| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/21/2005 2:11:41 AM | I have learned to not look for anything beyond friendship. Then if you become friends and want to take the relationship further the sky's the limit. After all I want the man I do fall in love with to be my best friend.
Remember, that special person you seek is also looking for you............
Angel | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/21/2005 2:11:49 AM | I personally do not want a one night stand. I dont know about the woman, but I AM not that cheap!
I was raised as a gentleman, I know how to treat a lady, and know how to make her feel like a lady.
I would LOVE to have the chance to give one woman the love she deserves. She has to do the same for me too! | |
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foggyb
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Joined: 4/13/2005
Msg: 78 | |
| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/22/2005 8:55:15 PM |
they are sweet at the beginning then lose interest
I'm sayin' it all the time. People don't appreciate what they have until it's gone.
Men seem to lose interest because they aren't mature enough to realize that you need the complete package in a relationship. You MUST focus on all aspects of the relationship, not just sex.
And speaking of focus. Men, take note, when listening to your partner....REALLY LISTEN. That means when she speaks you need to look her in the eyes and really understand what she is saying. It doesn't matter whether she's asking you if you want another glass of water, or asking you for your opinion on something serious. Listen, listen, listen. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/22/2005 10:56:39 PM | How right you are but realize that it is a two way street and women need to focus too.............good men are everywhere. I know of many good men longing for good women and asking themselves "Where are all the good women at?" Sometimes you just gotta look with your eyes closed...........or not look at all and let it come to you.
Jan | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/23/2005 12:08:40 AM | foggyb and fieryice......
you guys are dripping all that sticky, gooey stuff on me, that you two have been flingin' around up there.
its GROSS......stop it.......CUT IT OUT....... | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/24/2005 12:00:14 PM | | Not having searched for "Special Man", I can't speak to that one. But I can say that I have sought "Special Woman", and find her to be quite elusive, as well. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/25/2005 3:00:44 AM | I have enjoyed reading all the replies I have had to my thread..ok maybe i am sad looking for that one special man but I do think there is someone special out there for me...yes i do get lonely but doesnt everyone from time to time...life is what you make it i guess so here's hoping  | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/25/2005 8:25:21 AM | | Ladies your not going to like this but none the less it’s very good medicine. American women are in love with them selves. It’s all about what I look like, What I think and how much I can make my partner beg. Well miss after father time gives you your 26th birthday you are in a snow sled to Hell. You go from walking the walk to frump of the month—sad but true. Once these events’ takes place what you had tall dark and handsome doing for you, now you have to do that for fat, bald and rude. Do not feel sad. It’s just father time evening the score. So when you see someone like me comes calling--- pray to God--- you actually getting a second chance. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/25/2005 9:23:02 AM | Be your self, be happy with your self, have fun in the process and if it’s meant to be excellent if not carry on until you do find Mr Right or not. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/25/2005 10:34:22 AM | I don't think it is so hard to find that special man as it is to recognize him when he enters your life
Greatest post Ive read in while real brunette.  and a blinding flash of the obvious. this is the curse of ALL mankind! | |
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Reids
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Joined: 12/2/2004
Msg: 88 | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 4/27/2005 7:53:36 AM | Awwwwwwww... I hope it's not so much a matter of acting like u don't care... I really love all the wonderful qualities of the fairer sex, and one of those is her sensitivity and the ability to SHOW how she's feeling. I think any woman that 'holds back' on this God-given quality (in the name of guarding her heart) is selling herself short, and isn't taking the risks necessary to find true love.
From what I can tell, the challenge in the dating world is to allow the other person a chance to present their true self, and not act like someone they think you are looking for. Personally, I like to hold off on too many really, really big details. This accomplishes two things: (1) it will keep the more desperate people away, because there isn't enough information on what you are looking for, so they can't try to 'fit' the description just so they can catch your interest. (2) for the people who do have a really great personality, it will give them plenty of room and comfort-level to show it since they won't be concerned about any perceptions of likes or dislikes that their new friend has. Just re-assure them that you are friendly and open-minded... and most people will relax and start to show their true colors.
Dating is challenging. It used to be something I hated with a passion, but still needed to learn to live with... for better or worse (LoL). But now I am learning to really enjoy it. Think of it like looking for a really great 'job'. Yes, you want to be hired, but you also want to find that special employer where "work" seems really enjoyable and worthwile. It's a place you want to go to, and return again and again. Above all, I try not to take anything too seriously at first. My motto: "Hope for the best and expect the worst!" 
Ask open-ended questions. Share openly about who you are, and your likes/dislikes...but keep it brief and to the point. Put the focus back on them...the more you ask, get them to talk, and (in a subtle way) ... 'cross-examine' their earlier comments... you will very quickly find out whether this person is truly genuine, or merely trying to put on an act.
In the end... I'd say it's worth the effort! Nothing truly great in life comes easily... so good luck and happy fishing !!!  | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 10:44:01 AM | I think when and if you meet the right one, it's not going to fizzle out like that, it takes two, both have to be interested and think that the other one is the best thing since sliced bread.
Have you ever met anybody and after a few dates decided he's not the one? I hope so.
When we get older it's very hard to find a match, when we were young, we haven't decided who we were yet, so all we had to do was find somebody we could tolerate. Then you grew up and developed a life, discovered things you like and things you don't, hopefully your partner also enjoyed some of the same things. Now we have a much longer list of things we are looking for in a partner, often that list becomes mutually exclusive. It could be there is no one on the planet the fits the list exactly. So we have to ignore some things on the list, that's the hard part. So we compromise, we date people we know aren't perfect, after a few meetings we evaluate and decide if the compromises are worth the advantages. Often we decide it's not so we move on.
The trick is too look at your list and figure out what are the must haves and what things we can compromise. Try and pare the must haves list down to the minimum, keep the want to haves also but think about them in a different light. I wish more people would put age and long distance onto their wants instead of their must haves. That’s my biggest problem, distance and still wanting kids at my age. Kids are the first thing on my list of must haves, soon followed by no smoking. So get to work on paring that list down and then make sure you have all this info on your profile, might as well tell the world, this is me, and this is who I’m looking for. Maybe they will see it and then you won't be here with this question anymore.  | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 12:01:35 PM | There is no special man.
There maybe a special man of the moment, however, human beings are not monogamous by nature. This is so obviously exhibited in the ever increasing divorce rate.
Marriage is a tool that was designed to increase a family's wealth not because people were in love. That myth of two people falling deeply and passionately in love and conquering all has been promulgated by Hollywood and now women expect that for the most part.
I am married but I am very leary about expecting it to survive until I die. We married relatively young and there are many ways in which people change. Those changes may not be compatible with the relationship and then you make a choice. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 1:04:50 PM | Most women who want a charming prince forget something: The prince had the outside of a frog. It was needed a princess willing to kiss the frog, to turn him into a prince.
Most women today won't bother in kissing the frog, so they won't find the prince within. | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 2:07:48 PM | @frog Rivet Rivet, I agree 100% find one that would love you even if you looked like a frog. Rivet Rivet An old frog at that, but still jumping.   | |
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| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 6:19:35 PM | Hey Im right here.
So respectful of womens and peoples feelings in general IM very careful what I do.
Im not saying I dont like or enjoy sex. Of course I do however if that is all we get then both of us are shortchanged. Im not a wuss. Just have my priorities straight from the get go.
To hurt someone is never a good thing. In the end we all loose that way.
Now my question would be to you.
Why is it sooo hard to get a chance with women ?
Firstoff all anyone would know about any of us is a profile.
A profile is a generalization of who we are. I know Im much more than what my profile says. Basically a good human being. So why do so many take one look at a picture or some words put together and never even do the polite thing and respond when someone sends them an email. Some do but most dont. I always do no matter whether I have interest in that person or not. I never turn down the chance to make a new friend. | |
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cazar
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Joined: 4/28/2005
Msg: 98 | |
| why is it so hard to find that special man
Posted: 5/3/2005 9:45:56 PM | hard to find the special man
in my travels throughout the UsA and overseas I have found one common thread
security ....
the next common factors I found were
financial status
looks
where you live
what you do
now before we get all up and down n bothered..i have been to 32 countries
4 continents and a lot of places ...
I am highly educated and somewhat average looking ....and have been married and divorced as well as raised childrens ...
If you quit looking as I have , one will fall into your lap...
( at least that is what dad told me years ago )
his advice hasnt been wrong yet ...
respects | |
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