| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 2/6/2007 7:32:20 PM | I was kidding before
inner beauty of course
someone can be beautiful looking and if they are not a nice person the more time you spend with them the less you see the intial beauty you thought was there
someone less attractive who has a beautiful heart the more time you spend with them the more you see their beauty and then wonder to yourself why was my intial reaction that this person was not beautiful | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 2/6/2007 7:42:30 PM | this kinda question is rather silly...
As a friend...well there is only the inner...
but someone i want to have "hot monkey sex" with...sorry but i have to be attracted to them.
So in the end its a combination...not an either or...unless someone wants to go around blinding everyone...
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 2/7/2007 12:01:04 AM | Hello Dawn1114,
I don't think anyone sees their inner beauty, we are far to critical of ourselves to see it. there is a song its title alludes me right now but the lyrics go "we are what we don't see" I used to see myself as so flawed that i would never be able to be in any relationship. I met someone though that didn't flinch even though i thought i i was a horrible person she seen something different. She's amazing she just sees these things just as you say "a part of being human" slowly over time i was able to relax and accept myself just as i am and shine because i am human. When i started expressing with my heart instead of identifying with all my so called flaws I finally seen that I could relate on such a meaningful level that being in a relationship isn't such a scary thing any more.
I do think we are all good on the inside not in some way that puts us above others but on an equal playing field. Hurts are not inner flaws nor are the resulting behaviors. They just cover up who we really are inside, we are protecting ourselves from being hurt again thats all. A human thing.
hugs,
Mark | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 2/7/2007 1:34:57 AM |
Inner beauty lasts…
Not necessarily. I’ve seen some pretty good people turn into real ***holes.
…I have met physically attractive women, but often thier inner qualities show thru and all that I can see is an ugly person with a nice wrapper. For me an Oprah type of person wins hands down over the Paris Hiltons of the world. People that are not as high on the mainstream hot-bod scale have to develop their inner selves, whereas the hotties of the world are often given all the attention and therfore never find the need to improve thier personality...
One has to wonder where you’re finding these women! I do agree that if one is physically attractive they don’t really ‘need’ to develop other skills because of the way that society treats them. Lots of studies have been done on the whole ‘looks get you further in life’ phenomenon. But still other factors, like how someone is raised also plays into it. If they are raised to be superficial (that looks are everything) then they probably will be. It’s unfortunate but you can’t really blame them for being brought up like that. It doesn’t mean they don’t have a good heart. But on the other hand there are the non-superficial people who have had a very different upbringing from the latter. I think there are many beautiful, smart wonderful women out there that could make you kick yourself for making a statement like that. | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 2/7/2007 10:44:40 AM | I think we all need to connect with people that have a suitable personality to ourselves....we all mostly want a person with a wonderful "inside"...but the outside is what we are initially attracted to and hopefully continue to be attracted to. I realize that not everyone will appreciate my looks...or my personality...thats fine...we all have our preferences.
I have felt badly about meeting a nice guy that I wasn't attracted to-and therefore didnt want to see again. I have tried to even go beyond the first date and continue to see them to see if there was more of a connection. It just made dating unpleasant and ackward in my opinion. I wouldnt want someone to just compromise and be with me if they weren't attracted to the outside. But of course-we want to get to know the inside and connect on a deeper level. | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:04:50 PM | so so true people say how beautiful l am inside and then they see me and because l wear a size 18 l am pushed to the side maybe l am a overweight and maybe l have a good reason but l have a heart and sound mind alot more than l can say for some of these skinny nuts out here not directing to petite women , you got it well l am happy for you but l have gone out with what other women consider dogs and they had hearts of gold and you know l never traded none of them for a better looking man maybe one who knew his limits with alcohol alot better.........
but on the real side l do look at good looking men and have gone out with them but their stuck in the mirror more than me and they think they are God's gift to women but then it goes for women to.......l always taught my kids that there is always someone better than you but there is also someone worst than you so take what you have call it blessed and appreciate and enjoy who you are........     | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:16:26 PM | Definitely inner as appearance changes over time. However, if initially the other is totally unattractive to you, the chance of it going anywhere is probably pretty slim.
I have met men tho who initially I wasn't that physically attracted to but who in time I found really grew on me physcially because the inner beauty was very much there. | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 6/23/2008 6:34:18 PM | Obviously, we all have different things we find attractive, and what we find attractive and appealing changes over time. Really, when I was 21, I never expected to find gray hair (or no hair) attractive at all. However, at 51, gray hair can look pretty good!
Sometimes, the most attractive person on the outside, is really ugly inside and has a heart that is deceitful and wicked. And sometimes, a person has such inner beauty and character that the beauty just shines forth and changes the way you see them. And of course, when you love someone, they're the most attractive person in the world.....people can grow on you and one day you look at them and they've been transformed.
I had a male acquaintance who was pretty good looking, eye candy for sure, and I used to think I could look at him all day and not get tired of looking at him. Over time, I got to know him a little better, the "inside" person, and it changed the way I saw him, I discovered he's really not very attractive at all. But women are still falling all over him. If they only knew. Appearances can be quite deceiving. | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:09:44 AM | I agree with you on that from first hand experience. I grew up heavy but got in real good shape in my twenties. I was off work for a while from lay off so I put a few punds on. I still date beautiful people on the outside and in but it seems like on some dating sites, people just go for people with looks and muscles which is okay but some of those people that never struggled with a weight issue are egotistical anf not open to learning about life. Real life like struggles. I am now getting back in shape and it's cool that some people don't give me the time of day. When I get in shape like before, I skip shallow people. Example: I went to a high school reunion. Where I was considered a nerd long ago, now I got ex cheerleaders flirting with me. lol Anyhow, I just want to say, that is an unfortunate truth and reality that todays people are kinda shallow since they don't take time to know others that might make them happy and laugh alot.
I say go on and forget about those people anyhow that don't return emails or take time to get to know you. If your smart, genuine and have self intergrity, it is not such a big deal. I mean even now, I would rather be alone then go with someone that thinks their better than me. I have to admit though. I still like dating people better looking then me. lol I'm a man and a woman should be the pedals on the flower, not the stem. lol..
jamison(jamie) | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:44:43 AM | the most beautiful people I've known were beautiful both internally and externally - almost like their internal beauty reflected externally also....
but, then, I see beauty in everybody, especially in their eyes.....perhaps that is where internal beauty really comes through and shows.  | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/4/2008 9:58:08 AM | I think younger guys care more about the outside than older guys, not that there is anything wrong with wanting an attractive person to be with, but I think as you get a bit older you want a bit more substance than just a pretty face. and are willing to trade a hot body for someone who may be a bit more experienced in life and have gone through some things. I would think that would be very more sexy  | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/4/2008 12:05:07 PM |
I think that outer beauty is crucial in any relationship. We can't lie and pretend we are going to be attracted to an ugly person with a heart of gold... We wont' even want to see their heart if we don't enjoy their looks. Honesty is the best policy. -E
Both matter....outer beauty first and then when you get to know each other inner beauty counts more....
The truth is on dating sites, outer beauty comes first.....if it was otherwise, than blue boxes would get more responses, but the facts are that if you post a picture you are 4-5 times more likely to get a response.....so stop with the bs everybody, cause you ain't being realistic...
looks matter....don't try to be politically correct, just be honest.....no chemistry no connection.....
Inner beauty matters too, it is what is discovered as the two of you meet & get to know each other more....eventually inner beauty matters more and that is probably mostly related to compatibility for each of us.....
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/4/2008 12:44:24 PM | | Inner beauty! I am attracted to outer beauty initially but if there is no inner beauty...forget it! As I was asked several times when I was younger...'What are you going to do when your looks fade?' Well, now that I have grown older...I'm not barbie anymore but I still have my inner beauty. I think when I was younger the boys didn't look deep enough to see my inner beauty as they were too busy concentrating on my body parts! | |
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| inner beauty of the person or the outside beauty of person prefer
Posted: 7/16/2008 1:40:14 PM | | In the beginning we see outer beauty and that makes the first attraction. Normal human behavior. But the end result is that "inner" beauty speaks volumes ahead of outer beauty. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder. Inner beauty touches your heart like no other. | |
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