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 NotAfrog
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 126
Nice GuysPage 6 of 13    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13)
I said her dream
 GOODNIGHT_ALL
Joined: 8/8/2005
Msg: 127
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 4:34:57 PM
I just read this thread and i am wondering .....Whats wrong with a man giving everything that he can to a woman? Putting her up on a pedistole and treating her good and making her feel needed and wanted.

If i am a wimp for having respect for women and being a nice guy......well shit i guess i am just a fawking wimp then.
 Camie Creative
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 128
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Posted: 1/23/2006 4:43:13 PM
Giving everything you can to a woman is fine as long as it doesn't involve corrupting your own sense of right and wrong, make you change who you are and eventually lead you to passive aggressive behaviour because you've been giving for 10 years and she's been taking for 10 years and you don't have the balls to stand up to a bully so you just say "Yes dear" and then do what you want behind her back anyway.

woah...apparently I have some issues there...hehe
 GOODNIGHT_ALL
Joined: 8/8/2005
Msg: 129
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 4:50:32 PM
Aparently so........

I dont do it cause i have too, i do it cause i want too and i expect the same treatment back. if she wants to be treated like a queen then she better treat me like a king, meaning if i am not getting back anything i will not be a doormat for her either so i would be gone
 Camie Creative
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 130
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Posted: 1/23/2006 4:53:18 PM
Atta boy. That's what I'm talking about. Women don't want men who'll take any shit they can dish out...they want a man who respects himsefl and will stand up for himself...it goes both ways, just like you said.
 NotAfrog2
Joined: 12/13/2005
Msg: 131
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 5:54:55 PM
Hey we're supposed to be talking about nice guys not wimps.
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 132
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:43:19 PM
If you hear "nice guy" during the break-up talk, it's synonymous with "wimp."
 NotAfrog
Joined: 12/1/2005
Msg: 133
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 6:52:49 PM
So whats synonymous for "a**hole"?
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 134
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Posted: 1/23/2006 6:58:02 PM
Oh, I imagine a woman wouldn't bother with synonyms if she actually thought the guy was an a$$hole. That'd be a situation where she wouldn't worry about his feelings.
 Gryff63
Joined: 12/23/2005
Msg: 135
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 7:00:36 PM
In my books nice guy =
treats the lady like a lady, nevers hits a woman, equality in the home and relationship. open communicator, honest, caring, etc
 Gryff63
Joined: 12/23/2005
Msg: 136
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 7:01:06 PM
In my books nice guy =
treats the lady like a lady, nevers hits a woman, equality in the home and relationship. open communicator, honest, caring, respect, making her feel loved and wanted.
 smiliegirl15
Joined: 6/20/2005
Msg: 137
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:20:45 PM
We need more like you Edmonton Man!!!! Not a doormat, giving, generous and expects to be treated the same. Chivalry is nice but not expected.
What goes around comes around. Treat someone else the way you want to be treated. Do unto others, etc, etc. I probably could think up more cliches but they are cliches because they are true. This is my policy in life as well as in dating.
 ex-princess
Joined: 1/11/2006
Msg: 138
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:24:17 PM
Where did all the bad boys go?
 atebis
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 139
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:27:22 PM

I just read this thread and i am wondering .....Whats wrong with a man giving everything that he can to a woman? Putting her up on a pedistole and treating her good and making her feel needed and wanted.



*swoon*
 chunkymonkey
Joined: 1/6/2006
Msg: 140
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:28:27 PM
Where did all the bad boys go?


*coming home from the polling station after going against the grain and voting liberal*

8P
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 141
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Posted: 1/23/2006 8:32:12 PM
Atebis, really? Wouldn't you begin to feel helpless? Like you weren't able to take care of yourself? Or feel like you were so in debt to the guy that you could never disagree with him without feeling guilty?
 atebis
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 142
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:35:18 PM
no,no,no. i like to feel needed, too. i want to feel wanted, cherished. not to be taken advantage of. it would go both ways, definatley, but i've found that the last few guys i dated just took, and never gave half as much back as i'd put in.... so i'd end up resenting them, and breaking up with them.
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 143
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Posted: 1/23/2006 8:41:33 PM
Fair enough. I guess I was commenting on this part of the statement, more than the rest:
Whats wrong with a man giving everything that he can to a woman? Putting her up on a pedistole and treating her good

In my experience, if that goes on too long, she'll begin to feel inferior, or obliged.
 atebis
Joined: 12/27/2005
Msg: 144
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 8:44:07 PM
ahh. read it all, you must, skywalker.
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 145
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Posted: 1/23/2006 8:50:38 PM
Well, they're two somewhat different things. You can give, and desire nothing in return (somewhat how I am). Or give and get nothing in return, even though nothing was desired (sounds like what you described). Or, worst cases, give and expect something in return, or accept with no intention of giving back.

So giving everything, but also, by some other means, showing desire (the positive forms of need/want, that are implied), are somewhat different things. Also tricky to pull off.
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 146
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Posted: 1/23/2006 8:53:40 PM
Oh, there're also endless pages of discussion/articles on "Nice Guys" at this site: http://www.heartless-bitches.com/rants/niceguys/ng.shtml
Some of them are quite good.
 wintersux
Joined: 12/24/2005
Msg: 147
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 9:13:16 PM
some guys get jaded though.....give all and get nothing..........same goes for girls too..!!
Trick is to find someone who realizes that, and acts accordingly.

saying it again.........Karma......................
 Camie Creative
Joined: 10/30/2005
Msg: 148
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Posted: 1/23/2006 9:16:33 PM
That's where the passive aggression comes in. The "Yes Dear" out of one face and the f*)#R&*$# other women out of the other. That's what happens when people are doormats instead of respecting themselves and their partners.

sigh

this has gone on a long time
 Spaceman_Spiff
Joined: 8/22/2005
Msg: 149
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Posted: 1/23/2006 9:17:39 PM
Yeah, one of the articles on that link I posted goes into depth about that. They describe it as the difference between kindness (giving without expection) and nice (giving with the expectation you'll get something in return). I don't really agree with the terminology, but the idea is valid.
 wintersux
Joined: 12/24/2005
Msg: 150
Nice Guys
Posted: 1/23/2006 9:22:50 PM
no i don't think you should have to wait for something in return..totally wrong...
it's a respect thing between 2 human beings. I think alot of relationships ending
could be attributed to a partner losing respect for the other 1.
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