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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 12:14:18 PM | If I could change the drift a little here...I would really appreciate some input on something..
Before,if I got an email from someone that I wasn't interested in,I simply didn't answer...after hearing opinions on that,I've become pretty much sorta convinced that it's the proper,courteous thing to do to reply with a polite "thanks,but no thanks"...I have no problem with "sorry,you're too far away","sorry,you're too young/old","sorry,I don't get along too well with bleeding hearts/neocons/born agains etc"...but...I haven't yet figured out a diplomatic,non hurtful way to say "I'm sorry,but I'm not interested in (fill in physical reason here) ladies"...I'm not out to make anyone feel bad and although I agree,a lie is a lie is a lie,is a "little white lie" said ONLY TO TRY TO KEEP FROM HURTING SOMEONE'S FEELINGS really that wrong??...if so,then what would be the nicest way to say no thanks truthfully,but as painlessly as possible,to someone you don't find physically attractive??? | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 12:30:36 PM | Alive: Finally something I do know about. Woo hoo!!! I'm on another site and it has ice-breakers. Cheezy little one liners that introduce someone. There is also a flip side to those: polite "not interested" ice-breakers. For instance: "Thank you for the ice-breaker, however I feel there is too drastic of an age difference." "I am taking a break from dating at the present time." "You seem nice, but the chemistry definitely isn't there." Etc. Here on POF we don't have the luxury to send a "canned" reply, but ~ I do reply to every single email. Most often than not, I thank them for taking the time to write. And depending on the person, I actually honestly say what I mean. One yesterday was basically: "Thank you for your response. And thank you for the very kind compliments. I am not currently dating but I wish you the best while you are on POF." It sounds cheesy here, but I get so many thank-yous for responding back. I just think it's the right thing to do. And, I've made some very unique interesting and unexpected friends just by being nice. I figure if he takes the time to write to me, I owe him the same courtesy. Now, there has been a time or two when I've had to be more blunt (they refuse to understand that I am not dating) but those times are very rare. Everyone has their own way to do things ~ but no one likes being completely ignored. That is just simply not necessary. I don't believe anyone is too busy to take 30 seconds to type a nice "thanks, but no thanks." (If you really feel awkward, just indicate you'd be available for email friendship but nothing else ~ many times, you'll never hear another word.) This is just my advice, I'm sure others have a different view ~ I don't like being avoided/ignored and I would assume others feel the same way. Hell ~ you never know, someone may really need to get an email that day....sometimes that means a lot to people (including me!!)  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 4:58:27 PM | | guilty, as charged. Yet I feel cheated. I ride a motorcycle, well. I am in excellant phsical condition. I can dance, I have a good lobido, even if I can't spell worth a damn. Yet The replys get very thin, Meet me then decide. or at least talk to me. Hell you might even learn something. OK that feels better | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 5:30:20 PM | You are right its time to call it quits here in this forum. Regardless of what you say or why you are here I wish you all the best.
~Raylene~ | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 5:49:44 PM | | The truth of the matter here is that I did go out with a man who said he was 50 well as the night grew old and he began to tire quite a bit he made the remark "this has been a long night for a 62 year old man" it was barely 9 pm so there we have it his true age comes through. I did not get upset because I asked him why he did it and his reply was he did not feel women his own age would respond. He apologized and asked me if I was mad and I was not. He wanted to see me again and I told him I would need to think about it. I have decided i don`t care who lies and who does not and it will only make a difference if they get caught...lmao...however 62 is a a bit too high of a number for me to date...lol...so hey have fun because life is too short. I will also add that a few men I have corresponded with have not been totally honest about age a few other important issues but thats a whole new story and one I will keep to myself. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 5:59:03 PM | Raylene there in your last post is the very reason men might feel the need to lie about there age. As it reads everything was fine until you found out his real age then it was put on the breaks.
however 62 is a a bit too high of a number for me to date. It wasn't a problem until you knew the truth. Bet you wouldn't of gave him the time of day if you knew before going out with him. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 6:05:11 PM | | To paraphrase a song from Shari Lewis and her show with Lamb Chop and Hushpuppie: "This is the thread that never ends, it just goes on and on my friends, some people starting posting to it one day just because and they[we] continue posting forever just because this is the thread that never ends.................." | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/11/2006 7:53:38 PM |
Kerry: Since you seem to know a little about philosophy (or at least you know one quote) I'll post this question to you. It was the basis for my final term paper in a grad level Philosophy/Ethics course: If someone lies to you ~ are they hurting you or themself?
In the works of Eco, a predominant concept is the concept of posttextual mnemic causation. The premise of Baudrillardist hyperreality states that the establishment is a legal fiction. However, the main theme of Werther’s model of the precapitalist paradigm of narrative is the common ground between society and Kantian ethics.
If one examines neodialectic cultural theory, one is faced with a choice: either reject neodeconstructive discourse or conclude that art may be used to reinforce the status quo. Derrida promotes the use of the precapitalist paradigm of narrative to deconstruct sexism. But Marx uses the term ‘Debordist situation’ to denote the absurdity, and therefore the rubicon, of cultural society.
The characteristic theme of the works of Eco is not situationism as such, but postsituationism. Capitalist postdialectic theory suggests that the purpose of the observer is significant form. In a sense, the subject is interpolated into a neodialectic cultural theory that includes reality as a totality.
Derrida suggests the use of the precapitalist paradigm of narrative to modify and read sexuality. It could be said that in The Limits of Interpretation (Advances in Semiotics), Eco deconstructs the predialectic paradigm of reality; in The Island of the Day Before he denies neodialectic cultural theory.
Any number of discourses concerning Sontagist camp may be found. Therefore, if the precapitalist paradigm of narrative holds, we have to choose between capitalist postdialectic theory and constructivist nihilism.
The example of Marxist capitalism depicted in Eco’s The Aesthetics of Thomas Aquinas emerges again in The Name of the Rose. But Sartre’s analysis of the precapitalist paradigm of narrative holds that culture serves to exploit minorities, but only if art is equal to language; otherwise, discourse must come from communication.
McElwaine implies that we have to choose between neodialectic cultural theory and postconceptual dematerialism. However, if textual objectivism holds, the works of Eco are empowering.
-Kerry O. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/12/2006 5:51:14 PM | bluesky: you didn't understand a word of it, because it said nothing. Basically he pulled an "Ask Jeeves" copied and pasted. I can assure you ~ that rhetoric said about as much as Bush says in his weekly radio State of the Union. (Whatever someone else wrote, he reads....likewise Kerry copied, pasted and posted.)
~OT~ There is no right or wrong answer. So even google or Jeeves can't appropriately answer that question. I thought you'd be at least bright enough to say "There is no true answer." What is that old adage: It's best to remain silent than to speak and remove all doubt?"   | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/12/2006 6:12:08 PM | Right on deacon I like your (theiory),probably not spelled right but who the hell cares? I am a women of 58 years old and I don't look it, I feel a lot younger than my age infact most people think I can't be over 45 even my closest friends don't believe it when I tell them my age. As far as younger women dating older men, I say go for it if you can find a sugar daddy that don't know the difference between love and a gold digger he deserves to get burnt. puffthemagicdragon  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/12/2006 6:31:07 PM | Wow...........that was harsh........possibly ture,but horribly harsh, that at fifty we are in a new category in society that is not valued or easily accepted.................wow!! Ok, I don't lie about my age........why bother.........who am I fooling? And the part about it not being easily accepted...no I don't accept my age well...but its not that bad. Fifty isn't what fifty was even when my mom was fifty...........ok, I know its because I am there...but women that are fifty are not wearing moo-moo's and orthopedic shoes yet..............ok, I am collecting cats so I can more easily accept this un-valued place in society. I will the be scarey old crazy cat woman every neighborhood needs. There...an old lady with a purpose...does that give me some value? I am just kidding....but it was harsh to see in print from someone its sneaking up on....I am used to it from people 30 and under, but wow!!!
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/12/2006 11:08:21 PM |
bluesky: you didn't understand a word of it, because it said nothing. Basically he pulled an "Ask Jeeves" copied and pasted. I can assure you ~ that rhetoric said about as much as Bush says in his weekly radio State of the Union. (Whatever someone else wrote, he reads....likewise Kerry copied, pasted and posted.)
~OT~ There is no right or wrong answer. So even google or Jeeves can't appropriately answer that question. I thought you'd be at least bright enough to say "There is no true answer." What is that old adage: It's best to remain silent than to speak and remove all doubt?"
No, the Evil Kerry did the same thing some profs in the Engineering Department of famous saltwater school did to an arrogant Humanities department a few years ago: the Evil Kerry had this hypothesis that Greeneyez was likely just trying to goad the Evil Kerry into responding so she could prove how much smarter she was than he, so the Evil Kerry used an AI program (Google "postmodernism generator" and see for yourself, readers) to generate complete gobbledy-gook. They, as did I, hypothesized that the folks baiting them would not be able to tell the the difference between computer-generated nonsense and the 'real thing' (I use that term rather loosely, since, apparently, even a graduate student who wrote a thesis in the field couldn't spot this as being the proverbial empty suit) . That they would fall all over themselves trying to tear it and the 'person' who wrote it apart, only because.... that's what they always do-- just tear other people down with whom they don't agree, often employing ad hominem attacks.
I leave it to the student to evaluate the results of this experiment. Draw your own conclusions-- show your work.
Note to Greeneyez: this is why I won't engage you in debate and have been ignoring your questions when I bother to read you at all. I think you're less interested in a Search for Truth and more interested in always being right. I find your reliance on ridicule as a debating tactic repugnant and I don't tolerate that in a leisure debating partner.
Oh, and this time you can't claim that "You started it." You were just spoiling for a fight with the Evil Kerry and you walked right into this one on your own.
-Kerry O. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/12/2006 11:21:55 PM | uhhhh.... Evil Kerry and Greeneyez... can we talk about the men reaching 50+ and not deal with you two fighting??? I must say however, that I can' stand to go into a thread where "someone" cuts and pastes whole BOOKS.. these forums I thought was supposed to be of peoples opinions and thoughts NOT pages out of books and dictionaries... what's up with that? When you start posting that crap the whole thread goes downhill!!! If you want to state an opinion.. or if you really want people to READ something from a book then give people a "site" to go on IF they really want to do that. I'm more into the personal approach than the school stuff. If I wanted to go to school then that is what I'd do. Some people make the forums their own class room. It really takes the fun out of the threads. Now THAT is my .02 worth. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/13/2006 1:56:56 PM | do any men 70 or older wanna date a younger lady ..lol,that would be me . I've gotta be young enough for somebody!!!! ...LOL | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/13/2006 4:11:56 PM | mesnafugal - I could not agree with you more - this thread should have died a natural death long ago but we keep getting back in our face  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/13/2006 4:57:25 PM |
mesnafugal - I could not agree with you more - this thread should have died a natural death long ago but we keep getting back in our face
Horselady,
In the short time this forum has been around, you've started at least 25 threads. Maybe it's just me, but who are you to complain about one person's privileges to post what they think? Sheesh, one can't swing a dead lie about one's age without hitting one _your_ threads!
-The Evil Kerry | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/13/2006 7:01:55 PM |
Men reaching age 50 + Posted: 6/13/2006 5  56 PM mesnafugal - I could not agree with you more - this thread should have died a natural death long ago but we keep getting back in our face
Hmmm ~ Maybe this is just my way of doing it, but if I weren't interested in the contents of a thread I wouldn't click the mouse and routinely go in. If someone isn't finding what they look for in a particular thread, there are tons of other ones to venture in and out of. Just my opinion ~
Kerry: My answer here will be exactly as it was in the last thread in which you chose to trash me personally ~ I don't give a damn about being right, because it isn't all that common of an occurance in my life. You did, do me courtesy of admitting to these posters that your post said nothing, which is what I said, in case you missed that. As for you and I fighting ~ no chance. Each party has to have a valid interest in what the other person is stating in order to debate. I think it's fairly safe to assume, I don't give a damn what you say/think and you don't give a damn what I say/think. The glory of agreeing to disagree.
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/13/2006 8:49:03 PM | Shoot me if I'm wrong but STARTING THREADS... isn't that what the forums are for??? If people didn't start threads then we wouldn't have much to do on here now would we?? And I have not understood WHY people go on threads that they do not like. That mouse is controlled by your hand.. nobody elses!!! YES there comes a time for people to agree to disagree but then some people obviously just like to stir things up and argue... wish I had that much time on my hands!!
NOW.. about these delicious older men... I just can't get enough of them... now where were we??? | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/14/2006 2:34:24 AM |
Kerry: My answer here will be exactly as it was in the last thread in which you chose to trash me personally ~ I don't give a damn about being right, because it isn't all that common of an occurance in my life. You did, do me courtesy of admitting to these posters that your post said nothing, which is what I said, in case you missed that. As for you and I fighting ~ no chance. Each party has to have a valid interest in what the other person is stating in order to debate. I think it's fairly safe to assume, I don't give a damn what you say/think and you don't give a damn what I say/think. The glory of agreeing to disagree.
Aww darn, it looks as if my career as an Ayn Rand villain is at an end. :)
And yes, m' dear, I sometimes leave teeth marks when arguing, but let it not be said that you don't give as good as you get. But I doubt, in your heart of hearts, you'd prefer monoculture apathy or frontier justice to this messy affair often known as free and open debate.
-Kerry O. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/14/2006 6:59:23 AM |
I would probably giggle, politely tell you I am not datable and then get your permission to send your profiles to my two Aunts here on POF.
This begs the question: what did your aunties do to you to deserve this? 
Thanks, though. It's a sweet offer but I may not quite be ready for the Shidduch yet. 
Houston, that's a go on the fork... | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/14/2006 10:36:17 AM | It seems to me there is some sort of stigma attached to "50", it's like the ultimate over the hill age or something. I'm 51 and when I turned 50 it wasn't as wierd as turning 40, I was amazed that I actually made it to 50!! But I noticed also that when I put my age as 51, I didn't get but maybe one or two responses. So for the heck of it (wasn't getting any mail anyway) I changed my age to 46 (yep I was bored) and lo and behold, my email perked right up!! Had the same picture, same profile etc etc, only difference was the age. But, alas, I couldn't represent myself as being younger (in years) than I actually am, so I'm back to no emails again.... | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 6/14/2006 1:10:34 PM | It seems to me there is some sort of stigma attached to "50", it's like the ultimate over the hill age or something. I'm 51 and when I turned 50 it wasn't as weird as turning 40, I was amazed that I actually made it to 50!! But I noticed also that when I put my age as 51, I didn't get but maybe one or two responses. So for the heck of it (wasn't getting any mail anyway) I changed my age to 46 (yep I was bored) and lo and behold, my email perked right up!! Had the same picture, same profile etc etc, only difference was the age. But, alas, I couldn't represent myself as being younger (in years) than I actually am, so I'm back to no emails again....
Now that speaks volumes. (I think you have just explained why men may want to lie about their age) But I do remember the day that you didn't ask a lady her age and if you did they where always 29 yrs. old. | |
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