| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:04:21 PM | I think its more about the connotation attached..
i have been used for sex.. or as i saw it anyway, most of us had at one point or other, doesn't mean we didn't enjoy the sex.. didn't mean we couldn't move forward in life. doesn't mean anything other then...
we didn't enjoy the feeling of giving up something like our pischka's without appreciation of at least some respectful contact afterwards!
now ... about the connotations...
a man... rarely ever takes u out to dinner, movies, or whatever else, and then tries getting u into the sack with the line "baby, i know we badly want each other in this moment, but u realise tomorrow i wont call u, u realise tonight is all its going to be... dont u?"
sometimes if a man is really honest.. might get more of what he wants with less hassles afterwards.
and usually after the night is over, he will use words like "call u tomorrow, lets catch up again... " in various ways that's said.
so if he go's home and then ignores u....
u saying thats not ego damaging for whatever reasons he didnt' want to talk again?
whyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy... are usually why u think that way. and u tend to think something is wrong with urself. bahhh... but thats me...
i guess my heart is still beating in this little ole chest of mine. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:24:28 PM |
It's all in the delivery
in the sex or the thank you??? | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:39:56 PM | Thanks for the info, Look in. :-)
As for Arri writing (msg.150), "I never boink anyone I don't want to see again" my question is, "How do you know until you boink? | |
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arri
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Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 154 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:51:04 PM | If I don't like the person, then why would I want to do her?
Boinking has never been my objective. I remain selective | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:53:55 PM | How would you know if you just met her in the bar?  .........ahhh, my younger days. Way before AIDS. | |
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arri
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Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 156 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 4:59:30 PM | It has happened 
As a matter of fact, I don't do online dating. Fortunately, the type of bars I go to ... have a regular crowd and I'd usually know her life history before taking her home 
Unless you mean Martini induced sex? we all know those are always fun and guilt free | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:29:14 PM | its the whole women can equate sex with a relationship [ or the possibility of one]
One scenario only - when they dont get the relationship they think is involved with themhaving had the sex with you, thats when they feel used.
The other most common scenario "to be used" is if someone LIED to them. If someone lied about their intentions/feelings/expectations to the woman to lead/convince her to that level of intimacy, then yes that is being used.
Dont think it has anything to do with the level of enjoyment. Well unless it was really bad and in that case dont worry it because she wont waste her time complaining to you about being 'used' or not cause she will be outta there
For the record a lot of women like/love sex. They just dont like being manipulated into it. | |
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arri
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Joined: 10/5/2005
Msg: 159 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:35:41 PM | Women are fully capable of detached sex ... it's just a question of control. Unless we are talking about a woman who came out of it feeling like a blow up doll ... and that's pretty sad
@ Shack
Exactly | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:47:45 PM | For the record a lot of women like/love sex. They just dont like being manipulated into it.
Then why do they? If I don't want to do something no one is going to manipulate me into it. If a woman allows herself to be manipulated into sex and then feel used the next day, that's her own fault not the guy's. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 6:51:07 PM | | I agree most women know if they give it up too easily or right away they have that big chance of being used. But men are crafty in playing games with the woman in making her believe that he would never do that etc. Sometimes I guess the woman doesn't want to lose the guy. But in the end the only one to blame is yourself for your own actions. | |
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osh42
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Joined: 10/18/2005
Msg: 162 | |
| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:00:52 PM | | Why is this whole thread on women being used for sex? What about guys being used for sex? Guys get used a lot too in that department. I know the media dictates it's a women only issue. It's not. What happen to saying no? What happen to it taking 2 to tangle? ;) | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:01:23 PM |
But men are crafty in playing games with the woman in making her believe that he would never do that etc.
Men are crafty in playing games? No some people are crafty in playing games, it goes both ways, just as many women play men as vice versa. Individuals have to decide for themselves if they want to be played or not, figure out if someoine is a player, before having sex, they're not hard to spot usually don't stick around long if they don't get what they want quick enough. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:17:15 PM | | ^^^ wow and you can type and read the forums at the same time eh? | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:18:32 PM | | she actually had a post there, must of edited it and erased it somehow. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:25:02 PM | | ^^^ who? The girl he's BEING used by? | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:30:01 PM | I think that “I was used for sex” only falls into place when someone lies and goes out of their way to insinuate or flat out say that they plan to see you again as in actually “dating” and they like you so much that sex just “naturally” takes place ….but once they’ve had sex they walk away and you never hear from them again...they weren’t really looking to date you at all, they merely wanted sex and didn't want to fly solo…
I don’t think that any mentally healthy person who has consensual sex later uses that term if they never go out again...it depends on what is said in the time period before sex happens…Of course you can’t get ‘used for dinner’: the implication for ‘dinner’ is that you both plan to eat and when you do, that part is over…if the implication is that “I really like you and plan to see more of you” but then he runs off after sex, then you can consider yourself ‘used for sex ONLY’….
And yes, women do this to guys all the time as well....same rules apply as above just in reverse...I think anyone doing that is despicable...if you only want a fling, say so...you'd be surprised how someone might take you up on it as opposed to you lying to them...I'm sure no one has EVER agreed to a one night stand and then said they ‘were used’ afterward, it's all in the presentation.....
And for all of you saying “Don’t let yourself be used” that’s a catch 22 …you don’t know you’ve been used until they use you…..they aren’t wearing any signs on their foreheads….they don’t tell you all the time they are seeing you and IM’ing you and calling you that “Hey, by the way, when I get my jollies, I’m done”….and no not all guys who walk away are doing that either, but they are many people who from the second they say “Hello”, are on one mission only…you just don’t know until the mission is over….. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:43:19 PM |
pischka's Was I absent in the 'relationships' class that day? | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:46:35 PM | who? The girl he's BEING used by?
Yes and she just stopped by to say thanks for the sex!!!!
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 7:46:39 PM | Yes men use women for sex
and yes at times women use men
(and i mean some)
Men say what women want to hear as a type of foreplay,
the more encouragement men give women the more eager the participation may be.
It's all in the game, some are more evil than others.
If you walk up to a women and say wanna fuk she will laugh at you.
If you wine and dine her and make her belief she is oh so everything, she will swallow you whole.
Now even if the sex is good men will still use them as they are not interested in the whole picture but hey sometimes you have to have sex.
At any point and time and don't be a chicken afterwards tactfully just say not interested.
The problem is maybe sometimes if men were more direct or honest with women, or maybe if they were just gentlemen this should never happen.
Fortunately for me I learned a long time ago to tell the difference between men and little boys. | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 8:43:49 PM | I have never been accused of using anyone,
but then again I let her make the first move,
I only hint or seduce | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 8:59:39 PM | | but if you only knew the lesson that I taught him, | |
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| Used for sex?
Posted: 1/12/2006 9:59:44 PM | hi whattheshack
I meant when someone lies to get you there by manipulate Perhaps deception would have been a better word. You dont have much control when if someone is lying to you.....Well if they are a good liar anyway
: ) | |
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