| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/12/2006 11:04:33 AM | | just played this and its bullshit, I'll never do it again...waste of time. If a girl ever says to me she needs time and space again, ill just walk away cause that girl has to be unsure of things anyways to need space. Not worth the fight. But to answer this post, i got the "i need time and space"...lol was to wait til something better came along. Played. Cee4 is not the one who is right i think, i think Belinda_Stephanie hit it right on the head of the nail. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/12/2006 1:19:18 PM | Hello=) I undestand that when it I need space, like the post before this is just basically f**k off etc.. Why not just I don't want to be with you, yeah it may hurt but at least its honoest and no games are played. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/12/2006 6:39:24 PM | tell you what it means.
Got the same line suddenly from a wife of 15 years......I played the space game, she came back later, but things were never the same. Too many lines had been crossed, the face of the woman I once adored, was now only a grim reminder of her cheating. I finally let her go, a week after she came back......I just could not get the feeling for her back......I mistrusted her. so I told her this, and sent her away.
If you take her back, you are in for some pain man! a hundred times worse than your feeling now. you wont feel love when you look upon her.....you will feel hurt and anger, like she has violated something sacred, (and she has)
Most assuredly there is another man in her life. There were two in my situation. send her packing, dont look back.
The strange thing about women ( there may be exceptions but I know of none) Is that a woman will usually line up another boyfriend BEFORE they compeletly break up with the current one. They dont like "down time" to be alone. A man will usually just cut it clean, and then look for another,
What she is REALLY saying is simply, she is not so sure of the new relationship yet, and would like to string you out just in case it fallls apart, to have a reserve. if you let her get away with this, I will bet this tractor you see in my picture against a coo coo clock, that she WILL do it again........
Women are strange creatures man, I adore them, but what they say, and what they do, is usually two different things. you have to pay attention to the little subtle messages, and not always talke a statement at face value.
Chin up !
ToumbstoneTom(Andy) | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 1:33:17 PM | I've read every post on this thread, and I agree with the one's who told you to move on with your life. The reason why you're even considering dating her again is because you've never truly gotten over her. Quite frankly I think she treated you shitty with the 'space thing'. Also your other dating experiences didn't work out because you were still pining for this woman. You should be strong and tell her you have moved on and would like to continue dating other's until you find someone that you have more in common with.
From experience i can tell you that the two of you will probably do fine for a month or so and then it'll be the same thing all over again. Do you wish to be a slave to every whelm she may have at the moment? Getting over someone you love is hard, but it can be done. You should go your own way and give her permanent space!   | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 3:46:19 PM | | Mine started say that about 2 months ago then ended up going on a vacation and cheated on me.you may not of been dumped you just been put in the toy box for awhileor she is trying to find out whats out there so terad carefully and try to feel the situation out and see if she keeps pushing ou away.Or just leave her alone out right and see if she drawn back to you.JUst keep a balance between the two of you she may come back or may not and if she leaves let because down the road some have know to come back | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 4:28:27 PM | | This same thing happened to me last year in July....on my birthday. We were already engaged and then one day out of the blue, she says it isnt going to work out and she has to clear up some stuff in her head. It really sucked. I was very close to her 10 year old daughter also. She was beginning to call me dad and bought me a Fathers Day gift last year and a Fathers Day card. It has been a rouhg year fomr me since then. It has really made it hard to get involved with anyone that has kids because I can not go through that again. Hang in there man I am rooting for you. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 4:40:42 PM | sorry pal,
went through this recently..it's very painful ,i know and feel for you brother..it's time to move on though..i thank you for asking because this is very cathartic for me personally..if like me you have a hard time giving up this girl , things for you will only get bleaker..from my experience things got pretty low to the point my 15 yo son was ready to slap me in the face..listen do yourself a favor and do something to distract yourself like walk jog golf something physical..
ciao and good luck.. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 4:49:41 PM | LEAVE IMMEDIATLY... not a good thing to hear. "I need some space"
b u l l s h i t.
the best reply: OK, Babe. here is a plane ticket to Cape Canaveral. Have fun.
Don't let the thing drag on for a year or two, " I need my space" or other variants...means "I'm gonna leave your a s s ---sooner or later."
a clue to avoid dragging out a relationship and making things harder on yourself later. | |
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pshy27
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Joined: 4/20/2006
Msg: 186 | |
| when girls say they need space
Posted: 7/13/2006 5:07:20 PM | i can honestly tell you that when a girl tell you she need her space it means that its over, something is wrong with the relationship i know cause i went through it not to long along ago so good luck and do with it as you wish just watch out for your heart  | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 8/12/2006 8:48:03 AM | i say.. give her her space & find someone that will appreciate u being around.. y was she "hiding" behind an email & not tell u 2 ur face?..
and when someone says they need their space.. it usually means that u could be suffocating them by wanting 2 do EVERYTHING together & not giving that person their space 2 breath.. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/3/2006 9:23:37 PM | | this girl got involved elsewhere and it didnt work out, now she is coming back to you for a safe haven...all this means is she will stick around til the next one...say no thank you and move on...you can do better...my opinion...you are now second choice.... | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/6/2006 4:41:59 PM | | This is exactly right. She might be trying to let you down gently, but I think it's more you are crowding her space but you have qualities she loves and is still undecided. Give the girl her space! Where is this guide on second chances? I'd like to read it. If you are so right on in this post, I'm sure your guide is interesting and informative. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/6/2006 4:50:16 PM | Sorry, I'm new to this. I was responding to Jarbarian's post below. I thought when I responded to the post it would show on my message but it didn't so I am now copying and pasting it. I know this from my own past experience with a guy. Here is what I was referring/responding to:
when girls say they need space
Posted: 3/24/2006 4:09:35 PM
When a woman says "I need space" it could mean a couple things.
A. You're too clingy/needy or
B. She's getting ready to break up with you or
C. A and B
The best thing you can do in this situation is PULL BACK IMMEDIATELY. No calls, no emails, no text, no drunk dialing, no stalking - NOTHING.
Pull back, get your bearings straight and let HER contact you. Give her some time, distance and space. Do be ready for the most likely scenario which is her breaking up with you. Women take much longer to decide to leave men but once they do their minds are pretty much made up.
Any attempts you make right now to cling to her will be met with utter futility and only lead to push her further away from you.
You might want to read my guide on second chances. At lot of what I have written on there explains the best way to recover from a relationship and quite possibly set up a second chance or reconcilliation.
Again, the first thing you need to do is back away from her. Back far, far away. When someone wants their space the best thing you can do is give it to them. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/6/2006 7:41:20 PM | Helpful thread indeed, and to the OP, I'm sorry you had to go through such a shitty experience with someone who you had been close to for a long time and cared about a great deal.
It hurts enough when it happens even in the short term - but we survive all the stronger for it, and have the capability to really learn some lessons in the process.
needing space is a crap argument. if she was growing apart, wouldn't you discuss it within the context of the relationship? no. she didn't have the courage to do that. if she met someone else, did she have the courage to say that? no.
Thank you Bikeman - very well said. I've come to the conclusion it's a cowards stock phrase as well, and not the words of a mature adult capable of really caring about another.
i don't know what it means when a guy breaks up with a lady and tells her "i need space". if any lady has heard this, please expound on the circumstances.
See above - it doesn't seem so much gender specific as gutless specific. I would like to give the guy who gave me the "space" call the benefit of the doubt here, but the bottom line is: why wait around? Even if nothing better comes along for him and he gets in touch with me after sufficient space has elapsed, am I not more worthy of respect than this?
So never mind HIS lack of respect - I have too much respect for myself to let him hold the reins and be in control of this situation. He's lost my trust, and there's no going back.
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/6/2006 8:14:04 PM | hi roses too bad you're on the other side of the hemispheres. you seem like a str8 shooter--you're man is certainly fortunate if you have one. good luck to you sweetie!   | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:14:30 AM | Well what it means is she wants her space and freedom, I'm there right now. I met a great guy, everything I would want any other time, he wants to get serious, talks about the long term future, asked me to go to Niagara and get married,  I just met him recently, I'm sure he was joking, but he is looking for more than me, I'm sure of that much, and as far as being a girlfriend right now, not for me, I'm just not into getting serious, I am not looking for a commitment, I 'need' my space. I still love to spend time with a great guy, love men, always will, but honestly, talk of relationships makes me not want to talk to the person again, been there for too long. I will want one again sometime, not sure when, not for at least a year or two and not now. So when she says she needs space, she needs space, probably will still see you if you don't try to tie her down. Times are changing. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/7/2006 11:26:25 AM |
So when she says she needs space, she needs space, probably will still see you if you don't try to tie her down.
Maybe if the two of you haven't yet been intimate. Otherwise it's GENERALLY a cop-out BS excuse to string a guy along, keep him convenient. I really don't know why men and women, if they are having relationship issues, just spell it out instead of hedging their bets. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/7/2006 12:35:02 PM | ^I agree with you, if I feel the guy is looking for more, which is now the case for me, I don't string him along, I just call it off and explain why. It's the right thing to do, it's not good to play with people's emotions. I try to treat others as I want to be treated.
The thing for me right now, is I really just want to keep my options open, if I get into a relationship, I will be with just that one person, it will be harder and harder to get out of and I don't want only one person for the next several years, been tied down too long and want to date different people now, see what's out there, not get serious the first one that wants to, or anyone right now. That could be what a girl means when she says she needs space, but maybe it's just me.
Sorry you are having a hard time, sounds like you really like her and are getting hurt, my advice is that you have to look out for yourself, only you can decide what to do. We can't control how other people act or treat us but we can control how we react and handle things. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 12/7/2006 1:09:01 PM | Hi MK, my comments weren't directed at you per se. Just don't tell this guy "I need space" when you really mean "I don't want only one person for the next several years, been tied down too long and want to date different people now, see what's out there, not get serious the first one that wants to, or anyone right now."
"I need space" rings SHALLOW. Your explanation is concise, precise, and clear. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 4/19/2007 11:16:29 AM | I personally have had this happen to me several times, my favorite being...she loves you, then only to say a time later that she loved you but isn't in love with you. If you don't know the difference, you shouldn't tell someone in the first place. But that is neither here nor there, and I getting dumped in an email is about her character, respect, and integrity.
The best advice is leave her go, date other girls, and let her know about it. Usually the way to get her back is to make her miss you, and know you are with others. The need space means you are being too needy and too clingy. Read the below except what a friend of mine told me that made me open my eyes.
Okay listen up...
I am going to reveal to you the number
#1 mistake men make when it comes to attracting
and dating beautiful women.
What do you think is the reason why most guys
out there just can't get a date, a number or
a kiss from a woman?
It's because they treat every single woman
like a princess and put them on a pedestal
... whereas they should really treat them
like their little bratty sister. This is
what gets women attracted and fall in love with you.
If you act like a clingy, needy nice-guy then
no wonder women tell you that they just want
to be friends with you.
When you see an attractive woman, what do you
do to get her attention? Do you go up to her and
pay her a compliment? Do you ask her if she wants
a drink? Do you tell her how beautiful she is?
Do you introduce yourself and ask what her name is?
Man, why do you make me bang my head on my
keyboard? You won't get a woman to give you
her phone number like that! Now look, most
guys think that to successfully attract a
woman, you need to be nice to them, drive
a sports car, have a load of cash in your
wallet and work out every week just to look
a bit like Arnold.
You couldn't be more wrong. It's all bullshit!
In fact, you may have just made the biggest
mistake in your life when it comes to women
and dating. Every guy on this planet has been
brainwashed into the belief that women will
want to be with you if you are nice to them,
treat them like a princess and pay for drinks
and dinner.
You couldn't be further from the truth. But it's
not your fault. Blame TV, Hollywood and magazines.
You have been conditioned to believe that this is
what makes women get attracted to you.
Now listen, me and many of my friends who
are true ladies-men aren't rich, good looking
or handsome. We're just regular guys like you.
But we can get so many phone numbers from women
one single day you wouldn't even believe me if
I told you.
So what's our secret? How do we do it?
It's because we tease women, we accuse them
of hitting on us, bust their balls and are
cheeky when we talk to them. We are the
complete opposite of what a clingy nice-guy
does. We don't offer them drinks, we don't
pay compliments and we certainly don't invite
them to a romantic candle light dinner.
And guess what?
They LOVE us for that. Women get attracted and
want to be with men that are different from all
the other guys they have dated in the past...and
we give them precisely that.
So if you want to be able to do the same and
literally get women to fight for YOUR attention,
start treating them like your bratty little sister
and say "HEY! Will you stop staring at my ass all
the time? I'm not a sex-object you know?"
Once you truly GET IT what makes women
attracted to men, you can write your own
ticket in the dating world.
I hate to say it...but this works, and your choice is simple....move on for you, and her, and if she still wants you she will come back, otherwise you are better off. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 4/19/2007 11:29:49 AM | | Hey dude......there is another dude. this is a common line used by people who are cheating/having affairs. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 4/19/2007 11:38:35 AM | This is just a **** way of saying "its over". The reason why most younger girls use this game is because they are generally gutless and want to have a guy on a backburner in case her new guy (believe me, there is one... maybe a new acquaintance, a guy she met at a bar, school, whatever) doesn't work out. She could then come back to you. Be a man and kick the useless****to the curb my friend.
If you want to be really cruel and show you care as much as she does (which isn't much apparently), you could sleep with her one last time, then dump her after you get off hehe. | |
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| when girls say they need space
Posted: 4/19/2007 11:52:17 AM | id say that its over hun, I know if I tell a guy I need space which isnt offen!!!
its a kinda way of breaking up with them cos you dnt want to say the words I dnt love you any more or its over, so its easyer to say "I need space" that way she doesnt feel so guilty and hopes that youll get the message. but thats only my opinion!!! | |
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