Tarika
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Joined: 8/30/2006
Msg: 26 | |
| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/16/2007 8:54:05 PM | | Aren't we all grown up here? If it feels right do it....if a guy is going to stick, he will regardless if sex is on the first, second or third date. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/16/2007 9:07:18 PM |
Aren't we all grown up here?
ROFLMAO! Haven't you been looking around at all? (I'd say the answer is "no")
If it feels right do it
Ok, I'm not seeing how that fits with being grown up. Seems a bit immature to me. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/16/2007 9:32:10 PM | The problem is not the sex, the problem is how it skews your thinking... suddenly you can overlook his flaws -- maybe really big ones -- because now you feel "bonded". You rush things along faster than you would have otherwise, infact when you found he lived with his mother you'd have dumped his ass... but now you've got this history and you realize when he gets a job eveything will be fine. He's got you now... he'll change.
Makes the whole thinking part fly out the window.
Or, after that first date you're so embarrassed you never return his calls again. (this is what they refer to as "poof") | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/16/2007 9:35:55 PM | | Why in the world would you want to have sex with somone you have just met and dont know well? Sex is for marriage. If you really want a relationship, work on it. Get to know the person. Respect them. Respect yourself. Only by spending time with the person will you get to know if this is the kind of person you want to have a relationship with. Another word to the wise. Having sex on the first date is a great way to expose yourself to AIDS, VD, and a pregnancy. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/16/2007 10:04:49 PM |
If you give up the goods too quickly
Shudder. There's just something about "the goods" that isn't right. Perhaps it because it sounds like merchandise?
there is nothing for the man to crave or desire
Unless he craves and desires you for more than just sex. (It could happen!) | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 3/17/2007 4:57:20 AM | | I've met some people that had an amazing magnetic energy... it was almost like electricity sparking off of them. I think that when someone makes THAT much of a first impression that, if I was capable of any intellectual though, it would be prudent of me to wait... if only to reflect and make sure I wasn't blinded by the sheer strength of the magnetism. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/21/2007 10:56:31 PM | hmm sex on first date...
First no expectations is always a good thing, sometimes things happen (both consenting of course)...but negotiation talk is must (ie. this isn't going anywhere...or...this is only a one time thing...or Im interested, I will call you)...with this takes 2 sec (won't spoil mood) and then choices can be made whether to do it or not...as you pick your consequences too!
as far as a relationship developing...who the hell knows from one date...seriously...no expectations right? | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 6:57:04 AM | | It’s always been my policy that if a woman didn’t want to have sex with me on our first date I didn’t call her again. On the other hand, if she does sleep with me I always call her again. I’ve been involved in a number of LTRs (some lasting as long as ten years) and they all started with sex. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 7:21:47 AM | Well lets see ex#1 we mutually decided to wait because of past experiences and we wanted to make the relationship work well we gave it a gallant effort and lasted about 3 months before giving in but that didn't make the relationship last either .
Ex#2 we decided to wait and again lasted about 2 months before we gave in and attacked each other but again she become an ex too. Really I don't see the need to wait if both people feel the spark then it is a good way to get to know someone and if both people are non judgmental and non hypocritical then it should have no bearing on whether a relationship develops.Or last. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 8:42:46 AM | I've had 4 long term relationships. In two we had sex the first time we met. In one it was the second time, and in the 4th (the first chronologically) it was rather muddied as to what was our first "date" but one could say that sex followed rather soon thereafter.
On the otherhand there have been a half-dozen or so occassions where I meet with someone, hit it off, do the deed, and then never hear from them again. It leave's a man like me wondering.
I tend to recognize the type of person I want to be with quite quickly: physically, intellectually and emotionally. I tend to act on that.
I am a complete hypocrit but I would advise any woman to NOT have sex on the first date. The guy will be back for more, unless that is all they wanted. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:19:22 AM | If you cant have a relationship with no sex, you cant have one with it. At least not a good one. Oh Im sure you can stay together for years and even get married but youll wind up divorced or miserable. If I date a woman that wants sex on the first date, she doesnt get it or called back.  | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:53:11 AM | to be honest i think it all depends on after the sex as alot of the time u will find that if its just or sex then he/she will act differently. But i do aslo think that its all dependin on if the timing is right its that that decides if 2 people take a relationship seriously or not
WELL THATS MY VIEW ANYWAY LOL | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 9:59:37 AM | this is not totally..................not all the men maybe some of them we talking 87% and the rest are propably looking for sumething else........freindship, freind, travel partner,....but i guess we all dont get to choose who we wanna be with cause it just happens.........and we might know deep down we care about someone and would hav done anything for them on our part....but its never the same on there part.......dating site are more complex...........people would propably feel more rejected on here than there normal lives....................i think i lost track of the topic.......ooh yeah...Does having sex when you meet for the first time ruin a chance of a relationship well its like saying do you believe in love at first site ................the answer is .........
Does having sex when you meet for the first time ruin a chance of a relationship = YES & NO
do you believe in love at first site =YES but its one sided cause it happened to me..and we got to together after a long cat and mouse chase.........i"ll you this woman dont make thinks easy.....if you get laid on your first date. its because part of them wanted to do that as well.........cause i dont think they"re eazy.......i"ll hush up now ..... | |
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dellan
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Joined: 11/6/2006
Msg: 40 | |
| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 10:09:03 AM | | yes they can maybe there just supper attracted to each other or lonly as long as the guilt trip dos nt set in its cool sh-t happens | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 10:27:01 AM | | If you're worried about being taken seriously by someone after having sex with them on the first date...why would you have sex with them to begin with? There are so many misguided views about this, it actually makes me laugh. You have men here saying they'd never call back if you did..yet hmm...kinda takes two to make it happen does it not? How many threads are there saying women are too uptight about sex...and all about the third date rule etc? No wonder people are so skewed when it comes to sex. If you feel fine about it, and you can live with yourself the day after...who cares if he takes you seriously or not? It really boils down to how YOU feel about it.... If the guy is the type of chump that plays the part until he gets a piece of you, chances are waiting awhile will only prolong the problem.... | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 12:46:17 PM | | I have a high sex drive and I do not apologies for it. Humans have been programmed to want sex. It is hard wired into us. Babies masturbate while still in the womb! To deny our impulses is to deny what makes us human. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 12:50:47 PM | | Come on just because you have a high sex drive doesnt mean you cant control yourself. And if you cant control yourself you will just cheat anyways and we are right back to a poor relationship. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 1:42:08 PM | Aren't we all grown up here? If it feels right do it....if a guy is going to stick, he will regardless if sex is on the first, second or third date
Agrees with this one.. But normaly won't do sex on the 1st or 2nt date.. I want to know someone before that happens. But that's just me... I like the "Closeness" of sex, not just the "act" !!
Just "going through the motions" isn't what I'm looking for...
..oO( If I need to just "get off" I've got BOB for that )   | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 2:43:02 PM | | I believe it was Oscar Wilde that said “those who can control their desires do so because their desire is low enough to be controlled.” | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 3:08:54 PM | I don't think it really matters - if you have a mental connection with the person - then it can lead to a relationship. I think I get where the OP is coming from though - especially being female. There is kind of a general concensus that men don't get serious with people they sleep with right away.
My two serious relationships both were precluded by sex on the first date. | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 3:23:58 PM | | In general, no. But I did have sex with someone on a first date that was so earth moving, we dated for three years. But there was absolutly no trust (from her and me). Some relashionships are very insecuring (not just people). | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 3:47:58 PM | | same as alot of people have said, if it happens it does, but surely its about u and her and wot ur looking for,,, sex can be just sex, sex with a trusted loving person is different,,,, unless u go through the same script all the time, guys do this so do women,,, climb on climb off,,,, sex in a relationship IS different,,, but that isnt to say a first night animal passion thing isnt good either,!!!!!!!! do whats good 4 u and ur emotional stabillity, god i sound like a shrink,,, | |
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| question on sex and first date?
Posted: 4/28/2007 4:14:10 PM | uh oh..the everpopular..."Does she do this often" q. Um, well if u were doing it with her, there really is no difference dude.
Once again it just proves that men can sleep around and not be judged but if a woman has sex with someone early on...she is a whore. Love it.
Anyway, I don't think that having sex with someone on the first night or early on even, is a good idea. Even if you continue seeing eachother, it is mainly going to be based on the fact that he or she knows u are a slam dunk...ya know? Does he or she really want to get to know u as a person? I don't think they do. In fact, I think that it ruins the chances of having a good, strong relationship. It is too bad really. | |
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