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 Capitano_Blaugh
Joined: 3/18/2008
Msg: 676
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?Page 28 of 33    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33)

I urged her to take the pre-nupt. back to that lawyer. To make a long story short, it was thrown out. It was not according to the laws of the Supreme Court of Canada.


I've said it many times before, and I'll say it again:

It's all about the LOOOOoooooooooove at the beginning, and it's all about the MONEY at the end...


 OpieDopey
Joined: 6/16/2006
Msg: 677
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 9:06:35 AM
sure I would, I want to have it all about the money in the beginning, get that all out of the way, then it can be all about the Love till the cows come home....
 boinkboinkboink
Joined: 3/20/2009
Msg: 678
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 9:17:17 AM
If you object to a prenup, you are likely close to broke. If you want a prenup, you're realistic, and likely have assets you want to protect. Truly, why is a new spouse entitled to any part of what you owned before the marriage began? Share equally what you create together during the marriage everything else belongs to the respective individual.
 definitelybratty
Joined: 7/28/2009
Msg: 679
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 12:55:11 PM
In a heartbeat.
 sweetness-one
Joined: 10/17/2005
Msg: 680
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 1:05:49 PM
Not only would I sign, I'd fekking INSIST on him doing the same to the one I'd drawn up.
 varinia
Joined: 1/1/2009
Msg: 681
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 2:22:02 PM
I would insist on one.

That way the thought that either one of us is after money is out the window, from the beginning on.
 kpooks
Joined: 12/23/2008
Msg: 682
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 2:27:21 PM
Would I sign one? If the terms are we walk away with what we came in with, sure. Anyone (male or female) who is financially secure should consider this. She's worked very hard for her dough, and I'd want her to know I want her and love her for her body, mind and soul, not her dough. I'll make my own, thanks, as soon as this fvcking economy rebounds.
 1kindMan4U
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 683
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 2:31:46 PM
Here's the head-in-the-clouds thinking all over again:

"why get married? if somebody wants to sign a pre-nup...it is their way of saying there is a big chance of divorce...this is the problem of here...relationships are not taken seriously...they need to be serious about it..work at it...hopefully familly times will become more important."

You're right on one point. Why get married. There is no COMPELLING reason for a man to get married anymore. With the divorce laws unbalanced and tilted towards providing a financial annuity towards women, why get married?

There's no more moral shame for living together

No moral shame for having a child out of wedlock.

No legal limits on traveling across state lines with a woman you arent married to.

No law against unmarried sex

When people still believe that REAL ADULT LOVE can be FALLEN OUT OF, a prenup is, or should be, a REQUIREMENT to get a marriage license. The only people who would object are the family law attorneys, and women with an active "entitlement/golddigging gene". All others see that a properly done prenup is the insurance policy on the finances, to keep the love pure. LOVE ladies, wont CARE about his money, or earning ability, or assets. ALL assets acquired during a marriage can CONTRACTUALLY be handled by how you hold title.

Marriage, is a partnership contract bonding you as partners to another in title, with NO FINE PRINT about the expectations of the parties. ALL of the expectations are supposed to be covered under ONE word? LOVE? What poppycock crapola.

Did you know that a woman can have unprotected sex with a man-NOT-her-husband, and the STATE will make the HUSBAND support any child spermed by that strange man. Hmmmmmm.. where is the equity in THAT?? Seems to be a little one-sided, dont ya think?

I have to run. Be back tonight.
 tnt144
Joined: 10/22/2007
Msg: 684
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 4:51:09 PM
I've been reading more of the posts and profiles in this thread, and I have to say, this is one of the most revealing threads regarding dating/relationships I have ever seen. This question is the shortest rout to finding the good, the bad, and the ugly.

It's never been more evident to me that people make up excuses to fit their own desires... I love the people that say "I want one to show it's not about money"... that has to be the biggest crock I have ever heard... a prenup, by it's very definition, is about money! You have to be joking me! It's never been so evident to me why the divorce rate is so high.

I looked up the profiles of the women who answered correctly (there were one or two men) and found only as many good catches in those as I did in the last one-hundred random profiles. That's sad.

Look... I'm going to try and say this again as plainly and as simply as I can...

1) Love is the power which predominately holds a relationship together. Would a person in love with their spouse want a divorce?

With me so far?!

2) Trust is a necessary ingredient to romantic love... in fact, love levels go up or down in direct proportion to the level of trust. She can't love you if she can't trust you. Do you smell what I'm cooking?!

3) If you bring up a prenup, you are, at the very least, planting a seed in the other person's mind that you don't trust them highly... you have a high risk of eroding trust and love, which is the beginning of the road to the very thing you don't want, divorce. You guys are shooting yourselves in the foot, sabotaging your relationships from the very start, and you don't even know it, you have no clue! Even if she seems to be in favor of it, she may just be telling you what you want to hear, in the heat of the moment. People rarely tell you that you are breaking their spirit until many transgressions latter, and/or when it's too late. Love is stolen away from people like a thief in the night. You have to take responsibility for your actions and know what you are doing if you want to play the love game and win. Are you still awake, do you smell the..... coffee??! Or, do you smell broken china??!!

It reminds me of a commercial I once saw of a first date... the woman, during a romantic dinner with whine and soft lighting takes a dating contract out of her purse and puts it on the table... how thoughtful of her!?!?! Whats for desert... an icepick?!

The number-one reason for divorce is not a money issue... it's hate... because near the end, they find themselves doing the relationship work without the reward of love, and grow to hate you... that's why those pretty young things turn into scorned women... and there is nothing worse than a scorned women.... they will get you! So don't go there.

If you think you need a pre-nup, don't get married. And for the love of God, don't have kids... we have enough broken homes and screwed up kids already.
 serenity0202
Joined: 9/11/2009
Msg: 685
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 4:52:49 PM
No problem whatsoever with a prenup!
Everyone "presumably" gets married with the thought that it's going to last for the rest of your days. Why should a prenup be an issue then? In the event of a split, why should either party have to part with what was his/hers before you got together. What you acquire together during the relationship I would think should be split, yes. What you have beforehand should remain yours. Why should anyone else have any entitlement to that? If either the man or woman is entering in to the marriage with signifigantly more than the other, why should they not be able to protect themselves. I don't think it has anything to do with your "love" for someone. If I were to marry again, I would insist upon having one drawn up. I would also not have a problem if the man I was to marry wanted one put in place.
 ~Kyn~
Joined: 8/24/2009
Msg: 686
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 4:59:17 PM

Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?

Wouldnt bother me.

If a guy has 10 gazillion dollars before I come into his life... its HIS money... not mine.

Only thing Id be specific on is what we accrue together after the marriage.
Its half and half after that.
 Stafford_Jim
Joined: 8/12/2009
Msg: 687
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 7:42:11 PM


I seriously don't think I'll be getting married. If having to sign a prenup is a requirement, I know I won't be getting married. It's insulting as can be because it says that he believes "money talks" when it comes to me. If that's what he thinks of me, I'm not the girl for him.

Hearts are bound by love, not contracts.


Prenups aren't for hearts bound by love, they are for hearts no-longer-bound by love.

I would expect a woman to sign a prenup if she wasn't bringing much into the marriage, and I would fully expect to sign one if I married a woman who had a lot more to lose than I do in a divorce.

Most folks that don't agree with them fall into one of two categories that I've seen:

1) Niave, they believe that their love will never end no matter what.
2) Would wind up on the winning side of a divorce, meaning they didn't bring anything to the partnership and only stand to gain financially in divorce.
 RLC89
Joined: 5/18/2009
Msg: 688
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:05:27 PM
Would I sign a prenupt? No.

I'm definitely not a gold digger, so IF I ever got married, it's going to have to be just about that: TRUST. The man will have to trust that I'm not going after all of his assets. If he still insists that I HAVE to sign a prenupt before he will marry me, then I'll move on. Not because I want the money, but because this is an indication (in my opinion) that he is not serious about me, or the marriage. Does he really love me? If so, why is he already thinking about a divorce before we have even gotten married? Why doesn't he trust the woman he supposedly loves and wants to spend the rest of his life with?

I don't particularly want to get married. Ever. I'll only do it if I were with a guy I loved enough and thought he was really "The One" for me. I don't need/want marriage bad enough to sign a prenupt.
 katty31
Joined: 8/25/2009
Msg: 689
yes to prenup
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:14:23 PM
Yes i would. i am in the relationship for love, not money. if the man i am abovt to marry is wealthy, thats his money. he earned it before he met me. i haue no right to it.
 verityone
Joined: 10/23/2008
Msg: 690
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:19:21 PM

I'm definitely not a gold digger, so IF I ever got married, it's going to have to be just about that: TRUST.

I don't trust anyone who has a problem signing a contract that protects both of us in the event that the climate between us changes...
 ItsMargo
Joined: 4/24/2007
Msg: 691
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:25:14 PM

Prenups aren't for hearts bound by love, they are for hearts no-longer-bound by love.

Very true.

The government determines how your financial relationship will be divided. Yes, that is how they view your marriage on divorce. A prenup is also for people who want to divide things they way they want to - not how the government determines it.

As someone stated earlier, it's very important that both are in agreement with it and that it would be considered fair by the courts so it will stand up.

The trust argument doesn't work for me. Going into the relationship - when you are full of love for each other and can't imagine anything would ever pull you apart - is the very best time to be determining what would be fair for both if you were to split up further down the road.
 RAMPERBILL
Joined: 6/24/2009
Msg: 692
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:27:50 PM
If both parties gave everything away so they could start fresh, like they were kids again, then you would both have a journey worth travelling together. A prenup does this by leveling the playing field as if you both were new. Both equals. It also allows the one with more to lose to get away from an abusive spouse without paying half of their life's earnings to get away. Anyone who would deny me that can take a hike.
 1kindMan4U
Joined: 5/23/2007
Msg: 693
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/14/2009 8:38:00 PM
Trust.. what a bunch of crap. Marriage is still a LEGALLY BINDING PARTNERSHIP CONTRACT people.

Remember that under-the-breath phrase ALL shamans say? By the power vested in me by gawd. (and under their breath - the STATE we are in right now) You are now CONTRACTUALLY BOUND.

Ever notice how women with MONEY.. always want a prenup. Virtually always.

Ever notice that the posters on here arguing AGAINST a prenup, are mostly WOMEN.

Women.. if you want EQUALITY, then push your state legislatures to put "prenup style wording" into the LAW when divorce happens. EQUALITY. You've fought for it for over FORTY YEARS. So stand up and MAKE SURE IT HAPPENS.

Do that and this whole argument goes away. I mean.. REALLY.

Now to TSTw-whatever.. What world do YOU live in?

Men shouldnt trust the COURTS to be fair. THAT's the reason so many want a prenup.

Women seeking a divorce are NOT seeking FAIR when they want to:"Take him for ALL he's got".. which means they need COMPENSATION (money- not love) for her hurt FEELINGS. Where is the LOVE in that? NOWHERE.. ya feel it yet?

The number one reason for divorce is IMMATURITY. It's IMMATURE to think that LOVE will conquer all.
It's IMMATURE to think that LOVE will overcome a difference in views as to how many kids to have.. or TO have kids.. or HOW many pairs of shoes she needs, or WHAT car to buy.. or or or or.
It's immature to expect that you can withhold sex as a manipulative power game.. and NOT think that after a while he'll go get it elsewhere. (yes, gender specific since GENERALLY men dont withhold sex from their partner) Men marry for REGULAR SEX. That is the IMPLIED CONTRACT that becomes a woman's RESPONSIBILITY if she wants her man to come home to her EVERY NIGHT. HE promised to come home, cause YOU promised to give it up.. OFTEN and REGULARLY. Got that truth?
It's immature to think men like to hand their manhood to your coinpurse. Toilet seat? put it down yourself. Or put it back UP for him when YOU are done. sheeesh
It's immature to think you can add 100 lbs and think he wont lose interest.
It's immature to whine and **** like a LITTLE GIRL, and expect him to put up with it. He married a PARTNER.. not adopted a little girl.
Shall I go on? I think not.. I've provided enough feed to the angry cows out there already. Jack Nicholson comes to mind in A few good men. You CANT handle it.

Erase the financial bias in divorce court.. and prenups will go away. marriage is NOT an annuity. ONLY GOLDDIGGERS refuse a prenup.

Finally.. the number one reason for divorce is NOT hate. It's UNREALISTIC EXPECTATIONS.. and the LACK of a "Prenuptial discussion"

A prenuptial discussion involves a LIFEPLAN. Kids, religion, inlaws, outlaws, lifestyle, savings, spending, future, sex, free time.. and a whole lot more.

Hell, most couples dont even agree on how many kids and WHEN to have em in advance. It isnt about LOVE.. not by a longshot.
 BigDaddyJinx
Joined: 11/4/2006
Msg: 694
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 12:24:52 AM
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?

In a heartbeat. In fact, if there ain't one in consideration then a marriage is not gonna happen.

No prenup...no marriage...no "shacking up" either (common law).

I LOVE how so many people (see: women) are all up in arms and throwing out the word "trust". "If he insists on one then I'll move on...has to trust that I'm not out for his stuff...blah blah blah".

Uh huh...and men put their trust in the Courts to be fair and impartial at divorce proceedings...look how well THAT turned out.

Bottom line is...you're a damn fool idiot if you get married without one. In the days before "no fault" divorces, prenups weren't really an issue of contention except for the super rich and very affluent. In the wake of "no fault" divorces, and the stats that prove that 75% of divorces are initiated by women, and the facts that men get ass raped financially in divorce proceedings...only a complete tool would get married without one and rely on "trust" to keep them safe and warm at night...

Trust won't keep the house YOU paid for. Trust won't keep the money YOU made. Trust will see you picking up HALF of HER accumulated debts and paying through your ass for the rest of your life for everything else. Trust will see you damn near suicidal if not pushed right over.

Yep...trust is for suckers.

I prefer to live in the real world where I'm only too aware that the Courts are against men, and trust is just another illusion perpetuated by women to get a man to fall for her crap so she can soak him later.

Or vice versa...after all there's gotta be at least one woman out there with more money than a man and way more to lose.

Oh yea...Kevin Federline springs to mind...K Fed takes Britney to the cleaners. Not bad for a former dancer/wannabe rapper with no talent.

But hey...she trusted him.

So did Paul McCartney...

Good luck with that trust thing.
 Mahogany-Rush
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 695
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 5:22:12 AM
This is and always will be a controversial subject. should people sign one, well the way people are getting married at a drop of a hat, I say yes, but people who actually marry because of love, compatibility, singing the same song from the same book, have set healthy boundaries etc etc etc, ( which is rare I might add) doesn't need one.

Question, why do most people get married? answer because they claim they are in love at that moment, not realizing as time goes on people change, and some folks cannot for what ever reason embrace change.

Some im sure marry for money, lets face it if you're a geek, or a over weight homely person, with a personality of a dead fish and you have money and you're looking for eye candy, you better get a pre nup, if you think she's marrying you because of you , then I say you need a psych report because your delusional.
 Merrylass
Joined: 12/30/2007
Msg: 696
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 6:25:58 AM

but people who actually marry because of love, compatibility, singing the same song from the same book, have set healthy boundaries etc etc etc, ( which is rare I might add) doesn't need one.


Contradicts


Question, why do most people get married? answer because they claim they are in love at that moment, not realizing as time goes on people change, and some folks cannot for what ever reason embrace change.


Paragraph 1 is bad advice because paragraph 2 is correct. No matter how much you think you might be doing the right thing, or are 'in love' or whatever, things can change so it is always a good idea to get a prenup.
 tamzin01
Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 697
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:44:54 AM
Yes I would. My uncle got married and never got divorced. He hadn't seen his ex wife in years, but when he died she sprung up out of the blue and claimed everything he had. If you have nothing and have nothing to lose, then there's no point, but otherwise I think pre-nups are a good idea, and apparently abroad it is a lot more commonplace.
 tamzin01
Joined: 5/29/2008
Msg: 698
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Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:46:05 AM
I think you have to be savvy in relationships - I think it's a good idea to avoid ending up a lot worse off if anything goes wrong.
 Mahogany-Rush
Joined: 7/23/2009
Msg: 699
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 8:52:55 AM
merrylass, did you miss the " which is rare " part?
 granz
Joined: 6/22/2009
Msg: 700
Would you sign a prenuptial agreement?
Posted: 9/15/2009 9:32:57 AM
Considering same-sex marriage is a difficult subject at the moment, I don't think that's going to be a concern for me any time soon. If it were legalized on a national scale, I still don't think I would bother getting married. I don't want the state to be any more involved in my personal life than it has to be, and the idea that all my possessions would become marital property is just... messy. If this relationship doesn't work for whatever reason, I'm not going to suffer through some legal misery over it. I just want to take my things and move on.

I don't think the idea of a prenuptial agreement would really offend me. I understand why people would want to side-step the whole legal battle and just get on with their lives after all is said and done. Some people feel it's a gesture of mistrust, but I think it comes down to wanting to avoid getting caught-up in any bullshit. Obviously, people can be pretty bitter and vindictive about a failed relationship.
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