| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/27/2006 9:23:02 PM | __My profile state that I am 52 and I am proud of it. I am dating a lady who is a few older and does not show it at all. Her daughter tells her that she, and I, are behaving like teenagers in love. Well, we are young at heart.
__Age has not meaning to us.
Doc  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/27/2006 9:47:09 PM | Mostly I have discovered that the lies are more about weight and height ... since I'm almost 57 and have a lot of energy, I tend to avoid men who are older ... it's just been my experience that they just don't have the energy or the desire to keep up with me. I have found a few over 60 who will lie to me about that because they think I'll be impressed that they don't look their age ... I'm not. It's about energy, not age. There are men out there who are older than me who could probably run circles around me, but they don't seem to be interested in me so they are not a consideration.
Anyways, I mentioned all the stuff about the lies to some of my co-workers a few months back and they didn't seem to think the lies about height and weight in general were so bad ... they actually thought it was awful that I was so concerned about the fact that a guy could shrink 4 inches from the time you got off the phone with them until 1 hour later when you met them at the restaurant.
As I pointed out to them and will say here ... if anyone (men or women) will lie about something as obvious as weight and height, what are they lying about that isn't so obvious? That would be my biggest concern.
I do not lie about anything ... I'm too lazy. I'm too lazy to keep track of all the original lies and the subsequent lies one has to tell in order to cover up the original lie. That just makes my brain tired and I don't need it.
I'd rather just be honest about everything and deal with the way people respond to my honesty. It's quicker and less painful than having to drag things out with them discovering that I've lied and the process of having to reveal each little lie that's been told. But not everyone sees it that way and so they lie.
I think it's just part of human nature and it's rare to find someone who doesn't tell a lie from time to time for whatever reason. Everyone has their own comfort zone about how much dishonesty they can tolerate. Set your limits and stick by them.
I might point out that although it appears you have met a lot of liars along the way ... I feel certain there are just as many you are bound to meet who do not lie. Obviously, those would be the ones you should consider as the "keepers".
Good luck ...  | |
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99c
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Joined: 3/24/2006
Msg: 28 | |
| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/27/2006 10:17:09 PM | | They shrink by the time they meet you because gravity is much less on their planet, where they called you from, where they were 4 inches taller. I have no explanation for other incorrect measurments. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/27/2006 10:48:12 PM | ^^^You're probably right ... that gravitational pull towards "earth" (the one that plants their two feet firmly on the ground) was just too much and it caused their spine to compress and as a result they got 4 inches shorter ... yea that's it.
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 2:41:19 AM | Well, one must wonder if the only shrinkage is in their given height! For myself, I have actually shrunk a little, I'm down to 6'3" from 6'4" - kinda scary really!
But getting back to the subject, I'm with Cotter - it's too much like hard work to lie, so toss the truth up front and let people wonder ^^ | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 4:00:38 AM | Yea ... losing a little height along the way is normal ... I've lost about 1/2 inch. For those telling such open faced lies (women do it a lot too) one really has to wonder if there was possibly some shrinkage of the brain ... what the heck are they thinking?
For me the other part of the story is: How do people want to establish any kind of a trusting relationship with someone when they start out with lies? For those of us who place so much value on honesty, it just undermines the whole process.
It's not worth it to start the lies to begin with ......... tell the truth and we won't have to bug anyone about lying while here in the forums   | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 4:35:06 AM | | wow,..this age thing gets tossed around a lot. i'm a firm believer, age, both men and women, is too hung up on the number. i am not so concerned with age,..more concerned with personality and attitude. i have met women who are 44 that act and feel older than me at 55. and yet,...have met women 49 who think they are going on 29, (nothing wrong with that...what ever floats your boat). what ever you personal choice is concerning age is, no one should complain or try to change your opinion and desires. that's your choice and we all are intitled to 'our choice'. if 'we' do not fit in the 'age range' of someone,..just move on...changing their mind will not happen. so,..as for me,..at 55,...i'm looking for a woman in the mid 40'ish,...thats how i feel and act. the group of friends i hang with and blend in with are in their late 30's and early 40's, (and most of them don't know my actualy age,...so don't tell them.) this 'age' thing will be tossed back and forth forever and it will only matter between 2 people and thats all that matters. now,..let's forget about this age thing and worry about something important. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 11:40:38 AM | ^^^ I agree in that we will all have our preferences ... comfort zone ... whatever one calls it. The point of the OT was that even though this lady listed her preferences (whatever her reason for it), it appears the guys just didn't take it seriously and then additionally lied about their age on top of it.
If she had said she prefers 60 year old men, then she would not expect a 45 year old man to contact her and try to pass himself off as a 60 year old. If she prefers a 30 year old, then she would not expect a 50 year old to contact her and try to pass himself off ........ you're getting the drift here .... right?
She has just been getting the "double whammy" so to speak. Not only are guys of inappropriate age contacting her (although she was specific about her desires), but they are also lying to her about it.
There are plenty to go around on here ... just be honest about it!  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 12:17:18 PM | | i agree....meeting men my own age is very difficult....younger want the older women but they really dont have what it takes ...just my thought...smiles....i like older men...i always have.....but where are they all...at 50 are they still working so hard they cant find time to have some fun? | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 12:51:05 PM | | verygreeneyez , you should read the "Three questions" topic . May help. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 2:28:38 PM | I am 54 and have no intention of putting a lower age ,I dont claim to look a lot younger either,I guess all this age thing is an Ego thing,me I got no ego I am what I am,
I always thought relationships were built on atraction love affection trust and loyalty not numbers,guess I was wrong
verygreeneyes you look your age ,be thankful ,there are those that look older than they actualy are, | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/28/2006 10:16:57 PM | Well cant speak for anyone else, but I am proud to be 16, na Iam 52 and been single for maybe 8 years now. I am disabled and can still make love like a 100 year old man. I worked hard and I feel I worked for every wrinkle, every ache, and past memories. Why people on the innernet lie, well god only knows, but we can guess. I just feel if your a person that cant take the truth then you should not ask the question. At 52 I still love romantic incounters with a special person and no, I dont own a black book. I still believe in being a gentalman and treating a lady like one. Age has no barring with me as I believe that hearts that can will and nothing will stop that. If someone lies about thier age what else or when will it stop. No, I dont believe that I will get cought in a lie, I never lie. Well got to go now, time to be recharged! Hugs
Vic | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 3:58:08 AM | | I haven't dated since my divorce five years ago but I would prefer to keep the man's age five years younger or older than my age, which is 53. I'm thinking that a gap of more than that could be uncomfortable in many areas. I saw, on another thread, that "Your age divided by 2, plus 7 = minimum 'socially acceptable' age you can date." That would mean I could date a man 34 years old? Heck, my son is 30 - I think not! | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 4:32:59 AM | | wow,..'pretty woman',..i have never heard that 'age equation' for social acceptance before. let's figure this out,...i'm 55,..almost 56,..divided by 2 =28..+7..= 35. uhmm...is my math right? 35....ohhhh...i don't think that's gonna work. like you,...i think i'll stay with a tad bit older. more like at least 36......lol | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 5:58:22 AM | | Age is a relative thing - I have found that the men I've dated who are younger than 45 are not attentive I like my men around 53 - they're doing well in their careers, the children are grown, their over the hurt of whatever landed them single (usually a divorce) and they are ready to show a lady a good time. That's been my experience. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 6:53:46 AM | Msg 15---- Your step-dad's war was Viet Nam,,, The "conflict" in Korea began in June '50 and a cease fire was declared in July '53,,, about the time your step-dad was born. Off topic,, sorry....
Why do men lie about age? Why do they lie about anything? So we will see them in a more kindly light? Because they are still chasing younger women and want more chances at finding one? It's just stupid! If they lie about age,,, what else is not the truth about? I can deal better with your worst truth, than I can with your smallest lie. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 7:15:24 AM | | Very green in many ways you are right...I'm 56 now and to be honest have no desire to bungy jump, hike up a mountain etc.etc....but lying about it is just plain stupid..hell I'm amazed I lasted this long so have a decided tendency to be proud of it. Life changes as we age ...and whether it changes for the better or the worse is a choice we all have to make.That being said ,to come to a sight like this and lie about anything seems just silly to me, supposedly we are all here in the hopes of meeting someone, so if I say I'm something I'm not, doubt very much that my purpose in being here will come to a good end....lol! I will however send you an invite to my 32nd annual 25th birthday party in July. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 7:21:19 AM | | Quick follow up....met a woman recently for coffee from this fine sight....her pic had to have been taken 25 years and 80 lbs ago...am perplexed...are these people just looking for a string of first dates? Now theres a horrifying thought. | |
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Ava111
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Joined: 4/10/2005
Msg: 44 | |
| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 9:23:17 AM | I couldn't help noticing once I was over 35, I got far less emails.....you fall off many people's critiera's lists....Oh well, it's part of life. What can you do, their loss!!!  | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 10:12:05 AM | Ava.....
Is that not a shame that someone could eliminate you, without knowing you, for being "one day older" then you were yesterday?
I have said and will continue to say......that age is a number not the "end all" for dating.
I find it amazing now that women would think that men are so bad for trying to make themselves look as young and positive as they can. For years it was acceptable for women to "lie" about their age and very offensive if a man even dared ask her age. Women have been accepted for coloring their hair, wearing many types of clothing that make them look better then they really are, getting shots and operations to be younger.
Society did all of this to women and forced many of them down that road because "youth" was the answer for everything sexual, sensual, and competitive. Men are now in the same situation many times, and now are coloring the hair, getting shots for wrinkles, operations for additions and fat reduction, just like many women.
Many of us know that "youth" is not the real answer now, and as we age, we are better then ever in many ways. Getting older does not mean being old, it just means doing more to maintain what you have and want out of life.
I do not think most would even think poorly of stating their age, if it really did not matter and we were judged more on how we looked, acted, performed, and handled life in general with those around us. I can be with those in their 20's and have a good time as well as those in their 50's and 60's.......it is not the age, but the maturity and ability to keep my interest and attraction that really counts......and that should go both ways.
Just my opinion..... | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 7:07:41 PM | | I am 50 and would never lie about my age,and 51 is just around the corner(yikes). I don't understand why people lie about their age as well as put pics in their profiles that are 20 yrs old too.Honesty I will always believe is the best policy. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 7:20:15 PM | People lie to make themselves look good to themselves ...and no one else
when people ask me my age I tell them 51 ... 49 more to go.... I am having a ball ...I see too many 20-35 year old people worrying about getting old... They make themselves old. They forgot how to laugh and have fun ..they are too serious I love my lines they show that I've lived | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/29/2006 9:08:06 PM | @deacon ...
Is that not a shame that someone could eliminate you, without knowing you, for being "one day older" then you were yesterday?
I have said and will continue to say......that age is a number not the "end all" for dating.
I find it amazing now that women would think that men are so bad for trying to make themselves look as young and positive as they can. I was thinking the OP was not only upset because the men lied, but because she had been specific about the age factor. You all need to get the picture here ... It's a preference ... men never seem to shy away from naming their preferences ... big or small breasts, blonde or red hair, Asian or Caucasian ... why is it so wrong for the lady to have a preference regarding age?
Some women place age boundaries at the top because no matter what, they might still want a child. If a 30 year old lady had a child with a 65 year old "young-acting energetic" man, what are the chances that man would see his child graduate from college? Maybe that's why some have put age boundaries. The same goes for men ... maybe a 55 year old man still wants a child. Try that with a 55 year old lady ... good luck! So of course, he would have an age limit in his profile. Should we chastise him because of it? Should we chastise anyone for stating their preferences or just respect them and be honest?
I really don't want to put age limits on my profile, but to be honest with you, I have just barely started my career and I will be 57 in a few days ... men my age are looking for a lady to retire with. Well there is no way I can retire nor do I desire to retire anytime soon. I don't have a choice but to find a man who can either accept that and deal with it, or perhaps find a younger man who is also not "ready to retire".
You see ... it's not just about looks and how a person acts or anything all that devious ... it's about preferences and situations too! Why are people (men and women alike) judged because of that?
Why can't we just respect the preferences listed in the profile ... if there is a list ... and be honest? Why is that asking too much?
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/31/2006 7:04:40 AM | v.g.eyes..... had to laugh....the magic age for women on the dating sites is....47......a WHOLE
LOT of women are .....47!...........one even says in her (about me) part that"O.K. so i lied..I'm 51.... i think a fair formula for the liars about their age is about four years shaved off...like that makes a difference!.......anyway, i think you are mighty fine ............. | |
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| Men reaching age 50 +
Posted: 3/31/2006 7:46:50 AM | Men lie about their age because usually women age faster than men as far as their body shape, etc...
many males on here *I'm not saying all males generally* can pass for younger... AND there's women who can pass for younger as well. THEY also lie about their ages... I've met several.
If you'll notice, most women on POF have age limits here and if the male's profile says he's over a certain age, he can't email her. that may have something to do with it.
Also, a guy figures if he gets his foot inside the door with an attractive woman, she may change her mind about the age problem.
I'm not doing it now, but I've done it in the past... but didn't really need to.
She'll find out eventually guys, usually before you get to the good stuff. If you want to frustrate yourselves, go ahead....but it usually doesn't work and even if it does: not for long. | |
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