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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 12:13:57 AM | Verissa...
Love is not magic...
"if you're the only one making the effort it can't be love."
How is that so? It's love... just not a loving relationship.
Most of us want to be able to find someone that we love with all our soul to feel the same exact way about us. Incredible odds!
Sadly, most people find mates that arent really in the same "boat" they are in...
Also sadly, even if they DO find someone reasonably compatible, either THEY or their mates change over time...
I guess .. the reason I am writing at all.. is I looked thru all your posts.. and saw your bubbly enthusiasm turn sour with pain from rejection to acceptance to whats now getting to be cynicism...
I really liked your later post prior to this last one... Basically saying that just because one person hurt you, you will not let your heart turn jaded. I was saying GOOD! Only way you are going to be able to really connect to someone is to have a heart at least receptive to the idea of REAL love....
Now.. I cannot say I found real love... nope... "WELL THEN WHAT ARE YOU DOING POSTING THIS TO ME THEN BOY!!???"
Hey.. now.. hold on...
I know what real love is.. by observation... my dad and his wife of over 25 years...
They are like glue and even though they have their disagreements... I have NEVER seen a relationship where BOTH still look deep into each other's eyes and see how much they really love each other.
Marriage is not for everyone. True love is rare.... because it takes TWO to feel the roughly the SAME intense love and TWO that have the ability to ADAPT to each other's changes and LOVE those changes to make it work...
Ok this is long winded enough...
Your thread was quite interesting... thanks for starting it | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 10:15:11 AM | ^^^^Well Mr. OPT I will try to be a little more positive. It's kind of hard to be when so many people are just out to play games...
I still believe that people are basically good and that love exists...I've seen it when I watch the little old people holding hands walking down the road holding hands. I also work for a company where EVERYONE is married and happily so. It’s kind of nice to see that these days, and makes me want that for myself as well. None of the marriages are perfect, there are no misconceptions that marriage is all sunshine and roses; I never expected that. It’s a heck of a lot of work, communication and commitment.
I'm not skeptical or jaded and angry I'm just confused and disheartened by the amount of games being played. I see the acceptance from people on here laughing at the "Newbie" who has found "love", "Oh they'll be back in a few weeks crying about how their hearts have been broken" giggle giggle, says the long term member...and the sad thing is they're right...most of the time they are back. Maybe I'm completely naive, maybe it’s a terminal case of stupidity...I haven't figured it out yet...but who I am on here is who I am in real life, what I say and what I feel are real. No bullshit, no lies, no lines, no falsehoods whatsoever. Perhaps I should take more psychology courses and learn more about human nature...but I afraid if I could understand how people could become so hurtful, I may be able to become that way myself.
Love can happen I know that..and my comment about “if you’re the only one making the effort, it can’t be love” I was referring to the other person confessing their love…I should have been more clear about that. When you love someone and they “say” that they love you in return but they’re actions do not, how can it really be love on their part? The saying that actions speak louder than words is one of the more true saying I have ever heard. You can say something till you blue in the face but if you make no effort then “I love you” is merely 3 words, is obviously not important enough to show, and all too easily said by some.
Long winded reply...lmao | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 10:31:41 AM | It might be possible - ONLY in chatting - camming and ur your mind is weak towards him, that makes you beleive & think you are in love....
but perhaps when you get to meet in real - you might realise it was all infatuation and fantasy.... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 11:44:58 AM | | Verissa, I think that you may have a self esteem issue, like a teenager has when anyone pays attention to them, It's time to grow up and realize that true love is not a long distant, chatting or camming relationship. You may think that you love him but you have no idea what he is like in real or if he's in a relationship already or has aids. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 12:30:54 PM | hey Verissa,
not very long ago, i have fallen for someone i ve never met b4.. i thought i loved him so much and we were even talking about having a daughter together.. things was great at that time, as u see i said "was".. i no longer see him as the person i love anymore, and i still love him somehow. like a friend, someone i told my whole life to, and yet knew his life as well. yet, we never lay hands on each other, he never hold me sleep.. never kissed.. never hugged. it didnt work out between us, and he went back to his EX GF whom he met already, even she lives further away to him then me..
love is very beautiful.. the expression in each other's eye.. the gental touch on ur hand.. the blowing air on ur cheeks...even the sweaty excises on the bed... the cuddle to sleep.. all of these, its not a keyboard, a monitor and a webcam can give. i m really really sorry to say that. but its true and happened to me. till today, i love Bill, just for the feelings i have for him, but i choose to move on to something touchable and more real.. i want someone i can have a beer with.. someone to hold hands and talk a walk near the lake... even someone to BBQ in teh park with my kids...
i wish you the best of luck with the person u never met, and wish u guys will finally meet and try work it out.. but yet.. dont fall too deep till u actully meet the person.. b/c u never know....
<3 V, again, GOOD LUCK
KARLIA | |
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HBunny
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Joined: 7/3/2006
Msg: 631 | |
| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 1:45:43 PM | Sorry but its not possible.
Its all a fantasy until you are face to face with each other. You can have loving FEELINGS towards someone you've never met but its not real love.
real love takes time........it takes being physically together for a long period of time.
its possible that if u met this person you could fall in love but until you are face to face its just an illusion and a fantasy. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 1:57:36 PM | Ab-so-freakin-LUTELY!!...within 10%...{Hell..I've been 'In Love' a Dozen times This Year..!!..and never met ANY of them!!..Luckily, my Fantasies keep me Optimistic about Reality!!!}
The only problems being..
1) AGE...wether or not it Matters...
2) Distance..Difficult to overcome if Both are firmly rooted in their location...
3) Chemistry/Compatability...Attitudes and Mutual Attraction..{Many 'Attractive' people tend to be Selfish, Egotistical, Vain and just plain Snooty..!!!}..[BOY!!..am I gonna get 'Ripped' for THAT one!!]
Many just want to play Games...'Just Date'...'No Strings'...No Commitments...or they just don't get along with others...
C'est la vie...!!!
The search goes ON...!!!
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 5:51:24 PM | ninjasword
are u an oracle? stop it. ofcourse love happens thru the net, why do datingsites grow so big and so many people find each other thru the net?
and u cant really open ur mouth until u been in the same situation. Its like ur opening ur mouth to someone having aids when u ( i guess) dont have aids. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 6:04:11 PM | ^^ you said it girl...boy I find it amusing, and I do it myself from time to time, how pwople read a thread begining but do not look through to see is the op said something else... Ninja hun he didn't have aids..and hopefully he finds what he needs sadly it just wasn't me. I've moved on and have some awsome friends..some in fact because of this very thread.. everyone has their point of view mine still stands as a yes plain and simple. I'd rather love someone for the person inside than lust..mind you if there turns out to be no spark...then you're all correct when you say it's not love..it's infatuation...but if there are..it can grow into a great love from a small love/idea/infatuation.  | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:13:35 PM | Verissa
As for human nature... there is some kind of gene that most people have that seems to revel in other people's misfortune. All you have to do is look at ONE show of Jerry Springer... and look at the audience... its scary to see so many of them smiling and laughing when others on stage are hurting big time.. or getting beat up...
It is possibly because we have to kill to survive...
Hope you dont become that way yourself... that means there is a man out there that will not be able to enjoy a rare woman that can be free of that cold trait a lot of us have.
Yes... you have to look at the actions... I fall for that too... hear the words and dont REALLY listen to the actions...
You got that one nailed.
That guy never loved you... the actions he showed you when it was time to meet .. says that... unfortunately.. this online stuff REALLY can rev up the "juices" before a meeting, and that can mess up the clear vision you need to assess the person.
Remember Verissa,
the power of love.. resides in the one that gives the love.. not the one receiving it...
this bodes well for you in the future.
opt | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 8:53:12 PM | I am absolutely positively sure that one can fall in love with someone they have never met. It shows real love because you fall in love with theinside and the light that is within them, is true beauty. Dating is so much about sex and stuff but if you take that out of the equasion(sorry spelling) then you can feel and care for the person. I fell in love with a guy over the internet and it was beautiful but things got in the way my young age and his baggage multiple marriages I think it didnot work not because he was in the united states its because we were coming from such different places. I would have been a step mother to a five yr old when I was only 23 he was in his late thirties. I didnot feel it was to much but in the end he had other emotional issues not having to do with me but way beyond a regular persons coping skills. Thus I went studied psychology and understood it more. It was never about me it was about him. I thought I can save and help him. I couldnot. I was very challenged and no human being could have relieved his addiction. He was a closet drug addict. This is to say you can find love I still am looking for it I am now 35 living in montreal and looking to finally settle down I just need to find a good man who I can share my life and is life with. In conclusion would I date a man I meet on the internet yes I would.(Please excuse my fast typing and poor spelling)
Olivia Bella | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 10:08:09 PM | LOve is abstract....there is a different definition with everyone you meet as to what love is.
To fall in love with someone in this medium is an experience, a feeling. IF you deny your feelings when your put in front of this medium, I have to wonder if your human. There are no set guidelines for falling in love.
Denying how you feel about someone you might have come to know and loved is living in the past or the future. The least one can do is be honest with self. Stop justifying and excusing it because of the medium used | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/20/2006 11:00:09 PM | yes it is posibel as long as thier is truth in whats bieng said i fell with a guy on line
Oh..your profile says that you're looking for women? If you're looking for men hun you might want to change that right quick. No wonder you haven't connected, you're confusing the girls and the men don't know cause they think you want a woman. Fix that and I'm sure you'll find the man of your dreams...just be yourself and all will be well. Be very careful though, a lot of men are untruthful and may just want to get into your pants. Way to come out!!! If you were closer I'll bet I could find you a nice boyfriend..we have lots of very handsome gay men here... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/21/2006 5:10:44 AM | | Its possible to fall in lust with someone you have never met,believe me i know!but love is a no from me,how can you know you love someone until youve looked into each others eyes and held/touched each other?i mean what if you meet the one you "love" and hate their mannerisms or their breath smells?that all seems pretty trivial i know but its the little things you love about someone..and yes,including their personal hygiene!The fantasy of falling love without actually have met the person is great but alas thats all it is,a fantasy. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/21/2006 6:45:33 PM | | Of course its possible to fall in love with someone you have never met in rl. But the chances of it blooming into a happy successful mutually satisfying relationship is a direct co-efficient factor to your resistance against believing in such an idea which results in an Internet displacement theory which basically states while that a theoretical sphere as large as the Internet holds enough water for a conjecture of ideas and figuratively much latitude, it disallows for unmet principles to be tested in an atmosphere that basically has no control group. We're all a part of this huge grande social experiment and re-engineeering project and if you state it is possible to fall in love with someone you have never met, you will find very few people able to disprove you because basically no one shares the experience. Except for your self with others whom you have also never met; so in essence, one pretty well has to either abandon the idea of "discovering love" altogether, or , abandon the idea of discovering love on-line altogether. In a world of extreme end zones, in this one, there are very few in betweens. Good luck if you ever get hitched up and live together happily ever after on a LAN. Hahahaha. But we all need to remember: in RL, there is no PREVIEW button. Just a thought. Im my opinion, love can be kindled online yes indeeed and can also be cultivated, whether or not it meets the real watering found only in rl and the sunshine of rl is another thing. So while I may believe its possible to happen, I have chosen to believe its not personally possible. This too is all a part of the strange strange dichtotomy that is : the Net. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/21/2006 11:24:14 PM | Holy Crap!!!!!! Are some of you guys crazy, are you so lonely that you actually think that falling in love with someone on the internet is normal, what a crock of sh*t, man some people her are so not together. For example, last year this girl told me she fell in love with this Arabs guy and he lived in another country, every time I told her to watch out she got pissed off at me and hanged up on me, she did not talk to me for weeks, then finally she got back to me and apologized and I don’t know why I apologized also. I guess I was being myself a good person, but then she would start again and again about this wonderful guy that lives on the middle east somewhere and she’s madly in love with him, In my head I’m thinking, I can’t believe I’m listening to all this crap, how stupid can a human be, where are the brains of this person, so I kept telling her to watch out that it could be a scam, and again she hung up on me telling me to go F myself. So again after a few months go by she tells me lets meet for coffee, so we met for coffee I’m telling her I broke up with this girl I was dating and got her a going away present, so she tells me I’m crazy buying a present for a girl that I’m not dating, then I told her I did it because it pleased me to do it? Oh wow, listen to this now? She tells me? you know I did that also, I sent 600.00 dollar’s to this guy that I fell in love with on the internet. Okay now did you all get that? I told her? Hey! wake up girl!, I got a present for a girl that I dated and she was a real person, I got to touch her, kiss her, love her, she was real, not like your guy that is a fantasy on the internet and conned you $600.00 dollars to send him. She said she did it because it pleased her. Now you guys are people with brains I guess, what do you guys think about this girl, just think it, can you describe in one word what this girl is, I bet the person with the lowest IQ here would be able to describe this girl in one word. So now we come back to this question, I say it is possible to fall in love with someone you never met only if you are so desperate and insecure of yourself that you degrade yourself and create a fantasy to a reality to convince your mind to believe that it’s happening. I think the shrinks would have a feast day with her.      | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/23/2006 7:16:15 AM | I say it is possible to fall in love with someone you never met only if you are so desperate and insecure of yourself that you degrade yourself and create a fantasy to a reality to convince your mind to believe that it’s happening. I think the shrinks would have a feast day with her.
^^ Why are you here then? What happens if you meet someone far away. It happens. People fall in love all of the time. Now I'm not speaking of the fly by night people who get feelings for whoever happens to be nice to them...I'm talking you meet someone and you're so connected and everything feels like dejavous..and even if the moment is fleeting, ie my short romance here that began this thread, it can't be anything less than love. And given the fact that I still think the world of the crazy sob..lmao..I have to say for myself "I do love him" its a deep affection that grew from closeness of spirit and mind..I wish him the best, would never wish him any harm. It doesn't have to be recipricated to be love.
Love is a gift to be given without expectations of something in return.
As for some idiot sending money to someone they haven't met? Especially someone in the middle east and doing it from Canada, WTF? Now that is just plain wrong, does she not watch the news? Can she not find someone from a country not in an area of conflict? Not to be mean or judgmental here but we've had enough problems with terrorists in our country, he may not be but you never know. The woman should be slapped.
I have sent little gifts to friends all over the world, whom I have never met, but never money. | |
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Xtype
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Joined: 7/6/2006
Msg: 646 | |
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lyra
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Joined: 5/15/2006
Msg: 647 | |
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wurl
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Joined: 7/2/2006
Msg: 648 | |
| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/25/2006 8:41:54 PM | | of course, but so what. Love is just a psychological mechanism that can be triggered with the correct mating dance. There are plenty of players (not fish) whom know exactly how to do so via the written word. But there is no substance or value. Proceed with caution. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/28/2006 12:30:08 AM | | i don't think that is possible without meeting. you can open yourself up to the idea and want it badly with this person that you have come to care about. but from expeirence if the physical stuff isn't there then all the personality in the world won't count being nice and talking sweet is no substitute for physical intimacy | |
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Tayven
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Joined: 11/11/2004
Msg: 650 | |
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