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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/2/2006 6:19:54 PM | | I am new at this and have problems conversing on the computer. How to get the most from a conversation? How to find out if the contact is a good match or not? Also, can you review my profile, should some of the information on my profile be change on occassion? Thanks. Appreciate a reply. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/2/2006 10:56:58 PM | SORRY about the rant!!!! lol..... take care :P
other wise if ya wanna tell me what you think great.... | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 8:52:48 AM | Holy smokes! I turn my back for a day and look at this backlog.. bring it on!
Annbela: I'd be delighted to. Don't take that remark the wrong way. 
You have a very forthright and blunt writeup here. I think overall it's quite good and I can only see a few things that I would suggest altering. First off is your first sentence. I would scrap it altogether. Whether you like 'about me' sections or not, you have to write one so you may as well make it the best you can! But you don't want the first impression of yours to be "it's cack".
Beyond that, you seem to have a real affinity for semicolons, but I think they get a little overused. You! might? want: to, (vary) your; punctuation. Just a thought.
Your first date idea(s) sound pretty good to me, though I wouldn't include the part about knowing who Al Green is, personally. I think even I would go on a date just to see a guy snort mayo though. Sounds kinda funny.
Alright, there you go - that's as honest as they come! Good luck with it. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 8:57:25 AM | sweetpea: That's what I'm here for. 
It's short and sweet and to the point. Although I usually encourage a BIT more detail (just to give your readers something to read), it's not essential and ends up being a matter of personal taste. Just one question: is there nothing else you want in a partner besides the ability to make you laugh? It's worth considering and might give you something else to add to your writeup.
Your first date idea sounds great, and I don't think I have anything to add to that at all.
Photos? The one you have up is not bad, though more than just a face shot would be nice to see as well. What else do you have in your collection?
Have fun with it, and good luck. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 9:07:22 AM | Diana2006: Ohhh my, that's a load of questions to answer. Not my usual line of advice, but I'll see if I can offer some good advice.
Re. conversations: Unlike writing a profile, I usually approach conversations just as I would face-to-face. In my mind, that's the best way to go about it. If you wouldn't want to have the same conversation in person that you're having online, that's a pretty good indicator that you need either a change of topic or a change of person. Just be yourself - sounds simplistic but that's the best way to tackle it.
A good match? There's no hard and fast trick. You either get a good vibe or you don't. If the person you're talking to comes off as someone you'd like to get to know better, then do so. If it seems like they have something to hide, then cut them loose. Your best tool here is instincts and time. Nobody needs to be in a rush with this stuff - if they try to convince you otherwise, politely but firmly invite them to take a long walk off a short pier.
And finally .. a profile review. No problem. You have a pretty good one going. The only thing I suggest changing is that it reads like a bit of a list rather than a written piece of work. By that I'm referring to sentences like "Don't mind getting my hair wet, my feet wet, can bait my own fishing line and play 18 holes of golf." I would suggest using "I" a bit more, so that it reads: "I don't mind getting my hair wet, or my feet wet. I can bait my own fishing line and play 18 holes of golf." It just comes off easier to read that way.
Otherwise, I wouldn't change anything. Just be patient, be yourself and have fun with it. Best of luck. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 9:12:54 AM | lookin4love: That's not a bad profile you have as it is, so I won't spend a whole lot of time reviewing your writing. Just one thing I suggest changing: insert your cursor right at the start of the sentence that begins "I am looking to find", and hit the enter key twice. That's all.
What I would suggest punching up is your photos. You have three that are essentially the same here. You would do well to replace 2 of them with photos of you in a different surrounding.. give us some variety. As well, they are very dark and don't give a really great look at your face. The trick with webcam photography is lighting. Don't count on the window behind you to provide it.. it's better to have a desk lamp or something like that shining on your face - it really improves the quality of the shot.
That's all I have at the moment! Best of luck to you. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 9:16:22 AM | Sexytatty: Alright, on we go to a review of your actual profile. I have to say, it still comes off sounding like a rant - you spend almost all of it telling off people that have already contacted you. I have 2 major suggestions:
1. Turn off the caps lock.
2. Speak to people you WANT to hear from that haven't contacted you yet. A profile shouldn't be about reacting to the ones you HAVE heard from but didn't want to.
Give it a shot and see what happens! Happy hunting.. :-) | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 9:18:50 AM | Parksie,
I like that you are giving constructive, rather than destructive criticism. You seem very friendly and approachable. You've given me courage to ask you if you would provide me with some feedback on how to shape up my profile.
Keep up the good work!
geeklover | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 9:20:20 AM | | Vallarta: WOAH! That's a lot of writing. Seriously though.. it's hard to follow. It really, honestly sounds like you WERE on a 5-day binge when you wrote it - were you? ;-) Your sense of humour is obvious and that is probably getting you a good following - no problem, as long as that's what you're looking for. Definitely good for a laugh though. I hope you're having fun with it! | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:26:41 PM | lonewife: Well, the idea is good but I think your execution could do with a little punching up. It almost sounds like a newspaper classified where you're limited to so many words. You know.. snow tires low mileage good condition please call.
You can SURELY do better! Use some periods, and expand on what you've put there! You aren't a tire.. I saw your photos before you took them down, so I can say that. Talk about yourself, even just a little bit, and maybe a brief (yet discreet) description as well.
I can understand your lack of photos (now), which adds to the importance of a good writeup. You need to attract attention to yourself. I'm sure you can - let me know later on if you want another opinion. Good luck in the meantime! | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:34:24 PM | brittany: I'm always nice! I defy you to find a review I've written that was mean.
But I digress.
It looks good so far, but there's really very little to go on! We all want to have fun (I hope?), and beyond that all we know about you is that you want to go to movies and travel. I'm convinced there's more to you than that. It would be nice to read about some of it. I would suggest not a rewrite, but that you open the door on yourself. Attract some attention with your words - the rest ought to fall into place afterwards.
Good pix, on the other hand. They should generate the initial interest. The rest, m'lady, is up to you. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:46:58 PM | geeklover: Sure, I'll give you some feedback. Just please don't tell my students that I'm nice - I want them to stay afraid of me.
Onwards, then.
On the whole, it's pretty good. You sum yourself up well and I think that there's alot to like here. You even spell and punctuate things properly, which is definitely worth brownie points. So let's take it a step further. Devote a little bit to your ideal match - I haven't given this advice in a while but I think it's worth the time here. Be careful though, that you describe who you ARE looking for, not who you want to leave you alone.
On to your first date, it sounds just fine. I don't drink coffee either. One thing I'd double check if I were you.. are you "weary" or "wary" of those kinds of men? Weary being 'tired of', and wary being 'cautious of'. It makes a difference! Of course, maybe you're both weary AND wary of them. Who knows.
Your one pic is good, so why not try a few more? A different pose, angle, outfit, location, something like that.
Best of luck to you and have fun with it. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 3:41:31 PM | | OK.....I just posted my profile today. Let me know what I can improve. Thanks | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 5:58:58 PM | delightful: Well, I've given it a careful look and some thought, and truthfully you did pretty well on the first draft. I only have a few suggestions for improvement, and I would say they are fairly minor.
1. Expand on your first paragraph. Tell us a little more about yourself. It needn't be a tell-all, but should give your readers a reasonable idea of who you are. You choose exactly what you want to share with the world - I wouldn't presume to be an expert on what makes a good 'all about me'.
2. The first sentence of your second paragraph needs a rewrite, in my humble opinion. Try copying in the following: My match should not be afraid to try new things, and definitely needs to be adventurous (or adventuresome, you choose).
Beyond that, you might post a few more photos. You may have seen this same comment in other posts I've put up? One or two more would do the trick.
Fair enough? Welcome aboard here, in case nobody has said it already, and good luck to you.  | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 6:09:40 PM | velvetsteel: I have to confess that this kind of profile doesn't really work for me. It's all quoted and borrowed, and while the words may reflect who you are and how you feel, they are still not you. I would suspect that a good number of potential matches wouldn't even get to the end of that poem - it's just too long. I would suggest starting fresh, with words that are your own and don't take as long to read through.
The same (or similar) suggestion goes for your first date idea. It's a nice sentiment, but it doesn't say anything about what you consider to be a good first date, which is the entire point of the segment.
This may not be what you were expecting to hear and if so, I apologize. I'd be happy to give another review at a later date, if you decide to take my suggestions. That, of course, is up to you. Best of luck. | |
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| Ladies, let me review you!
Posted: 4/3/2006 6:15:39 PM | Thanks for the constructive criticism. As I am a full-fledge newbie to the online scene, I had no idea what to write :? I guess it's time to pull back the curtain and reveal the real me! I'll let you know when I update it.
Thanks again! | |
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