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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/12/2005 7:51:36 PM | | My luck is that I always find thes Greedy woman that don't mind me going down on them, but they will NOT give me head. or I can rub them them till they have their orgasm, then they'll tell me that their too tired to help me to orgasm. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 9:41:06 AM | "My luck is that I always find thes Greedy woman that don't mind me going down on them, but they will NOT give me head. or I can rub them them till they have their orgasm, then they'll tell me that their too tired to help me to orgasm."
Wow. Maybe we're seeing a new trend here. A little role reversal. That's the same complaint that women have had for years. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 9:57:23 AM | | I know a few girls who are reversing roles. One of my best friends will lie on her back while her man goes down on her. After she cums, she just lies there and lets him **** her. I think that really sucks. I wouldn't want to be her man in that situation. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 5:23:45 PM | | I had an old girlfriend that would ask me to "wake her up" by doing whatever I wanted. She was into being "used" like that, I guess. She would also ask me to "force" her, like she wanted to role play that I was some stranger trying to have my way with her. It was definitely different, but it was also kinda weird. She would often come up with kinky sh*t to do. She also had a lot of issues, but who doesn't... | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 6:10:06 PM | The Clit: More than just a little bump
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Much of the information in this article comes from The Clitoral Truth by Rebecca Chalker, a fascinating look at the anatomy and social history of women’s genitals. (Seven Stories Press, NY, 2000). $19.95.
Quick: What is the clitoris? And where is it? The standard view is that the clitoris is the little bump of erotically sensitive, orgasm-triggering tissue nestled above the vaginal opening in the fold of tissue where a woman’s inner vaginal lips meet.
Actually, the clitoris is much more than that. But unfortunately, for some 500 years, the clitoris has been minimized, misrepresented, and misunderstood. It’s time to rehabilitate the clitoris and see it for what it really is--an organ as large and multifaceted as the penis, just arranged a little differently.
Our term “clitoris” comes from the Greek “kleitoris,” meaning the female genitals--all of them, more than just the little nub we know as the clitoris today. The ancients knew more about the female genitals than many modern folks. One of the foremost ancient Greek physicians, Claudius Galen, said,“All parts that men have, women also have. The only difference is that in men, they are on the outside, in women, on the inside.” Modern anatomists have proved him correct, so correct, in fact, that we need a new term to describe the parts of the clitoris other than the little bump. Let’s call this collection female erotic body parts the “Clitoral System.”
Just as all parts of the penis and its surrounding tissue can become sexually aroused, the same goes for all parts of the Clitoral System. Many men would feel erotically short-changed if a lover focused only on the head (glans) of their penis and ignored the shaft, scrotum, and anal area. By the same token, many women feel short-changed when their lovers focus only on the clitoris and not the entire Clitoral System.
Embryologically, the penis and Clitoral System develop from the same germ cells. At eight weeks of fetal development, they appear virtually identical. The bump of the clitoris is the equivalent of the glans of the penis. But just as the penis is more than its head, the Clitorial System is more than the clitoris.
The clitoris holds some 7,000 sensory nerve endings, a greater concentration than any other structure in the body, and four times more than the glans of the penis. This concentration of sensory nerve endings makes the clitoris much more sensitive to touch than the penis. It’s the reason why many women feel discomfort, even pain, when their clitoris is fondled in any way other than very gently. Even when fondled gently, sometimes direct pressure on the little bump with a finger, tongue, penis, or sex toy is hard to take. There is nothing wrong with women who feel this way. If a woman has a super-sensitive clitoris, fondle AROUND it, not directly on it.
Under the clitoris, is another part of the Clitoral System, the clitoral shaft, analagous to shaft of the penis, only much smaller. Like the shaft of the penis, it’s filled with spongy erectile tissue. When women become sexually aroused, the clitoral shaft fills with blood and becomes longer and firm.
As the penis becomes erect, a ligament in the lower abdomen, the suspensory ligament, causes it to stick out or up. Women also have a suspensory ligament, which is part of the Clitoral System. It tightens during sexual arousal and retracts the flap of tissue that covers the clitoris, the clitoral hood, exposing the clitoris as it becomes erect.
The clitoral hood is analagous to the foreskin of the penis. Just as the foreskin retracts when the penis becomes erect (assuming it has not been removed by circumcision), the clitoral hood gets pulled upward by the tightening suspensory ligagment as a woman becomes sexually aroused, allowing the growing clitoris to become more prominent and visible.
The inner vaginal lips are also part of the Clitoral System. They correspond to the shaft of the penis. Like the penile shaft, the inner vaginal lips contain a great many nerve endings sensitive to erotic sensation. Some women say their inner lips are actually MORE erotically charged than their clitoris. The inner lips also contain some erectile tissue. As women becomes sexually aroused, the inner lips extend outward beyond the outer lips and separate, providing easier access to the sensitive area in between then, and to the vagina. Inner lips vary enormously in appearance: in color from pale pink to burgundy or even gray, in shape from thin and narrow, to fluted, to thick and fleshy. Some women feel self-conscious about theirs, thinking they don’t look like they “should.” But inner lips come in all shapes, sizes, and colors. In the words of noted sex educator Betty Dodson, a Xandria.com Advisory Board member and producer of the video, “Viva the Vulva,” the inner lips are snowflakes--all unique, all beautiful.
While men’s erectile tissue is concentrated in the shaft of the penis, women’s is distributed throughout the Clitoral System. A good deal of female erectile tissue occupies the area between the inner vaginal lips, particularly around urethral opening, about halfway between the clitoris and the vaginal opening. This area is known as the urethral sponge. When its erectile tissue becomes engorged with blood, it bulges somewhat and becomes firm. But the bulging is hardly visible externally between the vaginal lips. Instead, the urethral sponges bulges inward, causing a little mound in the front vaginal wall. This mound can be felt on the inside of the vagina, about two inches in from the vaginal opening. It’s the G-spot, yet another facet of the Clitoral System. But the G-spot isn’t really a spot. It’s the entire internal manifestation of the erotically aroused urethral sponge. It may be as large as a quarter coin.
Below the vaginal opening is the perineum, the little bridge of skin that separates the vagina from the anus. The perimeun abnd anus mark the lowest extent of the Clitoral System. Both can become very sensitive to erotic caresses, thanks to several muscles that surround the Clitoral System, the pelvic muscles. The most widely known of these is the pubococcygeus, or PC, the one that contracts when women or men squeeze out the last few drops of urine. The PC also contracts during orgasm. It’s the muscle strengthened with Kegel exercises, which increase the power and pleasure of orgasm. But in addition to the PC, there are also other pelvic muscles that form a figure-eight around the vaginal opening and anus. That’s why many women enjoy anal massage and fingering, and in some cases, intercourse. The musculature around the anus is part of the Clitoral System. (Men have a similar muscle arrangement in the anal area.)
Between the inner vaginal lips, around the female urethral opening are a group of tiny glands (the paraurethral glands) that in many women produce fluid similar to prostatic fluid on orgasm. Not all women produce this fluid, and among those who do, the amount produced varies from a few drops to considerably more. The fluid is female ejaculate, similar to male semen, except that it lacks sperm.
What of the outer vaginal lips? They develop from same embryonic tissue as the scrotum in men. They are not part of the Clitoral System, just as the scrotum is not part of the penis. However, the outer lips are just as erotically excitable as the scrotum.
One more area between women’s legs is NOT part of the Clitora System. Oddly enough, it’s the vagina. The vast majority of people consider the vagina a key female sex organs, sometimes, the only one. But it isn’t--except to the extent that the G-spot is accessible through it. For women, the vagina is a reproductivbe organ. However, it’s a sex organ for MEN because it receives the penis during intercourse. Vaginal intercourse certainly provides many women with sensual pleasure. Intercourse produces some indirect stimulation to the various parts of the Clitoral System. It allows the woman and her lover to share a special intimacy, and many women enjoy the sensation of being deeply penetrated, and holding the man’s erection inside them. Nonetheless, the vagina is more of a sex organ for men than for women.
As early as 500 B.C., Chinese and Indian sex treatises mentioned female ejaculation, and from ancient Greek times to the 18th century, the penis and Clitoral System were considered to be equivalent organs in all aspects, except their arrangement. Then, after 1700, the concept of male-female genital and sexual equivalence began changing. Over the next few centuries, physicians and anatomists increasingly viewed women as “less sexual” than men, and came to deny the very existence of the Clitoral System, until by Victorial times in the late 19th century, women were viewed as not sexual at all, but merely as the passive recipients of men’s lust. The clitoris was reduced to the little nub the term connotes today. Sigmund Freud went so far as to tout the completely erroneous notion that only immature, neurotic women have “clitoral orgasms,” while mature, mentally healthy women have “vaginal orgasms.”
What accounted for this debasement of women’s sexuality? No one really knows. Feminists say it had to do with the rise of modern obstetrics and gynecolkogy, when male physicians seized control of women’s medicine--and bodies--from midwives. Some historians contend that the change reflected the rise of the modern industrial state, the transition from men and women working side by side as approximate equals in agriculture to a division of labor with men as breadwinners and women as homemakers. Whatever the case, the ancients’ appreciation of the Clitoral System faded.
It was not until the mid-20th century that William Masters, M.D., and Virginia Johnson refuted Freud’s notion of the vaginal orgasm, and began to restore the clitoris to its rightful place in women’s sexuality. But they did not fully connect it to the Clitoral System. It wasn’t until the 1980s that sex researchers Beverley Whipple, Ph.D. and John Perry, Ph.D, documented female ejaculation and the G-Spot, both of which still remain controversial. And it’s only in the past decade that researchers have come to appreciate the full extent of the Clitoral System.
As a result, most people still view the clitoris as the little bump tucked under the apex of women’s inner vaginal lips. The full extent of the Clitoral System has yet to become fully repopularized, despite the fact that both the male and female genitals develop from the same germ cells and, despte their different arrangements, have the very similar structures.
Where is the clitoris? It encompasses the entire vulva, from the clitoral hood to the anus, and has surprisingly little to do with the vagina. And why are so many women sexually frustrated, nonorgasmic, and unfulfilled. Perhaps because they and their lovers don’t fully appreciate the wonder and beauty of the Clitoral System. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 6:17:50 PM | i have posted the link to the above article in at least two other forums, but not many actually took the trouble to read it. i really wish this info was common knowledge. it would save women and men a lot of frustration. i completely agree that women need to be more responsible for their own orgasms, not that men should be lazy, but that they shouldn't have to do all the work. sex is supposed to be something you do WITH someone, not TO someone.
bulldog, i am actually starting to like you. you sound like you attract some weird b!tches, but then again, so do i. hoping my luck is actually taking a turn for the better. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 7:21:53 PM | Wow,
You don't know very much about female sexuality/anatomy, do you??
I think it's pretty much all been said before, but it boils down to communication BOTH ways. Women need to tell their men what they want/need, and men need to actually listen and take it to heart. There is one thing I want to tell women that hasn't been said so far in this thread; most guys know it, at least instinctively, but I don't think that many women do. And that is this:
We men like to view ourselves as competent at what we do, whatever that may be. When men evaluate other men in order to determine how much we respect them, a large part of that is based on how competent we think they are in general. This carries over into the bedroom, where the sad truth of the matter is that some men (boys, really) let their egos override everything else. They don't like to be told that they're doing something wrong, especially when it's something as fundamental to 'manhood' as pleasing the woman he's with. So what does this mean for you if he's not doing what it takes? You have to talk to him in a non-judgemental manner. Actually, I think it's best that you talk *before* you have sex and agree that you will both guide the other to do what you like. If you come to an agreement beforehand, then it takes the threat of 'failure' away from the guy, and he will more than likely be extremely receptive to what you're saying. Try it with the next person you're with; I'm confident you won't be disappointed.
I, like most guys, have talked about sex with a lot of my male friends. The vast majority of them genuinely want to satisfy their women (either because they love them and/or because they want to get invited back!) but some of them just don't have a clue how. If you find yourself with a guy who doesn't give a sh*t if you have an orgasm or not, you may want to refine the decision-making process you use when deciding who to invite into your bedroom... | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 7:31:09 PM | yer welcome, bulldog. see- i'm not ALWAYS a b!tch....
to the other guy above bulldog, yes i do know a lot about anatomy in general. i'm a paramedic, so i kinda have to. expert on female anatomy because i happen to have some, and have explored it thoroughly, although i didn't write that article.
soulll, what are you talking about. sounds like you have been traumatized in some way. if you want a response you will have to give some details, because no one knows what you are talking about. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 7:57:06 PM | Sidheanwwyn,
I guess it didn't come through; it is obvious that your knowledge of female anatomy is far above average. I meant it as a joke.  | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 8:49:41 PM | Cheers to you, Sid! I never thought you were a b*tch. I'm not always an ***hole, either. We just might be too outspoken for our own good. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 8:57:14 PM | What's a mans idea of foreplay?
A half hour of begging.
What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying?
The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
Breasts don't have eyes.
Why do black widow spiders kill their males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
Why don't men have mid-life crises?
They stay stuck in adolescence.
How does a man show he's planning for the future?
He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
How is being at a singles bar different from going to the circus?
At the circus the clowns don't talk.
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog?
After a year, the dog is still excited to see you.
Why is sleeping with a man like a soap opera?
Just when it's getting interesting, they're finished until next time.
How do you get a man to exercise?
Tie the TV remote control to his shoelaces.
How many men does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
One. Men will screw anything.
Why do woman rub there eyes in the mourning?
Because they don't have balls. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/13/2005 11:50:22 PM | Hi ...
First let me tell u that u r too good with detailed explanations.
U said:
Women and men both have an organ that brings them sexual pleasure, for men it is the penis and for women it is the clitoris. (Now, vaginal stimulation is nice also and can bring a woman a lot of intense pleasure, but the pleasure is more similar to what men feel when their prostate gland is stimulated.)
1) Clitoris can bring pleasure to women and make them reach orgasm but most (if not all) women find vaginal stimulation more pleasurable than just clitoral stimulation (hence the use of dildos and sex toys instead of only stimulating her clitoris). But again to attain orgasm only from vaginal stimulation takes too long and a man has to control reaching orgasm till the time she cums (which is very rare and possible with men who take sex as an art)
2) The G-Spot ofcourse. Women who have experienced the G-Spot bliss.. will always love it that way. As I mentioned earlier, it is possible for men who love to explore and take sex as an art to make their woman reach orgasm.
I know most men get a kick, a sexual high by knowing that his woman is enjoying every bit of the sexual act and has reached orgasm (I do)
3) For guys who have not:
- Work on foreplay and oral (its quite ok). Foreplay need not be artificial. It comes naturally if u just wish rather than just being ready to F**K. Use the sense of touch, feel her, caress her, kiss her. For guys who can, it will take time but it will work wonders.
- Oral is the best thing to make her reach half way (get her half exited). It can be anything from working ur mouth on her brests to licking her body curves (neck, ears, and slowly sliding downwards to her clitoris. (There are still some men who are not comfortable with working oral on the clitoris - can still do with the brests. Remember breasts can also give immense pleasure to a woman if used ur mouth on creatively. This pleasure is different from her vaginal pleasure and can arouse her very well).
This all can give her the sexual pleasure and wetness and heat that otherwise she would normally attain during intercourse and by the time she is ready and enjoying u r out)
- Work ur a***. Intercourse can be much more than just pushing it in and taking it out a couple of times or more.
 It is sad that biologically a man is made such that he can reach orgasm three times much faster than a woman.
It is also sad that biologically a man is made such that once he reaches orgasm the penis looses its stiffness whereas for a woman - the vagina is still there and wet even after she reaches orgasm.
A man can be inside a woman till the end of the shaft of his erect penis and keep moving his a*** forward and sideways while pressing in and releasing pressure to give that vaginal stimulation and indirect stimulation to the clitoris. This will give the woman extreme pleasure and will also help him not reach orgasm cause the rim on the tip of his penis is not being rubbed. If the man is observant he will know where to reach the G-spot soon enough with this act.
Again a man if observant he will know when his woman is abt to cum and during that time he can use the conventional method of intercourse by repetitions of taking his penis almost out and then pushing it in again. This gives immense pleasure at the peak of orgasm and both may reach orgasm at the same time.
BEER - To have delayed orgasms and to maintain erectness even after reaching orgasm, alcohol can do wonders. A male can consumes wine or beer only enough to give him a slight high (before the sexual act). This will help him reach orgasm late and also maintain erection for sometime after he reaches orgasm. In this case he can carry on with his conventional intercourse style (in and out and in again after reaching the first orgasm) which will give him stiffness after about 3 to 5 minutes and the second orgams can be much much delayed. This can make his woman reach orgasm multiple times and can be the best part of love making.
MEN DO REMEMBER, IT HAS BEEN A MALE DOMINATED SOCIETY AND MANY OR MOST WOMEN STILL FEAR REJECTION AND LATER ABUSE IF ASKED FOR MORE SEXUAL SATISFACTION THAN PROVIDED BY HER MAN. IF U WISH TO HAVE THE BEST OF SEX LIFE, TAKE INITIATIVE AND KEEP ASKING WHAT SHE LIKES (DO THINGS AND CONFIRM IF IT IS LIKED AND PLEASE STOP DOING WHAT IS NOT LIKED BY HER BUT IS PLEASURABLE TO U)
Bobby | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/14/2005 3:41:27 AM | As quoted in Chasing Amy " I'm like an air traffic controller, waving this way, and that".
If guys listen to what i say, I get mine and I make double sure he gets his. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/14/2005 7:37:19 AM | Bobby and Sid, you have both taught me a lot. Thank you so much. This is such a great thread.
I wanted to clarify that I didn't mean to imply that the clitoris was the only place that a women feels pleasrue. I think that just like men, we like a variety of stimulation. If a woman were to focus on the man's head alone, he would probably not enjoy it as much as if we spead the stimulation to his shaft, testicles, inner thighs, stomach, and so on. What I weas mainly saying is that men often ignore the clitoris and focus on the vagina and that it is up to women to explain how they like to be touched. I think that is EXACTLY what we are doing here SID, explaining how we like to be touched. WONDERFUL. Bravo!!!! | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/15/2005 10:33:07 AM | Going through some of these posts here and on other subjects have me thinking.
I would like some handsome hunk to give me a butt rub and slowly pull my panties down till they're off of me. And then softly tickle the inside of my thighs. Just rubbing them ever so softly. Small kisses up the small of my back up to my neck would not hurt at all. Some baby powder applied by some very strong hands at that time would also be nice. I love the smell of baby powder, even on men.
I will finish this later.
I know I will be happy happy: applause:happy!!! | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/15/2005 2:07:07 PM | " For females, the same organ stays very small and remains as a 'clitoris'."
I'm not sure if anyone has corrected this, but the female organ is as long as an average penis. It goes from the clitoris, inside to the vaginal walls, known as the g-spot. We think of them as two seperate things, but they are connected. | |
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| Reality of Female Sexual Satisfaction
Posted: 1/16/2005 12:17:24 PM | What Nickel said: I maintain that faking an orgasm is essentially the same thing as lying, and a huge breach of trust. If you are performing this most intimate of acts, and your partner can't even be honest with you, then it usually is a large indication that there is much kept hidden in the relationship.
I agree 100%. Any woman that does that- and then complains that she is not satisfied is an idiot. That is worse that inefficient or no communication. That is sending false communications.
BUt I also agree with those who think a "little" faking is good once in a while - like if she doesn't feel like it but fakes "hot" to make her partner come. THAT is being considerate.
BUT afterwards (so as not to leave false information behind) she should say htat she did htat just for him. And any man who doesn't realize that that means she cares enough to have tdoe that for him- and he should now say thanks, I appreacisted it and I love you even more - - - then he is an idiot.
Last thing to InthePinkFL who started this thing - good posts. Are you getting enough for an article? Also- you really are cute!
Evan6 | |
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