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Posted: 3/25/2006 8:31:52 PM | Garf:
Aside from somehow managing to be born about thirty years later than I actually was, and lying about how much I smoke, what can I do to improve my profile? I refuse to lie....can't see what the point would be in the long run.
TIA.
Signed,
Just curious | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 28 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/25/2006 9:06:05 PM | nodule:
That was the most choreographed rant I've ever seen in my life.
Your sock drawer is arranged by colour and state of decay, isn't it? 
You've obviously got a specific sense of humour, but I can picture your delivery being very wooden, and a lot of people probably don't get your jokes because of it.
Try to ease up and relax before revising your profile. Write the same stuff, but let it flow a little less structured, and a little more organic.
Read my profile for an example...just don't copy it, or I'll pull out the left side of your soul.
Good stuff, neatly arranged...but you say nothing about who YOU are, although I can get a good idea of what type of person you might be.
You also don't specify what you're looking for, nor do you leave any openings for icebreakers. Say something that forces the women to ask a question.
As long as it doesn't involve Star Wars, or Star Trek , or anything like that.
Your first date is spectacular, and I'm gonna steal it for myself when you die of natural causes next week.
Get a pic that's a little more candid, and a bit less mugshot.
Tall Dark and Random...I love it, lol.
Add some interests that aren't so attuned to the glee club, or the National Full Contact Chess Club, and you're all set to go. | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 31 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/25/2006 9:28:56 PM | tarheel1943:
First off...the pics.
I love the classy style of the black and white pic.
The blue dress pic is great, but you're too far away...can you get another one, but a closer view?
The main pic is kinda...not so great, but I think it's just the hat. Yeah, I just double checked...it's the hat.
Put Gardening in your interests.
You swore! shrimp çocktail <--cut and paste this in the place of your dirty word.
Honestly, you've written an exceptional profile.
Hopefully, men get more attentive when we age, so the ones who will be reading your profile will take the time to read the whole thing. 
Maybe change your "good things come in small packages" line to something like, "Lonely toolshed: Needs handyman." or something, lol.
Good stuff! | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 32 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/25/2006 9:35:44 PM | Nodule, it was my first impression, sorry 'bout that. It's good though, just inject some Fonzie into it.
H.Q.E.:
I got to the header, and thought..."women get this far, stop...and look somewhere else."
Not a good first impression.
Funny to me. I laughed...but you're not trying to impress guys, are you? lol...
Think of a better header that wouldn't get you slapped if you used it in person.
Substitute rubber chickens with "cross dressing hamsters" and you're all set with the first date.
But seriously...take the time to write something of substance in the "About Me" section.
Refer to the first post of the thread for sugestions. | |
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Posted: 3/25/2006 10:47:59 PM | Constructive advice so far, so I'm throwing my hat into the ring. I just joined this site,
so I'll be interested to hear what you have to say. | |
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Posted: 3/26/2006 10:12:06 AM | Thanks for the kind critique, Garf. I'm working on it. I appreciate the cut and paste suggestion but as it turned out, that deletion may be my favourite part of the whole profile. I'll work on getting a better full length picture taken.
Thanks again for your time. | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 37 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 10:25:40 AM | Tarheel, I'll look forward to seeing the new revisions soon, and you're welcome.
ÜberTeddy: The name rocks, lol...ÜberTeddy...
I'd still leave out the part about you being an uncontrollable drunk.  I know that's probably not what you meant by it, but some women might see it that way.
Looks a lot better though, good luck to you!
lili_marlene:
A Liberal?!? oh...I don't know if I should help you...
Actually, I scoured your profile for any little thing I could nitpick at, and I'm stumped.
The only thing I would suggest, aside from getting pics that show you outdoors to add to the collection; would be to say something about your future, as opposed to your past.
Other than that, it's perfect.
Too bad you and ÜberTeddy live so far apart, lol... | |
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Posted: 3/26/2006 11:12:01 AM | I'm considering revising the liberal part... my intent was not to express an affiliation with our corrupt party but rather a generalization of my political leanings. Trying to get away from the whole "Albertans love Klein" stereotype :)
I think I will take you up on the outdoor picture idea, I really hate the body shot, it's too fuzzy and not flattering. Also, I'll think about the future idea... but then I'd actually have to plan for my future in some abstract way, and that seems like a lot of work :P
Thanks for your input! | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 39 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 11:32:42 AM | lol, but all Albertans really DO love Klein!
Try to get a more casual/less posed shot, though. Don't stand facing the camera directly, it's too 2D.
Abstract is good, it gets me a lot of attention, that's for sure.
I forgot to mention; the second pic you have, where you're sitting back from the camera, (also wearing glasses) would probably be a better choice for a main pic.
Good luck! | |
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| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:01:01 PM | Ok, changed my main pic and changed the wording on the liberal referance.
I have a friend coming into town this weekend, so I'll make her take some more casual shots and come back for the honest truth. | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 42 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 12:19:31 PM | ladyluck555:
You're obviously very active, and quite possibly very attractive as well. Can we see a close up?
The interest "Too many to list" is a non-interest. List them. When you list an interest, and other people share that interest; it turns blue, and becomes a link to other profiles of people you have something in common with. (I'm putting this in bold for easy reference in future reviews.)
What kind of music? What kind of activities? Set yourself up for some ice breaking questions. It'll help avoid the ever so popular and loved, "Hi there. Wanna hook up?  " emails...well, no it won't...but it'll help the normal guys with a topic of discussion other than the standard fare.
The "About You" line is something I always like to see.
You were out of ideas for a first date when you wrote your profile, weren't you, lol.
Less ambiguous, tell him what you're doing for a first date. Guys are lousy planners.
Your main pic is great, don't change it! | |
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kmhstx
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Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 43 | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 44 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 1:08:26 PM | Thanks Kerry,
Here's yours:
First, the pic that has the date in red LED...that should be your main pic.
It's a little darker than I usually like, but it's a better pic overall.
You have some pretty good goals, albeit short term with long term effects...this is really good, but shed a little less light on it.
Spice up your profile a bit with an anecdote or something.
Go read my OP for more general hints.
Other than that, you're here looking for friends, so the profile is very suited already. | |
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Posted: 3/26/2006 4:11:49 PM | Yes, please Garf.
Martin responded to my request for feedback, but no one else did. I read Busgirl's posted comments and tried to change some things around. | |
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Garf
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Joined: 4/4/2005
Msg: 49 | |
| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 5:15:55 PM | birdy267:
Busgirl...lol, I'll have to show her that. It's Bucsgirl.
Here goes:
First, the boat cruise pic would be the one I would use as the main pic, since it's brighter, clearer, and shows you doing something you're interested in.
You use 22 "I" statements in the main body.
Suggestions: "...kind of lady, and I enjoy culture..." to read "...kind of lady who enjoys culture..." (That kind of segue.) Cut out about half of those "I" statements if you can.
Try to arrange your topics a little neater, rather than seemingly randomized. You're kind of all over the place.  It's a bit confusing.
You make reference to a photo that isn't in your profile? (I'll assume that's an oversight when you did an overhaul at some point.)
Your date idea sounds pretty basic, I would suggest finding out what sort of entertainment or possibly even boat tours are in your area, and mentioning going to one of those events.
Perhaps an offer to go to on one of the Pathway canoe tours (if they still have them) or something that will be fun for both of you.
The overall length is great, it's a fairly precise profile that explains exactly who you are and what you want. Try to keep that focus when remodelling.
I'll review it again when you finish, if you want. | |
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| Well everyone else is doing it.
Posted: 3/26/2006 5:18:05 PM | Garf.
You sweet hunk you, You are doing a wonderful job.
Sometimes, hun this can be a thankless job, but I think you know that.
Keep up the good work. 
CC | |
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Thanks so much for the imput!