| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 8:58:04 AM | Starting to agree with slubrub. And kudos for happycamper being so honest, although I don't think ALL men go there looking to get laid.
Still laughing over the way awaiting like to assume so much. And even if you think "a lot" of people do go to places like this, fine, but it sure isn't a majority. Did you not hear about how they are being outlawed and forced out of certain areas? And if you think I ever MADE him do anything, that is just another idiotic assumption. I may have given him choices, but the ultimate choice was always his. (Well, ok, except for the divorce. I wanted it, he didn't, didn't give him a choice on that one LOL) He had a problem with the deal because he was the jealous one.
And no, I couldn't care less whether or not you drink. Those clubs aren't even legally allowed to sell alcohol in a lot of places.
And no, this was not a trust issue at all for me. I was just sick of all the football/baseball etc practices and games that he was always gone for. Between that and work we didn't really get to go out much, so I was just tired of being stuck home all the time (he also was the only one with the car keys as I had no license yet and he was uncomfortable any time I used the public bus because of all the freaks in the bad part of town).
And Sexy, thanks for at least calling him out on one of his assumtions. And if it is all so interesting, as it may also answer a question in another thread regarding listing Prefer Not To Say, there just wasn't an option for drinks but only maybe a couple drinks a year socially. Sometimes there just isn't a correct box to check. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 9:01:00 AM | | wah wah................................decain said it just fine....and like I care if they are being outlawed in certain areas, I don't live there, not my concern... | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 9:03:27 AM | You said 'You told him not to go'. so when did you become his owner? In a healthly relationship all you should do is say 'I'd rather not you go'.
Men go to strip bars to see more naked women, yes we like that deal with it.
99.9% of the men will come home never having touched a dancer in a cheating way. Same men will be ready for sex with the partner they have come home to. Unless you think you own them and start telling them what they can't and can not do.
Just because we like looking at other naked women doesn't mean we don't find our partners sexy or don't want to be with them. If we didn't want to be with you we wouldn't be with you. Get some self confidence there. | |
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| honesty
Posted: 2/2/2006 9:23:37 AM | | thankyou delytful i believe in being at all time or at least i try. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 9:24:11 AM |
Considering the male ego, I am just confused about the whole thing. Asked the guy across the street, "How can you humiliate yourself by even walking through the door of one of those places? Isn't it embarrassing? Kind of like admitting you are such a loser that you have to PAY some girl to take her clothes off? And not even a decent one at that. One who is so sleazy that they will do it for ANY man who has a couple of bucks.
He admitted that he had never thought of it that way, and was then too embarrassed to ever go back LOL
I think about the same of the customers and the "dancers".
Was this comment about being a sleaze directed at me? If it was you are way off base. Making assumptions that you have no idea what the f*#@ you are talking about. Obviously if this was not a lucrative venture these clubs would not be open. And btw who made you the authority on who is and who is not a dancer? People have varying tastes thank god or this would be a very boring world.
I think you need to take a step ladder and get down off that high horse you crawled up on. Just because people don't agree with your view is not a reason to classify them as
sleazy
Just curious if you never frequented these places how do you know what the dancers are like? | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:13:43 AM | You're a 19 year old black woman in the Yukon Territory and your boyfriend is going to a strip bar? If there were ever a place for a young man to focus I would guess it could be the Yukon as well as anywhere elese, but young men don't focus very well now do they? That is unless they're being satisfied sexually, for that is the focus of most men let alone one at his sexual peak now isn't it? So, what aren't you doing or what do you look like? I have no idea what I'm talking about here.  | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:18:08 AM | Best thread I've read 
@ awaitingyu
You keep beating me to the punch.... lol... keep it up and well done.
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@ DragonN
takes popcorn away... shakes finger.... be nice.....
mmmmm buttered..... | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:19:04 AM |
but after i told him not to go he went
I've never been to a strip club and have no desire to ever go to one, but the day a woman tells me that I can't go is the day that I will go. I'll even bring her back pictures of the lap dance | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:25:05 AM | | who care as for me I pay for the lap dance for my bf and I to enjoy, I love it. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:28:08 AM | Hey lets face it.. if a man is going to cheat.. he's going to cheat.. stripper or no stripper..
thats the reality of it.. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:33:29 AM | | In fact, I will go out on a limb and say that the vast majority of men who cheat do so without the aid of a stripper. I've had a lot of friends who have cheated on the women in their lives. Not a single one of them did so with a stripper. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:39:50 AM | | Who cares where he gets his appetite from as long as he brings it home to you? The more you tell a man he can't do something the more he will do it. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 10:41:29 AM | | True that YamIhere.. most strippers go for the sugar daddies anyway... not the regular old schmoe..lol.. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:10:17 PM |
Who cares where he gets his appetite from as long as he brings it home to you? The more you tell a man he can't do something the more he will do it.
All together now... can I hear an AMEN??
Gawd, if a man tells me I can't do something, I'll be right out there to do it myself, goes both ways. Try and control me, I tell ya.... | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:14:10 PM | | Personally I dont see anything wrong with it, I have gone with my guy and we had a great time. Men like looking at women, heck some of us women love looking at women, it does not mean that they dont like looking at us. Also I have to say that no one man or woman likes be ordered to or not to do things, so I would not be surprised to see him go again. Did you discuss why it makes you uncomfortable? | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:24:08 PM | theres a stripper bar right below my college
I'm not allowed to go there after school cuz my gf gets jealous
not because I'm seeing naked women dance around
because shes NOT seeing them
lol
my gf rocks!!!! | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:24:26 PM | after i got married i never had a desire to go to the strip clubs. my wife supplied me with everything i needed. if you came right out and told him not to go and he went any way, it doesn't appear to me as though you have much of a relationship with him. they usually work both ways. if you haven't been with him long, i'd lay the law down to him. tell him your not going to put up with it. you said you didn't like him going to strip clubs. if he can't abide by your wishes, then it's time for him to go. there is no excuse in the world good enough for man or woman if they are in a committed relationship that they need to go to a strip club. most go there for only one reason and that's to see the flesh. lust after something they know they can't have, but it turns them on. yeah, that's what i would want my wife to do. NOT!! mel it should make you feel like shit, cause it sure wouldn't feel good to me either. good luck to you.  | |
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ndt
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Joined: 1/31/2006
Msg: 69 | |
| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 12:48:35 PM | He should'nt have gone period asked, told, or not.
Not even a Bar in my opinion.
You should be the only woman that matters and he not need to go to those venues to see other women even if it's only chat - especially when they are mostly there for one reason.
Just the atmosphere and the "meat-market" mentality that don't make sense for him to be there if he has you.
Whynot doesn't he go to a movie, diner, mall, or just hang out at one of the friends home with the guys.
That's my 2 cents! | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:06:33 PM | I dunno.. maybe i'm not like others..but I see nothing wrong with a guy going to a bar to hang with his buddies..
for one.. if and when I decided to get involved with a guy.. I'm one of those women that loves dancing.. I've taken salsa dance classes and go out with my girls... and I don't intend to stop my life just because i'm seeing someone..
I mean if your guy is going out ever night or weekend with his guys and not spending time with you then its a problem but if he goes out once in a while without you to a bar or strip club whatever the case maybe without you I just don't see what is so wrong with that..
the last guy I was with that told me I couldn't go out with my girlfriends became my ex ..
there has to be some trust in relationships.. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:06:53 PM | @ ndt
better yet don't let him work, since most relationships are started there, or .. or.. the
supermarket.. or .. or... oh please. This is all about insecurity.
And yeah lets hang out at the mall with all the Paris / Britney wannabe's...
Give your head a shake.
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Plain and simple, if someone is going to cheat they will, if you discuss your feelings
or insecurities with someone and they disrespect it, move on. Don't use a strip joint,
bar, club, church meeting, business trip, etc... as an excuse, it baffles me how
people make up excuses for their insecurities. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:09:45 PM | thank you its about time someone agrees with me he has me only me no other girl should even be in his life!!!!!
he shouldnt even look at other girls or even have convo's with those ****in filthy whores!!!!!!!!!!!! 
im fet up of that ****in no good filthy place it should burn down | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:13:58 PM | jeeeeez! it's gonna be ok mel.
it isn't the place or the dancers you should be upset with. it's him. the place is what it is. the ladies are just working. might not be a job i'd want but to each their own.
the problem is he's doing something that bothers you and doesn't care. it could be going to a strip bar or chewing with his mouth open
he needs to be more respectful of your feelings. if he can't be then he can't be. find someone who is.
you don't need tp be one of those women who enjoys going to strip clubs. i don't and i'm ok with that. be who you are and find someone who accepts you for you | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:17:34 PM |
he shouldnt even look at other girl
you might want to get some horse blinders for him when you guys go out then... cuase lets face it the only way not to look at someone is to poke his eyes out with a hot poker.. or throw him in a cage in your basement and throw the key away...
I think you might have a few self esteem issues you might want to look into.. | |
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| my bf went to the strip bar
Posted: 2/2/2006 1:23:36 PM | I'd let him go..Better yet, I'd go with him...
If YOU don't like it,then you don't like it.....but trying to tell someone how to spend their time is just wrong....if someone told me I couldn't go or do something, I'd ignore them...especially at such a young age..I'd probably want to go/do it even more...
As most of the forums have pointed out that men are just visual creatures..so let them view..you always will reap the rewards... | |
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