| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 1:57:36 PM | Totally agree.
For me marriage without sex would be like marriage without dating. Even if someone seemed perfect in every way outside of the bedroom, if they just weren't on the same wavelength as me a marriage could never work. Too often it seems sex is an underrated part of relationships. | |
|
Ooli
|
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 177 | |
| |
Ooli
|
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 178 | |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 2:28:27 PM | This is a complex question that women don’t really want the answer to and men don’t want to tell.
ben1man :
First off, the OP is a man.
Secondly, most women value sex in a relationship as highly as men.
Thirdly, your post seems to be saying that men put their penis above all else. I find that really sophomoric and I just don't buy it. Some men are willing to commit to something greater than just their libido. Yes, they want sex. Yes, it's damn important to them. Yes they want to have a relationship so they can get it all the time. All things being equal, they should be able to. But, the orgasm isn't the only reason they want the companionship of a woman; there are other things of equal importance.
Fourth, the sex in any relationship will eventually dry up if the person behind the vagina or penis is not valued as a whole person. They must be cherished, loved, trusted and appreciated. If you make your woman feel like a whore, you can forget about her taking your little guy for a ride.
Fifth, making a moral decision to abstain until married is a personal choice. It is not about a lack of trust in the relationship. It is about living your life with values. If someone chooses to abstain, all the more power to them. | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 2:42:00 PM | i think it would be cool to actually be able to do that. to hold out and the desire. there would be no question in my mind the sex, well it would be love making by then, but it would be soo intense and so soul shattering that it would only make the bond stronger.
But in todays day, i don't think they could hold out because of the easyness of getting some is always just around the corner. But yano what they say! love conquers all eh! I think it would be amamzing tho. I don't know if i could. but if i knew, i might try. | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 2:42:05 PM |
There is very little that you can know about a person's sexual abilty that requires having sex.In fact there may be alot MORE you can learn about them from waiting a few months.
My point exactly!
Now, my question is: If you go out with different men and have sex with each one of them, doesn't that make you a whore? What is the difference between a prostitute and a serial dater? The money? Because at the end they are using the same thing: their ass.
 | |
|
| |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 3:09:44 PM | Some of us don't equate our sexuality with monetary value.
Some of us recognize that sexuality and morality are mutually exclusive.
Some of us recognize that what is right for us would not be right for other people and wouldn't want anyone to violate their own belief system.
Some of us would respect the choices you make for yourself as long as you don't try to shove your choices down our throats or try to tell us we are somehow "less than".
Some of us do NOT want to be married and we don't equate our self-worth with our marital status.
Some of us do not use antiquated terms like "used" or "slut" because we own our choices and our sexuality.
Some of us are quite content with being "alone" and wouldn't want it any other way. | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 3:24:13 PM | | The test drive theory is rediculous and is something only the modern american man would say. In layman's language that's called f*** em and chuck em. The fact is once upon a time waiting till marriage to have sex was the traditional and accepted way. And it was also stressed to be a virgin on the wedding day. If that was such a big deal then none of us would be here today. Since the truth is marriages lasted way longer with way fewer divorces in those days. I have no clue what people mean by "sexually compatible". The penis goes in the vagina, how more compatible do you need to be? | |
|
| |
Ooli
|
Joined: 12/17/2005
Msg: 185 | |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 3:37:10 PM | Just realized how one of my above points might have been misinterpreted. I don't mean that choosing to abstain means you have values and not abstaining means you don't. lol I mean that any choice you make is one based on your own individual values and not because you don't trust someone, as the poster I was responding to seemed to be intimating.
gothygeek: I really liked what you had to say. Very eloquently put. | |
|
| |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 4:40:00 PM | And anyways once her fantasys over and the dress Is packed away - what happens 3 years down the track when reality hits and she starts wondering what Its like to be with others??
That is if you have been with a ton of "others".
Look darls how meny men Ive been with IS NO ONES business - but its well under 10 thanks and I think you ASSume a lot with no valid reason too - Im 37 - all my guys bar 1 have been ltr - years not weeks not months ... Im not a serial dater or a " prostitute" but I arnt going to marry a man I havent slept with - BIG BLOODY DIFFERENCE!!!
You are carrying on like as If someone states they like sex with a man they love they are some Net Pony hanging out on a sex site for all to have a ride on - LET IT GO 
And waiting months - no problems - marrying without having sex? BIG PROBLEM TO ME - what you do Is your call frankly Its not my problem - but I arnt making a life commitment without knowing that side.. but dont assume that means I **** 10 a year or date 500 as thats Ignorant and a woman who chooses to have sex before marriage Is not a whore - put away your stones - someone may choose to have sex before marriage and have been with 3 men for all you know as they were 6 , 7 & 5 year relationships - theres tooo many variables for anyone to make personal judgements on someone saying they like sex - liking sex and ****ing anyone who Is willing to **** them are 2 diff things..
And anyways If thats what they wanna do - more power to them - Its just against my personal morals and religious beliefs
Im a White Occultist white but anyone with a laymans knowledge knows we DONT sleep around - but we do like sex - we wait untill we SEEM to have the full package with a partner - I say seem as obviously my 7 yr ect SEEMED .. but hey If It was I wouldnt be here ..
Another Interesting fact ... why are you all here the ones trashing us for having had sex and admitting to like It with past partners If you'd been so right with your choices?? I dont mean the young ones here - but theres an awfull lot of oldies like moir getting Into the debate - marraige Is for life Isnt It... so why are you here? Cause obviously that choise wasnt so damn bloody fine or youd still be with them  | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 4:47:24 PM | | look the way i sse it is this i dont know any woman who already had sex would wait till marriage. she already had sex and im sorry those hormones are going to catch up with her i would respect the fact that she wants to try not to have sex till marriage and i will stick around and wait if i really have felins for her but i know all to well will be having sex befor we tie the nott. | |
|
| |
| |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 5:02:37 PM | | I couldn't wait. I think you need to know how well you interact in bed before marraige. I've met women that I got along great with, but in bed, they don't do a thing for me, or, I for them. If you can have great sex with someone you really like/love/connect with, then you have something, sex is a big part of a relationship, no matter what anyone says, otherwise, one, or both of you might be disappointed later. That "waiting until marraige stuff" sounds good on sunday morning in church, But in the real world it isn't feasible. | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 5:08:17 PM | My point exactly!
Now, my question is: If you go out with different men and have sex with each one of them, doesn't that make you a whore? What is the difference between a prostitute and a serial dater? The money? Because at the end they are using the same thing: their ass.
Has anyone here ANYONE said they had to bend over the coffee table each time they met a man for coffee?? Shows your mentality no one elses - everyone else can date without having to take a slice of the action with each person they meet!
This Is getting ridiculous - people date - date means meet to see if they like the person on a net site 99 out of 100 dates will never go past coffee... this Is a dating site not a sex site for swingers .. but even If It was and thats what they choose to do - as long as their partners In the same mind set I hope they have a long happy life with It - we are all different and although you may not approve of a life style - thats OK as they arnt gonna force you Into It - live and let live 
So Im a whore In your opinion - sweet I can honestly say Ive never been on a dating site whilst Im with a partner - can you? HAHA and dont jump on It I know you are married and looking for " friends" female ones seen It In another post - but there u go - ASSume a lot and you get a lot wrong but you know whatever - get back to me In 6 years time and I wouldnt waste your time looking for friends on a pick up site - seems Illogical especially when theres so MANY places you can meet people with the same Interests on the net ... whats the saying ?? Me thinkith thou protest too much  | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 5:18:07 PM | Just realized how one of my above points might have been misinterpreted. I don't mean that choosing to abstain means you have values and not abstaining means you don't. lol I mean that any choice you make is one based on your own individual values and not because you don't trust someone, as the poster I was responding to seemed to be intimating.
Ooli your making valid points and being fair to to both sides of the argument - Im not trying to Intimade anyone and I have taken offense at nothing you've said ( In case It was me you were worried about haha ) but I wont sit back and be classed as a whore haha I will defend my position - but you have spoken your mind and there's nothing wrong with that - the whole Idea of the thread was to get peoples varied opinions on the subject and you havent personally attacked anyones morals In the slightest - you are putting a point across as you see It and thats the Beauty of life - the fact we all have the right to do that and different mind sets on things
I have taken no offense to anything you have said - you have handled yourself beautifully to defended your points - as should be.
I was jumping down the throuts of those who assume as someone has not waited untill middle age to have sex In marraige they are a serial dating ho cause thats plain silly and offensive to 99% of the females In the world today. | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 5:42:44 PM | | i'M A WOMAN AND IF i WERE TO TELL SOMEONE THAT I WANT TO WAIT TO HAVE SEX TILL I GOT MARRIED IT WOULD BE TO FIRST CHECK OUT THE OTHER COMPATIBILITIES NOW IF I SAW THAT THE CHEMISTRY WAS GOOD BETWEEN MYSELF AND THAT PERSON AND THAT WE WOULD BE A GREAT MATCH THEN BY ALL MEANS I WANT IT TOO. | |
|
| |
| |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 8:12:07 PM | Storm ... Read all your posts on this subject.. I think you have hit the nail on the head everytime you have swung the hammer.. Anyway, just a shout out. Love your outlook on this thread. Couldn't have said any of it better myself. *High Five* or *Low Five*  Look forward to hearing what you have to say more often. See ya round ;) | |
|
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 8:37:48 PM | Some of my thoughts on this.
Why wait all the way until the wedding date? I feel that the time of engagement to marry is a good starting point for further intimacy. It's a special turning point in the relationship in which the couple has agreed to a lifetime commitment, but if the sexual issues are seriously incompatible, you are out wedding costs rather than the worse hassle of a divorce.
To me sexuality is a deep bonding that is special and should not be taken lightly. I've seen for the most part that sex very early in a relationship has often been problematic. But when a couple is planning to spend the rest of their lives together (ie. engaged) I think that is a great starting point, at least for first intercourse. Then the sexual act has deeper meaning and is a very special part of that loving relationship. As for the other activities, that is up to each couple to decide, and a bit off topic.
This is really an issue that each couple needs to decide for themselves, regardless of what other people think. | |
|
| |
| GUYS!!! If you met the right woman, could you wait for the sex till marriage?
Posted: 1/24/2006 10:56:58 PM | Stormflower not offense, but what country are you from? I cannot understand the way you write.
NO offense taken as It was so obviously not meant to be ( yer right ) .... AUSTRALIA - Its this small backward Country In the never nevers where women have sex sometimes, and speak whats on our mind - we dont pretty It up with Bullshit and hide Insults - we tell It how It Is - And say It to the person straight - you should look us up online sometime!!
Not offense ? Or not meaning to be offensive?
Neither was taken especially when you couldnt write one simple line without error. | |
|
Home
login 
