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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 1:44:20 PM | I have always had this problem, however if you are just friends there is always one that likes one more than the other. I have a few women that are just friends, but they are x girls friends. I think the best relationships start out as being friends, not in all cases but a few of mine. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 2:06:32 PM | OH GOOD GRIEF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have lots of male friends, great friends, some of them for over 20 yrs. Some of them wanted more, and sometimes I wanted more. It just wasn't to be.
It does to happen in Carolina, it happens everywhere, good grief people. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 2:52:04 PM | OF course its possible......it's called drawing boundries in a relationship. If someone doesn't know how to draw boundries IN A RELATIONSHIP......I think it'll be difficult to keep it PLATONIC. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 2:55:42 PM |
Women like keeping guys on strings for later use.
She dates, decides to be friends. He hopes for more. He is so desperate (or hopeful for nooky) that he agrees to be buddies.
Ive been victim to this, and probably still am.
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What is a really good relationship? Strong Friendship + Mutual Attraction + Meets the Needs of people (+ great sex).
If your really good friends than you have the most rare piece of that puzzle already there. And probably most of the "Meets the Needs of the People." I find the attraction just developes when you spend more and more fun times with the person. There is a precise moment where the person starts looking alot better for me, no matter what I thought of her innitially. I need barriers not to think about it: people at work, long distance, family, ect.
I wish I could have platonic relationships with girls. They are great friends generally, gove invaluable advice, and their good sources of meeting other people you can actually date ;)
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Girls: If you havent thought about it I am sure your guy friends have. But for your own sake PLEASE dont bring it up to them, because they'll think this is their big opportunity. They will probably confess their love to you. because they think you have thought about it too, and they get their Fairy Tale ending. O man, it could be bad.
Good idea for a reality show here ;) | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 5:23:15 PM | Is it possible in the practical, common sense? Depends if you're both single and straight. If you're a single girl, and you have a single guy friend, and you hang out one-on-one, regardless of his type, there's about a 99.9% chance he does not see you as just a friend. So for all practical purposes, yes, Virginia, they all want to bang you. :) And if you are a lady quickly thinking "No, that's not true! That's not true!" without really taking things into consideration, then you're clueless and wouldn't want to think otherwise anyway.
You, the lady, may see him as just a plutonic entity, but he does not. It doesn't necessarily mean he can't deal with it or anything, or he has some huge crush on you. He would like to hook up with you. Think about it, ladies. Let's say you go back to your place after a night at the bar (buzzing), he goes into your bathroom, comes out, and there you are naked on your couch and you seriously say "Let's just get dirty. Do me..." Does he:
(a) Tell you that he can't, because that might destroy a beautiful friendship, or...
(b) Comply.
You can see why guys ya date aren't thrilled about having guy friends closer than just being in the circle of your friends. And if you're attractive and single -- come on - the guy is sexually attracted to you, and does put forth the effort to build up brownie points towards possibilities, whether he does enjoy your company on a plutonic level or not. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 5:30:01 PM | I thinkyou can have a relationship...I have always had guy freinds..They tell you as it is...I love that...A woman won't say anything at all....or they get catty claws out depending on thier mood...lol
Guys are laid back and more relaxed...well the ones I know are...
Thank gawd....I am more live wired...LOL | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 6:21:00 PM | I think it's a lot easier if both are in relationships.
A friend is someone who will help you in a time of need. Your car breaks down, they'll give you a ride. You're at home sick and they'll drop off some milk and bread if you can't go out to the store. You're going on vacation and they'll come over and water your plants while you're gone. That's what friends do. If you're feeling down they'll drop by and chat for a while or invite you out. If there is something your friend can do for you or you can do for your friend that isn't some monumental task then I feel we all want to do it.
The sticky part comes (no pun intended) when both are single, I believe. Both miss the closeness of a relationship. The intimacy. The sex. If there is an attraction is sex more effort than stopping at the grocery store and picking up milk and bread? | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/11/2006 7:01:52 PM | yup, possible.
I have a good handful of guy friends that I have been friends with for YEARS. I mean YEARS.. that nothing has ever or will ever happen with.
I know this to be true.. that nothing will ever happen, Cause I know what dingles they can be.. and they know how dramatic I can be.. LOL. Which is why we make GREAT friends.. cause friends dont mind a bit of drama.. and well dingles.. haha they make for great saturday nite humour sessions. | |
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SUN-2
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Joined: 4/11/2006
Msg: 185 | |
| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/12/2006 10:55:27 AM | What's your gains from being with you ex?
If you reverse the scenario how would you feel?
What are your motives for introducing your new love to your ex?
Did you weight your options Gains/Losses
How valuable is your new love to you?
Are you now ALONE or is there somebody in your life? I'll answer that: YOU'RE HERE OTHERWISE YOU WOULD BE WITH HIM
When you answer all the questions truthfull to yourself you'll know why an Ex SHOULD be marked with a big X that's my belief. I would not introduce my new love to my ex, NEVER
simply out of respect for her feeling, that of course only if you TRULY love him/her | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/12/2006 11:10:26 AM | | sure its possible to have a platonic relationship. It's more difficult when the woman is reeking with orgasmic sexuality. Is she a flirt? If you were out with a man and wore what is in your profile I'm thinking that he might have a HARD time. He should or take the risk of losing his Man's license | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/12/2006 11:35:12 AM | Yes of course you can have platonic relationships with people of the opposite sex.
I can count on one hand how many females I call my friends, but couldn't even begin to count how many guys I would count as my friends. I have been burned worse by females than by guys, and I just relate better to men. Most females think I'm out to get their man and/or are jealous of me because I do my own thing and don't need a man to validate myself. A lot of women are intimidated by me, so I choose to stay away from them. If you look through my cell phone or through my messenger list... hell you could probably count the girls with two hands and most of those would be family or co-workers!! LOL
Granted, this has caused problems with guys I've been romantically involved with, however, I choose to deal with guys who mostly deal with females so that they understand where I'm coming from on that front. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 4/12/2006 12:21:56 PM | | Of course! Most of my best friends were male. When I was very young I was bored with all the girly talk about boys and clothes and constant gigling. At least with boys I could discuss serious subjects like politics, religion, clasical music, art, science etc, most girls didn't seem interested. Now I have a wonderful male friend and our friendship is 100% platonic. We talk for hours, listen to music, watch movies, go for walks, cook and go wine tasting or just have a good time with mutual friends. It's wonderful! | |
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| friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/9/2006 9:21:27 AM |
I can't understand how u think that just by being close to sum1 of the opposite sex and sleeping next to them means sex is on the cards
Pretty hard to believe you can sleep next to some one and not get sexually aroused!
I think it is more your integrity that is at stake here! Why sleep next to some one you dont intend making love to - is space a problem? | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/9/2006 10:41:15 AM | Sure you can be just friends with someone of the opposite sex. Its real easy if you aren't attracted to them. Or for some reason or other, two people just decide to not go past a certain point.
In your case though, I'd say its going to be harder for you to find men who don't find you attractive. Just my opinion though. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/9/2006 8:10:24 PM | | I personally have had platonic friendships with the opposite sex and it didnt work we were either all over each other or argueing b/c one of us wanted to a couple and the other didnt. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/9/2006 8:40:39 PM | Yes ... they are from the former planet Pluto ... that I am sure.
there is no cure for thinking that way
you must have sex with everyone of the opposite sex you know and like.
they find it out of sight to just like.
my oh my ... what a disguise they must put on in their family functions
brother and sister inlaws and cousins and oh the neighbours.
well well well ... isn't all that coveting swell.
makes my head spin
just to begin thinking of all the possibilities.
or is it all the fake smiles and greetings full of small talk
those walks with the pals
drives to the show
oh how could they not know
you wanted to jump their bones
their wives bones
husbands bones
the dogs bones
you just have to jump jump jump
bone bone bone
yea.... get on home
soon you'll be alone.
if you can't have plutonic friendships with the opposite sex
you will find very quickly your friendships don't last.
for when the guys get coupled and you can't be just a friend to her ... you won't be around much.
good luck folks | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/9/2006 9:18:42 PM | | Yes it is possible to interact with the opposite sex in a platonic manner, if you're balanced, mature and stop to see the opposite sex, well, as an opposite sex, but simply as a person. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/10/2006 8:03:58 AM | | About a year ago I was sure I couldn't have a real, honest friendship with a girl/woman/lady (covering all the bases!). Now, I have one. Weird at first, but since I am so lazy I couldn't keep putting up a fight. Now we are friends - hell, we even watch family guy together on Sundays. Sometimes it gets awkward trying to explain to people that I am going over her house to hang out and not to...you know...ahem - when I actually mean it this time - but I somehow stumbled upon a honest friendship with a girl/woman/lady (will continue to cover said bases!). That, and she can really cook. Which is nice. So, since no one will really read this - I can say I feel confident that my meandering, incoherent response will certainly change the world. Or not. One of the two. Maybe. Have a good one! | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/10/2006 8:06:06 AM | | I dont' care what anybody says, it is totally possible to have a plutonic friendship with the opposite sex. I have about 10-15 plutonic friendships with women. Girls that I never dated, never kissed, and never had sex with. Their just cool girls to hang out with that I have things in common with. | |
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| u can't have a plutonic friendship with opposite sex
Posted: 9/10/2006 8:39:46 AM | | Both men and women can and do have plutonic friendships. I've had several long lasting ones and I cherish each and every one. To insist that a mature adult can not be friends with a past lover or a new opposite sex friend is to incinuate that we are not intelligent enough to realize that the advice and companionship of a pure friend is a true gift. | |
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