| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 7:58:08 AM | I read Jarbarian's thread here and I followed it to a T and got my freaking heart ripped right the heck out of my chest and down through my place I urinate. I got back together six (6) times. I am a veteran!! I am proof it works !!
You can look all healed and all so fit and fun and come across that you are casual and don't NEED her back and yep you can mesmerize her and hook her. I know I am proof. Then what, just so she can have yet another chance to hurt you but this time finish you? Yep, I love love love this thread AND IT WORKS!
It was so MUCH FUN winning her back. Then as I was picking up my dead limp body off the road of cheatsville, I learned something, the thread should have said, "So, you want closure do you?". hahaha | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 8:17:33 AM | ^^^6 times? Did you forget number 13?
13. ACCEPT THAT SOME THINGS JUST AREN'T MEANT TO BE
I guess you didn't follow it exactly to a tee. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 8:31:17 AM | | Oh stop squirrly 1. How do you know it is not meant to be ? HEY ? (You're just guessing is right) Oh it was meant to be alrighty. I think we should go for #7 !! I am still breathing. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 8:38:08 AM | i have just read your piece of work and i must say it really makes alot of sence u have great sense and insight. i tend to think on the same lines but uve made it so clear and spot on
well done :} | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 8:43:05 AM | | Wow!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This statement is so true to fact! That you hitting the nail on the head! | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 9:41:40 AM |
Oh stop squirrly 1. How do you know it is not meant to be ? HEY ? (You're just guessing is right) Oh it was meant to be alrighty. I think we should go for #7 !! I am still breathing.
oh what was I thinking? Go ahead...I am sure you can find all kinds of orifices for your heart to be ripped out of your chest and pulled through. What fun. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 10:06:39 AM | Squirrelly 1, I was being sarcastic . The thread should have at least discussed the extreme hazards of not seeking final CLOSURE . It should have qualified the reader to points lists of those who are eligible to even suffer a 2nd chance and pointed out relationships that are destructive. It is an affective point on how to win them back but needs a warning label for those who should not be eligible for a second chance. ONE LINER like you pointed out #13 is hardly a warning label and hardly covers the sheer veracity of the horror about to follow in the hands of a bleeding heart.
It should have a warning label or a advisory sticker.
PLEASE BE ADVISED! Going back for a 2nd chance is extremely hazardous and in some cases actually fatal . There are cases of humiliation, hangings, jumpers, losses of fortunes and complete withdrawing of life. Please seek the advice of a doctor and psychologist before attempting. The same issues will surface and you will have your heart ripped more thoroughly out of your chest and some cases men have been sent to jail. WE STRONGLY ADVISE AGAINST A 2ND CHANCE. (but buy this kit, it is meant for entertainment purposes only) | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 10:26:50 AM | You know its funny about this word CLOSURE that we all like to use.
Almost like you can mend a hole in the fabric of your life. You can't mend it.
You have to learn to live with it. It doesn't happen overnight. Its just learning to accept that they just don't love you....at least not the way you love them. Will that feeling you have ever end? Maybe not. But you have to get used to knowing that it is not reciprocated.
(oh and PS. killerdogsmooch - my comment was sarcastic too. LOL) | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 10:59:43 AM | In theory it makes sense , but deep inside I wonder sometimes whether I haven't worked on the relationship hard enough the first time around.
People can learn from their mistakes they made in the past and by doing so it COULD work even better the second time around.. . Once it doesn't work on the second try then both parties know at least it wasn't meant to be . Again - just a theory. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/17/2007 11:11:01 AM | The author presented this affective information and did not worry about the dangers. CONSIDER the source. He is a jet bike racer, the most deadly sport in the world. He is braver (or crazier) than most. He was a marine. He blocked a drunk from driving. He plays guitar on a stage infront of millions of people. The last time I had the pleasure of talking to him on the phone he had broken his collar bone while racing.
The reader is vulnerable and hurt and Line #13 is nothing more than a lure not a warning. Eagerly people read it and say wow, hope, if that is all I have to worry about I can do this. KA-BLAM hurtsville.
We have a responsibility to worry about our fellow man. You can't present hope like this to someone that vulnerable and just not mention what will definately occur. Maybe I don't race Jet bikes for a reason, and maybe when vulnerable people are hurting they don't listen to that self protection voice in the back of their heads. (hence the name Jarbarian, sounds like a warrior to me, and not a concerned politician) | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/20/2007 12:13:20 AM | Jarbarian is short for "Jarhead the Barbarian". I am, afterall, a former US Marine.
Cheers :) | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/24/2007 12:56:49 PM | | OP: good post and so true. re confidence: i've run across persons who are physically/objectively maybe a 6 or a 7 and their personality (usually a combination of charming, innocent, bubbly, and confident) somehow makes them seem more physically attractive. all of a sudden, i'm thinking the person (whether male or female) is physically 2 notches above what the person really is. funny how the mind works. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/24/2007 2:42:46 PM | | to msg 887: damn cre8tv, i gotta agree...when in doubt, do naught. (my mother always said that...and she purposefully made "naught" rhyme with "doubt." then again, she was english, so maybe it rhymes over there.) anyway, great adage. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/24/2007 2:48:30 PM | | to msg 852 (btw, i started at page 37 and going backwards): 8 months is more than enough time. i'm surprised you two stuck together for so long if one of you wasn't feeling it. well, she gave it a chance. gotta come to reality at some point. give her credit for that. now, you need to move on, sweetie. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/25/2007 7:17:31 AM | | I suppose this might work for flighty people who just frivilously throw things away when there is nothing wrong with them... they just got bored. When I have a relationship that comes to an end, that's the end. I don't throw anything away unless it no longer serves a purpose to me. Sometimes I hold on to such things longer than I should, but when I finally come to the point where discarding it is the only thing that makes sense, I don't want it back. Whether it's home electronics, car parts, or a relationship... I don't want a second go-round once I've reached the "so long, farewell," stage. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/26/2007 10:46:34 AM | | TGH: The main point of this thread is how to heal in the shortest amount of time possible, not how to scheme to win someone back that doesn't want to be with you. Read the last step in the guide. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/26/2007 12:29:46 PM |
hold on to such things longer than I should, but when I finally come to the point where discarding it is the only thing that makes sense, I don't want it back. Whether it's home electronics, car parts, or a relationship... I don't want a second go-round once I've reached the "so long, farewell," stage
TGH: I agree with you to some extents however I just won't compare relationships with things like electronics & car parts. I simply value persons & relationships more than things...
Anyway, to speak from my personal experience...I have always wanted a second chance when the relationship came to an end before the closure (the final stage of grief & letting go). Once I let go, I never would want it back again. I don't RECYCLE. I take relationships too serious to let them go easily in the first place..... but once I let go it means I have exhausted all the possibilities to make them work.
So anyone who wants a second chance means that you haven't let go yet. You are still holding on to the past (not necessarily that the past was pleasant, but maybe you are afraid of uncertainties & unknown in the future.) If the relationship ended last time because the other party gave up on me....why would I think he/ she is going to do it right again this time?
My 2 cents...
DG | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/27/2007 9:12:07 PM | | wow, thank you very much I really needed to read those things .You would not belive how much it has helped me. I am going to follow the rules, to be totally honest I was doing everything you said not to do short of the stalking, that is just not a good thing. I was text/e-mail/ and calling and talking to him and felt needy and just gross and would cry all night over him, it has been a couple of days now and you know I feel better and I have not cried in the last two days about our break up. I amgoing to stick to the rules and if he comes around fine and if he doesn't that is ok to as I am happy with or without him I do not need him to make me happy, I was fine befor he came into my life and I will be fine again. So thank you for all your words of wisdom.If you have anymore words to share please do..... | |
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sandyf
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Joined: 10/8/2006
Msg: 920 | |
| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 2/27/2007 9:26:45 PM | | No, i can honestly say i dont want a second chance. what???? to do all those things again? no, I want the chance to see him 6 feet under, begging God for mercy, cause he was too stupid to see the gifts that God had given him and my unconditional love. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 3/2/2007 11:30:01 PM | Everyone, please forget about second chances if you were the one who got dumped. We all want to believe that one day our ex will change their mind and want us back, but that is just wishful thinking. If they're not contacting you, then they've obviously moved on. The only time someone calls back to get back together is when it's the person who got dumped. From my experience, when I've dumped a girl I've never had any second thoughts about it. Same for the girls that have dumped me. None of them have ever made an attempt at reconciling.
BEST ADVICE TO GETTING OVER YOUR EX:
If you truly understand and believe in what I'm about to say I GUARANTEE you will get over your ex so much quicker. Here it is: We are all creatures of habit. We adapt to our surroundings and the people around us rather quickly. We easily get addicted to someone we're in love with out of habit. Please know that obsessing over an ex is just like being addicted to drugs. You know its not healthy for you so you have to break the addiction. When you think of your ex co-relate them with being crack-cocaine and heroine all rolled up into one. This way you will know that you must stop obsessing over them otherwise it can emotionally damage you in the long run the way drugs slowly kill you. The drug analogy sounds harsh, but I'm sure it gets the point across.
Focus on finding someone new and forget about your ex. The new love interest will be your new habit replacing your old habit(the ex). Please look at your ex as a bad habit you must quit like smoking.
If what I just wrote helps just one person, then this post has served its purpose. Good luck! | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 3/4/2007 12:04:25 AM |
So anyone who wants a second chance means that you haven't let go yet. You are still holding on to the past (not necessarily that the past was pleasant, but maybe you are afraid of uncertainties & unknown in the future.) If the relationship ended last time because the other party gave up on me....why would I think he/ she is going to do it right again this time?
There's no guarantee they will. The point of the main post is how to get yourself healthy and in the right frame of mind so that if a second chance does come along you'll be better apt to know if it's indeed right for you or not.
I also truly believe that people who really love you would not walk away from you. Hence #13.
Cheers. | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 3/5/2007 9:08:32 AM | Jarbarian,
I just wanna thank you for posting this forum. I'm trying to get over a breakup right now. It's hard at the beginning, but each day it gets a little easier. Your words of wisdom is priceless. Especially the NO CONTACT rule. The rule about pulling away when the other person pulls away is great too. It is a way of keeping your dignity intact. For when you chase someone you are just feeding the other person's ego. It's great to see how you've inspired so many people here. Keep doing what you're doing. Peace! | |
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| So you want a second chance?
Posted: 3/6/2007 8:57:51 AM | | wow thank you!! i will try and follow this but its so hard not to "stalk" her and find out who shes with. but ill try.... | |
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