| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 3/31/2006 11:12:57 PM | What is success anyway? Money? I know people that make lots of money, yet they're miserable. Look at Hollywood and how dysfunctional those types are.
I'll be honest. I AM intimidated by women who make more money than me and work in more prestigious professions. The reason being is that I see a woman like that and figure that she'd never want anything to do with a guy like me. It's not about having power over anyone. I'd have no problem dating a woman who made more money than me as long as I liked her. It's that they'd have a problem with me.
I've heard people say that women marry and date "up". They want to "submit" to someone. 
I think part of the reason for it is that these women grow up in upper-middle class households and can't relate to anyone who is of a lower class. Upward mobility is a lot tougher for people in the lower classes. The whole Horatio Alger thing is largely a myth. For every rags to riches story there are 10 people who fall through the cracks.
I mean, being a screw-up is one thing. I wouldn't blame anyone for not wanting to date a person who can't hold down a job or stay out if trouble. On the other hand, I do think a lot of people, men and women, are far too concerned with income and status. Being successful doesn't always equate with being a good lover/spouse/parent. I've also found that people who are primarily attracted to "successful" people usually end up unhappy in the long run. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 3/31/2006 11:18:26 PM | Absolutely!
I have degrees and a successful career and to me its not someone's success thats important. Its who they are and how they treat you thats important. I could care less how successful a man is or how much money he makes because the material things are not important. What matters is the measure of the man and how he wears his self-esteem. If he's all I ever wanted in man, what else matters?
My experience is that it has been the other way around. Men appear to avoid me when they find out that I am educated and successful. I was dating someone in the trades and he had the gall to tell me I should be dating someone professional!! The assumption is that because I have an education or am well read, I am not interested in anyone less successful or educated which is absolute nonsense!!! | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 3/31/2006 11:23:45 PM | | It doesn't matter to me what status someone is - so long as we connect. In my experience, it is men who often can't deal with someone higher up the career ladder. I had a 10 year relationship with someone and looking back, can pinpoint the time it started to go wrong to the time I got promoted and learnt to drive. In retrospect I can see that he felt 'unneccesary' but I didn't pick up on the signs till it was too late and he had started an affair with one of his juniors.. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:10:57 PM | I was married for 18 years to someone who had less education than me and made less money. I ended the relationship because he was too ambitious. Doesn't sound quite right, huh? He was in such a struggle to become a success in everyone elses eyes that he became a failure in mine. He lost sight of the important things in life in his pursiut to make lots of money and impress the world.
I am now in a relationship with someone who makes a little less than I do and again has less formal education but has the same ideas as I do of what is truely important in life and for that I think he is one of the most successful men I have ever known. He supports himself and his daughter and loves his life and the people who are important in it. What more do you really need? So, my answer is YES I would (and do) date someone who SOCIETY may see as less sucessful as I am, but not someone who I SEE as less sucessful as I am. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:54:21 PM | that was too bad. my sister-in-law and her husband separated because of money also. makes no sense to me. i would welcome a woman making more money than me. hell i'd even cook and clean if that was the case. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/3/2006 2:56:15 PM | to Kerrymh
You would not date man that is not your equal.
And the reverse is so true. Consider this when you email men who are fit. They are also looking for their equal. | |
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kmhstx
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Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 134 | |
| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/3/2006 3:24:10 PM | | ^^^ I am sincerely confused. I do not remember emailing you Don222(btw you have prefer not to say for body type, and I would assume that most with this are over weight). I have emailed a few men in my local area who may or may not have been fit, because they did not specify in their profile a body type of their ideal mate. Now if I didn't receive a reply I assumed that they were not interested, and did not persue it any further. I personally do not only seek men who are fit, I would be open to men of different sizes, what I am looking for is an equal in morals, passions and intellect, drive and humour. I do not have a clue why you would single me out. I would love to have a partner who might be over weight but was loving and giving and still handsome, as I consider myself attractive dispite my being overwieght. I would also love to have a partner who would support my efforts to lead a healther lifestyle. Anyway I hope you find your equal, I am determined to find mine. | |
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outdo
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Joined: 2/16/2006
Msg: 135 | |
| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/12/2006 4:12:30 PM | DELVE<<<<
I didn't ask for a personal review.
But again, you have canvassed your faulty logic. Men come and go? Where did I write that?
You admit you're not a successful woman yet you know the values of one? Nice try.
no need to get defensive hunny, you posted in a forum and got a review, thats the point.....
dont' dish it if you cant' take it............so did i....... | |
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outdo
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Joined: 2/16/2006
Msg: 136 | |
| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/12/2006 4:15:41 PM | ERIC ESTRADA
i agree with you
and i did not intend on saying your friends wil break the couple apart...
i was actually repeating what delve wrote earlier just trying to understand this forum
the more i think about it,,,,,perhaps opposites attract......LOL | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/12/2006 4:58:45 PM | | My mother always told me that it is just as easy to fall in love with a rich man as it is a poor man. I tell her every time that I like the poor ones so much more though. I consider myself to be successful, as do many men I have dated. I have to say I have never refused to date someone or stopped dating someone because of their job, but some have left me out of intimidation. I don't base success on the title or the salary, but rather the work ethic and drive. I grew up without money and anything more than being comfortable is more than I require. I choose men based on who they are, not what they do. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/12/2006 10:50:34 PM | | Well I don't think you need to have a degree to be successful, I don't have a degree but I have a great career that I love and I think loving your job is also a sign of being successful. I had a great opportunity and I took it. I also think that any woman that wouldn't date a man because of his career/job is snobby, and is out for the almighty dollar. If the Chemistry is there why should it matter where he works. This also applies to men as well, why should it matter what anyone does for a living if everything else you are interested in. That is just my opinion. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/13/2006 1:29:05 AM |
Would you date a fellow who was less sucessful than you? Would you date a blue collar worker?
*Sigh* Unfortunately, all of my ex's were less successful than me. That's why the concept of marriage scares me. I don't want to end up losing half of everything to some bum, or worse yet, pay him alimony! No thanks. That's why I'd rather be single.  | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/13/2006 3:48:19 AM | Absolutely. I am a successful professional women. I don't choose my partner based on income or education. I based successful relationships on how we make each other feel. How well do we work together as a couple.
I do care that he is employable in a honest, legal job, and that he enjoys the work he does! | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/15/2006 8:57:38 AM | | I will agree with kerrymh on this. If the man is going to feel inadequate because he of lesser professional standings or makes less many, then he'll end up resenting the fact that she has a better career, position, more money, or whatever. It's more about having what you feel good with. If a man feels good making only 15, 000 a year as a CNA, but wants to remain in that career regardless of his gf making 50,000 in some acounting business, then it's really up to the couple to decide that he should feel good about what he does and not feel badly that she makes more money. It's not her fault she makes more and it's his choice to make less, so it really shouldn't be an issue. Now, if you have a partner that refuses to work altogether, that's an entirely different thing. The only excuses for not working is disability or being a stay at home mom/dad. | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/16/2006 3:34:07 PM | | where in heavens sake,did you ever get the idea,that because you have an advanced degree,that you are somehow intellectually superior?perhaps you have a talent for rote learning,perhaps your recognitave abilities are finer attuned,but intelligence can be measured in many different ways.your responses sound like person who has very little self-worth,and therefore you have attempted to create a value in yourself with academics.also be reminded that p.h.d =piled higher and deeper!!!!!!!! | |
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| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/16/2006 3:35:36 PM | | where in heavens sake,did you ever get the idea,that because you have an advanced degree,that you are somehow intellectually superior?perhaps you have a talent for rote learning,perhaps your recognitave abilities are finer attuned,but intelligence can be measured in many different ways.your responses sound like person who has very little self-worth,and therefore you have attempted to create a value in yourself with academics.also be reminded that p.h.d =piled higher and deeper!!!!!!!! to felinessa | |
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detcam
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Joined: 3/9/2006
Msg: 149 | |
| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/16/2006 3:51:51 PM | The day that I go and date someone based on how successful they are in terms of education, money or some other extraneous thing – is the day I go out and shoot myself.
I date someone because of who they are as a person, and because I like who they are. The flip side to that coin is that there are a lot of women out there that are “just” house wives and mothers – does that mean they are not worth it because someone has a degree or has money?
Besides I have actually met a lot of losers that have a good education and a lot of money. | |
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kmhstx
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Joined: 8/23/2005
Msg: 150 | |
| Will successful women date a less sucessful man?
Posted: 4/16/2006 5:33:50 PM | | I may have had people misunderstand my idea of sucess from my first post. To me a university education does not mean either intelligence or sucess. I know a few people I went to school with only got there by cheating, and because they could throw a basket ball. That is not intelligence, or atleast intelligences and morals. My father is a very intelligent man and he does not have a university degree. And he is very sucessful, he has a great job, that he is very respected in, he follows his passions of music, and community service, he has a loyal, loving and wonderful wife and 3 sucessful adult children. So I just want to point out that I think sucess is not about throwing some 40000$ on an education. Some one who is happy and ambitious and passionate. Thats what I want. | |
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