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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 1/31/2006 2:12:24 AM | most guys are idiots and well you should not let them chip away at your self esteem... you will find someone that will sweep you off your feet... what most guys want or they think they want is the trophy girlfriend... the skank that has a tight body and no personality... don't worry most guys grow out of the phase, however some don't and will forever be looking for the bigger better deal, or so they think it is... until the beotch wants them to pay for everything, buy them everything and then she starts sleeping with their friends...
but like i said, don't let those guys that you are obviously so much better than, take away your self esteem... they are so not worth it... you are above them and the stupid shallow broads whose arms they run into... the ugly mean women who may look sexy and great on the outside but are vile disgusting and evil on the inside... and they learn the hard way...
MR RIGHT will come along for you and when he does you will wonder why you ever lost sleep over any of those dumb jerks and why you let them make you feel that bad about yourself... karma will come back and bite them in the a$$ LMAO | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 2/1/2006 4:16:25 PM | | Well cariss, let me see if I can help u a lil. The "its not u, its me" speech isnt complete bs. Sure, some guys use it as a way out of a relationship, but many times it bears true. Guys who have insecurity issues can only go for so long before they stop and realize they dont deserve such a great girl. Happened to me. I found myself cryin my eyes out tryin 2 figure out why my ex was with a loser like me. I couldnt accept it. A lot of guys cant. If that line was true for ur man, he was truly honest and you should respect his effort to help himself understand. Guys dont wanna get hurt anymore than girls do, and the deeper an insecure guy gets into a relationship, the more he thinks hes gonna be hurt when it ends. So we run. | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 2/10/2006 6:16:15 PM | I believe that most people are not idiots. That we are just driven by different things. Different paradigms.
For instance, a bloke that has young children will have different priorities than one who has grown children, or none at all.
So, I would like to think that there is good in all of us and we all seek the same thing.
"To love and be loved in return"
Coogah | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 2/10/2006 8:45:07 PM | I have a theory.
"It's not you, it's me" can actually be true. It's a half-ass way of admitting that they're really shallow and can't appreciate you, even though they know they should.
People have morals that they were 'told' to believe, and that's how they'll present themselves ("I'm looking for a nice person, looks don't matter"). Usually when it comes down to the wire, the truth will come out. | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 2/11/2006 11:58:20 AM | I think it goes both ways..men and women do it..Meet a person and give them the benefit of a doubt on whether it's going to be a  or  . A trial run so to speak. But before you invest too much in one person ..it is soooo important to read between the lines. Most of these people online are talking and meeting more than one person ...and..sometimes the little brain on men dictates the " Chemical reaction" syndrome. AND sometimes the fantasy ends up being more exciting than the reality and reactions differ when reality hits them in the face. So even if they are telling you they are having a good time with you..they are really thinking about that Hot Blonde/Brunette/Redhead waiting on their computer..Miss fantasy... That's why 'it's them"..not you. It's better to have friends you know that will hang around than those who are just playing..and have not really learned how to maintain long term relationships...anyway..keep looking and do read between the lines.. | |
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| Why do people judge people before getting to know them
Posted: 2/20/2006 8:59:00 AM | | Well I am just a woman trying to find the right man. But I always get the wrong impression brought up. How are you suppose to go out and find a man if you can't meet them, also get to know them. I had my fair share of head games and players, I am not looking for that. | |
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| Why do people judge people before getting to know them
Posted: 2/20/2006 2:41:11 PM | Think of it this way: If you wanna date a very good looking person, chances are that person has a ton of people going after her/him. It will not work.
You are not going to be their type since they only will date people that look like them, especially women (this is not women bashing, but just read how many of them ask for men to be tall, fit and attractive as requirements to date them)
You have to start dating more within your range. This way you wont run into players or people who only want to play around with others' feelings... | |
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| Why do people judge people before getting to know them
Posted: 3/21/2007 6:06:15 PM | I am thin but older so I could do the "I am older and thats why" thing.
I have tried and liked a differant way of thinking about this and going through
things like this with dating.
Men are funny but when they fall in love, they fall hard and deep.
I am talking your average nice guy here, not real oddball types.
If they see you 3 or 4 or 5 times they are officially looking at
you now and wondering if they are in "love" and your relationship
is going to be long term. Scares the hell out of some of them.
They just might not be ready for that yet.
Some of these guys probably think your a very nice person
and they don't want to hurt you and they don't want to "play"
you because your a good kid.
I have seen it all in the few months I have been around here, LOL
and could not explain most of it but when a new guy contacts
me I always think oh wonderful, a new friend maybe, if he sticks
around, LOL, for more than two days, LMAO.
I don't think of love yet, just meeting a new friend.
If I don't hear from him again then we did not make
it to friendship never mind any thing else.
It might be a story I tell myself but the "friend maybe" thing
works good for me and I don't feel bad or hurt if we did not
make it to good friends or long term lover.
Dating in cyber space is not for the faint of heart.
It amazes me every day, LOL
You know a guy stops writting and you hear nothing
and a month later contacts you and you can say
"wow, I thought you died or something, how the heck
are you?" and laugh because you only thought of him as an online
friend in the first place.
I dunno, hope you feel better I hate to see you feeling hurt.
Really. | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 3/21/2007 10:07:35 PM |
Please tell me, why do guys always do this, we meet, we have good times for a couple weeks, and then bam! they drop off the face of the earth. And no, i'm not sleeping with them usually. Then they give me the "its not you, its me" bullshit which we all know is a load of you know what. I do not understand. I am a nice, caring girl with alot to offer I think. And Although i'm overweight, I dont think i'm what you would call ugly. I have a job and dont expect a man to take care of me or pay my bills. I can have fun along with the rest of em on an evening out, but I can also stay home and do nothing.
So guys, can you tell me why do you do this? Do you even care that it chips away at a person's self esteem little by little, until they end up like me, with literally none left?
yeah, guys get it too as others have said....i don't mind anymore actually. all it means is more time for me,  . what i really hate is when they clearly see you're interested and THEY take the initiative to make plans and promises of future dates and all the stuff you're going to do together, THEN they fall off the face of the earth. if you're clearly not interested or there is even 1% doubt, why make the promises?? just don't say ANYTHING!! we know its not cool to be confrontational but seriously, why lead someone on when you don't have to?? that makes no sense. | |
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| Why do people do this?
Posted: 3/22/2007 12:02:09 AM | I don't know why people get so mad about this, at least the guys gave you an answer at the end. There are times when people don't even say anything and just disappeared. I don't know about other people but for me it takes more than a few dates to really get to know a person and I can normally read people's mind. So maybe things went well in the first few dates but at the end they found out you two aren't very compatible, no one's fault, no right or wrong, so they bow out, that's the right thing to do.
That's why I don't like dates, people have expectations, how about not having expectations and actually try to get to know people and see if you can become friends first? | |
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