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Show ALL Forums  > Dating and Love Advice  > Registered Sex Offender?!?      Home login  
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 smilindad
Joined: 10/21/2005
Msg: 101
Registered Sex Offender?!?Page 5 of 11    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11)
loving you i have to agree with you how the hell is the victim at fault are all the people in the bank when it get robbed at fault .let me guess they put the gun in the robbers hand and forced him to rob the bank.or the perv that molests kids did that five yr. old just jump in the vehicleand force them to molest them it's not the victims faultit's the offendertheres and theres alone
 Linguatic
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 102
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 1:29:34 PM
I think I'm going to have to get "We ID under 35" tattooed on my wang.
 cuter_than_anyone
Joined: 10/28/2005
Msg: 103
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 1:43:34 PM
some people are




ate up

thank god this is the internet and this is the closest i will get to you
 Linguatic
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 104
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 1:56:12 PM
I don't eat people, I won't eat people. Eating people is wrong.
 MsAnnThrope
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 105
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 3:26:03 PM
Eating people is only wrong when there's other food available.
 anApplepear
Joined: 12/9/2005
Msg: 106
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 3:36:31 PM
My heart really aches for this man. So it is to me, he is now 30, and for the rest of his life he will have to live alone without a wife and a family until he died. He better die soon.

Don't want to read this Thread any more.
 heather2005
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 107
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 3:53:06 PM
whoever said i was judgemental nope not really i just find it funny that everyone kept saying dump him he's a child molester/pedophile all that when what really happened was a complete accident. yes i have children who i would never let an actual child molester anywhere near and i absolutley loathe them and think they should be in prison for life and their balls cut off. but i also know as i was once a teenage girl that they LIE bigtime. the #1 thing being their age. as i said though this guy clearly regrets it. however most people i know seeing someone in a bar would assume that the bar had carded them and they were of age as i also said the bar here let's them in all the time with the excuse i left my id at home. i still really can't figure out how the bar employee and owner weren't charged in this case they should have been defendants as well for not checking this girls id. but if the OP can't handle it it is better to dump him now, that way maybe he can find someone who will look past his mistakes.
 Linguatic
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 108
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 4:01:39 PM

Eating people is only wrong when there's other food available.


I think this is going off-topic now, should be a thread of its own. "Why is it wrong to eat people? (the taste that dare not speak its name)"
 MsAnnThrope
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 109
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 4:06:35 PM
I'm SO THERE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LOL
 heather2005
Joined: 6/9/2005
Msg: 110
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 4:13:23 PM
i don't mind being eaten
 guaponalgon
Joined: 11/5/2005
Msg: 111
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/11/2006 5:48:06 PM
The key is empathy I think, Put yourself in his shoes! From what I have heard ,if his story is correct, he got a bum wrap.The way I see the situation is that he was in complete ignorance until he found out and then he made the right decision and took her home, Now if he had continued and had sex with her afterwards , then he is scum!but if his story is correct I think he is not a bad guy ,a bit naieve but not bad.
 indy38
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 112
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:34:45 AM
I'll just say two things...

1) As Ronald Reagan used to say "Trust but verify". Politics aside that was excellent sage advise from the ol' gipper.

Get the court records and if they don't backup what he's already told you "run for the hills" would be my reaction, but that's a decision only you can make.

2)Everyone keeps saying there's no way he couldn't of know she was under 18. Besides that not being true, legal age of consent in NC is only 16 (I believe), least the last time I checked it was anyway.

In NC if a 16 yr old has a grampa/grandma fetish and wants to say yes to some 60 yr old it's legal as long as it isn't really her grampa/grandma. heheh. Not saying it's morally right but it's legal. He may have known or suspected she was younger then 18, just not that young and he screwed up big time.

Here in FL I think it's 16 up to 23 yrs old, 18 for 24+ yr olds

TRUST BUT VERIFY... once you know the truth you'll be better able to decide how you feel about the situation.

If you haven't already been to the NC DOJ "North Carolina Offender Information" website check it out.

http://www.doc.state.nc.us/offenders/

click "Offender Information - Public search"

From there click "Search for an Offender"

Do a name search for him and follow the link to see his most recent incarceration information and then at the bottom of the page click the "View Sentence History" to see the complete incarceration records for him.

Once your done reading all that stuff write down or cut and paste his DOC number and go back to the main menu.

http://webapps6.doc.state.nc.us/apps/offender/menu1

Now do a "View Offender Data for Advanced Users" search

enter his DOC# and check all 15 check boxes for the following information...

Probation and Parole Client Profile
Impact Scheduling Request
Inmate Profile
Sentence Computations
Parole Analyst Review
Disciplinary Infractions
Financial Obligation
Offender Profile
Court Commitment
Arrest Record
Escape Record (non DOC)
Military History
Sentence Component
Special Conditions and Sanctions
Warrant Issued

Read up...

Not sure what you need to do at the court house to access court records...

There's also a link on the first page I gave above to the sex offender registry database but I assume you've already looked at that and all it tells you is name, statute convicted under, addresses, and their picture.
 indy38
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 113
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:44:00 AM
oops I see you've already been to the courthouse, nevermind!

oh well you might have some fun running other names you know through the above links. lol

Wish I could walk in and check a few North Carolinians out myself!

NC farms out online access to even basic court docket / trail info to private $$$ pay for access companies...
 MsAnnThrope
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 114
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:53:52 AM
Hey, Indy420, that's some good stuff. I was thinking she may not have gotten the whole story, but it didn't occur to me that he might have a criminal history that he forgot to mention. Perhaps that accounts for the harsh sentence he received for "only making out with a girl he thought was 18."

 newintown503
Joined: 9/7/2005
Msg: 115
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:11:36 AM
I've already checked all of that out, thanks for the info anyway.

msannthrope: The sentencing requirements for "indecencies with a minor" are 2 -10 years. He served 21 months = he served less than the required two years. I think I already stated that?
 MsAnnThrope
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 116
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:13:35 AM
The judge has a lot of leeway with sentencing. A first-time offender can end up with just probation. There are sentencing GUIDELINES, but in the end a judge has ultimate discretion over what penalty is actually handed down.
 R-U-Here
Joined: 6/21/2005
Msg: 117
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:20:19 AM
Everyone,

Cut her some slack she broke up with the guy. She took everyones advice and did what she believed to be right.


But it doesn't matter now. Even though I never believed him capable of hurting a child or anything like that, his past would taint any kind of future that we could have had together. I feel bad but I am just not ready to settle for a man (albeit, a very great and loving man) who has such a huge thing in his past and quite a chip on his shoulder. So we broke up.


She spent allot of time defending him but realized in the long run what she was in for. She did the right thing in my opinion, good for you, Newintown.
 newintown503
Joined: 9/7/2005
Msg: 118
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:41:57 AM
Thank you, loving you.

I'm just confused as to why people still insist that they know more about his situation than I do. I have seen his entire criminal history and have looked through all of the files pertaining to this situation. I didn't bother to research his speeding tickets but I didn't think that was pertainent information. Other than that, it's been covered and throughly researched.
 Linguatic
Joined: 4/18/2005
Msg: 119
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:48:43 AM
NC farms out online access to even basic court docket / trail info to private $$$ pay for access companies...

My neighbor works with various state prison systems, and he was showing me some of these info systems. His wife interjected "it's just like online dating, they have pictures and everything!"

And, so they do. I think it was illinois' sex offender registry that includes photographs. I didn't get a chance to run a search for FSM, tho'.


I'm just confused as to why people still insist that they know more about his situation than I do. I have seen his entire criminal history and have looked through all of


Because this is the POF forums, baby! Uninformed opinion trumps fact anytime!
 R-U-Here
Joined: 6/21/2005
Msg: 120
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:51:49 AM

Thank you, loving you


No problem I'm sure it has to be getting quite annoying by now to have people saying the same thing when you already took the advice and did the split. I hate seeing a damsel in distress and I could tell it is starting to agrivate you.
 MsAnnThrope
Joined: 11/28/2005
Msg: 121
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:56:17 AM
Yes, well, the topic DID expand into a broader discussion of the general situation rather than her specific experience, as topics often do. No point in being aggravated about it; you posted on a public forum and a lot of people discussed it.
 molonel
Joined: 12/20/2005
Msg: 122
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 10:23:38 AM

whoever said i was judgemental nope not really i just find it funny that everyone kept saying dump him he's a child molester/pedophile all that when what really happened was a complete accident. yes i have children who i would never let an actual child molester anywhere near and i absolutley loathe them and think they should be in prison for life and their balls cut off. but i also know as i was once a teenage girl that they LIE bigtime. the #1 thing being their age. as i said though this guy clearly regrets it. however most people i know seeing someone in a bar would assume that the bar had carded them and they were of age as i also said the bar here let's them in all the time with the excuse i left my id at home. i still really can't figure out how the bar employee and owner weren't charged in this case they should have been defendants as well for not checking this girls id. but if the OP can't handle it it is better to dump him now, that way maybe he can find someone who will look past his mistakes.


Yes, you most certainly ARE being judgmental. It's her life, and her burden if she chooses to carry it. This doesn't affect you in the slightest, and here you are judging her for her decision. Being judgmental involves asking other people to carry burdens that you don't have to, just because YOU think it's right.

Where children are concerned, most intelligent people err on the side of caution. That is why everyone recommended - time after time after time - to get more information.

And guess what? She did. Nobody faults her for getting too much information because the STAKES are too high.

I'm glad you are overflowing with sympathy for someone you'll never meet, and you would prefer a woman you don't know make a decision that affects the rest of her life for no other reason than you feel this sympathy. But unless you have to carry the burden yourself, don't judge the people who do.
 Garofalo7
Joined: 9/14/2005
Msg: 123
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 10:37:33 AM
whenever you here the term, "Sex Offender"....a Child (3-9) pops into your head, when in reality, you could be labeled that for being 18 and you g/f being 17, it pretty much sucks, and yes, some 14 year olds do look like they are in their 20's. But I can't make that decision for you.
 smoochiegal
Joined: 5/18/2005
Msg: 124
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Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 11:22:43 AM
tell me how a 23 yr old doesn't know the difference between a 14 yr old and a bird of 18/19 yes some ppl look older than their age but come on the way she presented herself and things she spoke about or way she said things would have given a big indication. I'm also finding it hard to believe that if he was so oblivious to everything I'm sorry but unless I was drunk as a skunk and up for casual sex after a night out I think I would ask sum1 how old they were like that's one of the first questions u ask sum1 anyhow. How old are u what do u do for money, fun, hobbies etc. If he asked her her age just b4 sex then y couldn't he ask her age b4 doing anything else with her.

Well I have a child but as even a woman I would seriously have to think how much I liked that person to go there. yes u may have had big things going on in your life but do u really think that was something that could wait he should ahve told u b4 sleeping with u l(if he has) let alone till other things are calmer in your life maybe he ws hoping that if u spent time getting to know him it wouldnt seem so bad and that maybe he would have a fairer chance of staying with u... who knows. Then again u might come from a smallish place where everyone knows everything and ppl judge u on seeing him.

Hun at the end of the day you're only 22 yes be thankful he told u and take the easy life if you're life has been that up and down it's the last thing u need. How old is this guy anyway cos u were saying when he was 23. Good luck hope all works out tc :)

Hey just read about u saying in answer to sum about y do ppl think they know him better than u and ppl think he's a nonce. ppl don't know him but maybe feel they know ppl like him. I wouldn't outright call him an uncle fester for what he did as ppl especially men are a bit thick sumxs when it comes to attraction and women but u can't rule out the fact that he did other stuff with her and yet then asked her age b4 actual sex!!! Yes ppl do strange things sumxs I wouldn't say that he is a risk to your kids but if 100% u can stand by him for being honest and leave his past in his past that is up to u. I don't think u want ppl's opinions u want reassurance. But I know that inside u really have the answer to yout own question again tc xxx
 wollybully1234
Joined: 12/2/2005
Msg: 125
Registered Sex Offender?!?
Posted: 1/12/2006 3:11:14 PM
I dunno but he did meet her in a bar, how was he to know then how old she was. That I won't blame him for.

Why did he get in more trouble then a slap or probation. that I question.

Why he did not tell you upfront in the first place if it was realy no biggy.

Yeh stigma goes hand in hand with those regestered as sex offenders.
My olny advice would be if it's bothering you this much that your making a thread about it your more than likly torn, bwteen the nice guy and what hangs on his peter meter so to speak. Anything I would have to question over and over is not even worth it, cause later on down the road it will still be in your head and what sound relationship is that for you.

To all the men, like I've told my son, girls lie about the ages all the time, even if you meet them in a bar....they can get fake i.d, don't asked for I.D but there actual birth circtificate lol.
and he even made up his own document for them to sighn, stamped by the local cop station here. better to be safe than sorry.
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