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 slinkey8
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 158
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?Page 7 of 7    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7)
having bad sex is a good reason unless thay are trainable
 slinkey8
Joined: 4/12/2006
Msg: 159
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/14/2006 12:28:37 AM
i love shaven! i also shave down below!
 Migi
Joined: 12/20/2005
Msg: 160
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/14/2006 12:30:55 AM
If it's nothing that can be resolved with more practice & discovering eachothers styles and bodies, then YES! Definately YES!
 Sversion1
Joined: 12/7/2005
Msg: 161
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/14/2006 5:04:57 AM
Yup, up to a certain point u try, but then like a good boxing manager, you have to know when to throw in the towel. Ideally you hope your significant other and you have natural chemistry...if everytime, just for it to be good is a huge challenge/test....no good.

I tried that once....it got to the point where I dreaded having sex (and she always wanted it)....can u imagine that, thats when u know u have to bow out.
 xxx2931
Joined: 2/26/2006
Msg: 162
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/14/2006 7:19:32 AM
let me ask you a question ladies...since it is always a lady asking this question....is it ALL the responsibility of the MAN to make sex GOOD.....I thought that sex involved 2 people..if it is always the woman complaining then maybe they should shoulder some of the blame here..MOST men are scared to death about being BAD at sex or being that partner that Sweet Sensations talks about...in fact MANY men WANT to be that STUD that SHE BRAGS ABOUT...so as he says in Jerry Mcguire...HELP ME HELP YOU...would you want us as men to just let you fumble around with our c ocks or be bad in bed and then go post some forum on a website about how BAD you were...or would you rather help out...or take the bull by the horns and make sex good.....I realize there are sometimes that it might not get better...but I am just tired of hearing the complaining...most women would rather complain about it then fix it and help their partners out..MOST MEN WANT TO PLEASE YOU...but you know your bodies better than we do...so communicate......listen the FACTS ARE SIMPLE..Many of us have NO IDEA HOW TO PLEASE someone the first or second or third time we have sex with themm..WE ARE ALL DIFFERENT and like different things..sex is not just INSERT PART A IN HOLE B..ok? get a grip..more to it...WAY MORE...but it takes 2...and believe me Ladies ALOT OF A MANS PERFORMANCE IS BASED UPON HOW SEXY YOU ARE TO HIM....we are the physical creatures here...you ladies are the mental creatures....so BE MORE SEXY...in fact not only that ASK HIM WHAT TURNS HIM ON THE MOST...and vice versa men.....that part ofg sex should be SIMPLE and make it far more enjoyable for everyone...QUIT COMPLAINING....ENJOY..!!!! that is what it is for...it is not an item to RATE....come on...LOL..that is what American Idol is for ..if you wanna RATE something wathc that TV show and vote for you RATE the best
 molly__blooming
Joined: 4/6/2006
Msg: 163
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Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/14/2006 8:38:26 PM
xxx2931, i think it goes without saying that good sex happens because of two people and is obviously not shouldered by the man alone. no way. i agree completely. but, i think there are people, men and women, who are just not that into sex, or just not very physical. and i absolutely positively could not disagree with you more :-) with regard to your statement that men are physical and women are mental. i am a very very physical person, always have been, i don't think that's based on gender, it's an individual thing.

but yes, as you say, communication is the really crucial thing. i am not shy about talking about sex with my partner, i'm a very open person in that way and most ways, but there ARE a lot of people, men and women both, who don't feel comfortable doing that, and/or who don't really want to put any effort into working on the sex together, as a team if you will. that is important if the sex is going to be really good. and at the same time that requires a level of intimacy people cannot always reach together -- there are men with whom i simply cannot open up, for different reasons. (the last guy i was with for example? we were just "built" completely differently in terms of our sexual personalities, and i knew really quickly that i'd never be able to make it work with him, let alone open up to him.)

you're right, you don't know how to please us until you get to know us; but the same goes for us, a woman doesn't know at first how to please a man until she gets to know him (and that's not only true in bed, it's true overall). but if people don't communicate about sex, or if they are "just not that into it," i don't see how the sex is going to get good. and i have been in relationships where it didn't get good.

 yrsfrlve
Joined: 12/10/2005
Msg: 164
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/20/2006 12:23:07 AM

Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?

one of the best...
 ÐÎLLÏGÃF™
Joined: 12/24/2006
Msg: 165
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/9/2007 8:36:24 PM
hell ya......................................................................................
if there is no sparks in bed.. poof it's over
Especially if they are un-trainable
 justcueit
Joined: 12/22/2006
Msg: 166
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/9/2007 8:48:08 PM
There are people that just AREN'T sexual. Period. No amount of "time" or "communicating" or "mood setting" will help. They just aren't sexual creatures. Fortunately I haven't experienced this first... hand (if you will :laugh: ) but I have heard about it so thought I'd share.
Could I (capital eye) live with someone like that? No way in hell.... but I'm sure there are people in the same boat or with low sex drives who wouldn't care so much... to each their own **shrugs**
 MelissaMelissa
Joined: 4/2/2006
Msg: 167
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/9/2007 8:49:01 PM

Yup, up to a certain point u try, but then like a good boxing manager, you have to know when to throw in the towel. Ideally you hope your significant other and you have natural chemistry...if everytime, just for it to be good is a huge challenge/test....no good.


Well said, totally agree. For me- the first time is almost always the best because it's new and exciting and the tension and anticipation is all built up (yum!). But, I know sometimes it may end up being a fumble, so I'd give a person some time. But, if after some talking and practice it's really not working... thats a dealbreaker for me.
 molly__blooming
Joined: 4/6/2006
Msg: 168
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Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/9/2007 8:54:27 PM
There are people that just AREN'T sexual. Period. No amount of "time" or "communicating" or "mood setting" will help. They just aren't sexual creatures.


i totally agree, just, well said. and yes, i have experienced it also. most unpleasant.

and yes, i say again, bad sex is a good reason to stop dating. :-)
 frankly25
Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 169
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 12:03:02 PM
Yes
If the person is willing to see if they would enjoy that is acceptible, I love the oppotunity to bring my lover out of her shell and experiance new things and positions.
I have been told that many men have not discovered that the whole thing is about pleasuring the Lady you are with, not just their orgasm.
Fore play is ALL the fun.
Comments ???
 MelloDLyn
Joined: 10/25/2004
Msg: 170
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Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 12:09:40 PM
Yes I dated this guy and the sex was awful, I told him we had to get toys to keep me happy. He said ok. Then I got to thinking why settle in a relationship if the sex is really that bad for you in the 1st place there are other men out there that know what they are doing.
 BIGHENRY1
Joined: 4/5/2008
Msg: 171
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 1:04:20 PM
"There's nothing better that a lover that knows your body inside and out (talk about a double entendre!), and since all women are different, there's nothing out of the ordinary in telling him what turns YOU on"


Yes bad sex can be a rational reason if it really can't be improved or if your partner is simply disinterested in it and there appears to be no resolve! In my experience and I echo the above quote, a lover who knows and understands your body inside and out and continually explores what makes each of you more excited every time, enhances the relationship significantly.
 wild heart
Joined: 10/14/2007
Msg: 172
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 1:54:20 PM

I told him we had to get toys to keep me happy.


I hate the idea that because a couple buys toys and uses toys means the sex is bad. Toys are an enhancement and couples having good sex use them all the time.

I also find it a turn off if a man thinks that using toys makes him any less of a man and that he can't satisfy me.

I would use communication before I used toys.

The trust, communication and good sex is usually already there when toys are introduced because the couple are open enough to talk about and have fun with it and understand that it's fun fun fun and in no way an insult to anyone's sexual "prowess".

The best sex is based on communication, trust and openess. A man or a woman could be great in bed, but if they communication is lacking on either side, the sex (to me) will be bad.

And BTW, toys does not only means a BOB....lots of other goodies out there.
 Kingdongilingus
Joined: 5/28/2007
Msg: 173
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 1:59:48 PM
Yes, bad sex makes a good idea to leave. If they aren't up to your level, you have the choice of (as stated above) Training, or going to another playground.

Wild is right, if you can talk about sex, it usually means you can end up figuring out good, if not great sex between the two of you. If you don't ask, you never know.

You get what you pay for, so if you don't try, you don't get paid, and you don't get.
 namrael
Joined: 4/9/2008
Msg: 174
Is bad sex a reason to stop dating?
Posted: 4/19/2008 4:22:37 PM
It's certainly a reason.

If this is someone you really like, a better way to go about it might be to communicate about the problem. Bad sex with no interest in or effort to improve it would result in my breaking it off with someone.
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