| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 2/18/2008 2:24:09 PM | "Little Northern Gal"
Rape is when you don't want it. If you wake up and say no thanks and he/she doesn't stop, then that is the definition. If you get aroused and say, "hey baby...you're welcome here anytime," that's just hot.
Myself... most times, bring it on!
Excuse me paleeeeeezzzzzzzzeeeeee !!!!
In 1989 I was passed out at a female friends house, "totally chemicalled up". Ther were four to five females at the apartment when I went to lay down, the owner of the apartment came in and said they were all going to another apartment in th complex as to not make so much noise and let me sleep.
I was awakened by someone performing oral sex on me, as I awoke, she was very apologetic and started to say she hadn't been with anyone in a long time, I said go for it, she stripped down and mounted me. I lasted about 30 seconds after that, it was so hot. She got dressed and left and I don't know who she was, or if she had become pregnant from the encounter.
I do need to say that I was scared to death as I was awakened, to find this stranger sucking my privates.
As for it being consenual sex or rape.
It was most certainly a sexual molestation, I have considered it rape because I didn't give this person permission to touch me, undress me, put my penis in her mouth.
After I awakened and gave the nod to proceed, it was consensual.
Now if I hold her to the same standards of Rape that are being applied to males and date rape, ie taking advantage of a person who was impaired by drugs or booze, it would be rape.
Things are different when people are a couple, and willingly sleeping in the same bed.
It would'nt be rape in this case unless either partner has specifically said that this behavior is unacceptable. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/17/2008 8:43:12 AM | | I would LOVE to be with someone that did that. And someone I could do that to. I don't understand how this is rape...Especially since I would never say no when I am awake to my SO.. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/17/2008 1:15:36 PM | Being woke up for nookie? Hell yeah!
Being half asleep means I'm uber relaxed. :)
It's only rape if you say No and try to remove yourself from the situation with no success. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/17/2008 2:41:19 PM | well if you didn't consent I guess it would be cosidered rape , but are you going to contest it if a woman that you already thought was worthy enough to sleep with wakes you up by slobbing your knob? I THINK NOT! | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/24/2008 10:02:26 AM | | i hate been asked, if we are in a relationship, take it when you want it! after all if i have chosen to be in a relationship with someone, then i will feel safe in the knowledge that he wouldnt do anything to hurt me physically or emotionally. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/25/2008 3:45:06 PM | I don't know if i would like it... I mean... I wake up and he's having sex with me... Even if he is my bf, is he using protection? Hes not the one that might get pregnant after all.
I think it most definitely could be rape. If uve spoken about it before and u like it then fine. If uve never spoken about it then.. its rape. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 3/28/2008 8:25:32 PM |
I think it most definitely could be rape. If uve spoken about it before and u like it then fine. If uve never spoken about it then.. its rape.
If you allowed him to sleep in YOUR bed, WITH you, then what do you expect? I don't know what "uve" means, but if it's an attempt at English, I would like to know. No, that's not rape. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 9:31:56 AM | [I would love it.]
I completely agree........As spontaneous as this may be , being woken up at 440 in the morning, something magical about that time, is usually an interlude that has been reflected on at some point along the way....and if it works for both of you , then go for it..WHAT A WAY TO WAKE UP!!!  But then you can go back to bed to do it ALL over again later! | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 2:46:58 PM | I think this is something that needs to be discussed first. Prior consent can carry over here, but without that, it's nonconsensual and a violation. I would never do that with a partner whose permission I hadn't gotten first, and I would feel violated if someone did that to me without my prior consent.
So if it's a turn-on for you and your partner knows that, that's cool. Definitely something worth asking about before trying, though! | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 2:52:14 PM |
It would'nt be rape in this case unless either partner has specifically said that this behavior is unacceptable.
I disagree with this.
Nonconsensual sex is sex where consent has not been obtained. If a partner has been asleep, you have not obtained prior consent for molesting your sleeping partner, and you do so without obtaining consent, then it is nonconsensual, by definition. It's a somewhat grey area, but obtaining consent involves, you know, actually obtaining consent, not simply a lack of a no.
If I were with a partner who felt he had the right to do this without prior consent, the relationship would be very short-lived. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 3:05:51 PM | | I could definitely see how it could be a problem if someone didn't want this to happen to them, and the partner went ahead anyway. It would be damn annoying if someone kept doing it when they knew you didn't want it, and you just wanted to feel safe going to sleep and want to be left alone to get some sleep. Probably if your friend got a divorce, and this was the case, then it's probably indicative in general of how he didn't take her feelings into consideration in many situations, not just this one. The first time of course is going to be an experiment, and if one of them didn't like it, then they need to discuss it, and it shouldn't really cause too much trouble. If someone does it again, after that discussion, then yes, that can lead to feeling violated. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 3:52:12 PM | Personally I enjoy being woken up for some nookie!  In my book it's not rape whatsoever. It's a partner expressing his desire for his partner. No diff than initiating sex or lovemaking during waking hours. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/20/2008 6:27:42 PM | if only life worked so easily. i use to be a sexual creature and not sure any longer...a gal 8-10 years ago kept kicking me when i wanted to get it on- i'd have to hear about her needing to be up early for work...what a bunch of crap...i told her i was the one who was gonna be doing all the work! what does the woman have to do except just lay there and accept it?
3 year of this got me to think of porn to supplement my needs. just 10 times a week with her and 30 times a week with my fantasy girls.
what a stupid freaking life. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/21/2008 8:23:21 PM | It is only rape if you say no and he doesn't stop, or a random stranger who breaks in.
Was with a new guy and he woke me up very nicely..... for round 2. It was GGRREEAATT | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/21/2008 9:28:01 PM | My opinion is that she was looking for a reason to break up with the guy.
1. I seriously doubt that the guy in question waited 6 years to make that kind of move
2. If it was that offensive to her I doubt she would have waited 6 years to get rid of him
Nope my opinion she wanted a divorce but was looking to make herself out to be the victim in this case. That way she won't ever look like the bad guy. | |
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| Is being woke up with sexual favors rape or not?
Posted: 4/21/2008 9:31:14 PM | Broke up a marriage because their husband desired them in the middle of the night?! Oh my....we should all be so lucky. lol
I don't define this as rape. This is an ideal scenario for a healthy sexual connection with one's partner.
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