| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/22/2006 6:52:41 PM | | I have had platonic male friends for years, one since we were kids and fyo, thats over 50 years. Because of it I met one of my best girlfriends, now his wife, and I have another friend who has been around close to 40 years, again, when he met his wife, she and I became very good friends. I am the tomboy who never grew up, had more male friends as a youngster, no girls near me, and continue to have many friends of both sexes. Never considered any of them as bed buddies, than you very much, we just had a lot of the same interests, and no, it was never sex! | |
|
| |
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/22/2006 9:54:34 PM | Most of my friends are women. It's a sideeffect of the profession I chose. I don't have any trouble keeping my hands off them.
The one thing I do find though; friends usually have some kind of chemistry that keeps them friends. Between a male and a female, it has to be between the "casual aquatiance" rating, and the "I want you as more than a friend" area. The girls that like me, and I just want to be friends with tend to "leave" when nothing happens. If they find out I like them, and they don't like me in that way, they do the same dissapearing act.
I don't think it's just a guy problem. I think it's people in general. | |
|
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/22/2006 11:34:51 PM | My thoughts exactly smoochie! At least half of my closest friends are male,I'm surprised at the amount of people who think you can't be just that...friends! And I too have shared my bed with both my female & male friends & sex was never an issue.I guess our friends & us are a rare breed!  | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 2:07:46 AM | If plato went to pluto and brought a heavenly martian lady along would it sizzle , fizlle or plateau......and if his spaceship crashed would it be named the Plutonic... sorry couldnt resist
OT-sometimes you can sometimes cant- I had such a relationship once... I ended up marrying her and she bore me 2 lovely children. We had similar carreers and it was mostly banter on work related issues ,hardly a spark between us ....then one day...........WHAM!!! it happened. | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 5:23:24 AM |
I guess our friends & us are a rare breed!
I have to agree that is a rare breed! I have yet to meet a man that just wanted to be friends. I only have female friends and I'm content with that. | |
|
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 5:56:13 AM | I have lots of male friends..but they are like brothers to me and I am like a sister to them...other people may judge and think there is something sexual going on but thats because they are narrow-minded and think everyone is constantly shagging!! I have friends of all cultures and beliefs..if we were only limited to friends of the same sex then how would we learn about the opposite sex?..
 | |
|
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 9:39:37 AM | I love it ....................... shagging, i just found out British people say that, and i thought it was just a Austin Powers saying LOL.
well nothing wrong with shagging if both parties are mature enough and can handle some shagging | |
|
| u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 10:31:18 AM | I think you can, or thought you can anyways. lmao.
I have male friends, but when I think about it, either he or I had an attraction at first. Then it is talked about and become known that maybe the other isn't interested in that type of releationship.
Then if there is still common interests between the two people that is when they hang out and be friends.
I have a few male friends. I hang out with one of them every weekend and he rents a room from me. We dance on fridays, sit and talk until all hours of the night. We are the best of friends and I wouldn't give him up for anything!!!! Well, maybe a non-platonic friendship with someone else
JMO | |
|
| u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/23/2006 11:44:09 PM | ^^^^^ EXACTLY!!!!
But here is the deal.....knowing that there always is that attraction at first, how comfortable are you with your boyfriend, husband, whatever, hanging out alone with a female friend. I ask this with you knowing that the attraction does, or has existed. And if you would not feel comfortable, then I applaud your willingness to be open. Why should anyone really be ok with that?? They can make a show of trust, but when it comes down to it, they really dont 100% trust that kind of friendship. The only way is to include your partner....and the friends partner (because if he stays single, there is a reason) in things. That is the only way to do it and I say that if you are not willing or he is not willing to do that, it just a really big red flag. | |
|
| |
| |
| u can't have a platonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/24/2006 12:19:48 AM | I have plenty of female friends ...... they are all great people and good friends It is not a problem ..... the assumption is absurd that it could be anything else in all situations. I also have a couple of female friends that I have been with and are still friends with .... but I would not want or expect or consider that from all. I don't expect lesbians want to go to the sheets with all their female friends or gays with all their male friends either. Friendship is just that! | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/24/2006 4:00:46 AM | Of course you can, but to say that the idea of a sexual relationship never crossing your mind, No. I have lots of friends of the opposite sex and at some point during the friendship I have probably thought about being in a relationship with them, but I just blame my thoughts on being a man, did you know that 90% of men have had sexual thoughts about 90% of the women they have met. Thank god not all thoughts result in actions, id have very few friends. | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/24/2006 6:26:48 AM | | I have many girl friends in which the relationship is strictly plutonic and I'd never consider starting anything up with any of them. I guess it goes with the territory of being a nurse and working shift work. Since my job and my children limit my social activities, I've learned to treat people as people and not as 'genders'. | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/25/2006 7:20:25 PM | He also said that if a local woman said she had a male friend coming over it would be the same as cheating as too is spooning/cuddling a friend.
Having a friend of the opposite sex come over? All cool. Spooning and cuddling? Not cool at all. Not cheating, but not cool. More than enough justification for dumping if it continues. | |
|
| |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex Posted: 1/25/2006 8:29:07 PM | i'm from nc as well and i have multitudes of male friends that i don't think about having sex with--i don't think they were thinking of getting lucky themselves when visiting. i've had a few of em sleep on the couch when they might be too late to go home or are passing thru or have had a bit too much wine. in my opinion a friend is a friend and if you cross the line into sex why then they are sex partners. i think maybe the friend you were talking to is of a different ilk than the ones i know-- just because we're all from nc doesn't mean we're all conservative and thinking of what we can gain from one of the opposite sex.  | |
|