| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 5/17/2008 2:13:32 PM | | Personally, i would most definitely want a reply saying they are not interest than nothing at all. getting told why they arent interested is alot better then just being ignored. being ignored is pretty discouraging to me. well i cant say i know how to tell someone youre not interest but i do think its rude if a woman deletes your message without reading it. the very least you can do is say "sorry not interested, thanks" you know? | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 5/17/2008 2:32:43 PM | I just discovered your question. I was going to post something similar.
Yes, I would rather get a "Thanks but no thanks" or "I don't think we would be a good match" e-mail rather than no response at all. If I have taken the time and trouble of writing 2 or 3 paragraphs at least someone can say is "No Thanks." I have had one experience with a man who's profile didn't show a photo either but he deleted my e-mail without reading it and I had attached a photo.
An additional question is why post a profile on POF if you don't want responses? If you have several to respond to type the response once and copy and paste. Men say that they want responses but then never answer back. I have had probably had about 50% or less response rate from the men that I have e-mailed. The profile section leaves me discouraged but the forums are great. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 5/20/2008 3:26:12 PM | This is tough ... On the "Initial" contact, seems most of us agree when we send an e-mail no response means not interested.
Seems to most a response is preferred with honesty. Seems when honesty responds, nasty follows in a 2nd e-mail.
I have noticed that some women (not all) will not respond to a first e-mail but will respond to a second one. I thought at first that this was strange. But have come to understand that if you are really interested in them, they might be thinking you will write again.
To me it doesn't mater and I am guilty of not responding at times. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 1:54:45 PM | | "build a bridge and get over it" I don't really care either way, if there is no response then thats ok, its not as thought I was just banking on that one message to respond, I've sent more than one and have recieved more than one and the cycle continues... If you don't responde then I get it, but if you take to long to respond then it might be to late and you wont get it! | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 6:18:58 PM | | I usually send a polite email explaining my reasons. On the other side of the fence, I don't think I have ever gotten a rejection email just lots of big ol' DELETES in the the sent folder...I guess that is one way to get one's point across without having to type much...Oh well you know what they say...Some boys don't like girls like me aww but some boys do! | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:23:27 PM | I treat others as I want to be treated. If the person has taken the time to write a lot about themselves and really put their heart on their sleeve I usually write them back with a thank you and politely tell them that though I'm not right for them, there are plenty of fish in the sea. I punctuate said statement with the icon of a little dude fishing. 
But most the time I don't respond. I don't have time to be polite to 10 or more people a day. I'm a younger gal. I don't have kids. Have never been married. I don't need a man for money. I get a lot of emails. From older men. who want to be my sugar daddy.
I don't respond to those.
Yeah. And they wonder why I'm still single, right?
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:39:39 PM | Initial contact means an email message, right?
I would so much rather get a very brief reply instead of nothing at all. All anyone has to say is "Thanks, you seem to be very nice, but you're not the type I'm looking for. Good luck with your search."
That shouldn't hurt anyone's feelings and should get the message across. I think it's a courtesy if someone has taken the trouble to write.
Of course, if the initial message is something like "Hey, what's up," that doesn't merit a reply. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:56:24 PM | I think out of common courtesy a response is warrented . To be left out on a hook and not knowing is bad but there are so many fish in the sea as per say that some people do get alot of messages and cant be bothered to reply. Those people might be up on themselves so much that it might be best left alone and not have a reply. Kinda like the ones that are in a popularity contest and are looking to have the most favourites. I guess after a meeting i would always like to know which way a person should go as in thanks but no thanks or friends are nice or the next step . Just an opinion is all . Happy swimming . | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:57:38 PM | "Down to the crossroads , tried to beg a ride.
Nobody seemed to notice me , everybody passed right by..."
Really what is the quickest, least hurtful way to tell someone you don't want to pursue this?
Wait...after you've already met or before?
Before - no , do NOT ignore. The possibility then exists in the sender's mind that you may not have seen the message - they'll cling like a barnacle. Tell them you're contagious or something.
After - accuse them of being contagious. They'll stomp off in righteous indignation. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 8:59:01 PM | Seems to most a response is preferred with honesty. Seems when honesty responds, nasty follows in a 2nd e-mail.
Even polite responses get a nasty reply. I stopped responding for the most part. If I see that someone put a lot of effort into an email, I will generally reply unless it was negative or nasty stuff.
Frankly, I would just as soon get the no response than to have to read rejection. Why have someone waste their time or mine? The end result is the same. Next!
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 9:04:25 PM | | Honestly, I prefer not to hear back from them if they are not interested. What's the point of a rejection letter? You get the little "you have a new message" and get all excited just to be let down when you find out it's just a rejection. Since I've read all these posts from guys complaining about not getting a response, I've tried to be better about sending rejection emails, but honestly I feel kind of bad when I have to tell a guy I'm just not interested. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 6/24/2008 11:17:01 PM | i don't have a problem sending a message saying "thanks but i don't think you are what i am looking for". after all, someone has taken the time to click on my profile, read it and send me a message. i think it's only polite to reply at least initially and i do expect the same in return. if it doesn't happy, i just chalk it up to rudeness and move on.
however, if i may vent for just a moment: i have been getting emails from men without photos, with 1 liner profiles, and atrociously written messages. i do try to give people the benefit of the doubt - typos are easy to make and perfect grammar on a quick message isn't realistic. i've made my share of mistakes, too! but if you read even 1/3 of my profile, i would hope that you would get, "wassup?" isn't going to be a great opening line to me.
i still reply to the initial message but if you keep sending me messages, i will read/delete.
and nomexshrek - the "not interested" is perfect! but telling someone they are too tall/short/fat/skinny is a little mean - better to keep it a little vague otherwise they may never get the courage to write to another person for fear of such a response. | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 7/1/2008 6:59:09 AM | Him:
hey sweetheart you definetely caught my eye... I'd love to chat with you sometime and learn more about you...
wb
XXXXX
Me:
Hi XXXX,
I really appreciate your interest and am flattered. I am going to be honest with you. I am looking for someone a bit older. I wish you the best of luck in finding that perfect woman for you!
Sincerely,
XXXXX
Him:
WELL I JUST WANTED SHORT TERM ENCOUNTERS... HAHA
And people wonder why some women don't reply to all emails? | |
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| a Poll: After an initial contact, would you rather get a rejection email or none at all?
Posted: 7/1/2008 7:17:37 AM | | A rejection letter is best, but just so you know it immediately. If you are smart enough to come to the conclusion that they are not interested after two days of of not hearing from them, then it really doesn't matter either way, though. Rejection is rejection, regardless of how it's done. A shot in the arm at the doctor's is going to hurt as much whether you are watching them do it or if you're looking away. | |
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