| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/16/2006 7:51:54 PM | Mo. Im glad u arnt gonna harden heart because of this, this is exactly what i was thinking when i was readin ur post. I thought OMG!!! this poor guy is gonna think the worst n this is gonna make him upset with women for a bit, then I thought OMAN!! N she had to be Canadian gr8. (hoping that maybe other men on this site wont read that n think that all Canadian women are like this), But needless to say, Im happy with the way u think, because we all reap what we sow, Ur one of them men that we would call a good guy from what i gather so far n NO they dont always finish last. Keep ur spirits up it will all pay off.
xoxox | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/16/2006 7:54:47 PM | I think it's a problem of a lot of people out there.. men and woman who are "flaky".. don't know what they want even if it hits them between the eyes. Instead of being upfront they flake out and disappear....
I just wish they had some kind of badge that said "I am a Flake, STAY AWAY" would save me a lot of time and trouble.. afterall I know what I want and can be adult and courteous about it. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/16/2006 8:09:39 PM | Ok now I know people are going to hate me for what I am about to say but I'm used to it around here so here goes:
First off I'm sorry that this romance made in binary land ended so anticlimactically but as the saying goes the higher the climb the longer the fall....or something like that!?!?
Secondly this is hardly the WORST story I will ever hear LOL
Lastly when two people with a match made in "fantasyland" decide to meet for the first time in the same town it is a gamble. When two people decided to meet in two completely different cities the stakes are even higher, obviously there is soooo much more to risk. People meet for the first time for "a" date and the next day they go back to their normal lives. But in a long distance situation as in this particular case, having to entertain someone or having to rely on another to be entertained in a foreign town for a few days, is a lot to ask of a person.
Spending two or three dates in a row with someone you just met is TOO much! I don't know too many people that would want that much that soon. But it seems people wanna be in love so badly that they take big risks and overlook the obvious!
So maybe for this woman the feeling was not mutual, is she to keep up the fascade only to let you down three or four days later? It's too much to ask of someone. And it's not easy to say to someone "I really like talking to you but I am not attracted to you!"
The bottom line is people wanna believe that attraction will be different because of a connection made online, well it's NOT. We still have to feel attracted on a very basic level. So unless you can accept this then maybe you should not be spending so much time, emtional investement and money on something completely fantastical.
Let's face it, expecting to fall in love with someone we have never met before because we travel countries to see them, is pretty darn whimsical! And a hell of a lot to ask out of life and another human being. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/16/2006 8:19:59 PM | | You can get all the right signals from someone online, but only when you meet in person will you get a more real vibe. It sounds like for whatever reason, she just wasn't as into you as much as she thought she was initially. It could have been worse. You made the best of your time there, so just chalk it up to experience. I got stood up at the airport once for someone who didn't show up, later with an excuse of gall stones. Oh well. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/16/2006 8:46:52 PM | I agree that something like this can be too much too soon, but as I have stated over and over, we both agreed in advance that if we weren't attracted to each other or feeling "it," we would still have fun sightseeing.
I would not go on ANY date, long distance or not, expecting that sparks are going to fly and all will be rosey.
However, I had every reason to expect that, at the very least, we would end up being friends and having fun. If she hadn't been gung-ho for this, I wouldn't have gone. If she hadn't been very excited about me coming out and OFFERED to play tour guide, I wouldn't have gone.
If she had exhibited any sign of being flaky or insincere, I wouldn't have gone.
What can I say, she surprised the hell out of me! People can do that under stress. She just handled it poorly.
And for those of you going on and on about my cell phone, IT WORKED. I was conserving the battery and only turned it on to make calls and check messages. She knew this and could have called anytime, I would have gotten a voicemail.
As far as her side of the story goes, as I've said, she is more than capable of chiming in if she wants to.
She apologized to me in an email and admitted she was awful, that's about it. | |
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| THEY BOTH FORGIVE EACHOTHER!!! THREAD CLOSED!!
Posted: 1/16/2006 9:37:10 PM | I mentioned the email earlier, you know, in one of those posts you didn't read before expressing your opinion.
That is a far cry from forgiving her.
However, since you consider the thread closed, I cordially invite you to stop posting in it! | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 9:04:10 AM | | Thanks for support MandaInLondon. My name is Phil, Zaney is the name of the person who did this to me. Would you believe that she is a pyschologist? Did I spell that right? LOL. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 9:47:18 AM | | Mo Jo LA,,What a story,,the best part about it is your ending coment,,the way u handled it,,u seem to be a true ROMANTIC,,,,i GUESS WE HAVE TO GO THROUGH SAD STORIES TO APPRECIATE THE WONDERFUL ONES,,EVEN MORE...I have had several chances to go out of state to meet someone,,but I have feared the same thing can happen to me...Your story really touched me,,i wish u will have a HAPPY story next time.....You seem to be a real nice man... SUNNY | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 9:51:48 AM | Stories like this are why I have a 1 hour driving rule about meeting people from online.
I have gone longer distances to meet people, but I've always had another reason to be going, and I generally had family or friends to hang out with . | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 12:03:17 PM |
Thanks for support MandaInLondon. My name is Phil, Zaney is the name of the person who did this to me. Would you believe that she is a pyschologist? Did I spell that right? LOL.
Sorry Phil. I thought u had signed off at the end of your thread! Well, know I now :o)
I have to laugh cuz I'm going to begin to study psychology for the next 6 years! OH NO! I can't believe Zaney is one! Thats makes it bad for all the good psychologists or soon to be psychologists out there. The latter being me! U did spell it right ;o) | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 12:19:37 PM | | This is why I am going out to the streets and meeting people face to face. grocery shopping etc. Get off these internet sites my friends and lets cone our social skills again. Go Go leave, let this message be the last one you ever read. Good luck, bye. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 3:10:25 PM | This must have been the 4th date or so:
Went to stay at his to meet his son who was 6. Got ignored for almost a week, got left with his 6 year old in the kitchen while he played games and said it wasnt that he wasnt talking to me, he just didnt want company. Now if that was so, why did he invite me round?
I get night terrors and while in the midst of quietly crying he comes in shouting, wakes his son up and blames me. He scares the heck out of me doing so. I leave the next morning, not talking to him at all.
He was such a sweetheart before then too!
Doesnt take them long to show their true colours! | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 4:26:55 PM | I'm glad that I spelled it right, that was more luck than judgement.
Evidently I am not the only one she has done this to. She criticised all her previous boyfriends, been married 3 times, always the other persons fault. Now isn't that remarkable? I should have seen the red flags, unfortunately I chose to ignore them, my own fault.
Let' s us keep in touch, you seem great to talk to | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 6:26:51 PM | | Not a nice lady. Maybe she was still married? I think your first big clue should have been her (very strange) willingness to bring her child on a "date" with you. That is just plain dumb. Who would do that? "I don't know anything about you, but let's hang out with my kid." Just after a free meal? I don't get that one. | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 6:41:45 PM | Wow...that is a really sad story. I'm so sorry that happened to you...doesn't make us Canadians look good at all, but believe me when I tell you that I don't know anyone who would do that...just terrible!
If it was me, and even if things did not look like they were gonna pan out, I would have still been your friend and toured you around. Hell, whats a couple of days out of a persons life to make even a stranger happy!
Don't give up hope, you just had a bad experience.
Come to Ontario, we are nice here! LOL | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 6:45:01 PM | It happens. Yes you are right, you can only hope for the best. Dont let it put you off dating because it will be the right thing eventually
To be honest the fact that someone didnt have anything organised with that much notice for someone coming such a long way is a big RED STOP sign to me
To be even more honest, she sounds married !!! The ahmming and ahhhing were most likely she was tryng to work around her husbands schedule. She didnt know what he was doing so couldnt tell you. She was probably hassling him to let her know hes movements so she could sneak out etc. What tells me that? the fact she couldnt message/call you in advance of standing you up. She couldnt contact you cause he was in the room/ at home/ near vicinity
Sorry but it is nice to see someone who puts in such an effort. Keep it up, you will get the right circumnstances one day !! | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 6:45:12 PM | Im sorry to hear about the bad experience many of you have had.
Ever the optimist I am..... I just have to say I met a guy from here the first tme this past weekend... yes I crossed one state line... we both drove about 3 hours to meet and OHHHHH MYYYYYYY..... it was quite a successful meeting!
Just don't blow off everyone due to one bad experience is all I'm saying... never give up!  | |
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 8:54:16 PM | I could say that I was turned off by the woman in the cell phone store who refused to let me pay to have my phone charged because she wanted me to BUY the charger... or the girl at the crepe restaurant who insisted they could not put egg, cheese and sausage in a crepe, or the fact that I was asked for money every 30 seconds by homeless people... but I won't say any of those things.
Instead, I'll just say I loved the energy of the city and it reminded me very much of being home in NY... the food was great... I met some cool people dancing at the Tokyo Lounge Saturday night... was thrilled that the city was alive past 10pm... and found some great record stores.
Buddy, you had my support until this part.
You strike me as being either really clueless, or a combination of needy, self-centred, and wanting everybody to bend over backwards for you.
Imagine the lady in the cell phone store wanting you to buy something. Go figure. You could afford to blow hundreds of dollars to go to Vancouver on a whim to meet someone from the f***ing internet, and you won't buy a charger that just might save you some grief?
Your homeless people comment leads me to believe that in addition to being needy and self-centred, you're also an arrogant, sheltered suburbanite or trendy condo clone.
And don't go to a creperie if what you really want is a sausage mcmuffin. Geez.
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 9:11:35 PM | Hey Mojo Whiner:
You land in the most beautiful and friendly city in the world, where every second woman on the street is at least a 8..... most are near a 10 or even more.... she read your sorry ass like a book and skated you rather than bounce you hard.
You can't bounce .... shift gears go with the flow.... ???
If you are going to be jacked up anywhere, you want to be jacked up in this town.... :)
If you can't make a few cracked eggs into a tasty omlet in this town, you got a long ways to go. 
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| The WORST Plenty Of Fish story you will EVER hear
Posted: 1/17/2006 9:43:24 PM | I live in Vancouver - many women here are like that. The more east you travel
the better they get. As proof, I'm dating long-distance with someone
from down south so.
I bet she has a bag full of apologies. | |
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