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Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?      Home login  
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 myloves4ever
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 26
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?Page 2 of 6    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6)
when a man is attentive to a woman and says all those things that you inadvertently, spoken of, yes as the other guy said they think your a wussie, or to sensitive. i would a strong man they tell you, a bad boy, and when those strong bad boys abuse them and treat them like dirt, who do they want? guess?
most women have a double standard, as most men, i want a gemtlemen or a lady in my house , but i want a bad boy and freak in my bed, sorry doesn't work that way.
you get what you choose, you made your beds now lie in them! lol!
and you call this bs? or is it your choice at the time to deal with? right or wrong? the reason i say this because i hear this all the time, where all the good guys at? as the one guy said getting their hearts ripped out, by the same bs you just so graciously admitted. just to call and say hi! treat you as your special and a priority and not a necessity, it works both ways.
can't have your cake and eat it too! heard this before?
i'm one of those nice guys that gets thier heart ripped out, the differnce i won't let anyone change me, i'm secure enough with myself that serlf absorbed shallow women can't reached that side of me that is relentlous, a true romantic with a passion for love and life . that will not be supressed by such behavior.
and soon that woman that wants more then the average BS as you so well put it, will idenify with this nice guy who truly knows how to treat a lady and not a girl in heart and mind.
 niteelf1
Joined: 2/22/2006
Msg: 27
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Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/6/2006 12:12:54 PM
lol I remember being told that once I turned 40 it was all down hill. NEWSFLASH: the best thing that ever happened in my life after my son was turning 40. I love being in my 40's. Mind you my family says I am living my teenaged years that I didn't live at the time
But what do they know lol.

Enjoy every day for what it is. A chance to learn something new, to tell the ppl you love that you do love them and to live as though there won't be a tomorrow.
 anasyd64
Joined: 11/19/2004
Msg: 28
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/6/2006 6:12:45 PM
i am single again single at 41!i have been single for about 6 years and i think as adults,we look deeper into a man instead of just the outside.as a teen or maybe in our 20's we would put up with all the bull to have a good looking guy at our side.know what girls?it's not worth the trouble. as adults we are more careful about choosing who we date and probly a little more than skeptical with that,"really nice guy".afterall,the same old problems from past relationships could happen in to a new one,right?i know exactly what i want out of a relationship and from a man and if he can't give it to me... that's why this is called POF,right?
 myloves4ever
Joined: 1/21/2006
Msg: 29
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/7/2006 10:48:40 AM
i like that , but remember this when the hair gets gray and the body slips into just a little more pounds, and at that age of 60 plus, POF, won't help but a manthat really loves you and stand by you no matter how you look, because he loves you unconditionally !
 kindheart33
Joined: 8/24/2005
Msg: 30
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/7/2006 12:49:36 PM
This whole dating thing is new to me as I have been in two long relationships and now that I am single and over 30 I will be the first to say that I don't know what some expect. To me dating is being with only one woman that you are interested in as more than a friend. Just cause two single people are together doesn't really have to be a date. Whats wrong with just hanging out and enjoying each others company and getting to know each other. Does a date have to be dinner and drinks or can it just be something you both mutually enjoy and just spending time together. This whole dating thing can be frustrating at times but I also am having fun being single too. Have a good day all...
 molonel
Joined: 12/20/2005
Msg: 31
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/7/2006 11:06:13 PM
Most of what's been described here simply does not represent my experience. I spent most of my 20s married. I devoted most of that time to making someone else's dreams happen: paid off college debts, put her through graduate school, saw her through to her dream job. Then she took what she had, and walked.

My 30s, so far, kick total @ss. I've taken the dating world by storm. I have met fascinating women. Sex is awesome.

Has anyone else had this sort of a positive experience?
 babyblues302
Joined: 2/20/2006
Msg: 32
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 3/8/2006 6:24:01 AM
Why are grouping people again? This is simply not true for everyone. I thought I had a nice guy who told me everything I wanted to hear. Your beautiful, your sexy, I love you , I miss you blah blah blah. And you know what out of the other side of his mouth came you’re a *lut, ho, blah blah blah for absolutely no reason. I couldn’t understand what “I did “ to cause this behavior and put up with it for two years. There is a very fine line between love and control, and when I found out the difference (I still thank god everyday for this) I threw him out of my life. I to this day still have minor problems with this person re-appearing, but I have grown stronger and continue to keep him out of my life. I would not have considered him a bad boy and not a good boy either he fell somewhere in the middle of the two. I don’t want to be treated like dirt. At this point in my life I would settle for being treated as an equal. Respect me as I will respect you. Any man who is attentive, and “SINCERE” about it is OK in my book. Thank god for secure with yourself, as I am too.
 mrliverpool
Joined: 10/16/2006
Msg: 33
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/23/2006 8:01:55 AM
Maybe it is you who is too picky. Be honest do you just look at someone's picture first and say...I am going to block that person? Maybe that person would be the special guy you are looking for.
 xxnewgirlxx
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 34
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Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/23/2006 8:22:33 AM
I feel your pain. One day, I'm optimistic and have an open mind, and the next day, I'm so negative and I just don't care anymore. I just think "what's the point? It won't work out anyway". I'm trying to stay positive but it's not always easy, especially when it seems that all my friends are in relationships.

I always think of that line in "Sex and the City" when Charlotte says "I've been dating since I was 16...I'm exhausted! Where is he?"
 sparticuss
Joined: 5/9/2006
Msg: 35
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/23/2006 6:05:10 PM
Hottie
Go back and re read Nuv us and his post about 30 year olds conducting themselve with dignity an maturity. And knowging how to respect their partners.

Quite frankly the only 30 something women I know like that are very happily married. So hottie.
You re rread that post out loud. In front of a mirror! I dont' think it applies to you.

Thats why you are having trouble scoring dates.

You call it disrespct when he's so flat out that he doesn't have time to ring you and talk. FOR THREE HOURS. Forget the two minite hello. Thats a myth.

No hottie. The one thing I've always found is that the women who grizzlie about lack fo respect from men have no idea how to actually show respect towards men. In fact most of them have no concept of men being deserving of respct at all.

I've only known two types of women who can't get dates. Those who don't want them and those who don't deserve them
 Muffinfoot
Joined: 8/5/2006
Msg: 36
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Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/23/2006 9:49:48 PM
I am really enjoying dating in my thirties. My twenties were a blur of really crazy fun guys, but I never took any of them seriously. I've found that being a little older I look for more in a man than a nice ass and if he can keep up to me beer for beer! I'm actually starting to realize that there are some really decent men out there that I might consider dating for more than two months! Most of my dates in my twenties consisted of getting samashed and shagging. Now I actually want to talk to my dates? Crazy!
Maybe it's just that I'm starting to become a "grownup" now and a lot of people out there grew up at a very young age. I didn't have to think of anything but myself through my entire twenties.
I've never really put much thought into getting married and settling down, I just figure it will happen when it happens. I think maybe some people are frustrated because they've created expectations for their life and they are getting tired of waiting for their dreams to come true?

Dating in your thirties IS fun - If you make it fun!
 mus1cman
Joined: 1/6/2006
Msg: 37
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/23/2006 11:36:32 PM
I am still puzzled as to why I am single. I was never single in Montreal.
Calgary sucks for dating/meeting REALLY nice people.

JMO
 Lukewarmguy
Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 38
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/24/2006 10:23:58 PM
(QUOTE)--> Many of us who were "sweet, caring, attentive guys" had our hearts ripped out of our chests one too many times and kinda gave up, or have been heavily and unfairly ridiculed for being "wussies". <--(QUOTE)

Damn dude, you soooooo hit the nail on the head...supurb reply. ;)

...sometimes the "hearts ripped out" thing just knocks guys like me down so far, that theres just no getting up anymore...

~Robbie~
 star searcher
Joined: 12/18/2005
Msg: 39
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/24/2006 10:53:28 PM
u should of kept the nice guy that called you everyday some other girl got him at about age 27 and married him.
 andyw3000
Joined: 10/7/2006
Msg: 40
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 4:20:04 AM
dont worry about it,or before you know it you will be 40.....
 who_the_fox
Joined: 4/29/2005
Msg: 41
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 5:29:24 AM
Don't worry about dating after 30....it is nothing at all compared to trying to date after 50.
 misseyes
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 42
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 8:14:05 AM
Thanks, Fox, you're soooooooooooooooo helpful. I'll remember this one. And dating at any age, is a pain in the tushie!
 Melody4U
Joined: 10/4/2006
Msg: 43
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 6:22:41 PM
I will say it seems difficult to meet available men. Many people are married in their 30's. I would say it's just harder to meet someone attractive after you've had your heartbroken.
 rf900flyer
Joined: 9/13/2006
Msg: 44
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 7:02:43 PM
With a name like hottie what do you expect?
 m68
Joined: 2/12/2005
Msg: 45
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Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 7:20:06 PM
Well we are still out here..the guys who call just to say hi and to hear your voice,and love it when you call just to say hi too! If you feel there is bs then don't waste your time calling them..if someone really cares about you then to hear your voice should put a smile on their face and make their day!
 lilredbug
Joined: 3/13/2006
Msg: 46
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 10:43:09 PM
dating?
I thought I was hunting?
alas...led astray again.

But truly,

I think MEETING people/potential dates is the real challenge post twenties. I assume all of us are busy with careers, (read: trying to pay all those bills that couples have ... solo), hanging with family and friends, (translation: occupying time with married people...a vicarious living but now a reality), and so on. Suddenly you realise that you are the single one, the ONLY single
I read somewhere that most people meet their mate at the workplace. For all us business savy owners and operators...until we can reach through our monitors and yank a few dates out of the database...sigh...I know there are tons of great men 'out there', in there 30's and single for whatever reasons. I just do not know how to get to the 'out there' to find them!!
Specially when I am in here!
 romegaguy
Joined: 9/17/2006
Msg: 47
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/25/2006 11:33:34 PM
OP you really sound bitter with our experience with men. I think most of us been in your shoes on time or another but life goes on you just have to leave your past experience behind and move on. I think its true that when you are in your 30's just finding someone to date or even someone to fall in love is twice as hard. What makes it worse is if you've been married before and in your 30's that just makes things more challenging.
 trentalor
Joined: 4/15/2006
Msg: 48
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/28/2006 1:06:00 PM
I've given up thinking about it. It the same old same old. Every girl on this website wants a nice guy, but is affraid to try a nice guy. I think that the challenge to try to change him is complete so they don't need to work on it. I've heard the same crap for so many years I just turned off my caring meter and went on with my life. One day a lucky girl will get what she deserves from me, but until then I'm not holding my breath.
 whoops62
Joined: 10/2/2006
Msg: 49
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/29/2006 1:55:52 AM
ohhh i am early 30s what you saying is it too old for me to go and find someone - i am more confident but only begun the dating thing recently after a rel finished - i didnt want to settle and i wasnt ready to in my last 20 so am i wrong in my decision?

Early 30s is okay i think - work play etc takes up time so we shoul dhav nofear
 highlander2007
Joined: 7/29/2006
Msg: 50
Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?
Posted: 10/29/2006 9:15:05 AM
I agree with trentalor, women on here seem too afraid to even strike up a conversation, I am not looking to score with everyone on this site, I am 43, just recently divorced, my ex forced my friends away from me over the years, we never went out, so my expectations are low, I want to strike up conversations, make friends, and maybe go from there, but many seem to think you are an axe murderer, a pervert, grandpa jones, ect...

Take two minutes and get to know a person.... then decide...Thats all I say...
Show ALL Forums  > Over 30  > Frustrated with the whole dating after turning 30?