| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 7/21/2007 3:41:45 PM | I can relate to Milehiguy , I got that bum deal too!
Except 2 things I disagree with:
1. I don't want to meet/chat with s.o. down the street because I'm still here on the other side of the world ( not everybody lives where they wish to or should be, so geographical blocks bug me.)
2. Vancouver, a few hours drive North of Seattle, is more gorgeous.
As for making the first contact, glad to know it doesn't freak you guys out.
-Stuck in Italy | |
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Ojabwe
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Joined: 7/11/2006
Msg: 302 | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 7/22/2007 6:58:49 AM | I love it when a woman takes the initiative. Being a man, we don't notice "hints" of body language as easily as women do. I can only count on both of my hands the number of times a woman has initiated "first contact", but those times have always been worthwhile.  | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 12:17:11 AM | Any man who is not flattered by a woman making first contact is on the wrong website. Once I figured this whole thing out and rewrote the profile page, I have had many first contacts and the latest was no less flattering than the first. I was reading the comments in this thread quickly just now and recall one guy saying it just about right...it is the self confident, mature women who do this most often as they are comfortable and happy with who they are.
Bit of advice to the guys who say they would like to be contacted out o the blue- put something on your page that makes them laugh or at least gives a bit o insight into your personality...and if that doesn't work, remove the picture. LOL cheers | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 5:22:45 AM | | Contacting guys first or making the first moves is something i was taught was a no no... i need to learn to get over this, it must be difficult for guys so i guess we do need to be able to deal with rejection too. | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 11:31:51 AM | I've never actually met someone from a dating site, I'm not really here for that, but in the live scene I've occasionally pursued men I was attracted to and I'm not buttugly so I've never been turned down, and I don't usually take them right home I try to make a date for later. I found these turn into short-term relationships so I've made it a point not to do that anymore - mostly. If I am pursued they are usually looking for a real relationship, though I've also been approached by men who made it quite clear they are looking for sex only, which is much appreciated. Sometime the itch gets scratched, mostly I go home alone. Depends on the circumstances, one night stands don't really do much for my self esteem, and it makes me feel lonely for a guy who really wants to spend time with me.
So, I think men like it and get a nice little ego boost, but I don't expect much to become of it, just because they'll accept my flirtation doesn't have anything to do with with...pretty much anything else about me. | |
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TeJ_25
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Joined: 2/17/2007
Msg: 313 | |
| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 12:06:02 PM | | have no issues with it. think women contacting guys may serve as a confidence booster for him. or raise the self esteem. at least for those guys who don't have it to begin with. think that expectations come into play at some point in the relationship. so it may make sense to get what you want in the first place. think that some women enjoy the power of having a guy depended on them for either confidence or self esteem. and think that the concept of leveling may take place for guys who may already have these qualities. this may occur vice-versa for gals also. if a gal expects to be contacted first. then even if she contacts a guy who may meet her expectations for a relationship. she may in some way feel that her expecatations had not been met | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 8:02:34 PM | "Personally I would welcome a woman making the first move cuz it never happens to me EVER lol......so I would be shocked but excited."
AWAITINGU....I looked at your profile and I can't believe you aren't being hounded by women on this board. You sure you telling the truth here or fudging just a little?
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 8:28:34 PM | When a women makes the first contact I treat it as a compliment. I think most guys would say it increased the interest factor in the least.
I always found that a women who is confident and who is willing to go out and make things happen, is great 
Some guys still have the onset that its not right but I say if you want something to happen you cant rely on waiting for someone else to make the first move.
In my thoughts, don't stop. If he cant see that your confidence is sexy and alluring then he is just not worth your time. You can't change who you are  | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 9:17:13 PM | | This biggest thing to me that I gain from a woman making the first move is that they have a high sense of self-esteem and are proud of themselves. Both of these being good qualities. | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/8/2007 9:33:04 PM | I would love for a woman to be that bold to actually make first contact. Turn off? No way! Nothing better then a attractive woman who goes after what she wants.
Don't feel bad about the contact thing either. Most people on this site don't even reply, very few do. If someone writes me then I write back no matter what to let them know. It's not pushy at all. | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/9/2007 2:53:49 AM | with regards to OP
LOVE IT, LOVE IT, LOVE IT
Even at my age equal rights was the law of the land. I like a woman to have the self confidence, courage and honesty to do something about what she wants out of life rather than sit passively to the side.
Here's a great example. At a new years party a woman I was friends with for years walked right up to me and before I knew it tried to kiss me on the mouth. Sober. Out of reflex I turned my head and she kissed my cheek.
She looked me right in the eye, nodded, and said "O.K."
There was no beating around the bush, no uncomfortable words that needed to be said, no temptation to gloss over the truth which was simply that I did not have an attraction for her. However, after such a courageous gesture, I really wish I did. | |
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| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/11/2007 4:56:08 PM | Golly I hope not otherwise my mailbox might have cobwebs in it.
Seriously, since I get a lot of looks but very, very few nibble, I find I must make contact with those that tickle the fancy or at least sound interesting or even make me laugh.
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jayver
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Joined: 7/15/2007
Msg: 325 | |
| Does a women making the first contact turn you off?
Posted: 8/13/2007 7:47:36 PM | I rather enjoy it when a woman makes the first contact. In all honesty, I prefer it that way.
At least this way I can pretend that I'm waiting for them to contact me, rather than admitting that I'll be rejected out of hand if I have the temerity to approach them.  | |
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