:18 AM
also, ladyt73, most men over 30 are still looking for women 18-25. they dont know whats good for them.
 fra59e
Joined: 6/4/2005
Msg: 1832
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SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/21/2010 12:12:38 PM
Maybe a problem is that so many people, especially women, still want to live according to the social conventions they learned when they were in high school.

Younger women today seem more likely to be free from those confining assumptions. Therefore they are certainly going to enjoy a better social life.

Many older women still live by the rules their mothers taught them - "nice girls don't ask men to go out, they wait demure and passive for the man to ask them out." That's just one example.

I think men of all ages can be modern and prefer to be with women who treat them as equals - women who are quite capable of having desires, expressing what they want, and recognizing that sometimes you get it it, sometimes you don't. Women under 30 seldom want to be treated as helpless or reactive or dependent on men for making decisions. It's the older women mostly who are stuck in the gender-role thing.

Granted, there are still some men who are dinosaurs, who feel castrated if they encounter a woman with a will of her own and a bit of self-confidence. But hey, these are a dying breed, and even if some women still want to be treated as princesses on pedestals, they can still be found.

Personally, I like confident independent-spirited people, male or female. Women who know what they are and like being what they are are much more interesting to be with.

.
 JGirlinSD
Joined: 7/16/2008
Msg: 1833
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/21/2010 12:24:41 PM

Maybe a problem is that so many people, especially women, still want to live according to the social conventions they learned when they were in high school.

Younger women today seem more likely to be free from those confining assumptions. Therefore they are certainly going to enjoy a better social life.

Many older women still live by the rules their mothers taught them - "nice girls don't ask men to go out, they wait demure and passive for the man to ask them out." That's just one example.

I think men of all ages can prefer to eb with women who treat them as equals - women who are quite capable of having desires, expressing what they want, and recognizing that sometimes you get it it, sometimes you don't. Women under 30 seldom want to be treated as helpless or reactive or dependent on men for making decisions.



No offense, but this is BS. I tend to find women my own age and older are more independent and willing to ASK out men. I find on here men very rarely ask women out and if we don't make the move..the emails and messages can go on forever. It has nothing to do with being over 30/or under 30.

I think women over 40 seldom want to be treated as helpless or reactive or dependent on men for making decisions. We like to be treated as equals and taken seriously, not as second choice because the young "hottie" turned the guy down.

The reason I am single and over 30? Probably because of the attitude of men like this and perhaps because I realized that I don't have to settle for being treated badly. A younger woman sometimes doesn't realize that good men are out there, the bad boy may be fun for a while, but in reality it's the nice guy that is the best to settle down with.

I realize that I can wait for the man that is right for me and it really isn't fair to a guy if I date him or marry him because no one else I liked better came around...that's wrong.
 12 Volt Man
Joined: 1/1/2010
Msg: 1834
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/21/2010 3:01:38 PM
"The reason I am single and over 30? Probably because of the attitude of men like this and perhaps because I realized that I don't have to settle for being treated badly"

exactly. I got out of a 2 year relationship because I was being taken advantage of and treated like crap. I didn't want to spend the rest of my life acting as someone elses doormat. I respect people and I am honest and don't take advantage of anyone and I expect the same in return. problem is, someone with these values can be hard to come by these days..
 thefirestarter79
Joined: 8/3/2008
Msg: 1835
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/21/2010 3:34:23 PM
I only still single for one reason... I always rejected no matter what I do. Here I am 31 years old and only been on three dates. You think by now I would had a gf, but nope... I gave up finally this year!
 nightman37
Joined: 1/18/2009
Msg: 1836
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so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/22/2010 9:39:26 AM
I've add so much time, but such bad luck, a very long just good friends relship in the 20s, the next a hen picking woman, who left a with my best friend first time I stood up to her, in my thirty one woman, tuned out to be cocaine junky. If wall women were like that, I'd probably be better of single, which doesn't stop my heart screaming lonely some of the time.
 jody321
Joined: 1/17/2010
Msg: 1837
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/23/2010 9:37:40 PM
i find alot of men assume that cuz im single and older that i just want sex . it is also harder too find one who is mature enff too handle a independant woman ..i wonder if they just threatened by it...
 dave878
Joined: 2/22/2010
Msg: 1838
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SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/23/2010 10:06:11 PM


Maybe a problem is that so many people, especially women, still want to live according to the social conventions they learned when they were in high school.

Younger women today seem more likely to be free from those confining assumptions. Therefore they are certainly going to enjoy a better social life.

Many older women still live by the rules their mothers taught them - "nice girls don't ask men to go out, they wait demure and passive for the man to ask them out." That's just one example.

I think men of all ages can be modern and prefer to be with women who treat them as equals - women who are quite capable of having desires, expressing what they want, and recognizing that sometimes you get it it, sometimes you don't. Women under 30 seldom want to be treated as helpless or reactive or dependent on men for making decisions.

No offense, but this is BS. I tend to find women my own age and older are more independent and willing to ASK out men. I find on here men very rarely ask women out and if we don't make the move..the emails and messages can go on forever. It has nothing to do with being over 30/or under 30.

I think women over 40 seldom want to be treated as helpless or reactive or dependent on men for making decisions. We like to be treated as equals and taken seriously, not as second choice because the young "hottie" turned the guy down.

The reason I am single and over 30? Probably because of the attitude of men like this and perhaps because I realized that I don't have to settle for being treated badly.

It's not BS, the poster wasn't saying all women over 30 are thus confined, just that many are (and not just women: the similarly old-school men they're more likely to encounter reinforce their assumptions, and vice versa, and so it goes on). I really don't see any contradiction between your experiences; you've just had different ones. And some women and men are traditionally- and others modern-minded whether at 20 or 50: I suspect though that the net effect is to limit the range available to both more traditional youngsters and modern over-30s owing to to the impact of cultural change in society at large and the tendency among many to embrace convention & conformity in later life.
 EuroRd94
Joined: 2/3/2010
Msg: 1839
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/24/2010 11:11:09 PM
Three simple reasons.

1. I have been constantly rejected for dates and feel like that I will never hear 'yes.'

2. I'm an Asian that prefers white women.

3. I'm a true romantic at heart and that is the biggest turn-off these days.
 hotrodharry1974
Joined: 12/30/2008
Msg: 1840
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/25/2010 4:52:08 PM
I live in a small town. I don't drink and hit the bars anymore. That's pretty much it here, never really had a date. Just sleeping around type stuff in my 20's. The dating scene is basically incestuous here. But I'm glad that I sobered up, got lucky and got away with all that. Now I have my whole life ahead of me. Moving next month for school. It's going to be great. It's so liberating just to get out of here for a day. I know there's worse, but this town is not good.
 navywoman
Joined: 3/20/2010
Msg: 1841
so, why are you still single?
Posted: 3/25/2010 6:51:35 PM
I am single because of my career and honestly don't regret one minute of it. I have lived the life I was meant to live and still thoroughly enjoy life. If I was meant to meet someone then great; if not then I guess I will stay single. Doesn't mean I still can't have a full life and lots of fun.
 RustyStrummer
Joined: 2/17/2010
Msg: 1842
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/25/2010 10:09:09 PM
this is a good age to be single. Wise enough to know what you want, young enough to still look good... heck thats the best of both worlds between older and younger
 Fizics
Joined: 12/13/2009
Msg: 1843
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SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/25/2010 10:41:49 PM
I can't decide if most of the posts in this forum are trolls or many people sing the cognitive dissonance song like it's a show tune. Endless posts from both sexes of "I'm not going to settle, no way I'm settling, that (wo)man was probably no good anyway".

Anything to keep hope alive I guess.
 eurosteve
Joined: 9/24/2009
Msg: 1844
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/26/2010 2:35:25 AM
I am cute, single, 31 and have never been married, had children or even been engaged. I just keep running into bad apples, one after the other.. I have actually given up for a while and will focus on myself right now, if the right one doesnt come along. I will be a grumpy old man with a bunch of cats ;) ehehehehe
 WomanInProgress
Joined: 10/16/2005
Msg: 1845
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SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:12:36 AM
Same reason I would be single under 30.

No one that floats my boat.
Not important in the scheme of things going on in my life.
My schedule/lifestyle isn't conducive to a relationship.
I don't care to search so I'm not paying that much attention to it.
There are times in life it just happens that you are single by choice, or by situation.

There are also times people aren't single over/under 30. Asking them why gives you the same answers. Because at that time in life that's where they're at.
 aball5
Joined: 3/9/2010
Msg: 1846
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/26/2010 9:20:50 AM
Personally I am happy alot of people are still single. I understand how hard it is to wake every single morning with a person. I am a light sleeper and the flick of a light switch wakes me up. Nothing wrong there, they are ones who have a problem.
 mike_714
Joined: 3/11/2010
Msg: 1847
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/26/2010 1:33:37 PM
Balding, fat, fugly. You know, the usual. :) Not being down on myself or looking for sympathy. I'm just being honest.
 eroot
Joined: 2/1/2009
Msg: 1848
SO why are you still single after 30?
Posted: 3/27/2010 5:52:05 AM
why am i single...

i didn't make getting married a priority.

focused on my career, travel, and enjoying myself. that being said i have not been against getting married, and have been engaged, but the engagement was long enough for both of us to figure out marriage wasn't for us.

personally, i find it much more disturbing the question of "Why did you get married when you were 20?" ;p

though to be fair:

http://site.despair.com/images/dpage/dysfunction03.jpg
Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > SO why are you still single after 30?