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| | Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?Page 56 of 61 (21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43, 44, 45, 46, 47, 48, 49, 50, 51, 52, 53, 54, 55, 56, 57, 58, 59, 60, 61) | Hi, I am a happy to hear you have met someone whom you are so smitten with. Good luck.
Do I perosanlly thing you can fall in love with a person from only emials and phonecalls? Yes. However,its not typical and there is a very fine line between falling in love with a person and and and an ideal. On paper we can all be whatever or whoever someones wants us to be, and thsi is the person we initially have feelings for.
But the proof in the pudding, You cannot overcomes genetics and biogoly.
My advice, meet in person. If after a few meetings you both still feel the same way, then great, go for it. and dont let the nay-sayers get to you. All relationships are different, as are all people.
Good luck. go for it, and let us know, good or bad, what happens. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 4/21/2009 6:52:43 AM | Oh it can and does happen all the time!!!!!!!! you have to remember that love is an emotion....and you get those feelings for someone when they tell you the things that you want or need to hear......the only problem with that is.....when you have never met.....you dont know if any of the things they are saying are true......
let me tell you what happened to me.....I met some guy on the internet.. years ago ..talked to him everyday seemed like forever.....he told me EVERYTHING I wanted to hear..... we were going to be together.......how much he loved me......he called me all the time......he sent me presents for my birthday n such..... would send me flowers for no reason.......ect ect.....so of course he was the man of my dreams.....loved him to death......felt that deep emotional connection.....but never met him.....finally one day he decides to meet me..........drives 12 hrs to get there....we met....spent a great week together......he went home...( which just about killed me because remember I loved this guy alot).....then I started to find out things he has a daughter and lives with a woman for 20 yrs ...is not in the profession he says he was ..LOLOL......so.......moral of the story is.....
Oh yes it can happen without ever having met......but is it smart......HELL NO!!!!!
I learned my lesson and because of the learning experience i'd never again have long distance with anyone.....if you cant physically be in their life...... ( meaning date)......then its not worth it...... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/5/2009 1:59:03 AM | Man, I think its starting to happen to me. I have joined plenty of fish twice and have quit twice. This is my third time, deciding that all I'm gonna do is just look around. Well, in previous times there were profiles that I've read and was somewhat intrigued but never did I have the courage to muster up the ability to contact them, or favorite them, just look at their profiles again and again. Now, the third time I've joined up, I stumbled upon this one profile, and after having looked at it 3 to 4 times, I needed only a small amount of courage to contact her. I believe it was due to having found not just her picture, but what she stated about herself that just drew me to her. I felt that i just HAD to contact her. I felt that maybe we might have than more than just one or two things in common. The problem is, is that I told her that if she was not interested in me she could just message me or not respond and I would wait for a while and if she didn't respond I would take that as a no and there would be no worries on this end, and that I wished her well. Well, after that, I looked at my sent messages folder and found that she read my message and then deleted it, but at least I saw that she viewed my profile. I took this as somewhat of an ambiguous sign, because I'm assuming that she wanted me to know that she had at least viewed my profile, because she had left her settings to let people know that she had viewed others' profiles. I then proceeded to add her as a favorite, but it was short lived at best because she deleted me as a favorite on her end. I'm now beginning to think that she let me know that she viewed my profile to let me know that she had viewed it, knowing that I would look at my sent messages seeing that she had deleted my message to her, on top of deleting her favorite status with me. I suppose this roundabout way was taken by her in an attempt to let me down easy, which I will admit that her messaging me directly and telling me no directly would have stung a lot worse. I still have a miniscule flicker of hope that she still might contact me, and at this point I should just let it go. But I'm finding it rather difficult to do so because I'm continuing to play things over in my head and imagining what if in my head resulting unfortunately into an infatuation with her. Man, if I could just meet her, that help me realize whether or not I would truly be attracted to her, but that could end up blowing up in my face as well because if she told me she didn't like me in person that would send me straight to Dumpsville, population: me. But I'm wondering if maybe there's a one in a million chance that she might be waiting for me to make the next move, seeing if I will or not. Therein lies my dilemma: If I do, I fear that if I contact her again, maybe sending a rose or something, may indeed get her attention, but only in regards to reject me. Or perhaps, even if there is that one in a million chance that she was waiting for me to do something, she may respond more positively, but that contradicts somewhat with what I wrote to her. If I did, at least I'd know one way or another, but if I don't, I'm afraid the suspense would eat me up first. Worse yet, if I do contact her again she may construe that as harassment, and that is the LAST thing I would ever want to do to anyone. My oh my, this kinda stinks in a hurtful, wear your heart on your sleeve kinda way.   | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/5/2009 2:04:33 AM | ^^^^^^^^^
Oh brother! It's this type of over-analysing that gets people nowhere.
This is exactly why no-one on this site is meeting anyone - you know the girls are waiting on the guys to contact them - the guys are umming and ahhing about whether they should or shouldn't and so the story goes.
I've had a couple of situations where I felt like I was falling for the person. Love perhaps not but alot of like yes.
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/5/2009 6:10:00 AM | love is a complex emotion that requires great understanding.
you can fall in love, like I did when I was 15 with a girl I never met, but that feeling you get is a far fling from the embrace, heat, passion and romance of physical, touch, reality love.
I am in no doubt you are in love. You are asking the question Verissa. It's just how you perceive it. You should meet with this lucky fellow.
Only then will you how strong this love is. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/5/2009 8:20:35 AM | Why not accept your feelings??? Everyone keeps saying you can't feel what you know you are feeling! If you feel love, then it's love. Why not? You can love a penpal or an internet friend and have the exact same feelings as if you saw them in person.
Everyone is so quick to deny feelings. You feel love but "it can't be real"?
Give me a break, it's real. Anytime you feel something it's real.
Stop being so logical and analytical of feelings. Accept them. It's who you are. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/10/2009 4:21:10 AM | | Well, it has happened to me, we talked for 8 months; he was deployed to Iraq. Phone calls, cam to cam, IM conversations, emails at work etc etc...it was pretty real talking on a mic and seeing them on cam. It took a little while to get those feelings, but when I did that was it. We no longer talk (long story) been about 6 months and well I still think about him everyday....that's how I know that I loved him and just the thought of touching him in person; it still makes my heart race. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/10/2009 5:39:40 AM | | You cannot fall in love. What you can do is become very, very invested in the likelihood that you will fall in love when you meet that person. Been there, done that. This is why I will not engage in long email or telephone dialogue. | |
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Jskins
| | Joined: 3/4/2009
Msg: 1386 | |
| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 7/10/2009 12:59:20 PM | It absolutely is possible! those who say it isn't have closed minds and don't know a thing about true Love! I met my soulmate/wife online and because of health issues (Cancer) we didn't meet in person for over a year! I have never know any couple who was as close as we were. She passed away shortly after we were married.
When you meet online you get to know the true person inside and out. It's not about Sex or how good you look that day...it's about who you are inside and what your ideals are about.
Sorry for all the negative broken hearted people who think its impossible. It will never happen if you think negatively. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/9/2009 10:53:36 PM |
You cannot fall in love. What you can do is become very, very invested in the likelihood that you will fall in love when you meet that person
Think this probably sums it up quite well. It is certainly very possible to build a deep connection with someone online who you have never met but for there to be that chemistry on a physical level you need to meet.
In the old times people never met before they were married, they wrote letters to each other, maybe for the richer ones, would send a painting (most likely done to make the subject look much better than they are in real life) and they would get to know each other via the written word. Did it lead to love....or just the idea of love, who knows..... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 1:21:54 AM | Genuine love without meeting is mostly illusion. Too many people mistake intense
infatuation, lust, and imaginary love (and people have some pretty active
imaginations...lol) with "real" love.
People can build up passionate and profound interest after weeks or months of highly
charged communication and have a genuine spark and chemistry in person, but
meeting is still the key. To believe you can have a true, physical bond through a
bunch of wires is wishful thinking at best, highly delusional at worst. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 2:19:01 AM |
I've met a wonderful man. I find myself falling deeper and deeper. He is everything I never knew I always wanted. And yet we haven't met face to face. Is it...even plausible...to fall in love without ever meeting someone?
I didn't check your profile and don't know your age, but the answer is NO! Not "no" but Hell No.
What you've met is a wonderful writer. You haven't even begun to meet the man. What you've met are words on a page telling you exactly what you love to hear. That's not love. That's pure fantasy. I'm not saying he is, but what you need to understand is what he could be. Who knows. But that's the whole point. You don't! Stick to real life. It's more, uh, real. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 3:54:54 AM | ^^^^^^^^^^ Couldn't agree more. I never read all 55 pages either. Im going on my own experience. I "THOUGHT" i was in love with someone. All they were was a Wonderful Writer. How easy is it to express yourself as something your not on a computer screen. Just say what you think the person wants to hear and BAM,your in there. I met the person I thought i was falling for. And if im honest,we spent 7 months together and I did fall for him after meeting him . . only to discover he was just as good at lying on the computer,as he was to your face. He was like some sort of expert in it or something. Is there a class some of these people take that teaches them how to lie and get you to fall for them??? If people have met online,fallen in love and are still together 20 years later . . .they are just very very lucky people. But for the most . . . .i really believe you have to meet,get to know them,their quirky ways,their mannerisms,before you can truly know a person. You cant get all that from a computer screen. God, I could be a 67 year old transvetite (not judging anybody by the way) and none of you would be any wiser because its just a screen. I guess im only on here in the hope il be one of the very few lucky ones . . .but to actually be IN LOVE before having spent time,one to one,face to face . . .dont believe in it. Its merely a fantasy.
L x | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 4:00:50 AM | No, No, No!
To be in love with someone, you need fully know someone. Their faults, bad habits, quirk and the boring stuff. The average everyday things in life. Love isn't always about how they make you feel, but what you are willing to do for them. That is in a healthy and loving way. Its a complete and wholeness of knowing the person. Never meeting a person in person allows for futher completeness of a relationship. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 5:14:55 AM |
I never knew I always wanted. And yet we haven't met face to face. Is it...even plausible...to fall in love without ever meeting someone?
Well you have, so of course. Then when you meet you will have gotten all the formalities out of the way, you will then be able to get to know each other’s body language, you have got to know his mind and I personally think that is the hardest thing to do when you first met someone, as I like the touch, the caress of my neck, that wins me over EVERY time, but to have the knowledge that you already know each others minds, wow, good for you xx
I just hope both your pictures are of who they say they are!! That is the only problem I can see... If of course you have given pictures???
How can someone make you so happy and fulfilled when you've never laid eyes on one another? Is it possible?
Of course, it worked for you. Don’t doubt yourself be confident enjoy the moment. 
I mean looking at some of these pictures I fall in love every time I look at a different profile, well come on there are some very fit men out there!!
Cherie xx | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 12:42:41 PM | People who believe they're in love with someone they haven't met yet, even if they've
exchanged pics, videos, written long, drawn-out love letters, spoken on the phone for
hours, etc, are speaking to their fantasy of what can be, not the reality.
A couple needs to be "together" to explore a real relationship. As Sweetmusic wrote,
only then can you gauge true compatibility by seeing all the faults, idiosyncrasies, bad
habits, and irritating vices another has (and we all have them, let's not kid ourselves).
If you can get past them "in the long run", not just the first few giddy weeks and
months of blind puppy love, then your relationship has a real chance for success. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 1:17:31 PM |
To be in love with someone, you need fully know someone. Their faults, bad habits, quirk and the boring stuff. The average everyday things in life. Love isn't always about how they make you feel, but what you are willing to do for them. That is in a healthy and loving way. Its a complete and wholeness of knowing the person.
Ok, let me be Devil's advocate here. Is there such a thing as 'complete and wholeness of knowing a person'? I don't think you ever know someone completely. You may know more and more things as you go along, but at the same time that person is growing and changing. Like the fact that you can never step into the same river twice.
So, where exactly is the line that allows you to be 'in love' with someone, because you now know them enough? I thought once you know someone very well, you love them, but that the first infatuation is to be 'in love'? Semantics, I know, but isn't that what we're talking about here?
As others have written, isn't the state of being in love an emotion? And if we can feel that emotion, how can it not be real? Can that destinction only be made retro-activly? I mean, can I only say that I was in love with a person, if they turned out to be worthy, looking back? Someone mentioned that they fell for a liar. But didn't she still feel being in love at the time? So, wasn't that a valid feeling, even if he turned out to not be who she thought? How can the validity of our feeling in love be tied to the object of our affection?
Isn't the emotion itself that's important?
So, I'm with those that say that you can separate the feeling of being in love from having to be in the actual presence of the person. While I don't like internet dating, because I don't know if there's any chemistry (which to me is the deciding factor), I can't deny that I have been in the situation where I felt all the emotions of being in love. The giddyness, the looking forward to checking email or the phone to ring etc, without ever having met him. And when we met it didn't turn out as expected.
So, while I agree that we should not allow ourselves to get so involved before any actual meeting, I don't think we can actually say that it's not possible. I think it's a right brain vs left brain discussion. Our left brain says that it's not logical and therefore is not happening, but our right brain just feels the emotion and whether we want to deny them or not, they're still real. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 1:59:16 PM | We must make a simple but critical distinction here.
Love is thrown around a bit too cavalierly in our society.
I love chocolate, music, certain movies, maybe a celebrity, author, or public figure or
two, etc. That is purely an emotional tie to a concept and not an object, with little
physical connection other than the enjoyment I get out of consuming the product in
question, or being entertained, touched, and intellectually impressed by someone I'll
in all likelihood never meet.
That is totally different than loving someone for the purpose of a serious relationship
that may eventually lead to marriage. The emotional, spiritual, and financial
investment in that endeavor dwarfs the examples supplied above.
The context we're talking about in here is dating for the purpose of having a successful
relationship, not emotional attachment to a thing or concept.
Again, to fully realize that attachment you have to "meet" and be with the person over
time. To me there is no substitute for this, no matter how much one thinks they're
"in love" with someone indirectly through space. | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 2:16:55 PM | | You might call it love... More of infatuation though... I think what it is, is you taking what you know of the person... and creating a character that you want him to be... The only problem would be, you're building up your expectations super high.. When you finally do meet... He might be a huge disappointment. Which sucks... | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 4:04:14 PM | I haven't read the whole thread, so I don't know if this has been talked about (probably ;-) 0, but what i see here is that being 'in love' and 'loving' someone is being used interchangeably.
maybe I have this wrong, but I've seen many times discussions, where people distinguish between them. That there's a different definition between those 2 in a relationship.
So, my previous post was geared towards the first infatuation, which is normally called 'falling in love' and which I do believe can happen long distance, even if it may not be on the same level as a physical falling in love. But all emotions have degrees. I can be happy about having moved to a new city and being able to live near the Bay in a great house. But does that mean that I can't possibly be happy about the daily run with my dog or the ice cream cone that I'm eating? Just because they're not the same happiness does not mean that they can't be happiness.
But loving someone is when the relationship is established. That's when you know more about each other and possibly love each other despite our little ideosynchrocies ;-)
Isn't this thread about being in love? - and not about loving someone? | |
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| Is it possible to fall in love with someone you never met?
Posted: 9/10/2009 6:09:15 PM | As Motownman, indicated there are different kinds of love
Eros love is passionate love, with sensual desire and longing. The Modern Greek word "erotas" means "(romantic) love". The term erotic is derived from eros.
Agape love is one of several Greek words translated into English that this word represents divine, unconditional, self-sacrificing, active, volitional, and thoughtful love.
Varnia, to address your viewpoints, yes it is an emotion and yes love is a choice.
Perhaps a person can feel like they are “in love” because of how that person feels inside, without actually meeting the person. I would think a lot of these feelings involve a strong longing. They could happen without meeting the person, but I would think that it is more self involved.
Now Agape love, can grow from Ero’s love, we always can’t help who we are attracted or long for. In a healthy relationship, in person, choice is involved. Are you willing to sacrifice for the other person, even if it doesn’t make you feel all fuzzy inside all the time?
Hopefully, in a marriage, both types of love are present. It’s not always about passion and desire, it’s also about choice and sacrifice.
To address the 'complete and wholeness of knowing a person'. I would guess this just happens with time, interaction with each other. What that time period is, well I just don’t know.
At one time, I was very much in love, both Eros love and Agape love with my kids father (my ex husband). Over a long period of time, things changed. My “eros’ love for him faded with reasons of which are to personal too discuss here. I love him now through Christ and have a better understanding of things that happened. | |
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