| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:26:26 AM | I've never stood anyone up. Wait Don't you have to get asked out first?!?!?
On the rare ocassion, I actually have a date, its usually with someone I know well. We're meeting cause we want to hang out and have fun. Maybe thats not a date?  | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:30:06 AM | For laidbackat42:
Even though I've been stood up, I still love you guys and believe that there are more good than bad - it's just the bad who seem to be more visible. Such is life. And I do believe that the serious guys are out there - they just haven't found me yet  | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 4:27:19 PM | I agree with you Laidbackat42, there are good guys out there. I have never stud up any lady i ask out dont belive in it an never will. If i'm sick the night it starts i'll call her an let her know that i'm sick but if i get better will call back an if not will tell her i'm sorry next week will go out . To many ppl don't think of ppl's feeling i do. Wish you the best here, so far i'm getting emails faster than ever befor an chatting with 3 of them now an i just signed up 3 days ago . Best wises Marc  | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 4:52:16 PM | i have been stood up once where the guy just simply disappeared--no call, no explantation, no anything....i thought that was pretty rude and uncalled for, but it just showed me that he lacked character, maturity, and respect and so i wouldn't want him anyways.....i guess people change their minds, or their pursuing someone else and want to keep quiet as to keep you as a back up in case things don't work out with the other lady and then come around at a later date with an excuse for bailing the first time (just a thought...lol), or their wife/girlfriend found out......
I have never ever stood someone up and i never plan on ever doing it either, if i can't make it --i will call you, or email you, or IM you, or text you--whatever, but i will let you know... | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 4:54:25 PM |
In general i believe it to be because most men are cowards! All talk and no do. Women, even throughout history have always shown more courage.
That wasn't "feminist"; it was just plain nasty. I couldn't even begin to count the number of dates I've been on and I've been stood up TWICE. Not exactly an earth shattering amount.
There's no part of being a strong courageous women that includes bashing men.
I've done it, cause I found something about them that became irritating. But I didn't notice it at first only after a few more dates. But then I didn't feel connected enough to them to think I should have to call to break it up.
Well, that would make you a coward. Only the emotionally immature treat others in this manner. Grown people treat others the way they would want to be treated.
I think both of you need a lesson in common courtesy and treating others with respect. | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:50:47 PM | o no-DONT stop givin those HONEST answers erperperp
tis quite the nice lil 'favor' you have done any unsuspecting
gals that may plan a 'date' with your charming self
to get a glimpse of YOUR 'irritating' lil characteristic(standing folks up)
BEFORE 'putting in' a few dates with you?
ahhhhhhhh, what a MAGNIFICENT opportunity
on behalf of ANY women considering WASTING their time on thee
THANK YOU vewy vewy much
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 7:52:56 PM | Don't worry I'm not really on this forum to date anyone. I'm just bored.
edit: I thought I'd just say, I did that when I was younger and so I mentioned it. You people are acting like I just did it, but I guess you didn't know the timeframe I was refering to when I mentioned it. And I mentioned it to give the OP a honest answer into why I did it at the time. It's not something I constantly do. But some girls when I was younger didn't make enough of an impression that I felt I needed to call them back. | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 8:08:13 PM | I know exactly what you mean. Although i guess i have to get my boundaries in place. This guy planned phone calls before we were to meet the phone calls never came the first 3 anyway. i waited up late for all. Then the fourth time it came i was at dinner with a girlfriend and the dinner was running late. Then i didn't even see him here for a week and then all of a sudden lets meet NOW and i jumped for it and it happened. Unfortunately i had another dinner engagment later so we had to cut our fun to two hours and planned to meet up later that evening. he did not show after all the gushing about how attracted he was to me and how my pics dont do me justice. He was on his way over supposedly after a phone call then never showed or emailed or called until i cornered him here and he apologized for chickening out. My fault i never got his phone number i never put boundaries in place for the first incidents of being inconsiderate. I also cannot read minds but i was hurt and no reason was really given. i guessed some things but as i said i
cannot as i said read minds. Now maybe i am too naive, but i got of the man business after a treacherous relationship and stayed away for 4 years and this is my reentry as to how men are or what? | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 4/30/2006 9:07:58 PM | I know a guy who met someone and she was not what she had represented herself to be (was about 150lb over average as stated on profile). He walked up to her and said your not average and I don't like liars. Then he left. I think giving an accurate portrayal of yourself with lots of pictures... all angles... and appropriate descriptions is crucial. If you plan on meeting someone they will find out regardless. I prefer the opinion to be that I am better in person, rather than them being disappointed. Sometimes the truth might not make you as popular, but a few successful dates are better than lots where your date ditches out. Just my opinion. | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 3:53:18 AM | I was about to do it once (several years ago, in a completely different setting). When I reached the house, the younger sister of my date told me it was her picture, and of course the real date was "under-represented" with some pounds, more exactly quite a bit. But I resisted the time necessary for the date to understand that it was not a good idea, and no chemistry could occur. Just had a mild conversation and played a console game with her (couch potato type) and then I said I had to leave.
I assume that some teenage kids do this for their mothers too. Not that it's to blame, but it's good to know beforehand. | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 4:28:28 AM | Which leads us to another possible topic: what to do when you feel your future date is significantly misrepresenting something about her/him?
I can come up with:
- being blunt and expressing your doubts
- getting around and keeping a low profile while waiting for the date to show up
- showing up as planned and saying you feel lied to
- showing up and sucking it up.
Sometimes you need to have such a strategy, otherwise it means to be plain stupid.
Just my two cents... | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 4:42:01 AM | Awwww...who was the idiot who stood you up King? You are SUCH a cutie...do you want I should fill my sock with nickels and beat her over the head for you? 
BIG HUGS FOR ALL THOSE WHO HAVE BEEN STOOD UP (me included!)
Aries | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 6:57:31 AM |
Which leads us to another possible topic: what to do when you feel your future date is significantly misrepresenting something about her/him?
I can come up with:
- being blunt and expressing your doubts
- getting around and keeping a low profile while waiting for the date to show up
- showing up as planned and saying you feel lied to
- showing up and sucking it up.
Well, I'd say "showing up and saying you feel lied to" would be the best option.
Frankly, it's unacceptable to misrepresent yourself and I really, really don't understand why people do this. It's dumb and a lot of times, unneccessary.
Case in point: I've had a few dates lie to me about their age and/or height. One guy went so far as to shave 10 years off of his age! When he started making comments in an IM about things he did when he was younger that didn't jibe with age I put two and two together.
The thing is: If he had been honest I would have went out with him regardless of his age. When I confronted him about it he said "women won't go out with me if they think I'm 46." I told him that I would have gone out with him because I thought he was interesting but because he has lied to me he had killed any chance of that happening.
It's the same with the guys that lied about their height. If you lie to me you can GUARANTEE there won't be a 2nd date (or even a first if I figure it out before the date occurs). I demand honesty; if someone will lie about something so trivial then what won't they lie about? No amount of chemistry or personality is going to overcome that. | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 9:22:07 AM | I have stood a lady up once but it was over and accident and I can tell you this It wasn't a pleasant site when I told her about the accident wound up at the hospital for over 9 hours javascript:smilie(' ')
javascript:smilie('') | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/1/2006 10:16:23 AM | Nipper, I dont understand why men or women choose a picture that either is 20yr, younger or not even themselve,s. In the end , exspecially when you go to meet them, they are not even close. They cant even say" Oh I took a bad picture", we all have them , but some where in even a bad picture, you can see something that looks like you. Mabey they think, exspecially when you,ve been talking a while, all is forgivin, but I wouldnt do it to someone. I had it done once to me, wont mention any names, but that wasnt even the problem. So, I dont know in that case if it was for the good or the other way around. Anyway, Looks aren,t everything, but they do get you a knock on your door. Just make sure it is the real you who answers. When they go to meet you, no matter he or she, a blind date isnt excately what either of you are exspecting, I know I wasnt. And it does go for both Women and Men, neither of us can say it doesnt, can we?  | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/2/2006 4:09:45 AM | | Not about this thread but about this thread. I was recommended by a friend to check out the forums but you people seem to have a secret society going where you only interact with yourselves. I am new and did not come here to interact with myself been doing that for 4 years now. I came here because i was hurting about a recent event that matched this thread and no one even responded to my post and now i think why even bother | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/2/2006 8:40:43 AM | ah, lilfish-there aint no 'secret society'
fact-there aint many secrets at all
in THIS place(hehe)
there wasnt really a 'question' in your post-so...
maybe perhaps folks just didnt realise you were wanting
a 'response' (so, dont go 'postal')
THAT was just a lil joke (one im SURE you're quite tired of-sorry)
ta 'break da ice' ya know?
as fer men/bein stood up/THIS being your 'welcom' back into
the 'world of dating'?
sorry for you that one was so RUDE
as to plan to meet up, NOT show
that IS the MINORITY-im sure
keep truckin pretty lady!
you did say that this 'gent' had already broken 'phone dates'
in the future, maybe adhere to ...
~the first time someone shows you who they are-BELIEVE them~
be thankful you didnt invest MONTHS on that cad,'chalk it up'
there ARE men whom will treat you with the RESPECT you DESERVE
WELCOME to zee FORUMS
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 5/2/2006 7:35:23 PM | Hey thanks for the reply. After reading your profile we seem to have a lot in common even though from different parts of the world. At least i like to think i'm from a different part of the world LOL. If you decide to start a revolution count me in.
Michelle | |
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| For the guys - why do you stand up women on dates?
Posted: 1/26/2008 4:34:55 PM | | Couldn't ever do that to someone as a means to make a point? I don't think mature reasonable adults do things like that.There are rules or courtesy that dictates how we as people behave toward one another.Some people can handle the freedom but not the responsibilty that comes with it. I don't think the reasons are any different for men or women.....They just don't have the "stones" to do the right thing! | |
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