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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/9/2006 5:15:38 AM | Well with the rising cost of gas, the rip off rates for insurance and cost of the car and upkeep, I found living in the city where the transit system is very reliable and living/working along the subway line, I have no need to have a car. I save alot not owning one and can put that money towards something better. Also with the rising cost of Hydro, I would rather put my money towards that before owning a car just so I can have a date possibly. But what I have found really interesting is, all the women who I met who also live in the city expect a guy to have a car, pick them up, take them wherever they want, pay ofr the date, drive them home. And if he does not have the car, no matter what if he is a great guy they say forget it no dating him.
Some even expect a guy to have a really nice car, nice place to live so she can also crash there anytime. Unreal. Why does the guy have to foot the bill for everything? Nothing is meet in the middle with costs?
Almost like "Hey pay for the car before anything else in your life" LOL. I will stay dateless then. | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 227 | |
| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/9/2006 5:39:54 AM | Same here. No way, no how will I only be accepted by a female for what I own/drive/buy/save ( account balance ), before I am accepted for my heart and how much I can care for her.
Women don't like it when we view them that way, why should we have to accept them for viewing us like that ???
I am thinking of changing my profile again to say something like
HI I own a house, I have a job and have my own business where I pull in close to $80,000 a year, now I know this means nothing, but I am a sweet caring man who is willing to spend his hard earned money just getting to know you, and hell if you can't stand the site of me being near ya, don't worry you can hide in the back of my 2004 fully loaded BMW with heated seats as I drive you anywhere you wanna go on a daily basis lol
BTW if I did do a profile like that I'd be banned probably lol Hell I am probably being banned on 30-40 women's profiles now lol
Ya know Underworld, we are stupid for thinking this way, but it's like the TTC -- the better way  | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/9/2006 9:52:13 AM | I would date a guy who didn't have a car.
I have to have a car for work, and besides, I have three kids to cart around, but I would much rather bike to work and put my money into house stuff. Yay Shappy!
I was in awesome shape when I was using my bicycle and walking for everything!
Actually I am dating someone now who doesn't own a car. He has more money than I do for extras! I call him my Sugar Daddy - I guess he can call me his chauffeur. (oh, he does have a license though. I would NOT date someone with no driver's license - I'm not doing all the driving!) And no, he's not rich or anything - it's not a matter of money. I talked the talk and now I walk the walk - money isn't what I judge people on!
So hang in there, non-car owners. If someone is really worth your time she/he won't judge you on whether you have a car or not! | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/9/2006 9:59:10 AM | From the many repsonses so far, I'm to assume it's expected the guy does all the driving... oh and paying for dinner too..and the movie, and whatever else. Maybe I've been lucky so far, but most women I've gone out with have offered willingly to drive (and pick me up which is awesome too, especially if the guy is 'expected' to pay for everything else that evening.). In this day and age, there are far more important things to consider in a potential mate, and it's not like mass transit can't get you to the mall. (and I do have a car, a nice noe at that, but it has no bearing on how a date may go)
Now, reverse the question for us men. I bet most of us don't mind if a woman doesn't have a car/bike. Seems a bit superficial to me that something like a vehicle is mandatory before a woman gives you the light of day.
Also, props  to the few guys I've read about here who have ditched their car due to financial reasons - thats the smart thing to do. These steel beasts cost a lot to keep on the road. A woman that dosen't understand or respect one's time of financial burden, isn't worth your time anyway, so don't fret. | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/9/2006 10:29:02 AM | I just say who cares car, no car, license, no license, does not change who someone is.
As for saying you do not want to be a chauffeur, if a guy never asks to be picked up and riven everywhere how does one become a chauffeur then?
Basically all the women I dated before have had cars and not once did i ever ask any of them to come over and pick me up. I even took the bus in a snowstorm to her place without any complaints on my part, took me 2 hours. I just sat back on the bus and subway and listened to my discman.
Interesting how the most common comment by women is "I don't want to be a guy's chauffeur. remember NOT every guy will expect you to drive him all over town. Unfortunately what I have heard and seen is almost all women expect a guy to do that. The double standard in the vehicle part in dating is just unfair.
Woman says she worked all day and is tired and should be picked up, guy says he worked all day and is tired and she will complain and say "Just come and pick me up"
I'll take the 40 window coupe as it has someone else driving while I sit back and relax.
The money I save from not owning a car I get to enjoy taking 2 trips basically a year if i feel like it. Like I did this year. I would rather put that money I save from not owning a luxury to something better. | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/17/2006 9:47:50 AM | If you live in the city, then yes, car or no car, license or no license. If you live in a rural area, you drive or you're fcked! Where I grew up there were no cabs. You learned to drive or you walked/biked 3 miles to the nearest corner store.
Since I don't plan to live in the city forever, a guy has to have his license for me to be interested in dating him. Not to mention that it shows some willingness to expand your horizons if you can drive. It also expands your work choices.
It IS interesting that women don't want to be chauffeurs. Many of us don't have that "I want to drive" instint. I am just as happy to be a passenger. More room to move around, it's more comfy. But lots of very anxious or controlling people must drive or they are pushing holes in the passenger floor braking!
I do think that guys tend to drive more than women do. When driving in couples, I think the men drive more than the women. Why? Good question.
Agreed? | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/17/2006 10:16:26 AM | syn ap ^^
I'm happy to drive, in fact I prefer to be the driver - and I'm definitely female. :-) If the guy wants to kick in for gas once in a while, that's a bonus, but for short trips around town, it's not necessary.
I don't mind picking up the tab for an evening once in a while, too, and since I do live in the city, there are always things to do that are free/low cost. It's great to go for a walk near the water on a warm summer's eve and watch the sailboats.
Whether or not the guy has a car doesn't come close to being on the list of things I'd like to know before I date someone. | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/17/2006 10:28:15 AM | While I would date someone without a car, it seems to be a hinderance too. I mean, this guy I've been communicating with has no car at the moment. It makes it difficult for him to meet up in any location, and I sense that he'd rather not have a "stranger" pick him up at home or work or drive him anywhere. (makes sense too, since another thread is all about how to protect yourself on that first date).
Either that, or "He's just not that into me" and I need to get over it, lol. | |
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bevem
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Joined: 8/12/2006
Msg: 234 | |
| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/17/2006 8:50:52 PM | | Absolutely. It matters not to me if they have a car or even if they can drive. If lack of transportation became a problem, I'm certain we could come up with a solution! | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/18/2006 8:39:39 AM | It does seem though even in a big city like Toronto, the majority of women want a guy to have a car regardless that the cost is not worth it now in this city. As I say unless you need it for work, living here there is no need for it. But unreal how owning a car is what you will be based on, not how you are as a person. Crazy and is the way the times today are. There are some women who could care less but they are becoming few and far between. Also then there is the type of car you have to have.
As I say not my loss, it is their loss if I am to be judged by if/what I drive. I guess how I treat someone would not matter then.
I sure do not judge the women on if they have a car, type of car, where they work, how they look. I judge them on how they are as a person. Maybe time to change that perception??? No way, I expect to be judged the same. If a woman does not have a car so be it. | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/18/2006 10:45:34 AM | _________________________________________
_________________________________________
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I do NOT have a car "RIGHT NOW" so ......right now...I am only looking for a relationship with a WOMAN who is in my own city.
And I do not mind if She does not have a car.
* To just say "No I would never date a guy without a car" is just SO - materialistic and shallow.
If you dont't agree...I don't care !!!!
move past my profile...do NOT stop go way past Thank You
I know the real You .... | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/18/2006 12:27:49 PM | P.S...THIS DOES NOT APPLY TO ALL WOMEN!!!
To be honest with all you out their but mostly for the women that wont date a man without a car:
Women fought for equal rights in this country.. they some what got it
Women fought for topless rights...they got it
when it comes down to child/custody issues.. they pretty much have it
when it comes to domestic/ violence..who do you think gets charged?
bet its not the women!!
women seem to have forgotton that they are the ones that fought for this.. so why not pic up the cheque after a dinner date..or least offer to pay.
If they have a car..why not pick up your date
Seems that the only females that are worried about weather their man has a car or not is cause they
1) Dont want to be a Taxi...which i can understand
2) Dont have a car themselves.. For finacial reason/no licence ect..
3) want a guy who has a nice car so they can borrow it to go and pick up other guys while the owner of the car is home taking care of HER children.
Im sorry , yes i am a women but i see so many good men being taken advantaged of these days by women it makes me sick.This tend to ruin it for us good women.
To the Guys out thereweather you have a nice care or not it doesnt matter, if its not new or its not sporty she wont be seen withyou in it anyways,why waste yout time on trying to impress someone that has her sights set on one thing, materal things..not worth it, it wont work..sorry
If they are into you , it shouldnt matter what you have or dont have.
Im sure i will get some nasty responses from this post but you know what.. who cares!!
Give the guys a break....Mystical | |
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| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/19/2006 7:27:59 AM | ^^^Oh my god!!! You mean to tell me that there are actually some decent respectful women still in existance after all these decades? I applaude you Mystical and I respect you big time after a post like that because that said it perfect.
A guy holds the door for a woman and he gets a dirty look or she just has a mean look on her face and does not say thank you, or even better ends up going through another door herself.
Yes women's lib started it all, and yes women have come very far in this world, but now men are EXPECTED to have everything that also makes the women look great.
The most common rejection seems to be about what the guy drives or lack of, and type of job. Why those two things matter so much over how someone is just boggles my mind.
I for one am a guy who will in fact go out of my way for the woman I date because I enjoy doing nice things for the woman I love. But where women get the expecting it attitude is beyond me.
It ruins alot for those decent, great women out there who are in fact the best women a guy could have a relationship with. But from the many bad apples, it ruins for those great women. Sad but so true.
But when a guy says that, haha, he gets the usual "well you guys screw us women around so we have to be this way to weed out the bad apples"
If a car matters so much ladies, then why not date a car. Go rent one that looks nice and cruise around in it. Because obviously the guy sure does not matter seen as you will base dating him on if he has a car or not.
Again Mystical, awesome post, in fact a few of my women friends have said something very much the same. Kudos to you and if you get bashed it is because you told the truth and laid it on the line for all to read. | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 239 | |
| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/19/2006 7:41:57 AM | Mystical
Geez I almost died from a hard-on from reading your post
But it's true, it's mostly about the wheels, and they don't care at times how they hurt someones feeling.
I actually had a buddy who got hit with #3 on your list. Drove 3 hours to meet her, got there for 2 hours, and she had to run off to the store, he sat and watched her 3 kids, 7 hours later she comes home pissed out of her mind with another guy.
Seems she told her girlfriends that she was getting a car for the weekend, and they could hit the bar.
He got up, after she got home, started to drive home, was pulled over by the cops as there were 6 calls into the OPP for his car being all over the road.
Until someone can walk in my shoes when it comes to having a car, paying for gas, maintaince, insurance, and still able to keep myself in the black, then they have no idea.
It's like when you read someone's profile and they say " no pic no chat " don't ya think it would really kill a lot of self esteem if you saw " no car, no meet " lol | |
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| Driving to Dates
Posted: 8/19/2006 9:27:14 AM | A car is a depreciating asset with high maintenance costs. Sort of like a woman. Just kidding.
In most of Ontario you pretty much need a car to get around. There really is no way around that fact of life and your car is an indication of your economic and social standing. That is kind of crazy but there you go.
That accepted, fact is there are a lot of folks who don't have a car. When they get introduced to the convenience of having a car, their attitude changes somewhat. All of a sudden walking to do groceries is no longer acceptable. Taking a bus is too slow to go anywhere. A cab is too expensive. They start expecting a ride for a walk around the block and, if they can drive, they want to drive your car. And remember, if they have an accident, the insurance company will hold you responsible.
I'm sure a lot of women are put off by a guy who has this change come over him. I'm fine with women who do so long as I'm getting what I want out of the relationship. In the end, it can become an annoyance and another reason to part ways.
All that said, I find the number of people addicted to the car culture here perplexing. My basic rule of thumb is total cost of a car should be about 5 percent of revenue or less (that includes cost and/or payments, gasoline and maintenance, insurance and parking). But I know people that spend more on their car than for rent or mortgage. In my opinion, quite a few people put way to much money into their car. A car moves you around, more or less efficiently. If I were living in the core of Toronto I can't imagine owning a car. If I needed one for some reason, I'd rent.
There are people that have issues with the car I drive. I could care less. The car is safe and reliable. Not sure if it would pass an e-test but then again, it doesn't have to. I have a lot more money to actually enjoy because my car isn't eating up my disposable income. Any guy that thinks a car will get a girl is wrong, in my opinion. I mean, exactly how many women do you meet, driving down the street? A material girl might turn it into a deal-breaker in due course, but so what? | |
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| Driving to Dates
Posted: 8/19/2006 10:17:56 AM | I haven't read through all this thread, but it appears that it has slid somewhat into a debate as to whether the type of car is important, by showing wealth or status. Back to the original question (applying equally to men and women), "would you date (someone) without a car?"
To this point (well in the past 20 years, anyway) I have not dated a girl who didn't have her own transportation. It has nothing to do with wealth or being a status symbol, only convenience. I live in the suburbs. Dating has usually meant travel to a certain extent. I'm not willing to be the only one to spend time getting to and from. Weekends for me usually involve travel, vacations too.
All the power to those who can get by without a vehicle, but I can't and don't want to. | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/20/2006 8:40:48 AM | hey think about it guys, if a woman does not date you because you do not own a car, think of the money you save each month. I mean no gas, insurance, maintanence for the car and no paying for the date each time. Lots saved there. And not your loss guys because hey if a car decides on if a guy is worthwhile to date then you just made the better decision to not bother with that type of woman. Think if your car broke down or got stolen while you are dating a woman who would not date a guy without a car? She would then say see ya...unless you got a new car on the road quicly. LOL
By the way 2tall can you imagine driving all around Metro Toronto, not Mississauga, Brampton, Markham, etc but TORONTO. Ever see the traffic at all times of the day? Drive downtown and pay to park each time, see if it is worth it for you to drive to dates here? Sadly I know too many people who WILL drive to pick up their date and then drive downtown to a bar or restaurant and then after a few drinks get in the car to drive her and himself home...hmm is that smart? Oh ya gotta have a car to get a date. many women will actually get in the car with their date after he has had a few drinks too. many women would never take transit downtown or a cab. They want to get a drive. Why this is I have no clue but go to the Entertainment District and watch how many men and women go back to their cars half corked or loaded and get behind the wheel with a passenger or two in the car.
I went on a date one time, met her at Yonge/Bloor and we took the subway 3 stops to Dundas and walked out across to the Hard Rock Cafe for dinner and drinks, took the subway up to Sheppard Stn, waited for the Sheppard East bus with her, got on it with her, made sure she got home and then I headed home...hmm has any woman ever had that happen or even asked? Oh ya of course not, that is crazy, gotta have a car. | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 243 | |
| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/20/2006 9:23:08 AM | Ralph
A car does not show your standing at all. I mean tons of kids get mommy and daddy to buy them a car. Leasing from a 3rd party is cheaper. I mean, back when I was like in my 20's the only way a guy under 30 was able to afford to drive a BMW is if the car was his parents. Now you see them all over the place.
Cars have gotten more powerful and faster and the styling of them is great, but more than not kids or even people in their 30's are being careless of their money.
A guy already knows that a nice expensive car will get a girl. A woman always loves to be seen in a nice car, or one that has been supped up.
Your standing is in your credit, not cause of the car you drive. | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/21/2006 2:31:43 PM | I would agree that a car is not a good measure of your standing. I do however understand that there are women that will take the car you drive, or that you have a car, into consideration. In my case, the car I drive might to tell you that I'm cheap (I'm also easy but that's an entirely different topic). Personally, I don't think of myself as cheap so much as a person that is wary of spending. There are women who find the image projected by the car I drive rather disturbing too. Oh well. On the plus side, it has a really comfortable back seat to stretch out on;)
If a woman wants to base her opinion of me on my car, or whether I have a car, fine. I accept that some women-folk do it. Her experiences probably has something to do with this too. That just doesn't concern me. If she can't accept it, so be it.
I would technically disagree that "a nice expensive car will get a girl" because initially meeting and so forth generally won't involve a car, at least in my experience. Well, maybe if you're first meeting at a drive-thru, parking lot or an accident. I would agree that your car will help your cause afterward. Plenty of women have argued for getting a "better" car if they end up in a relationship with me (including both wives) and that tells me that something about their socialization and expectations. I actually thought the fact that my latest car has an FM tuner was a huge advance into the modern age for me.
If a particular woman is put off by your not driving a Viper, well... she's got a lot of issues. Personally, I'd be greatful for not getting the chance to be with her. Chances are good she will suck you dry -- and not in a good way.
However, if you really want to know about the economic and social standing of an individual, you pretty much have to do a comprehensive asset and debt analysis. Most people, I think, would find that test a bit tough to pass. I do get the feeling though that this is usually reserved for a lot later and that is when the facade most people hide behind is faced with breaking.
Having a car or not doesn't say much about you and if that is honestly a woman's reason to nix a date, I'd have to say be greatful you didn't get the chance. | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/23/2006 2:09:56 AM | Silly ol me, forgot to put in my last post that yes i would date a guy if he didnt have a car.
i would also like to say to all the gentlemen that personaly went out of their way to message me because of my post,, that was great guys..thanks
and for the women that sent me all the nasty ones that i expected....
!! DONT HATE ME CAUSE IM BEAUTIFUL!!...LMAO
I cant help it if the truth hurts and if you got upset about that, well then you are probably one of the ones i was referring to.....
LOL, well guys, i hope life has been treating you fairly and all the best
....Mystical | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/23/2006 8:15:07 AM | | Like I said before, there is hope for us carless men out there living in the city. You give us hope Mystical. Much appreciated. Why women sent you nasty messages for stating the truth is beyond me. I still never could get where women know what a guy is like based on if he has a car or not. Strange and we will never find out the truth to that. | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/23/2006 8:34:11 AM | | All I know is that when I didn't have a car it was very hard to get a date. I do have a car now and it does make a world of difference. | |
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| Save Money Guys
Posted: 8/23/2006 9:38:54 AM | i WOULD, but it makes things a lot harder cause i don't have access to a car whenever i want
but i would never say NO, i won't date you because you have no car!! | |
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Shaps
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Joined: 4/23/2005
Msg: 250 | |
| Would you date a guy without a car
Posted: 8/23/2006 2:15:45 PM | One girl messaged me saying how she wanted to prove me wrong from my profile. Once I stated that my engine was in my trunk, she never got back. She only proved me one thing.
Since I own my own business and run it from home ( most girls assume I have a store ), they are like " how can you run a business without a car ? "
Easy
My wholesalers all use Fedex/UPS/CP-Xpresspost etc etc to deliver
If I spend more than $400 per order shipping is free ( which saves me $10-15 in gas driving back and forth, plus I am normally spending way more than $400 per purchase as some boxes cost $400 alone )
I do Ebay mostly, so I don't have to drive anywhere to sell something.
I keep adding up the numbers on the cost of gas and maintaince and insurance, and while I hate not driving, I love the fact that money is more acessible to me then it was before with a charge card for gas and another for maintaince and all the little things which end up adding up to so much per month. | |
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