| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/8/2006 2:40:52 PM | um um um CARGASUM............................if u email me ...rest assured I would do MORE than just say ' hello' or something silly like that.
You're a cutie.......................too bad ur only looking for Friends?
cheers everyone | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/13/2006 3:16:02 AM | | And see i have returned the message lol. why thank you great eyes.. i'm flattered i'll e-mail you . And for the people that put there noses high in the air ...careful ya might fall on you butt lol t/c everyone | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/13/2006 7:32:56 PM | That's one of my pet peeves. I get a lot of guys IMing me and they have nothing to say!
At first, I would keep the conversation going by asking questions or what not. And then I just got to the point where I couldn't be bothered. You messaged me, YOU say something. So usually, after the hi, how are yas. Nothing more is said and I close the window.
It drives me up the f'in wall. | |
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debss
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Joined: 12/2/2005
Msg: 105 | |
| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/13/2006 7:47:41 PM | | Yes the lack of words is very frustrating, what's even worse is when they do when you meet up for a coffee. Ends up being like a job interview just one word answers and i end up doing all the talking. Things that make you go hmmmm | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/14/2006 6:27:46 PM | hey Lavachic................geez..i'm wondering where u got your nickname from..
You get lots of IM...wow..that's kewl I guess....
I on the other hand dont' really get alot of IM....I wonder if it is becasue my IM is set to NOT ACCEPT THEM.........LOL LOL
Personally IM is a hit n miss here...I love it when it says "connecting" for about h alf an hour
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on a serious note ladies...I personally have NEVER had a problem with meeting anyone who had little conversation skills or had the personality of a door knob in person.
I take credit in the fact that I kinda "screen" potentials out early on.
Step 1
I may exchance a few emails (and a few not 15....u can learn alot through emails)
Step 2
Then I want to speak with them on the phone. If I feel that there is no "connection" ..I won't even bother to suggest a face to face meeting.
Sorry...........but I have always been BANG ON..
Good luck to all .... | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/14/2006 6:31:36 PM |
hey Lavachic................geez..i'm wondering where u got your nickname from..
Not where you think, I'm sure. LOL.
Like so many things in my life it's a mutation of a mutation - and me poking fun at myself. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/14/2006 6:42:41 PM | jojoeygirl,
I agree some oeople arent so good on a keyboard are prefer to talk on the phone
,but i also agree with joschmo,some people just cant hold a conversation either and it is like talking to a brick | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/15/2006 11:49:54 AM | where is JOe Schmo????
Hey dude..u started this party ....................................
maybe he met someone who CAN ACTUALLY HOLD A CONVERSATION !! | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/15/2006 12:18:14 PM | Funny you mention that, i did. I thought this thread had died a few days ago so i forgot about it. Glad to see everyone is in agreement about this conversation thing. But lets keep something in mind. While there are some quality, normal people inhabiting this site and others, there are still many social 'tards out there who leave much to be desired and we've all met our fair share of those.
I think some of these people simply have no clue and figure that all they have to do online is show up and say hi and someone will do the work. Not me. You gotta give a little to get a little. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:44:41 PM | I have encountered the same problem with guys..seems most of them first of all, cannot spell and their grammar is horrible! I'm not looking for Einstein - just someone who knows the difference between "their and there"...der...
As far as intelligent conversation I had an interesting encounter with someone the other day. He said he "loved to read". So I wrote back and said "what was the last book you read and why did you read it?" Is that a difficult question?? He still hasn't answered me...der... | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 7/8/2006 6:14:14 AM | | Amazing, isn't it?? I call it "selfish, self-centerdness, that is the root of our problem"...in other words, how many times have you seen (in writing) "get to know me" from the other person? How about "I'm not the center of the Universe and would enjoy getting to know YOU" - IT'S NOT ALL ABOUT ME!! I understand what you are saying, Tina | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/17/2006 2:40:01 PM | I had to search out this thread topic as I was discussing it with a man who certainly CAN converse today...
I love to talk to people but one of the reasons I don't readily add people to my MSN is because I find that if I do that - most of them expect me to carry the conversation. And while I am quite capable of it, I prefer my conversations the way I prefer my sex... with give and take, with a balance between leading and following and with both people connecting rather than one having to do all the work!
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/17/2006 3:04:26 PM | If you're not getting a conversation from someone, there could be several possibilities:
1. They have no clue who you are.
2. They have many chats going at once.
3. They aren't interested.
4. They are not conversationalists.
5. They are shy.
6. They are boring.
7. They lack intelligence.
There are lots of people who are great at conversing and are opposite of any and/or all of the reasons I stated. Go talk to them! There's no reason you have to continually try to make something happen that in all likelihood is not going to happen. Time to move on!
For the record, I respond to all messages whether I'm interested or not. I think everyone deserves to know if you should continue to talk or move on to someone else. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/17/2006 3:30:47 PM | Pooljewel...I would tend to say that is a decent list. Sometimes we assume the other side is just stupid/boring/or a number of other things.
That being said though...Wow...Some people ARE just horrible at conversation. It's frustrating to try and communicate with another person and they have nothing to contribute to the conversation. What I find fascinating is that...If you just met me how on earth could you be running low on things to talk to me about? I understand shyness...But very rarely have I encountered a person that has a hard time making conversation to start with that improves over time as we get to know each other. Usually a lack of conversation skills right off the bat is a decent sign for me not to invest a lot of time in that person.
Let me add some other little things that are frustrating: 1. People that use "Im going 2 r u?" 2. Responding with one word answers....Especially after you just got done typing a well thought out question or thought. 3. This is directed at IM's....When you see someone is typing and it takes about a month for them to finish what they are typing...Only to have it end up to be one sentence.
Conversation is so important to me. I went ahead and mentioned the ability to hold a conversation as important in my profile.
BTW...I love how old threads like this get brought up again.  | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/18/2006 9:09:36 PM | | I agree with you Van. You would think that with the Internet you would have to have more to discuss, not less. Don't people realize that the abilty to converse is what a friendship/relationship is all about? Its so depressing when you have to pull a conversation out of someone who writes inane two or three word sentences and isn't really trying to connect. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/18/2006 9:44:43 PM | What I find frustrating, is when you actually engage someone with questions. And then they reply without answering any of them. And you're thinking, did they even read my fuk'n email? And I'm not talking about first contact either
SUBLIME
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/30/2006 8:55:29 PM | | I get toungue tied when meeting new people.I can't seem to type well enough to respond.Fact i suck in grammar.Being un educated does not help matters.You can be smart in all areas but nothing to show for when it comes to conversation.Although when i get very upset somehow i can get my wits together.I don't want to get to that point.I might say something i will soon regret. | |
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weena
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Joined: 7/21/2006
Msg: 119 | |
| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/30/2006 9:19:55 PM | In person: if people greet me with apprehension and not a high degree of friendliness and openness (people in general scare me) - I've a tendency to and most likely will clam up.
Although i'm painfully shy, I'm actually quite a good conversationalist (I'll talk about anything and everything once you get me going), it just takes someone else pushing me to talk and then if they open up first, give a little, and let me think that I can let my guard down, I'll respond in kind.
WRT the computer/'net as a forum, I think that there is very little excuse to be so closed-mouthed. I mean, you have minutes, hours, days to respond to a profile/email you like - you can't think of anything to say? Can't come up wiht someting better than "hi, read your profile. You sound kewl, email me"? | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/30/2006 9:24:20 PM | | I greet back but i tend to find it's way to kill the fuel of conversation.I'm not a very talkative type i like to read and observe rather than run my mouth. | |
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weena
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Joined: 7/21/2006
Msg: 121 | |
| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/30/2006 9:28:31 PM | | with the right people, I'm very talkative. depends on the comfort level...plus most of my friends are absolute mouthpieces/chatterboxes. Non-stop...it's very rare that I will have friends that speak less than I do, because it's too much effort for me to drag them out to speak, when it's not in my nature to make people talk. I'm usually the listener, but get me going, rile me up and you can't shut me up. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/31/2006 1:17:29 AM | It seems that a lot of the problem people are having is the person they are conversing with do not ask questions. I have had this problem before with people because I am naturally inquisitive and will even ask people questions that I am not even interested in.
Well, my curiousity about this got the better of me, so I approached a communications professor (told you, I am inquisitive). I asked the communications professor if these people are selfish, uninterested, or unintelligent. He said there is a good chance they are neither. Most likely, he went on, these people are being submissive to you. That is, they do not ask questions because they want you to dictate the flow of the conversation. This could be due to their personality, because they are nervous or various other reasons. He then went on to say that if it is persistent, then it might be that they lack certain social skills, as question-asking is something people are socialized to do. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/31/2006 1:35:18 AM | I might be over simplifying this...but why worry about whether someone can hold a conversation with you or not? The ones that can, are worth talking to...the ones that can't....aren't. If you're not on the same wavelength, its gonna show in how you communicate. Whether its online or in person is irrelevant. Sooner or later you'll know if you're on the same page.
Try not to stress kids. | |
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weena
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Joined: 7/21/2006
Msg: 124 | |
| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/31/2006 6:25:04 AM | that's the problem I have movingonward - that I suffer from. can't hold a conversation wtih someone who is less communicative than me. Someone has to keep the conversation running...if neither is willing to take the reins - it dies.
I'm naturally curious, but if the person who I'm talking with is less communicative and doesn't want to answer, I can only ask so many questions and work so hard. Sounds kind of hypocritical of me, but when I'm asked questions, I give more than one sentence answers, becaseu i realize that they really want to hear what I think. | |
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| People who can't hold a conversation
Posted: 8/31/2006 6:58:34 AM | Yeah, putting in effort is the key. I get alot of emials on POF saying stuff like "Hi, I like your profile, wanna chat?".... When I respond to the email and ask for more info about the person, I can't tell you how many times i get the "Just call me and I'll tell you whatever you want to know" response. Um, NO......How bout You tell me about yourself, you contacted me...It's called communicating....
I don't generally call men that I've had no dailogue with, that's how you learn what that person is about.....
I think it's people just wanting to hook up and also alot of laziness. | |
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