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Posted: 11/13/2006 11:28:15 AM | wayup...............one day my friend you'll find a woman who can make a "good boy" go BAD and then you'll undersand you've found a "real woman". There's nothing on the planet like it.
Patients my friend, for as they say for every dog "there's a bone". | |
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Posted: 11/13/2006 11:45:32 AM | I agree, we all have to LIKE how someone else looks. If I like the way a man looks it doesn't matter to me if no one else does...or if everyone else finds him attractive.
As far as all the other comments about a man's confidence or money...that might have some impact on the total package. After all WHO really is seeking a mate that has no job, no car and no means in which to date you and still lives at home, or any other reason that is not desirable? I am self sufficent and expect the same from a man. So many so called 'nice men' turn ugly once they realize you are not interested....and there are a host of reasons to NOT find someone else interesting. Self reflection might be in order vs calling everyone else shallow....or even chalk it up to fate...don't take everything so personal. There is someone else out there waiting to meet you. | |
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Posted: 11/13/2006 12:30:09 PM | Say no more am looking for a Desent man . Say no more. come try to get to know someone diffrence.I'M Here waiting for you. if you dont contact me it's your Fault not mine. | |
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TraeC
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Joined: 10/31/2006
Msg: 29 | |
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Posted: 11/13/2006 1:51:11 PM | belizean, you're right, if they don't contact you it is their fault. They want us to accept them, yet we have to be perfect? What gives? As far as the guys who say women only want men with money, that's just not true. The last two guys I dated were both broke, one lived with his boss and the other with family. I didn't care, it wasn't their money I was interested in. I have my own money. Oh, and neither one was "hot" either, just average looking guys. Now I wanna know where are the guys who like the nice women? The guys who don't have weight requirements and restrictions? Us nice women are here looking for nice men, we just don't look like Barbie dolls!  | |
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Posted: 11/16/2006 9:50:18 AM | this is nonsense !!!!!
the lies here are really something to behold
I have the greatest job imaginable-- very secure -- very happy
WOMEN --- admit it PLEASE --- what you want is ONLY a tatooed younger guy of colour OR some older guy with a thick wallet that will spoil you so you can go out with the younger guy anyway
if you had the choice of someone with a brain and a personality OR some stupid as a post idiot with the looks of Adam Rodriquez --- the guy with the brains is NOT what you want !!!!
GUYS --- how many of you want to go clubbing where the average age is UNDER AGE !!!!!get a grip ---
I didn't like 18 yr olds when i was 18 ---
nothing more sensual than a 50ish women --- but they do not want us "older guys "
best guys in Florida are waiting to tee off at 7:45 in the morning --- not waiting in line at some club at midnight
I am NOT a great looking guy --- and I am very glad I am not --- bye -- going fishing | |
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vivi63
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Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 31 | |
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Posted: 11/16/2006 10:24:51 AM | I am different on that but yes, I agree with you, women want the guy who is going
to treat them like crap!! | |
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vivi63
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Joined: 11/2/2006
Msg: 32 | |
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Posted: 11/16/2006 10:29:53 AM | Yes men are the same, the 40 something don't want me, they want 25 to 35, provocative clothes, belly rings, tats......basically something with a lot of issues, drinking, partying, and wonder why they can't find a good woman!  | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 5:34:05 AM | Sounds like a lot of folks of both genders proclaim to want a nice, normal person...but have a hard time developing 'chemistry' w/ one when they meet.
So...if you have changed in your mind as to what you need in a partner, how do you get your 'heart' and other body parts to follow suit? | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 6:11:03 AM | I admit it. I am shallow abit. I want the women to be cute at the least..then its time to find chemistry..
I IM pretty women..and they are not responsive to me...and vice versa...
But patience is the key..there is a woman out there who doesnt trade her looks for currency..
The sad thing....some of us frogs are great people once you get to know us....
still lookin..... | |
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TraeC
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Joined: 10/31/2006
Msg: 35 | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 8:18:31 AM |
The sad thing....some of us frogs are great people once you get to know us....
still lookin.....
tradeblazer, the same can be said for us non-barbie dolls too, some of us are great people once you get to know us. so maybe if you tried IM'ing someone else you might find them to be absolutely gorgeous once you get to know them. I've dated some guys I wasn't physically attracted to at first, but once I got to know them better I thought they were drop dead gorgeous and no one could tell me different! | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 9:27:55 AM | true true....but we are who we are. I can see goodness in some women, but not attraction.
Yet i still want some attraction....something...i would give in to soft eyes that dont came in a great body......
I am just a dreamer, in search of a dream..
But every day brings a world of possibilities..Carpe diem.....
Hopefully in a relationship by end of dec...Santa you listening? | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 9:31:13 AM | | amen i agree with you i feel you will never know a person until you give them the time to prove they are not worth getting to know. | |
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Posted: 11/17/2006 12:47:55 PM | I think men and women have become shallow and superficial.
We are constantly bombarded by the media (Movies, Magazines, TV esp. Celebrity shows, Music Videos, Magazines, etc...)
They all want what they see in this virtual world that truly does NOT exist.
They have unrealistic expectations, of what they want in a mate, and they have been told NOT to settle for anything less.
They are worried about what their friends will say if they date this person or that person.
They want to impress their friends, and want their friends to be envious and jealous of the hot number they are dating.
Women want a trophy boy, and men want a trophy girl.
This is all true, you know it people. and it is very sad.
Most people are never content with what is in front of them.
They are trained from a very early age to never be satisfied with anything.
Just look at all the Media around you, really look at it from a marketing perspective and you will see what I mean.
Lets be Americas Top Model, Dance with stars, go the Grammys, the emmys, etc....
Its not real, but it has become real in their minds.
The unatainable has become the expectaions of the masses.
L. | |
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Posted: 11/18/2006 8:22:31 AM | wrong buddy !!!!
professional guys want someone that is more a human being than a trophy
LISTEN UP !!!--- that piece of garbage Mark Foley --- went to a lot of parties in the Miami area and he ALWAYS had this piece of arm candy with him --- 20 minutes later he was trying to pick up all the young boys that were hired to serve the guests and the "thing " had to be on her own
REAL men --- take their dates and ARE their dates
I am not interested in trophies -- already got lots of medals and such
I AM INTERESTED in someone that can actually carry on a conversation that does not include my bank statement , people I know , or THEIR past conquests ( or MINE !!!)
Today it is becoming increasingly hard to actually find someone that is just interested in being REALLY happy | |
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Posted: 11/18/2006 8:33:38 AM | easy to find us --- get in a boat ( ALL THE GIRLS ON HERE SAY THEY LOVE THE OUTDOORS !!!!!!!) and you'll find some of them on the South Myaakaa lake -- fishing
or you will find them at 7:30 am -- getting ready to get some exercise -- by walking 5 miles while playing golf --- or if you can't do that --- try the clubhouse restaurant around noon and join them for a cheeseburger ,fries and a beer
Look for the guy that stands a little away from you in the Publix store lineup because he does not want to encroach on your space
look for the guy that is always around but is never AROUND -- the ghost -- the guy that you thought was so UNCOOL in days past -- he is now the guy you realize that you hurt beyond repair
just stop looking and just LOOK --- understand !!!!
nice guys ---- we are everywhere | |
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Posted: 11/18/2006 2:50:33 PM | I never get involved with these chats but accidently came across your thoughts on "looks" as I was searching through some of the topics. You express yourself very well and seem to be in touch with your heart. I met someone in cyberland about 4 or 5 years ago that reminds me of you. If he could have opened up the way you do, things might have been a lot different for us today. But he always shut down as I have found most men do. I have only seen him about 2 hours in person during this entire period but yet he kept in touch with me, talked about loving me the entire time but yet sex was the only thing he wanted to talk about. I could not return the "I love you" because I just don't feel one can know they love someone unless they get to know that person as "in person", spending time together. He could never understand this no matter how hard I tried to convince him. I wanted a chance to know him but was never given that chance . I learned later that he thinks as you do. I'm not sure if that is a cop out or not. But I do know that the guys that stand a little distant in Publix or feel they have been bruised so hurtfully, they should take a look at themselves in a mirror and take responsibility somewhere along the line for their own actions instead of whining about the imperfections of someone else. No one is perfect and none of us are alike no matter if your male or female. I am a person that is looking for real happiness, I am a person that looks beyond the surface, I am a person that knows money is only a necessity, not a means for happiness. But I do require respect and to be treated with integrity. Perhaps I am wrong in my thoughts but the only difference is, I am willing to look at myself in the mirror and make adjustments when I need to. Sorry, didn't mean to go on and on. Just thought your comments were interesting and wanted to share mine. No reflections on you.
Just know, you guys that are afraid to "encroach a lady's space", it is your loss. Some of us are very deserving and would appreciate a kind hearted man in our lives. | |
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Posted: 11/29/2006 1:55:30 PM | Jim
Don't say you're not a good lookin guy....I think you're very handsome!!!!
ME | |
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Posted: 11/29/2006 2:40:24 PM | looks are important, i feel like you should be physically attracted to a person...but i've turned down very hot guys who i simply had nothing in common with or who approached me in a way that turned me completely off...
money is important...i make enough to support myself, not myself and a man, so he should be self sufficient....does he need to be rich...no...money doesn't buy happiness...but many men are intimidated by a woman who makes more than them...so the guy should have equal pay or more than me...so as to prevent that sort of thing...
but as far as wanting a bad boy...hell no...yeah i do end up with a few because part of being bad is dishonesty and lies...and they can con even the best of us...but it's not by choice and i will quickly throw them to the curb....i love nice guys....even shy guys (since i'm shy)...confidence is great, but some mistake arrogance for confidence and if you think u are all that and proudly annouce it, i'm gonna run in the opposite direction...i am a very humble and honest person...and don't need the drama in my life... | |
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Posted: 12/2/2006 6:12:21 PM | | Well, the last few women I've tried making contact with who actually showed enough class to provide a written response, did tell me flat out that they were not attracted to me, and therefore had no desire to talk any further. I'm going to say that looks seem to be of much more importance to women in general than they let on (because they don't want to be thought of as superficial), but the rest of the package has to be good enough for them, as well. Financial security, mental stability, criminal history, divorce record and children from past relationships are other important factors that I know I consider when getting to know someone. It only makes sense that the ladies would search for those things, also. But, when it comes to looks, I definitely can look past what might be considered average to less than average looks, IF the rest of her personality traits are in line with what I am open to. | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 7:00:20 AM | | I've read through all these messages and it's quite sad how people think. I really don't think you can feel 'chemistry' from a picture. And if you are going to rule people out based on that you might miss meeting a great friend. I'm not looking for arm candy - just someone who shares my interests and can carry on a conversation. And I'm not 'looking for love' because love just happens. You can't force it. But you can still make friends and take whatever fate delivers. I happen to be passionate about riding my motorcycle and I'm sure there are a lot of great guys out there who don't - but I would like to meet someone else who rides. That's the one common interest I'd like to share. Then...who knows. | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 7:06:11 AM | | I can only speak for myself but I don't want a younger tattooed guy, Yuck. What I'd like to find is a guy who has some boldness, some intelligence, a sense of humor and is a bit of a rascal, in a good way. The looks thing can go both ways you know. I went to a POF dance last night in Jax. Thought I looked very attractive in my red/black polka dotted dress, but no one asked me to dance or anything. Was sitting by myself. Smiled, sat up straight but somehow I intimidate men. Not sure why. Sometimes it's not the looks but the air with which you convey yourself that people see. Not sure what air I'm giving off but willing to take responsibility for it. | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 9:37:33 AM | florida dad, just have to say...you look great with your new hair cut...a big and positive change...i kept wanting to give you advice on this but was afraid you would take it the wrong way....I see a lot of men our age who just don't have it together in the ways of grooming themselves and dressing themselves for the 21st century...they seem stuck in the 80's with hairstyles and clothing...sometimes i want to be like Hitch and given them some advice....there are so many shows out there on television right now which take men and women stuck in a style rut and update their look..and without plastic surgery they can take ten years off of a person....
I dated a guy last year (the alcoholic) and when i met him, he allowed me to take him to the mall and help him pick out new clothes...he bragged about it to his parents, since his ex wife had only cared about herself and buying herself new things, he'd not had new clothes in awhile and didn't know what would look good on him...I like doing this sort of thing, maybe I should become a professional stylist...
as for the biker guy...see now that would be something that would make me not respond...i'm not into bikes...and would not be compatible with someone in that lifestyle, i have friends and family who are, and it's just not my scene....I don't think women are judging just by the photo but are actually reading the profile and looking at the photo and sizing that guy up as a potential mate...unfortunately men tend to look at the pretty face, without reading the profile, hence the majority of responses i get to my profile are from guys who are complete opposite of what i ask for
then there is the fact that the majority of men on here are just looking to hook up for sex...given that fact, maybe, just maybe the women are figuring, well if that is true, i'll get the hottest guy possible before i respond...hehe...i used to have a rule when i went dancing, if i wouldn't sleep with him, i won't dance with him, since that is what men are wanting anyways...i've had men actually shocked that i wouldn't go home with them after i danced with them...so now i rarely dance with anyone at all...saves me from a lot of drama
i could show you the guys i've met from this site...they are all varying ages, and each looks completely different, tall, short, thin, chunky, nerdy, manly, pretty boy....it wasn't just looks that made me want to meet them...it was something they wrote, then an online conversation that went well, a phone conversation that also went well, that lead me to meet them | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 10:37:39 AM | dancer...I wasn't stuck in the eighties, nor am I not well groomed, even with longer hair. I actually LIKE my hair longer, but the older I get, the finer my hair gets. It was impossible to make it look the way I wanted to, so I gave up and just cut it. I also got rid of the goatee I was wearing for a few months. You weren't the only person to tell me how much better I look, now though. I am actually a well groomed, nice dressing guy all the time. I even smell good (BONUS). I guess I will thank you for noticing, so thank you. I'll send you some new pictures of me in six months, after I've shaped up too, since I've starting lifting weights, again. Gonna put some muscle back on this frame.  | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 11:44:56 AM | I don't think women WANT a man who is "self-absorbed and shallow, simply because he is "hot"." I think they settle for them because its better than having a lifeless excuse for a man who can pay the bills.
I believe serious women and men want someone sexy-for the short term to tweak their emotions and STABLE-for the long term, unless you're planning on an early death.
You only settle for less when you dont believe in yourself.
And while LOOKS are not all important, they are a huge part of being with a person. But they are something that can be changed TOO. I have noticed that women who aren't VERY GOOD LOOKING in a super model fashion, who take care of their bodies(i.e. eat well, exercise, sleep, wash face, clean clothes) are still PRETTY DAMN GOOD LOOKING.*nods head* While they are all simple things... everbody slacks sometimes. I just know when I am keeping up with all of these things regularly I FEEL GREAT, and i dont care whether I have a girlfriend or not.
Once you start, its hard to stop. You take care of yourself...You look and feel better... this increases your confidence... other people notice and are attracted to you... and so you continue to care for yourself.
But in the end, none of us are perfect NOW(although we've probably met some who believe otherwise- *raises one eyebrow*- I try ignore those people). You've got to be able to be able to either change what the opposite sex wants and continue to change yourself for the better. Maybe more importantly you have to BELIEVE that you are the best that is out there and communicate that to people through your body language and speaking. | |
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Posted: 12/3/2006 12:04:14 PM | florida dad...u take a compliment and then turn around a generalization I was making about other men and acted like I put it on you...it's not that hard to look around this site and see a lot of these men (and women too) need help with making themselves look the best they can be...in fact, being so fashion concious, I can spot old photos from men and women, i notice old style clothes and hair quickly...unless like i said they are just stuck in that time zone
and chilled out, I agree, people don't have to be drop dead gorgeous but if they dress nice and take care of themselves it does make them a stand out in other ways...even something simple...for instance...a lot of men wear white sneakers with EVERY outfit they have...they will go to a club and be dressed haflway decent, then have white gym shoes on their feet, women notice little things like this...since i started getting manicures and pedicures a few years back i notice men have complimented me on my nails...they notice little things too...
go into my bathroom and you'll see i own about ten different scents of bathwash and lotions...men think it's nuts to have so much , but they certainly compliment me on the way i smell | |
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