| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 2:04:12 PM | | Thanks for the compliment...but sorry:am a selfmade man, I do not take anything from anyone, and use only what i worked for. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 2:24:31 PM | A lot of replies here are assuming shallowness is a factor here (although I'll point out the original question had nothing to do with what KIND of car someone drives, just simply if they drive).
For me it's simply convenience/give and take. I can totally understand not having a car if you live in a major metropolitan area like toronto or montreal with an extensive public transportation system, no parking and traffic nightmares, but if you live anywhere in suburbia, that's not so much of an option.
So for the partner in a relationship that does have a car (be it a guy or a girl) the onus of transportation lands on their shoulders. So they always have to go pick up the other person, always have to drive wherever they're going, always have to be the DD, always have to take the other person home ... that's a lot of responsibility for one person.
So, it's not a "turn off" per se, as I wouldn't be judging that person's attractiveness etc, but would be a reason for me not to pursue a relationship with someone, in the same way that i wouldn't date someone who lived a couple hours from me. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 5:12:24 PM | Interesting thread to read in all honesty. Alot of different opinions, and alot of people forgetting what the first question was.
I would not hold it against someone if they didn't drive. It's simply a fact of life that some people don't. I'm in my 30's, and I don't drive. It's that simple. Never had to get my license, never wanted to get my license, and never been judged by it. It does require me to think about things more for an evening, like planning out a limo ride, or cab fare, or meeting somewhere even. THings is, I love to treat a woman right when she allows me to. If she wants to drink with dinner, or at a bar then I'll make sure she gets home safe.
It's pretty simple isn't it?
And before someone bothers to ask, the main reason I don't have a license is the legal hassle concerning citizenship - especially since 9/11 caused all sorts of headaches to people that have immigrant status and not citizenships. Long story - if you want the details, pm me.
-Tej | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 5:59:58 PM | EXACTLY, princess!
To the chap who wrote this:
.Ladies, do you judge the man or the car..?....What he drives or doesn't drive shouldn't impact your feelings...remember your heartfelt feelings.
Um, hello, McFly? This top is not about *WHAT* a guy drives (shaking head) - if you look up, yes way up, you'll see the topic is: Turn off when guys don't drive?
I couldn't give a crap what a guy drives - so long as it's road-safe, fairly clean inside and has heat that works. That's it.
The reasons many have listed for not being impressed with a guy who doesn't have a car/doesn't drive relates SPECIFICALLY due to the fact that it's a freakin' inconvenience for the gal who dates him - she has to pick him up and take him home, she has to always be the designated driver, if she invites him over to her place she has to pick him up and take him home - that might be fine when you're 18 but when you're in your 20s and 30s and upward,it's a pain in the butt and silly. Now I can understand if someone has Medical reasons that they can't have a license or can't drive - that's altogether different - but we're clearly discussing guys who have LOST their license (due to stupidity), or they're financial dingalings and can't afford insurance or gas or to even buy themself a modest beater.
And commonsens, we get it - some people who live in larger metropolitan areas that have easy access to public transportation don't need a vehicle - yes, that makes sense....but many of us don't live in large metro areas - some live in places where they don't even have taxis. I live in a city of 27,000 that's 15 minutes to Calgary and there's no bus that runs into Calgary ............. some people need to have a vehicle, and they don't appreciate dating someone who they have to be a chauffeur to. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 6:33:55 PM | Quote ;
Well I'm 38, have had a vehicle and have been driving since I was 16. I date guys in the age range of 32-43. I can't even imagine dating a guy in this age group who doesn't drive/doesn't
Well , I am 39 and fit that description exactly
Actually dad taught me to drive when I was 14, when I was 15 me and 2 other pals were involved in an accident(no I was not driving) one had his face permanently disfigured another
had his left leg amputated below the knee..I was sitting in the back and escaped with a few bruises....I have no problem getting into a car...but the minute I take the wheel i get panic attacks......so I take the cab,train whatever...but I am fortunate to have friends who love to chaffeur me around....LOL
But I state clearly on my profile that I dont drive or have a license,
so if it was a dealbreaker for someone , she should simply not contact me. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 6:47:50 PM | carribeanking,
I'm sorry that you had to go through that, I'm sure you still have awful memories. Like I wrote up above though, I think it's a different case when the person doesn't drive due to medical reasons - and the reason you describe is more than understandable. I think a lot of us are referring to those who have lost their license due to irresponsibility or stupidity, or they can't afford insurance for the same reasons (rates sky high due to many moving violations/accidents, etc).
Have you ever sought counselling to help you work through your panic attacks? | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 6:55:35 PM | Yes I have, I am told the problem is psychological, but have not been able to pull thru yet,
the irony is I myself am a volunteer cousellor, I counselled troubled teens for 2 years...
Who knows, if my recent business ventures flourish 5 years down the road , i might even get a Limo with chaffeur and all | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 7:21:44 PM | talk about a lack of feminism around here, basic common sense first:
1)never go out with a any person and take them in your vehicle-safety first
2)why is it that MEN are responsible for our transportation? Who was responsible BEFORE you met him?
3) if in the course of getting to know someone (please note lack of gender-specific) that in their background is a lack of responsibility, immaturity or other crimes and misdemeanors then get the hell out of the relationship.
All of this applies to both sexes, no wonder men have a fear of commitment, try being an adult woman, and showing other women how to do it with class.
Oh, and guys, if we complain we are not on the rag -shudder- why in the world any woman would debase herself with a man who says those kind of things?
But...........on a humorus note I did appreciate the heated leather seat thang.... | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 7:30:08 PM | TomiJay:
2)why is it that MEN are responsible for our transportation? Who was responsible BEFORE you met him?
I must have missed it because I don't recall reading anywhere in this thread where any woman was saying that a guy should drive because he's responsible for her transportation. Seems to me that the majority of women who think it's a turn-off for a man not to drive have already indicated that they HAVE their own set of wheels. The issue is that if you date a guy who doesn't drive, you'll always be expected to drive to his place because for hiim to get to yours (not talking on date #2, I'm talking down the line), you'd have to pick him up and drive him home. Or what if you wanted to take a day trip somewhere to check out the sites - guess who's always going to be driving? The gal. In my last job, I did tons of driving - the last thing I wanted to do on my weekends was more than I had to. Why should I put all that wear and tear on my vehicle for someone who doesn't have one? Then what about the cost of gas? - gas isn't cheap. Now I'm not about keeping a log but some people are cheap and you'd do all the driving and you'd be footing the cost of gas all the time.
I live in a smaller city outside of a large city. To date a guy who didn't drive, the only way we'd be able to see each other would be for me to have to drive into the big city to see him. Crap, I put in a long day - I don't want to do that.....at least let's meet halfway..but that won't work if he doesn't drive.
This isn't about women wanting a guy with wheels she she's got a taxi, it's about not wanting to become one herself.
And yes, I agree that when you first meet someone, a gal should take her own car - but as you get to know someone, if you begin to trust them, there's nothing wrong with them picking you up. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 7:30:52 PM | Quote :
1)never go out with a any person and take them in your vehicle-safety first
Yes I agree, initial meetings should be at a public place, never homes or vehicles , better be safe than sorry.
sometime back I met someone on here, after a brief email exchange we decided to meet,
as usual I picked a public place , an hour before we were to meet she changed plans and asked me to wait at the train station where she picked me up,
I told her what she was doing was not safe, she nonchallantly said that she knew me well from the mail-when I told her you can never be sure...she jokingly told me not to worry
she would not rape me....LOL | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 8:40:08 PM |
.....she changed plans and asked me to wait at the train station where she picked me up, I told her what she was doing was not safe...
Wait a minute, you actually told a woman it was not safe for her to pick you up at the train station instead of a more public place and she met you anyway? Stupid girl! | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 8:48:40 PM | | It wold be a turn off the wrong exit if the guy had no driver's license. But I am headed to NY for design school. If I was dating someone who lived in the city I could see why he would not have a car. It would be too much hassle to drive and park a car in the city. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/6/2006 8:52:56 PM | Quote :
Wait a minute, you actually told a woman it was not safe for her to pick you up at the train station instead of a more public place and she met you anyway? Stupid girl!
Nope I told her what she was doing was not safe when I got into the car,
nah she;s not stupid..just overwhelmed by my charm maybe | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/7/2006 6:28:15 AM | I may be mistaken, but I think she means mean who don't drive due to lack of money or are blocked from driving for some stupid reason. Some cant drive due to medication they are on for a life threatening illness which doesnt allow driving, accidents, alcohol/drugs etc.
Where I live you NEED to drive. Life is very difficult if you can't! So a guy here w/o a license and car is not an asset and I most likely wouldn't date him. I dont care what kind of car someone has. Rich people drive junkers. Poor people go into debt to drive expensive cars. So the car alone means nothing. But I am not driving someone around because they made poor decisions. I'm not the taxi. I did that for one guy who said his car was in the shop! Yeah, right! Learned that lesson well!
You just need to know the full circumstances on WHY they dont drive and go from there. Knowledge and wisdom is powerful! | |
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Hezron
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Joined: 12/15/2005
Msg: 118 | |
| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/7/2006 7:31:10 AM | | Be the change you want to see. i hear so many people paying lip service to the oil industry questions, the environmental degradation of our planet...but a car is still a psychological neccessity for most women. I know a ton of guys who's main reason for having a car is to date. For me the bottom line is...if you don't need a cardon't have one. Just my beleifs. if you are in a major metro it is silly to have one. The sad things is many places do not have any type of appropriate infrastructure to insure people have the option. My car died last January and I am in a position where I can walk to work (i hour). Since the car died I have lost 30 pounds :) When I want to go on a date if she wants to drive fine...but that means i pay for the date (she had the gas expense ect) If she does not have a car then we can transit and meet or even better...i will pay for a cab...then you can drink :) Just some thoughts...but there definitely are women who will not date if you don't have wheels. This i accept...I know that is how things are and I accept the consequences. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/7/2006 9:39:10 AM | of course it is a big turn off in the US.
in America "what do you drive?" is among the top3 questions you are asked if you meet somebody.
I had a female friend travelling in the US, and once, when she was asked, she replied:
-I drive an Ikarus.
-Oh, we don1t know that. Is it bigger than a Chevrolet?
-Oh yes, much bigger!
Well, it's a type of bus that is used for public transport | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/7/2006 9:43:34 AM | When my car's a mess, I call it my Slaab
If I cry in the car its a Saab story
What kind of Swedish car does a Navy Sailor buy? A SWAAB!
GM RULES!! Chevy & Saab forever! | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/7/2006 10:26:30 AM | I can imagine it being a turn off, like someone said if they cant drive a long distance relationship is out of the question.
As for me I LOVE driving when I used to drive 407 miles to see my ex girl friend those 6 hours were awesome roflmao I guess that makes me weird. I cant imagine not driving I'm 19 and Ive been driving since 14 . I find driving relaxing.
as for bumming a ride off of someone Ive had to do it and honestly I HATE it, its such a lame feeling so, I prefer to drive unless you want to then i'll let you. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/12/2006 5:45:14 PM | Simple, my lungs are damaged by a chemical inhaled in a third world shit-hole. Even the the smokers odor that smokers have shuts down my breathing. Sorry if I offended you!
MOI | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/12/2006 5:47:14 PM | | At almost 23, I don't have my license yet. Just haven't bothered. So no, it's not a turn off if a guy doesn't drive. I'm interested in him, the person. | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/12/2006 6:01:46 PM | | ^^ Yeah but what if a guy was tired of doing all the driving for you? When you go out to do things, do you give him gas money, meet him half way, take a cab? | |
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| Turn off when guys dont drive??
Posted: 3/12/2006 6:24:53 PM | My pals sometimes chaffeur me around...but I dont take them for granted...
ive been known to pay to fill up tanks "full" for a journey less than 30km.....
On long distance journeys I cannot take turns driving bu
I can change flats, wipe the windshield, provide stimulating conversation, make a good bodyguard and also give good shoulder massages...LOL | |
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