| | Why a virgin?Page 11 of 19 (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19) | This is a really interesting thread. Most of the threads on this topic are decididly ANTI-Virgin. It's kind of nice to see other people keeping to the same ideals.
I'm a virgin.. I plan on remaining one until I'm married... and it's not easy. I don't know about the rest of you here, but I get a lot of flack from men while I'm out on dates. Some guys see it as a challenge and want to score the unscorable.
Is unscorable a word? | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/22/2006 11:26:51 PM | I was a virgin until 22, and yes, I used to get the flak too. It only comes from people who just want to have sex with you.
The reason why a lot of the comments are usually anti-virgin is because the rest of us know both sides of the coin. We were virgins too, for various reasons, and I think most people will agree that they grew a lot since their status changed. Why? It makes you see that morality extends far beyond chastity. It makes you more empathetic and less likely to judge or categorize.
Personally, I don't believe in waiting until marriage. If you do it for religious reasons, I respect that, very much so. But if you do it because you want to give someone a pure you, then you'd better make sure s/he can return the favor. Otherwise, you're extremely likely to objectify yourself - people don't say "I want someone attractive, intelligent, with a great career, kind, and who happens to be a virgin." No, they say "I want a virgin." You can't miss the irony - virgins are much more of a fetish than men or women who have been reasonably sexually active. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/23/2006 5:15:16 PM | Felinessa,
"I want someone attractive, intelligent, with a great career, kind, and who happens to be a virgin" is exactly what I say. It's that little something extra. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 12:06:42 AM | | Then pray that she doesn't want that little extra too :) | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 3:01:12 AM | | Through my experience, Men get the flacks from friends who thinks sex is no deal and that virgins will regret the experience, but it can a religious thing, people have their beliefs and sticks to them. But to married a virgin, you have to be a virgin yourself. | |
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dcx10
| | Joined: 9/13/2005
Msg: 256 | |
| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 4:58:58 AM | The quesion that should be asked is "why NOT a virgin?"
Why do we want to be placed first in any competitive situation? Why would anyone want a gold medal in Olympics? Why do anyone want to be the first man who climbed Mount Everest? Rightly or wrongly, human beings obviously attach tremendous meanings on being the "first".
Most of the world's major cultures place tremendous value on female virginity. This is particularly true in non-western culture such as Islamic civilization. Of course, conservative Christians share the same belief when it comes to female virginity.
And no, to marry a vrigin, you don't have to be a virgin yourself.  | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 2:08:18 PM | Felinessa,
I hope that she DOES want that little something extra too, because I have that to offer her and so much more...
Everyone,
Why do you suppose our "firsts" are so memorable? I think I'm guilty of putting too much emphasis on "firsts". Though, wouldn't we all rather be the best than the first? | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 5:48:44 PM | OP: My ex's cousin was into that. Nice kid. Engineer. Makes good money. Complete Dork! LOL. Seriously. As a guy, I think anyone, other than perhaps a member of the Royal Family, who requires it has so few skills with a girl that a virgin is the only way he can stand a chance of thinking he is good in the sack.
The sad thing is, that experience helps, but is not the arbiter. Listing to your partner and being considerate of thier needs is way more important. And some complete dorks are better at listening than a lot of jocks. Weird. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 6:00:48 PM | | No, you just got a jackass. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 6:28:09 PM | That'll work for the minority of the people on the planet that are Christian.
OH Wait! Perhaps not. At least if past behaviour is any indicator... | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/24/2006 7:39:42 PM | | And for those of us who aren't religious and don't think any indiscretions will send us straight to hell...? | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/27/2006 6:41:24 PM | Right...Ernest..which century are you from? I'm a virgin and it's my choice, I'm not a virgin because I think and i quote "the man has to be experienced while the woman is pure and holy"get over it loser!Oh and guess what, I'd never even date someone like you, and I hope no virgin will, with the cheap mentality that you have.Men and women are equal.If a man can sleep with dozens of women ,then so can a woman.What are you, a lowly primitive cave man?!God....can't believe men like you still exist! | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 4:48:27 PM | Someone recently told me that some men prefer virgins because they're seen as "loyal", meaning that they won't cheat on them and they have amazing willpower because they've gone without sex and resisted temptation for so long.
That was the first I'd ever heard of it, but then it did kind of make sense. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 5:22:27 PM | | So should we prefer guys who are virgins cuz they're loyal? I think that's a load of crap. Loyalty and virginity are two separate issues.... | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 5:29:48 PM | Jezika, you are right. A guy could be a virgin but was dumped because he was caught kissing another woman. They are two very different issues.
There are those who want to wait until marriage for intercourse. Now if a man wanted me to do that I would respect his feelings if I loved him enough to marry him. However, I fall in the middle on this one, not believing in either extreme of "sex too soon" or waiting all the way to the wedding day. I personally feel that engagement to marry is a good marker for commitment and a good point to have first intercourse with a man. It's more meaningful than sex too soon. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 5:38:08 PM | Yep, sopme want to wait for marriage... some don't... shouldn't matter....
but then what do I know? I have yet to experience that aspect of life... | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 6:05:12 PM | | I dunno, I've always wanted to settle down with a virgin because I myself am a virgin at the ripe age of 21. But I've never seen it as a must have... really though, if you gave a guy a chance of two beautiful women, one a virgin and one not, I think almost every guy would go for the virgin for both the pleasure and the fact that they know they've been the only one to experience them. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/29/2006 6:32:23 PM | But there's more to a person than their sexual status. I mean there's the whole personality thing... shared interests... money (don't kid yourself, it's a factor!)... physical attraction... all sorts of other important stuff.... why focus on virginity or lack thereof?
I mean guys have written me off because I'm a virgin... I think writing someone off because they aren't or even placing less importance on other factors is just as lame... | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 12:13:47 AM | | When it comes to sex and things related to sex, if other things are equal,experience loses to non-experience. Amateur strip tease dancers win over professionals. Virgins win over non-virgins. Experience is worthless. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 11:48:34 AM | In my schooling days, one of the most common reason for a virgin GF would be more due to the "Trophy" factor attached to it...
For me a virgin women would signify that she has more will power to resist the best temptations. so atleast on the face of it she looks a stronger individual to me.
In job hunting, your future employer looks at your past experience to verify whether you are fit enuff for future work. And thats what with GF/BF, if you are a virgin you atleast seem to be chaste. Atleast it means that sex is very very personal and intimate to you, so unless you show long-term commitment, you dont get it.
lastly but not least... i had a friend whose GF was not virgin and she had a bad previous relationship. Once in a get-together, his ex-bf just strolled across to her in his BF's presence and told him right on the face in front of everyone , Your GF tastes good, I know that.. And that poor chap was so embarassed... I do not want my GF's past to put me in such embarassment... you know what I mean
But I guess all the above things does not say that if you are not virgin then you do not show those characterstics and being virgin does not gaurantee those characterstics either. But what it definitely tells me is that if you are a virgin, you have something extra which I respect and care about. 
I would also agree on that, its a bit too much to ask, if you are exclusivley looking out for a virgin GF/BF. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 12:10:06 PM | OT:
Did anyone know that physicians are now replacing a woman's "CHERRY"
That's right!!! Sewing the HYMEN back over the vagina passage, so that when she gets
married her Husband can take her "Virginity"???????????
So does that make you a virgin then?? that you have a hymen??
Do you think my future husband would know if I hadn't *ucked him prior to the wedding that I wasn't a virgin before meeting him??? | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 2:25:27 PM | | lol lots of girls don't have hymens even before having sex for various reasons... I wouldn't call someone a virgin if they had bought a new hymen- nor would I call someone who's hymen was damaged through other means a non-virgin. | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 4:20:36 PM | I'm kind of split on this one.
I can't really expect to marry a virgin, since I am not one. However, if she's slept with like 10 dudes, I'm not marrying her. A virgin would be ideal though | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 4:28:38 PM | Well, I guess it depends on the age group, but in my case if I am looking for a virgin then I would have to start raising german shepards and doing the animal thing LOL (just kidding).
But really virgins are hard to find and even if I was in the age group (13-16 LOL)where I might be able to find one, I think I would rather have a woman that did know a thing or two about making love (or even just having sex in this situation). I have been with two virgins and I didn't enjoy either one (at first). I think that you will find all kinds of men out there in the real world, so just don't go out with a man that is looking for a virgin. Maybe that should be one of your first questions before you waste a lot of time on a man (or have sex with a man that isn't interested in anything other than sex with you). Tracy | |
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| Why a virgin?
Posted: 3/31/2006 8:07:32 PM | felanie:
lol ... virgin does not mean "Hymen Intact"  ... u have to trust your partner in his / her answer.. comon if you do not have even that much trust, then forget even expecting a virgin... you are not good enuff for your partner  | |
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