| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 2:14:14 PM | Hi Fishisme, I have also come across this attitude in men before, alas I do not have the answer. Except, be guided by your own gut feelings, and don't let any guy talk you into something you are not ready for. One thing we tend to forget is that the guys are also testing the water, some fo them are free for the first time in years after long relationships and marriages, and boys will be boys, so ladies beware.  | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 2:23:49 PM | That's when I said that we needed to slow down......But
what can a person do if the other half is hell bent on
plunging ahead....into the unknown.....of who knows
what?
Just remember this old Chinese wisdom and you'll be fine..
Confucious say man with hand in pocket feel cockky... | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 3:11:51 PM | | There was also a Thread on Con-artists...good to read sounds like one of the traits. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 3:20:59 PM | You know this is a typical complaint of men too, I'd argue probably more so stereotypicaly, and when I say men I mean those of us without boyfriends.
I've been overanxious before, but never arrogant or presumptive. Well, maybe almost never. Anyway, OT: The Hotel Room thing makes me wonder what thef? If it is in your area there why not go to one of your places, or at least leave the hotel option open. Aren't there like a gazillion hotel rooms there?
So, remember that for every obsessive pscycho there are several good men. Some of us even want a woman with a live of her own. He wasn't expatriated Taliban by any chance was he?
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 3:30:33 PM | I think you got the right attitude.
I think this guy was the classic control freak, and that was a good sign of things that would have come with him....
I think age is irrelevent in dating...most girls would want to go out and have fun and let things flow naturally with no pressure.
Boys chasing Girls? The most successful daters I've known never chase girls, they take them out, have fun, keep things light and positive and if you do this enough times, then you have a relationship, and you didn't even need to have 'the talk'
I think you'll know you've met a nice guy when you feel no pressure, and things just unfold naturally.
You sound sweet, so I would just stay positive and I am sure a better guy will come along
JG | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 3:34:29 PM | One of the best pieces of advice given to me about internet dating was "a good man will always give you an out." If he is truly caring and concerned about you, he will never pressure you to go faster than you want to go. He will never force you into a situation that makes you feel uncomfortable. He will want you to feel safe and secure, especially considering the nature of internet dating.
Yes, indeed, you're better off renewing your search for a kinder, more sensible man. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 3:54:29 PM | | Aww geez, I wish I read that about 2 days ago. My timing always sucks. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 6:09:02 PM | I'm confused here. You had two very positive dates and he wants to make plans for a festival a month from now and you find he's rushing things?
Not much to go on here but assuming you will see him a few more times before the festival why would agreeing to go be considered rushing? Obviously, your going would be contingent on the next few dates going well.
Many times someone will date a few people at the same time or date someone while looking for something better. I think he just wanted to see where he stood and if you felt he was going too fast it's reasonable for him to assume you didn't feel there was future with him or you were not interested in being exclusive and finding out.
In short, if the first two dates were great and you felt the next few dates before the festival would be good what reason would you have not to accept the invitation? My guess and it's only a guess based on a few assumptions is that he felt you were seeing other people and he decided he wasn't interested in playing that game. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 6:53:12 PM | | Sounds like a control freak... maybe had alterior motives. Maybe you were more than he expected to find and wanted to ensure he got to keep it. The insecurity alone is reason enough to say good riddins. Chalk it up to two good dates. That alone can be hard to find. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 8:10:42 PM | Congratulations! I'm SO happy for YOU!
Whew, that was a close one.......
You know, getting pushed around=bad. 
Welcome back to the dating world, here's a virtual band-aid for you. Have a beer, answer a new e-mail. It might be from: "the one" you know. Mwhahaha! 
Go have a good laugh with your girlfriends at lunch and be careful out there! | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 8:24:58 PM | | In the past yes, and in the future if I out live my husband maybe. But only if its someone that is worth being with. If it takes time for you to get to that point. then take your time. If he was able to walk away so fast, then be glad he did. It would of been something else later down the road, and it would of hurt more. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 8:31:35 PM | If I ever thought I'd found a potential future husband, I'd skip the grand reception, and instead pay the big bucks for a DSMV 5 test of the man.
I'm not kidding. Psychological illnesses are dangerous things.
This guy she ran across, he was loaded for bear. What a lucky girl! | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 9:21:32 PM |
If I ever thought I'd found a potential future husband, I'd skip the grand reception, and instead pay the big bucks for a DSMV 5 test of the man.
Hey, one fish.....
What is a DSMV 5 test?????????
Thanks!
fishisme | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 9:24:29 PM | dave1234
He had planned our dates all the way to April 1st.....And he said he wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer.....
fishisme | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 9:36:29 PM |
So, remember that for every obsessive pscycho
there are several good men. Some of us even want a
woman with a live of her own. He wasn't expatriated
Taliban by any chance was he?
double cabin.....
A life of her own.....Who doesn't want a life of her own...even in a relationship? Smothering is most unappealing.
Hah!........Obsessive anti-Bush guy is more like it.
Thanks for the input!
fishisme | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 9:38:18 PM |
So, remember that for every obsessive pscycho
there are several good men. Some of us even want a
woman with a live of her own. He wasn't expatriated
Taliban by any chance was he?
double cabin.....
A life of her own.....Who doesn't want a life of her own...even in a relationship? Smothering is most unappealing.
Hah!........Obsessive anti-Bush guy is more like it.
LOVE UR NATURE PICS IN YOUR PROFILE, double cabin....
U r one awesome photographer!!!!!!!!!!
Thanks for the input!
fishisme | |
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~iiCe~
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Joined: 7/26/2005
Msg: 43 | |
| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 11:48:20 PM | DSMV = Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 5th Ed....
back to regularly scheduled programing.... | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 11:56:30 PM |
DSMV = Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders 5th Ed....
Thanks, iice.....Wish I would have been privy to that manual a few days ago.....
fishisme | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/4/2006 11:59:12 PM | f1stdiana....
Indeed, ladies beware....
Gut feelings need to
be reckoned with...
Thanks!
fishisme | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/5/2006 12:04:55 AM |
Confucious say man with hand in pocket feel****y...
Confucius say:
It does not matter how slowly you go so long as you do not stop.
I need to find me a Confucius, scottymac!
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/5/2006 4:37:43 AM |
(Msg 41)He had planned our dates all the way to April 1st.....
Maybe he was a bit like that Rainman movie character Dustin Hoffman played. They tend to be good with numbers and dates. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/8/2006 12:34:06 PM | I just had the same thing happen with woman.
When I would not let her into my family/personal life after three (successful) dates, she said she needed more.
Not going to happen. It takes me quite awhile to feel comfortable enough and sure enough of a relationship to allow someone unfettered access to my life. The fact that I tend to lead a pretty public life may have a lot to do with protecting my privacy. Other than that I am an open book.
However, planning a future together and starting up the rumour mill, when we are still barely getting to know each other seems more like trying to force a commitment than a healthy respect for my feelings and those of my children.
Just my thoughts. | |
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ya472
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Joined: 8/8/2005
Msg: 49 | |
| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 1/8/2006 1:07:59 PM | ..
Well he was repulsed by my request to slow down,
Fishisme
Sounds like he was chasing you into a gill-net; easy in and can't back out !
.. | |
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| Full Speed Ahead?!?
Posted: 2/10/2007 9:26:51 PM | | Full Speed Ahead? ....Ummm YAH! and don't look back, unless you like that kind of "controlling and selfish type" of guy. Good luck. | |
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