| All ______ are jerks
Posted: 2/7/2006 10:25:21 PM | | i understand now thankyou you all have made alot of sence and helped me out with alot of what was bugging me thanks and i think ill change my profile to dating thanks again | |
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zapt
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Joined: 11/4/2005
Msg: 27 | |
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| All guys are jerks
Posted: 2/7/2006 10:52:48 PM | jamesdean71 : MDNInja...what healthy women would take on a man who's lazy, sits on his ass all day, provides no financial support nor does he intend to. This would lead to a miserable life for both individuals (I've seen many relationship fail because of this).
Why are you asking me this? | |
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| All ______ are jerks
Posted: 2/7/2006 11:00:03 PM | if i've worked hard my whole life to have earned those material comforts, shouldn't the men i date have them too? | |
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| All guys are jerks
Posted: 2/7/2006 11:30:50 PM | leo_goddess: I know he'll be wickedly successful and I'm happy for him if that's what he wants. He hates his job though... he had no passion... he's not helping anyone. He didn't understand why I'd be looking to get out of a solid career that made me cry myself to sleep at night and start a foo foo business. The attraction was over at that point.
Again, the money wasn't the reason that you dumped this guy. You dumped this guy because he had no passion! You said after you found that out, the attraction was over. He works not because he is in control of his life and has a passion for it, but he works because he is addicted to work/money or has some deep obligation to fulfill. Guys, every guy, gets dumped for their personality disorders. So far I've heard two stories about two rich guys getting dumped. One got dumped because of his insecurity, the other because of his addiction. Neither got dumped because of how much they made or what their cars look like.
"Try being a woman that is successful and trying to date guys that are still getting there... they find out, feel immasculated and run in fear... sadly I learned to down play success and hide that part of me for as long as possible which I think is stupid because I think I should be proud of all I worked for and have achieved."
I imagine it is hard for you. But my dating life hasn't been all that easy, either. Everytime I asked out a fantastic woman who goes to a better school, I get shut down. Before in my life, I was ostracised for being an upper-class kid and when I did go to college, I didn't tell anyone that my parents owned a resort in cottage country. I did that because I didn't want anyone to treat me different because of it, and guess what, I never got one chance with any of the women that I liked. Now that I am proud of being a rich kid from a small town, and have big dreams, I magically get more looks, ect... I had to become a bit arrogant. Me and you are like two sides of the same damn coin.
I don't think it's fair to say that one sex has it easier than the other in the dating world because, how much dating you do depends largely on how much work you are willing to put into yourself and your social skills.
Now please, I hope to some God or budha that people understand what I wrote and don't read it with a narrow/biased mind. I am tired of explaining things to people on here. 
EDIT: hulla honey what ever: You couldn't have stated my point any more clearly. And for that I thank you. | |
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| All ______ are jerks
Posted: 2/7/2006 11:50:44 PM |
if i've worked hard my whole life to have earned those material comforts, shouldn't the men i date have them too?
I don't think there is any problem with your priorities. The fact that you are honest and straightforward about your wants and needs doesn't make you a golddigger in itself. It only becomes a problem if it's deceptive or manipulative. | |
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| All guys are jerks
Posted: 2/8/2006 10:30:49 PM |
But my dating life hasn't been all that easy, either. Everytime I asked out a fantastic woman who goes to a better school, I get shut down. Before in my life, I was ostracised for being an upper-class kid and when I did go to college, I didn't tell anyone that my parents owned a resort in cottage country. I did that because I didn't want anyone to treat me different because of it, and guess what, I never got one chance with any of the women that I liked. Now that I am proud of being a rich kid from a small town, and have big dreams, I magically get more looks, ect... I had to become a bit arrogant. Me and you are like two sides of the same damn coin.
We all got our own shit to deal with I guess... shapes who we are... makes us apprechiate THE ONE once we find them... but I don't think it would really matter to the one anyway. They would like us no matter what school we go to or what our parents own or how successful we've made ourselves.
Atleast that's what I like to tell myself....  | |
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| All guys are jerks
Posted: 2/9/2006 9:28:17 PM |
but I don't think it would really matter to the one anyway. They would like us no matter what school we go to or what our parents own or how successful we've made ourselves.
That's the paradox of attraction, the people you attract won't care. They'll convince themselves that they are attracted to you for core reason's and not the reason's that pulled the attraction trigger. Love/attraction is like a drug, once a person is hooked, they just don't care about anything else. | |
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