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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/16/2006 12:24:21 PM | I can be just as nieve as u Verissa, in fact I think if ppl were more honest, anyone can be really, just some ppl would rather seem superior then and 2 others....?
Were all only human and all make mistakes...? but it takes a bigger person 2 admit them!
I fell 4 someone online years back on Personals and never seen a pic!
As time went on I got 2 know him also from the inside and he didn't live 2 far away
which made it easier 2 finally meet!
We met in public Place 4 dinner and personally I thought he was GEEKY at first
but he was a very EDUCATED man!
Big ole glasses,Slicked back side parted Hair u get the pic...?
I wasnt even planning on going out w/ him again,
and yes I hate 2 admit I was being superficial...! lol
Well as it turned out he let me change his hair style to a spikey look and downsized
his glasses...!
Actually we went 2 EyeLand and he bought a matching tinted pair 4 both of us! 
He was wearing Blue Jeans now and was soooooooo Handsome actually...! hehe
But unfournatley he wasn't honest about one thing!
And that was he had a bad liver and died w/ then 3 yrs of our relationship...!
So I moved back home and wasn't divorced yet...! long story, and started a divorce when
My hubby was dying also of liver problems, he asked me 2 be his caregiver and stop the divorce... as he never took me off of anything!
So again I watched someone I cared about he was my kids father dying of same thing
which is why I will never ever get envolved w/ someone again who drinks HEAVY...!
It truly is the most horrible death 2 see someone go thru....!
So the point here I feel is YES and NO.. U can fall enlove w/ someone u haven't met!
I truly believe 4 the most part it is the FANTASY of what we perceive 2 be luv until u actually do meet in person....then see if both still feel the same...?
I think u and I Versissa were just lucky this one time....?
but I wouldnt count on it happening 2 often.....! I do wish u the best of luck w/ this guy
and pray he's everything and more that u were searching 4...! | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/16/2006 12:33:13 PM | NO. You cannot love what you do not know. And if you haven't even met, you hardly know anything at all. It is just infatuation, a longing for love. True love is based on the whole person after spending a lot of time together.
That's why love dies for many over time. it is only then that they begin to know who the person really is, and discover they are not in love with that.
:) Cali | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/18/2006 2:34:02 PM | | No, you are falling in love with an illusion that you have made up. You may know a lot about this person, his likes and dislikes, the sound of his voice, his stories, his jokes, etc., but until you have actually spent time together, you cannot truly know each well enough to fall in love. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/18/2006 7:38:30 PM | | no u r livin n a fantasy world picturin your idea men in jus one sided u need the whole package for example a men n jail is feedin into your emotions playin into your mind tellin you things u want to hear but when reality hits and he comes home he is this other person stop livin in fantasy world and get a clue its the same with an abuser u wish that he can be the person u first met but in reality he is brainwashin u to pretend hes somebody hes not. jus to get u emotionally. its only fair to meet the person to see if u like him r not. physically as well as mentally. A man will play with your mind first to see wat is your weekness to the looks of it he jus found yours be carefull n lettin your guard down for the sweet talk | |
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Kait06
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Joined: 8/22/2006
Msg: 832 | |
| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 12:22:18 AM | | Sure it is! Or is it? You get a wonderful chance to get to know someone inside and out through all the conversation that comes from meeting someone and becoming interested in them in a way that is totally unphysical. Everything they say, everything they do.. they can be seemingly perfect..... but only if they are the exact image of what they have been portraying to you. Possible..? Yes... Likely..? No. I keep my hands in my lap and mess with my cuticles and laugh too loud when I meet new people. That's not something someone I met online would know or something I would ever have a reason to say. It's all these little things about someone that add up to the big 'L' word. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 4:00:46 AM | No. However It is possible to fall in love with the constructed ideal you've formulated in your head *about someone* who you haven't met and the possibility of seeing that construct manifest in reality thru the other person.
Rarely however does our construct overlay onto the person we're infatuated with [often think we're in love with] -- people aren't the sum of our perceived notions, they have shortcomings, and such which the construct never takes into account. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 6:42:40 AM | ITA w/ that a 100% anymore...(lh90716) I seem 2 attract guys who Play mind games more then Honest guys! Example... Thier is this guy who found me on Personals said he was a Science Teacher from Philly we exchanged fone Numbers as he didn't have IM...! 1st his name was George then after a week he told he wanted me to know his real name not his stage name as he put it...but i call it a nic name! Anyway he said he was falling 4 me and that his name is Paul! He seemed to be all I was looking 4 as far as... He was always respectful, we had alot of same interest, sense of humor, wanted to treat me as a QUEEN, even said he was going 2 marry me, which I'AM NOT READY 4 THAT ONE JUST YET....! LOL Owns his own home...! ect!
But yet this has been going on sense June 10th....? Owns a 2005 Kia but doesn't want 2 put miles on it 2 come meet me as he promised 3 different times...! said he prefers a Bus! Which would take 6 hrs instead of 3 hrs at most if he drove here? He sent me a card in the mail telling me how much he wanted to meet me and couldn't wait, said I was a foxy looking Lady!
Uses only a mobile fone which u can't trace...? said he would tell me everything I want 2 know when we meet in person, calls me now yesterday wanting me 2 come 2 Philly, which by the way I told him I won't drive that far not being familar w/ area or knowing enough about him...! He then wanted me 2 take a bus their saying it's only like $70 round trip...! So I told him I can't afford it....! he never offered to pay my way......? And that it still didn't change the fact I don't know enough about him, and if he couldn't come here on my turf then let's just 4 get this SHERADE...! I told him he could be MARRIED, which he said he never was...? or just a PLAYER , or an online PREDATOR....? I told him I'am 2 old 4 these games an hung up...! GUY'S WHAT'S WRONG W/ THIS PIC ? not that I haven't figured it out! lol | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 8:51:56 AM | | WHATS WRONG WITH THIS PIC....It had red flags from the start...not to sound mean but Sweeter you make it easy for that type of person to prey on you..first...to get on a dating site you need to register...in turn you need a e-mail...RED FLAG 1....Real name -vs- stage name..lol RED FLAG 2....Many sensless reasons of not comming to you RED FLAG 3...so if you cant or wont see the flags you might want to read some self help/Dating tip books...3 strikes your out....the internet offers a safe haven for jerks who get off hurting and playing women...and women playing men also...if he was to hurt you or take you for what ever you have there is not too much you could of done about it...good thing you ended it.. before more damage was done and only a broke hart was suffered... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 9:02:29 AM | In my opinion (which has been plentiful and often overstated today. LOL!)
Well before I state my opinion on this, I want to first repeat something I wrote earlier which is related and should be explained first...
I do not believe love is an EVENT, I do not believe that anyone has EVER "fallen into" it or had it "just happen" to them. It is MY belief that love is a PROJECT and is BUILT upon a solid foundation of trust, friendship and common ground. It is also my belief that anyone who claims to to have fallen in love, simply does NOT understand love.
Having said that, you are no doubt guessing that I am about to say, "no" right? Wrong! I DO believe that what you are askign about IS possible, BUT, very VERY difficult and rare. The simple reason is, the anonymity of the internet provides to many opportunities to be a coward. This is both good and bad, depending how it is used by both sides. It can make you bold enough to be honest and share your true self (though this is still often coloured with what we LIKE TO BELIEVE about ourselves, and while it isnt really lying, it is not necessarily totally realistic either.) So to answer your question, I beleive you can, if both side are real enough with each other. (phone conversations can help a BIT with voice inflection) but you will still have to VERIFY this love in person before you can be absolutely CERTAIN.
I truly hope that helps you. And dont' fear those who differ. Only YOU can live YOUR life. So live it YOUR way. If you ask an opinion, by all means, listen to and HEAR it, but remember that it is ONLY an opinion. Opinions have a tendency to be rather cheap to dispense and cheaper to buy wholesale, but when they prove out in practice, that is when the real gems of wisdom truly sparkle. :)
Go git 'em girl! There's only one way to find out! Good luck!
- Scotty | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 9:13:24 AM | | I haven't read all of the posts, but in my opinion it is impossible to "fall in love" with someone you have never met. I do believe we can develop strong feelings for someone based upon their appearnce, but just feeling strongly towards them physically doesn't constitute love, it merely constitutes lust.... Until you actually meet the person and get to know their personality, you cannot say that you are in love with someone because a person is more then just their visible exterior. I hope for your sake that you get a chance to meet this guy (If you haven't all ready), and hopefully he is everything you wanted him to be and more! Good luck | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 9:37:26 AM | Pardon the double posting, but there is something VERY important I forgot, rather irresponsibly and stupidly, to address. My apologies.
Whatever you ultimately decide, is of course your choice. but please please PLEASE play it the safe way. No matter which of you goes to meet the other, PHONE A FRIEND, give the full name of the person you are meeting. set a pre-arranged meeting place and give all information, times, dates, EVERYTHING to your friend. then tell them that you will call them at a specific time to let them know it is going okay (or not). Have them give you about 15 minutes leeway to allow for a late call before callig the police. Reconfirm with your friend during that call, what your plans are (they may have changed if you feel things are going well) btu stay with the program and set up a next call and/or the time you will be home and call them from there. Be sure to tell your date that this idea was suggested to you and that you think it is a good idea just to play it smart. (Let's face it, you could still be in sveral seperate bags by the time police arrive, so let him know that you are being looked after, discourage any criminal behaviour with the absolute certainty that it is known whre you are and who you are with. That first meeting should be in a VERY public place until you confirm that HE IS the person you told your friend it would be.)
Seem paranoid? I could relate some stories that would change your mind, but I prefer to keep things on a positive note. Besides, whats ome call "paranoid" others would call "planning ahead".
But try to loosen up and enjoy yourself. If you are too tense with worry, you will be too distracted to be observant enough to learn what you MUST knwo about him.
Good luck!
- Scotty | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 3:20:39 PM | Well thanx (kingofaman) I don't take it as u being mean as I asked a sorta stupid question, even tho I already knew the answer I still wanted another guys input....? and I do know u have 2 register which he is a paid subscriber to yahoo personals...? And he does have a yahoo email which he only emailed me on that once... It's the IM i said he didn't have....? and also by the way he gave me his fone no 1st... and I only gave him my celly b4 my home fone, and he called me several times a day..! So what was ur point their...? Yahoo is not going 2 tell me anything...?
not to sound mean but Sweeter you make it easy for that type of person to prey on you..first...to get on a dating site you need to register...in turn you need a e-mail...RED FLAG 1....Real name -vs- stage
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 3:38:14 PM | I just wanted 2 add here (kingofman)
That u can sign up as any name u want on Personals as I'am sure probebly on all dating sites 4 that matter! Name doesn't have 2 match the credit card ur using, I know this as FACT...! if that's what u were trying to say 2 me....? Now I'am embarrased 2 realize I attract Players or predators....! Maybe I have had 2 many Losses in a short period of time makes me VULNERABLE....? But most times I'am usually pretty perceptive of PPL....! I don't fall 4 every line....! lol | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 6:54:21 PM | ^^^easy, simmer down there girl..I think you misunderstood what he was saying..re read it calmly and think. He was talking about the guy giving you the wrong name....and anyone looking for someone can be easily fooled when someone gives you the wrong impressions and lies.
I was lucky he is who he said he is. I still don't know where it's heading but we'll see... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/19/2006 10:07:33 PM | Hi Verissa....! Think ur taking me wrong I'am calm actually and I did ask for some input here w/ guys! So I can take the HEAT....! lol I thought he was inplying he wasn't really registered w/ personals.....? but he is a paid subscriber.....? Which does mean he had 2 use a credit card, and Paul, George whatever his name is....? does have a yahoo email!
This is why I'am so skeptical about really beleiving u can fall for someone u never see or meet in person.. they can be anyone, or become what they think u perceive them 2 be!
It's still a FANTASY 4 the most part In my opinion as I'am finding their's more dishonest ppl then seems 2 be HONEST anymore.... from what I'am seeing..! but think some have lucked out on this, and again Verissa i hope he's all ur looking 4 and at least u did meet him...! Good Luck!
P.s Is their any way 2 check someone out online like I heard thru ur ISP? Then others have said ISP changes all the time...?
not to sound mean but Sweeter you make it easy for that type of person to prey on you..first...to get on a dating site you need to register...in turn you need a e-mail...RED FLAG 1....Real name -vs- stage | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/20/2006 10:39:30 AM | | It is not only possible but it has actually happened to me before. I think you have to have a certain mindset to fall in love with someone before actually meeting them or seeing their picture. For instance, if you are the type (like me) who goes on personality only then yes it is possible. However if you are the type that goes for the looks then its possibel to feel attracted to them but not necessarily fall in love with them. There is a guy that I have been talking to for almost ten years and we love each other dearly. I have never met him though because he lives in Illinois and I live in Oklahoma. Sometimes I long to be near him because he is probably the closest I will ever get to a soulmate. He knows literally everything about me so in answer to your question YES it is possible! Just be reasonable and be careful and good luck. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/21/2006 12:10:55 PM | Hi (kindanice) As U stated below....! I had the same thing happen, we chatted, and spoke on fone for along time he never had a pic, and no (PUNT) inteneded anyone but sorry Looks do help somewhat as well as personality!
That's why I state in my profile someone, somewhat attractive....? And someone who takes pride in how they look.....?
Not someone as (kindanice) encountered, And I have also met such a guy...!
Just makes for an Uncompfortable, Awkward situation, and Hurt Feelings...!
Hi Daisie, how are you? LMAO at your description of MY former date I met online!!
He looked great in pix, but so different in person - OMG - his breath reeked, his teeth were nasty, he was nearly bald, his pants were up to his armpits and waitin for the flood - can you say grandpa? He told me he was 33, but he was at least 50 Yeah, a webcam helps, but you just can't know til you meet in person.
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/21/2006 12:24:36 PM |
Well...the other danger is that even though you chat with this person you have no idea what they actually are..and go to some of the threads about liars on here. Not to be a buzzkill..but I've talked to guys who seemed perfect...their pics were nice...until you find out the pic isn't even them...and they look NOTHING like they said they did. When looks shouldn't matter...lies do...so trust me...you need to wait before you profess your love...until you physically meet.
If you meet..and you both click..then let the love happen..but don't put so much pressure on it until you meet..or you are putting him on a level he may not be able to jump up to. Good luck.
Well said and I agree. I am actually in the "Yes it IS possible" camp, and have proved it myself. (And I'd defy ANYONE to try and tell me that *I* wouldn't knwo the difference. LOL) But, the above stated is a HUGE danger, and you CAN ALSO fall in love with a complete FICTION. A NON-EXISTENT person. And when they lie, that is what happens, and yhen you meet them and it is NOT the person you fell for, btu can definitely still be in love with the image of a ghost that never was.
I say, Feel what you feel. Cherish it as long as it lasts. Keep your secrets and don't play your entire hand! Meet first and comfirm the person you love and the person you are chatting to are the SAME person. Then play your trump cards and reel him/her/it/they IN! :)
Whether it goes well or not, forget the disappointment. forget the negatives and remember the person you loved even he/she/it/they are imaginary, because imaginary loves are like imaginary friends. they NEVER let you down. :)
Good luck!
- Scotty | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/30/2006 7:06:23 PM | in one word YES!!!!!....ive been there Honey ..its Heaven and He** at the same time ...and to the woman who thinks that you can only find true love by actually touching someone ...thats Totally untrue .....Ive been speaking to one man online for over a year ...were on diffrent coasts and meeting isnt possible Neither of us is married but its just not possible ...and still ..I love him with all my heart and soul ....Dont give up ....it can and does happen ..to many many more then you may know ..Good luck to the both of you  | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/30/2006 7:25:36 PM | | its very possible because love in fact has nothin to do with ones apperence it has to do with the compatibility of two peoples personalitys,ideas,feelings,ect.love has nothing to with looks the fact of weather or not someone meets up to your standers is just a part of the human nature.so yes there is love at no sight(damn i just went all dr.phil). | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/30/2006 8:48:30 PM | I think more people might fall in love with the idea of this person being out there, and possibly being everything they want or are looking for....
But personally, till I meet someone in person, it's all relative and potentially fantasy.... | |
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