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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 12/31/2008 8:54:15 PM | There's a couple of us around, Friendly.
That compatibility ideal for me translates into being friends at every level, capable of laughing at our shortcomings or at least smiling about them, and above all understanding, ourselves and each other.
You wouldn't think that would be so hard to do, but it surely is for so many of us. Maybe it's a sometimes inevitable clash of egos or pride, I really don't know. But I do know that deep friendship is the solid foundation for a romance for the ages. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 12/31/2008 9:49:35 PM |
That compatibility ideal for me translates into being friends at every level, capable of laughing at our shortcomings or at least smiling about them, and above all understanding, ourselves and each other.
You wouldn't think that would be so hard to do, but it surely is for so many of us. Maybe it's a sometimes inevitable clash of egos or pride, I really don't know. But I do know that deep friendship is the solid foundation for a romance for the ages.
Amen Old Folkie.... 
And I think you're one of them... Stay close and give us hope... okay???  | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/1/2009 12:42:11 AM |
That compatibility ideal for me translates into being friends at every level, capable of laughing at our shortcomings or at least smiling about them, and above all understanding, ourselves and each other.
You wouldn't think that would be so hard to do, but it surely is for so many of us. Maybe it's a sometimes inevitable clash of egos or pride, I really don't know. But I do know that deep friendship is the solid foundation for a romance for the ages.
Well, how about those apples... my entire profile in 4 sentences.
Would you be kind enough to let me replace my 25 yr. writing in the making profile with them, OldFolkie? 
Seriously!
*** I could always save my original in Word, and whip it out and paste it into emails for the Thicksters, right?  *** | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/1/2009 3:21:48 AM | If people would just be themselves at the start. Everyone is on their best behaviors, making that wonderful impression, you start to move along with the relationship and suddenly one day.....................who is this person? We all do it.
There is nothing wrong with being nice..........just be REAL. That is what a good relationship is based on. Just like the above quote. Friendship is a great place to start, but the 'chemistry' often gets in the way and that is the road often traveled until suddenly there is no other foundation in the relationship. We have all run with the wild horses only to get caught in the stampede because there was no other direction for the relationship. I think a lot of people, men and women, think their youth has passed them by and they seek it with a partner. It rarely lastd. Most are seeking compatible people, we just can't seem to locate them. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/1/2009 7:09:21 AM | I have read with interest all the posts in this thread. With few exceptions, pardon me for saying so....y'all just don't get it!
Yes, sex is good....but the real thing men over 60 want is intimacy! Physical and cerebral intimacy!!!!
I myself didn't realize this until my 50's. Yes, the sex act is good itself, but there are many more ways to achieve true intimacy. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/1/2009 8:48:22 AM | | ok,PalmBchGuy and anyone else who is sitting there nodding their head in agreement to this post...physical and cerebral intimacy....not just intimacy for sex sake...which it probably ends up as anyway if things don't work out....anyway,that got me thinking as perusual....how do you achieve these things in such a short time????....how does one cultivate this intimacy,or at least these kinds,in a few mos.?...it takes years for this kind of intimacy to develop in my own experiences...and why does it take men so long to figure it out?..huh?....tell me that...took you 50 some years?....well,maybe it didn't take you that long really,you felt it coming on for awhile,less need for sex,low libido,which most men blame on their wives...you know it screws up the women too...and it's sad really....destroys lots of relationships...the damage gets done,and then the "unloving" starts...maybe for some of us,maybe many of us,we know we might have to settle for less,or maybe,god forbid,we just make acquaintances and enjoy our liberty...it's better than being in a loveless(physical and cerebral intimacy in various stages)relationship or in some way being taken advantage of....we're all the same...all looking for that physical and cerebral perfection....it's scary how we settle for something as base as sex....lol....and stay with it for a long time,knowing full well that the emotional thing wasn't there anymore or is it?...so,you start searching again...we all gotta be hedonists..right?... | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/1/2009 3:07:27 PM | What OldFolkie said . . . Compatibility of the mind, humor(s) and heart. That's a good start. Deep, abiding friendship, YES. And a tingle . . . mmmm.
Beyond those basics, including decent table manners, I've always been surprised at which one out of a bunch attracted me. Nailing down exactly who you are and what you are looking for constructs walls. Remember that the grass outside those walls can be greener?
As OP points out, probably a lot of us in this age group have longevity limiting conditions. I believe that people were happier when they didn't have a label and a pill for every little thing the doctors say is wrong with them. If you plan to be bored out of your skull til death do you depart, your plan will absolutely be fulfilled. Boredom is a lifestyle choice.
No reason why that sled slide can't be a whoop-it-up rodeo of fun. If the stop at the bottom isn't too sudden, we might take several more runs at it. What we've lost in this age of information is that sense of adventure and discovery. We think we know everything, that it's all spelled out, that we even know when we are going to die. When my doctor told me I'd be dead by this time last year, I completely ignored him. Now I'm doing pretty darned well for a corpse. 
Every day we wake up above ground is a good day. Greet it with a laugh and a song! Expect the unexpected and you will never be disappointed.
Callothewild | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/2/2009 6:12:17 PM | Sheesh, I've just been reading some of the dialogue here and found most of it rather cynical and depressing.
For some reason, we Canadians tend to complain too much.
Remember that one drop of black paint from your brush clouds the whole cup of water.
It's 2009 and I'm fine. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/2/2009 6:31:58 PM | ANOTHER 60 YEARS?
(ignoring my own advice to read ALL the posts before posting to the last page of a 30 page thread)
and of course this site refuses to accept one liners - like brevity is a BAD thang.
Messages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be postedMessages this short may not be posted | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/4/2009 4:39:20 PM | | Sorry to hear such negativity. Is it a Canadian thing or just a woman who is still bitter? | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/25/2009 10:11:50 AM | I agree with you, Kpooks!! I'm almost 68....and I'm glad I'm not thinking on the negative!! If I were, I should get "packed up, prayed up and ready to go!!!"  | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/25/2009 1:50:00 PM | I think your response just made you a most sought after man. I know that`s what I like to hear! I just didn`t think there were any men out there that "get it" | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/25/2009 8:38:34 PM | Dear Justoneofu and all the Other Fabulous Women over 50:
Although I did not read every post it seems that many people chose to see only what they perceived as the negative in your comments rather than the valid point you were trying to make.
You are absolutely right...many men over 55 or 60 think a little more of themselves than is absolutely necessary and are living in some sort of "fantasyland".
Here are a few exerpts from profiles I read today:
63 year old man who lists a few extra pounds on his profile - my friends say I look really young - if you have a weight issue do not write as I will not respond - give me a break...he needs new friends with better eye sight and where does he get off saying he will only respond to young, slim women - why does the fact that a woman finds that profile irritating make her a ****!!!
58 year old man - I've been in an accident and I'm partially paralyzed but I'm only attracted to slim, fit women...so he's not good looking, can't walk, and probably can't even do it - who wants to fight me for him????
61 year old man - must be slim, fit and turn heads when she walks in a room - don't you think if this women can turn heads when she walks in a room she might be setting her sights a bit higher??
As you say....let's get real...most women that are over 50 have lived and loved, grown a few human beings in her body, given birth, breatfed, raised children, scrubbed floors and toilets, packed lunches, cooked hundreds of meals, wiped runny noses, gone to PTA meetings, supported her friends, had careers outside of the home, and are now babysitting our grandchildren!!!! We don't look like we stepped out of the centrefold of Playbody and we don't wanted to be valued just for our looks.
If this gorgeous, flawless, hard bodied, mild tempered, always agreeable, highly sexed woman happens to have a profile here on Plentyoffish, unless one of these men is secretly a multi-zillionaire she's probably not going to be interested. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/26/2009 5:51:39 AM | ***There's a couple of us around, Friendly.
That compatibility ideal for me translates into being friends at every level, capable of laughing at our shortcomings or at least smiling about them, and above all understanding, ourselves and each other. ***
Let's see: A couple means you are ONE....So where is the other one, in Timbuktu??? I'm still looking for him!!   | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/26/2009 10:23:25 AM | Dear OP,
I'm sympathetic to your complaint, but this isn't just a guy-over-60 problem. Frankly, it's the nature of online dating that affects what goes on here and that includes females, too.
First, online dating is like catalog shopping, except that the commodities are people and romance too often takes a back seat to customer demands.
Second, some people treat the medium so casually that they'll load up their profiles with a list of what they don't want to the point that potential partners are deterred. In a normal chance meeting, these couplings might have a better chance of success.
Third, a lot of folks cheat on the photos and profiles the way McDonalds photographs its burgers. Disappointment is inevitable.
Bottom line- online dating is probably better than the combo of alcohol, impaired judgment, and closing time at the clubs, but even that is debatable.
Alcohol is largely responsible for a whole lot of couplings that might never have taken place without it.
Hmmm...one wonders about the role of alcohol in the dramatic success of homo sapiens.
Had the dinosaurs had alcohol, might things have turned out differently for us? :)
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 1/31/2009 2:25:27 AM | You hit the mark, when you mention "Shopping". The way the replies come (if they do) is remarkably like browsing through a rack of clothes. Click, Click, Click. If one tries (the recommended) little question to help a response, the lack of anything, except "I don't think we (you) are a good match," indicates to me the level of connection to what's being attempted in the darn computer screen. "Instant messaging" what a joke. You can't hear a gentle laugh to show intent, but the phone is next best. At least you can get to know a little, before the 'coffee' or walk. I don't walk so well, anymore, but I think well on my rear end (sitting, that is). People read how they think the other is speaking, which is why I'm growing weary of this method of meeting. Seems like the town I live in is below the standards of the 'big city' to the north, so consistant are the rejections, though I'm well within their mileage statements.
"What do we want?" How about an honest observation of the intent of the person. I came to POF because 2 ladies on match.com said 'go there'. One never responded, the other: "We've nothing in common" even though by her posted 'date quiteria' I was ok, and I thought, worth talking about. Makes me want to get a nap.  | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/10/2009 1:56:24 PM | I would say that if a man is not willing to take care of his health and appearance he shoulld not expect his counterpart to do so. If he is over weight so shall his barbie be! If he, on the otherhand does take care of himself and is weight concious it would only seem fair to be seeking the same in his lady.
Just a thougth.... Maybe what you may deserve is not what you desire.
Best of Luck to all who are brave enough to Search rather than wait and hope for? | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/11/2009 10:32:34 PM |
......what men need to do is spend more time in hospitals and old age homes instead of dating sites and bars and hanging around younger guys...the fear of immortality makes them silly...
I suspect she meant to say mortality and I have to agree that's a bit of a kicker though I tend to see it as a gender non-specific kind of thing.
Perhaps she really meant 'morality'.......
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/11/2009 11:11:24 PM |
justoneofu on 3/29/2006 12  35 AM Subject: What do men 60 plus want? Message: It's time for we seniors to get a realistic attitude here. I joined this dating thing to find a companion for outings, talks, or maybe to sit under the stars with some of my home made wine, talk about and reflect on past experiences. Instead I'm reading men's unrealistic expectations of what they want out here. Hey people, we are in the recycling bin of humans. We are going through it looking for the least damaged yet usable for a few more years. Sixty plus is the toboggan ride down and off this planet. I'm reading,' looking for someone between the ages of twenty eight and sixty five'. Say what you mean. You'd like one more hard body romp before you can't do it anymore or the viagra kills you. Another guy wants a good listener. In other words we are to listen to you and only you. Another wants to spoil one of us. Hey, I can spoil myself if that's what I want. Some of us won't even make it to seventy and those of us who do will be looking for companionship. If sex happens, we'll be elated. Most everyone says they don't do drugs, and that only means that none of you are suffering from arthritis, heart problems, and the many other inflictions we suffer from being blessed with reaching this age. Long walks? Give me a break. Eat right, don't smoke, exercise, we are all going to die anyway. At this stage of life there is no such thing as a long term relationship. I wish there was some way to get everyone on this dating line into one hall. We could mingle, and reject those we don't want in one shot instead of having to go through each and every profile because profiles are saying nothing. It's time to stop, look, and enjoy those things that we've all been too damn busy to even know existed. Lots of hugs, kisses, romance, long walks........Lord, I'd like to slap some people 
WOW What a negative post. Maybe you need to hang out with more positive active people. You may want to start by slapping some sense into yourself.
Why is it some people assume that all people over the age of sixty are ready for the grave? My Mom had an active sex life and was still skiing well into her eighties. Many studies show that people who are active and healthy in lifestyle choices, live long happy lives. Which indeed does include long walks as well as hikes. Playing tennis, golf, kayaking, skiing.
Living where I do here in California I have lost count of the number of over sixty men/women out on Lance Armstrong style rides, or running six or miles per day. Some do all the local and state 12k+ races. Come August over 12000 will be in San Francisco for the Senior Games. Will be there myself. Heck I am in my early sixties, and take no meds, don't need glasses. Work and play hard.
One of my dearest friends a Zen Master, died recently at over age ninety and he could run circles around people fifty years younger. Many of the women in my yoga class are in their seventies and all have awesome life partners. One of the people who have helped me the most at the fitness center is someone in their seventies who works out daily for an hour. Ten years ago it was an SDA (Seventh Day Adventist) woman in her eighties who got me back into rock climbing and hiking when she spoke to a group of us, about her yearly treks up Mt Whitney in southern California.
~Beth~ | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/12/2009 6:22:23 AM | In response to many of the previous posts:
There is room in this world for...
those over-60 who just wish to relax and enjoy a gentle lifestyle...
those over-60 who wish to enjoy 'getting out there and doing all they can do'...
and the many of over-60's who are inbetween both pleasant extremes.
It's all good, ya know?
One 'sect' shouldn't really be fussing at the other sects.
Everyone should just live their life the way they enjoy, and find others who have the same mind.
Simple. | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/13/2009 8:35:36 AM | Can I say what a woman who is 60-plus wants? I want to be able to instantly find a profile for the man who puts me on his list of favorites! When someone mentions me as a favorite -- TOTALLY UNREALISTICALLY BECAUSE HE HAD NEVER EXCHANGED AN EMAIL WITH ME, LET ALONE A WORD OF CONVERSATION -- I want to know who he is! | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/13/2009 8:58:13 AM | A few years back, I wrote a letter to the editor of my alumni mag which was published by the same along with a letter from a man that expressed the same point of view.
Apparently, a few years ago, before we were aware that the economy had tanked, some enterprising people found work writing "personal ads" for people. Give me a break! All that does is show perspective matches that you can afford to employ a stooge, which in turn says some negative things about you, beginning with you can not be bothered to write about yourself.
Most of the agent-penned letters represented women. Surprised? Well, this alumni mag almost always had letters from women. They are always gorgeous red heads (that's the color most hair dyes create) with "legs that don't stop (conjuring up images of the schlock sci-fi movie Attack of the 50 Foot Woman)."
Of course, these women all are described as looking like some movie star. Gimme a break! If you are a 60 year old woman (and who else but a 60 year old woman would look for a man between 57 and 63? People generally chose an age bracket that surrounds their own age.), you can not look like a 30 year old actress! Grow up! If you insist on writing that (make that allowing it to be written about you), than please do not say that you are honest or that you value integrity because you are a liar. You could say that you look like you could be the actress' mother! You might say you are an Actress Sally-type but you can not say you look like like Actress Sally if you are old enough to be her mother.
Or, pick an actress your age or older. Let's face it, there is nothing wrong with looking like Susan Saradon or Sally Fields or Diane Keaton if they are your age peers.
Anyway, the guy wrote along the same lines, adding where were all these slim, gorgeous, sensitive, long-legged women when he was a student. He just did not remember them.
While I haven't found many men saying they look like George Clooney or Hugh Jackman (who are both more than 40), many men do want more than they can offer.
And please don't tell me that men age more gracefully than women. I currently work part-time in a liquor store. When I see a man who looks good, I try to catch a glimpse at his driver's license if he leaves his bill fold open on the counter while paying. If I think he looks my age (not quite 62), he is generally in his early 50s!
Guys, prior to have your picture taken to post on a web site, comb your hair! It is always a good start! | |
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| What do men 60 plus want?
Posted: 4/14/2009 10:44:48 AM | If you are a 60 year old woman (and who else but a 60 year old woman would look for a man between 57 and 63? People generally chose an age bracket that surrounds their own age.), you can not look like a 30 year old actress!
This post is hilarious! I love it! At 57 I am dating 35 to 45 year old women. These younger women look at me and like or at least are OK with what they see or they would not choose to date me. I am NOT dating 60 year old women and probably would not consider doing so until I am at least 80. Most men in their 50's and certainly in their 60's would prefer to date younger women. Certainly, those who are able to do so date younger women. | |
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