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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 9/20/2006 10:18:18 AM | Well I don't know if the OP is genuine or not. Since he doesn't have a viewable profile you can't even make a guess.
But regardless, let's remove the OP from the statement and just allow it to stand on its own merit. Having said that, here are my comments.
a) I'm sure women do this too, not just men.
b) The issue isn't that married men are getting dates, it's that married men are pretending to be single, thus snaring single women and 'playing games' with them.
c) And yes, we (the single women) then become suspicious of the next man who comes along. We'd be fools NOT to.
If only there were some way to ensure that everything WE ALL say in our profiles is truthful. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 9/20/2006 10:27:15 AM | | who cares? there are idiots everywhere. there are also wonderful people everywhere. keep looking until you find the right one. if the women you talk to assume that you are one of the idiots, then piss on them. their loss. if the woman's profile says no married men, then its her problem if she gets involved. i have been the woman on the sh*tty end of the stick before, and you learn from it. i am hardly a bitter, jaded woman who does not trust men. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 9/20/2006 10:40:44 AM | I think thge married people that pretend to be single do it for a couple reasons both good and bad:
1. they are looking to cheat (is the obvious one) or
2. they don't want to be prejudged or ignored simply for being married (saying they are single allows them to be treated like everyone else)?
Granted this is a dating site, but if the person is just here chatting on forums and happens to be married, I don't really see the issue personally.
I don't like to just make assumptions until I get all the facts first. Yeah he may be looking for a fling, or he may just be some friendless stay-at-home Dad looking for other adults to talk to (besides his wife) while Junior is off at school at he has an hour free to himself. Who knows?
Until I know, I don't make judgements. Thats just me. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 9/20/2006 11:26:33 AM | "Well I don't know if the OP is genuine or not. Since he doesn't have a viewable profile you can't even make a guess"
Hey BryantinFL
F.Y.I
The OP is (or was)genuine,,,,,my original profile got deleted by accident.
But there must be some really guilty fishers out there,,because Im amazed that this thread has lasted this long!
I did b i t ch and complain about those types of guys..or girls,,but hey,,lifes too short to complain!So i did something about it and started hosting P.O.F.parties in my area,,which brings out the REAL people to my parties.
Like i said,,im amazed that this thead has lasted this long! | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:22:58 AM | | Hey PJ… I whole heartedly agree with what you are saying! I just thought that you should know that there are men here who have suffered through marriages that have left them lonely, neglected and or abused, yes, abused. I will agree that there are guys who are deceitful to fulfill their own selfish desires and prey upon unsuspecting single women here on POF. I for one feel that honesty is paramount when meeting ANYONE , weather it is here or in person. Lies and deception should be considered as abuse when it comes to the emotional damage that can result from finding out the actual truth, especially after investing time and emotional energy into a potential relationship. I guess I am responding to your post to both inform you and the “idiots” who lie, cheat and falsely portray themselves to smarten up! I clearly state in my profile who I am and what I am all about! I am married, I am not happy, I am lonely, but I will not leave my children fatherless, nor will I become a part time father and that is in my profile! I urge all men to be forthright in their profile, especially if you can’t post a picture due to extenuating circumstances, but be willing to provide a picture when asked. Be yourself. Be honest and treat women with the respect that they deserve. Above all, do not ruin the experiences of all who seek the single unmarried hopefuls who depend on the gracious free site to find their potential mate! | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:48:53 AM | Wow, I didn't relize how many liers, cheats and scumbags there are on POF, who think theres nothing wrong with their behavior.
Well Karmas a B*tch, can't wait till their lives fall apart after their husband wife leaves them with the kids (ya, , its automatic fault divorce) and takes all their money.
Have fun living alone and all your family, friends, and children look at you like the scumbags you are. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:59:45 AM | Dag PJ,
Sounds like you are having a hard time with the ladies. Maybe if you took a drink of confidence, you will lose the tast for hater-ade. I will bet that in the absence of married men and playas, you are still not the women choice. I'm not one of those, but I see the women that choose those types and not you overly sensitive, momma boy types. But you already know that. Don't hate the playa, hate the game. Its dirty, but it fair. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 1:50:25 PM |
Ill admit,,i was once like that once,,but it was simply a phase that i grew out of a long time ago and now im just looking for something more.There,,thats my rant!
Talk about controlling! So when you were going through YOUR phase, it was ok, but now that YOU'RE done with your phase, every other guy on earth should join a monastary while you go find your pure, untouched dream girl?
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rjm55
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Joined: 6/9/2008
Msg: 237 | |
| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 2:39:41 PM | | Wow! What different thoughts on this subject. I hate to admit.... I "was one of those guys".Before I started the POF journey......I was honest to a fault,the only women I'd had relationships with was my wife of 26 years. We married when I was 25. We are the envy of all our friends and family because we get along so well.Like a fool....I thought I was missing something. My wife...a wonderful girl and mother.....just seemed to take a great lifestyle for granted. Soooo.....I started looking around for conversation at 1st. I told anyone that I was married. Really didn't care for the type of woman that was responding.Soooooo.......I changed to seperated. Talked to a few that were nice but noticed the woman I wanted were looking for "not married". After fishy thru the profiles....I found a woman who was what I thought I wanted. She had no photo but was athlectic,smart,and seemed to be on the same wave length. So I contacted her and the 1st thing she wanted to know.."are you married"?I lied in a panic and said no.....divorced.Well......we talked alot and emailed each other. The more I got to know her,the more I liked. We even play tennis and had dinner. She scared the crap out of me because I really like her.What do I do now?I didn't have a plan.Luckily,I don't think she was as impressed as I was. She seem to enjoy our time but nothing lead me to believe anything physical was going to happen any time soon. So I continued to talk and chat with her but sensed someting wasn't right. A long story longer...I think she figured it out and have not heared from her. I feel like a piece of crap!I really hurt her even if she wasn't smitted by me. I'm truly sorry to her and my wife. They don't deserve this.How to I make amens??????????????????I have deleted my profile and the only reason for being on her was to see if she had posted something in this topic about me and to confess. My wife.......I can make it up to her.... and will. Donna, I'm sooooooo sorry!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 2:43:04 PM | Well, this is an old thread, but this ought to rile up some responses.
I'd have to say that in my opinion, players and married guys looking for a fling usually stick out like a sore thumb. I'd argue that women often (albeit not always) choose to ignore the warning signs, whether it's because he's tall, good looking, funny, a challenge, they think they can be the one to "change" him, etc.
At various points in my life, I've even been "fortunate" enough to be friends with both the player and the played. You could sit there and tell the woman that the guy's a womanizing player ... and she'd still want to go get played anyhow (or ask me for advice on how to change him, while their "relationship" heads to its all too obvious conclusion).
Anyhow, so while I appreciate the OP's scathing rebuke of all the players and married guys out there looking for a fling. I'd also argue that some of the women who frequent here complaining about players may really just need to re-evaluate their dating criteria. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 3:34:56 PM | Cheating is treating none of the women involved with respect...cheating is about self gratification, NOT respecting others
MSG # 232---
Be honest and treat women with the respect that they deserve
Edited to add--this applies to BOTH sexes | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 3:38:38 PM | Ok Let me just say I have had more than one "lady" do the sex in the city deal on me. They are players on both sides!
Blaming the player is just dumb, I have learned quickly how to tell the ones looking for a good time. I just quit talking to them. Funny how that works huh. Ladies if you think you are the one that will change him guess again!!!!! Find one that you don't want to change. I am not wasting my time on changing anyone. I am looking for the lady I don't want to live without not the one I have to change to be with!!!!
Also if she thinks all men are the same then why is she on here looking? The best thing to do there is just say NEXT!!!! Look we all have baggage for the past the smart ones set it down and walk away!
If you run across a man/woman that is a player move on.
Just my 2 cents!
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/18/2008 8:46:52 PM | There are male and female players all over...Sometimes it hard to spot one but when I do, "its real easy to turn the game right back around on them"....Besides the good ole "karma gods", grab these types sooner or later...Its funny when everyone has discovered their game and left them all alone to deal with their wretched ways"..
No big deal, there will always be players and cheats...My advice dont be one and be smart enough not to be played by one... | |
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42 4 U
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Joined: 2/18/2008
Msg: 242 | |
| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 12:16:36 AM |
Do you have any idea of the ballbreaking experience that a single man like me goes through when i try and talk,say hello or even strike up a conversation with a woman who has just dealt with,gotten screwed over or experienced a "man" like you???Its not pleasant because now you and your games have made it hard for the rest of us who are not married,a player and are just simply looking for a nice girl.
Hate to be the one to say it,but thats not why they're bitter and jaded.Its because they got duped,its the same as getting ripped off by some scammer.We all think we're smart enough to see it coming,but some players are very good at their game,and when a woman gets sucked in by one,she takes it out on all the "nice guys" that come her way.Its easier than admitting she got duped,after all the sex was probably hot,and she enjoyed it.But she wanted more,like most people do.So the solution for all of us is being honest about what we want. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 4:35:16 AM |
this is an open letter to every married man,player and idiots on Plenty of Fish looking for a side fling.Do you have any idea of the ballbreaking experience that a single man like me goes through when i try and talk,say hello or even strike up a conversation with a woman who has just dealt with,gotten screwed over or experienced a "man" like you???Its not pleasant because now you and your games have made it hard for the rest of us who are not married,a player and are just simply looking for a nice girl.Its a guy like me who deals with the bitter-jaded angry women and the mess you left because now she is assuming that Im the same guy that she just dealt with and lumps me in that category.The majority of women on POF that i have talked to have dealt with these idiots like you and assume that,,when they look at my profile and pic,,that im the same way and im only looking for one thing.Its very frustrating,because I know that I have nothing to hide on POF,i live in the city,I am a single,never-married soon to be 36 year old physically fit man with no children.I have a work schedule makes it somewhat impossible for me to meet new people.Heres a clue,,when a womans profile says no MARRIED men or players,then dont contact her!!It is in plain,clear,concise english!!!Heres some straight forward basic advice for the married "men",,either work on your marriage or get a divorce,,and while youre at it,,why not post a pic of yourself so we can all see who you really are!Players,,,well there will always be players.Ill admit,,i was once like that once,,but it was simply a phase that i grew out of a long time ago and now im just looking for something more.There,,thats my rant
You said itPJ!!!! I don't think I could have put it better myself.
It never ceases to amaze just how many married people are on here looking for a fling or side dish. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 1:11:57 PM | | what do you mean "after marriage you don't get sex"??? you must not be doing it right if your wife doesn't want to f*ck you. and again, if you are so unhappy and miserable, do something about it, there are options, mainly DIVORCE!! don't drag someone else into your sordid little lifestyle and try to screw up their lives just because your's is screwed up. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 10:00:40 PM | | OP you really need to stop hate'n... There will always be players both on the web and in real life.. However what you fail to mention is that women are much, much BETTER players then men. If your not good enough to play the game then I sugest that you sit your asss on the bench and pass out gatorade... Its obvious that its not "the game" thats keep'n you from get'n a date but your pusssy asss attitude.. There aren't many women out there who like soft men, incase you didn't know. | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 10:26:51 PM | | Seems that somewhere along the way someone told men that they should be sleeping with a woman by the third date. Then you get, "If you won't sleep with me, I'll find someone who will!", and they do. There's a profile there to read that tells it like it is. Do most men not know how to read? Can't tell you how many times I've asked a man, "What is there about my profile that you fail to understand?!!??" Are there any good, honest, men out there with integrity? Or are all the good ones taken and the only ones that are left are either gay or divorced and for a very good reason? | |
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| To Every Married Man or Player Seeking A Side Fling on POF
Posted: 6/19/2008 10:50:51 PM | Dood honestly you on here crying like a fag bro. Yeah your right all those ****ed up guys out there make it very hard for descent men like you and I to get a nice female. My SN says playa, but hey dont judge a book by its cover. I just think you need to sit back and look at the big picture though, instead of crying like a girl because you dont have the game to get ****......lol. When you meet a woman its that womans job to leave all that past stuff out the door. Its not your job to try and console her or earn her trust because some dumb idiot guy ****ed up her mind. Thats why its called getting to know someone new. Its Not called meeting someone and holding all the **** ups that other guys have made against you. So dont blame it on the player and idiot guys out there even though they are stupid. Stop wining grow some freaking balls and lay down the law to the next woman you meet. Tell her when you talk to me or go out with me, or when your getting to know me, she has to leave all her bad experiences at the door, because there not your fault and her ass shouldnt just assume your the same way. Tell her if she cant do that then she shouldnt even waiste her time with you.
Honestly though, I dont think your mad at all the ****ed up guys out there. I think your mad because you lonely, your****is hard, and you dont have enough game to get some ****.......lol. I mean Im not trying to be mean but come on lets be honest. that is your issue | |
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