| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/2/2007 9:28:02 AM | "Heaven for climate, Hell for company" - Samuel Clemens (AKA Mark Twain)
"In the battle of wits never fight an unarmed opponent." - Issac Asimov
"Madness takes its toll... Please have exact change." (soory I have no idea where this comes form originally)
"If anything can go wrong it will." - Murphy's Law
"Murphy was an optimist." - O'tools commentary on Murphy's Law
"I hear voices and they don't like you." - On a T shirt
"I'd do what the voices tell me but they don't speak my language" - On a T shirt
"Normal people scare me." - On a T shirt
"Since there are so few normal people in this world, if you are normal does that not by definition make you abnormal?" - Me
"There is no such thing as useless knowledge, though is application may not be immediately apparent." - Me
"That was a little bit like sand blasting a soup cracker." - Dogbert from the Dilbert comic strip by Scott Adams
"It's not nice to mess with mothers nature." - not sure where this one comes from originally
"You can lead a horticulture but you can't make her think" -Not sure where this comes form (If you don't get it try saying it out loud pronouncing each syllable in horticulture.)
"Time flies like an arrow, But fruit flies like a banana." - Not sure where this one originates either.
Maybe more later I have to get back to work.
Laen
Stampeder #3 | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/2/2007 4:10:26 PM | In the Dark, All Women Are Beautiful - Socrates
Beware of the man who has no enemies...
Dammit Jim ! Im a Doctor, not a philosopher!!
Cap'n!! She Canna Taek Much Morra this !!
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/2/2007 11:04:42 PM | "Of course men go for looks....
They see better then they think"
movie - Tammy and the millionaire | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/3/2007 5:59:12 AM | "A man is incomplete until he gets married....then he's finished!
~~Badhabits~~
Are you getting prettier or am I just lowering my standards!
~~Canadian Comedy Network~~ | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/3/2007 7:07:59 AM | | my profile is a compilation of most of my favorite quotes. not all are verbatim and some are more obvious than others. if you are so inclined see how many you can recognize. have fun. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/3/2007 8:34:03 AM | I am not hungry,
and
I am not homeless;
but I will work
for sex.
God Bless You!
-- on a T-Shirt | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 3/7/2007 9:15:53 PM | "I wanna find myself a girl who can show me what laughter means,
And we'll fill in the missing colours in each other's 'paint by number' dreams" - Jackson Brown, The Pretender
"There are three things I have learned never to discuss with people: religion, politics and the Great Pumpkin." - Linus Van Pelt
More to follow. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/27/2007 4:53:25 PM | Well, here is MY favorite quote
*The Toes You Step on Today is connected to the Ass you will be Kissing Tomorrow* and since I am on a roll .. here is an other one
*A Flower Always Smells Good Till a Dog Craps on It* LOL
Well, There are my quotes .. EnJoy | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/27/2007 5:41:04 PM | "Just because your tattoo has Chinese characters in it doesn't make you spiritual. It's right above the crack of your ass. And it translates to "beef with broccoli." The last time you did anything spiritual, you were praying to God you weren't pregnant. You're not spiritual. You're just high."
Bill Maher | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/27/2007 8:47:42 PM | You all have some great ones!!! I love quotes, collect them all the time - here are some of my favorites, some funny, some not so:
The opposite of love is not hate, it's indifference. The opposite of art is not ugliness, it's indifference. The opposite of faith is not heresy, it's indifference. And the opposite of life is not death, it's indifference. *Elie Wiesel
I know you understand what you think I said, but I'm not sure that you realize that what you heard is not what I meant. *Richard Nixon
I *do* know it all, I just can’t remember it all at once.
Be yourself – everyone else is already taken
When I was fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have him around. When I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. *Mark Twain
Hello. My name is Inigo Montoya. You killed my father. Prepare to die. *Inigo Montoya, The Princess Bride
"Sometimes our light goes out, but is blown again into instant flame by an encounter with another human being. Each of us owes the deepest thanks to those who have rekindled this inner light." *Albert Schweitzer
"There are some people who live in a dream world, and there are some who face reality; and then there are those who turn one into the other." *Douglas Everett
"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending." *Carl Bard
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.
An eye for an eye leaves the whole world blind.
The older I get, the better I used to be.
Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/27/2007 10:15:38 PM | One of my favourite quotes makes absolutely no sense and was said by someone whom has no fame or fortune... my grandfather (RIP).
"smile... it makes your teeth happy"
now who wouldn't want happy teeth? LOL can't argue with that logic! | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/29/2007 10:58:11 AM | "A healthy male adult bore consumes each year one and a half times his own weight in other people's patience."
- John Updike
"My one regret in life is that I am not someone else."
- Woody Allen
"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"
- Abraham Lincoln
I could go on for a while  | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/29/2007 1:58:37 PM | | Where are we going and why am I in this handbasket?? | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/30/2007 6:47:41 PM | "i promise. i will never die." - gary johnson, actor, team america (quite possibly the greatest movie line ever).
"you're far too trusting." - governor tarkin, star wars (the most polite way i have ever heard of anyone referred to as a "sucker!").
and since i saw a bill maher quote i'll raise it with two -
"Stop pretending your drugs are morally superior to my drugs, because you get yours at a store. This week, they released the autopsy report on Anna Nicole Smith, and the cause of death was what I always thought it was. Mad Cow. No, it turns out she had nine different prescription drugs in her. Which, in the medical field, is known as the 'Full Limbaugh.' They opened her up and a Walgreen's jumped out. Anti-depressants, anti-anxiety pills, sleeping pills, sedatives, Valium, methadone. This woman was killed by her doctor, who is a glorified bartender. And I'm not going to say his name, but only because, a) I don't want to get sued, and b) my back is killing me."
"But, 40% of the U.S. population has tried pot. That's 94 million Americans. Or, as I call them, 'my base.' Are we all criminals? No. We're not. But it is criminal when a certain person borrows and doesn't return another person's diamond-encrusted bong, Woody!" | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 4/30/2007 7:25:50 PM | | Fear not the enemy who slanders you, beware the friend who flatters you - General Oberon | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/4/2007 5:13:46 PM | Best Quote Of 2007?
By Chris Rock, comedian
2-28-07
"You know the world is going crazy when the best rapper is a white guy, the best golfer is a black guy,the tallest guy in the NBA is Chinese, the Swiss hold the America's Cup, France is accusing the U.S. of arrogance, Germany doesn't want to go to war, and the three most powerful men in America are named Bush, Dic* and Colon. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/4/2007 6:44:59 PM | I have a lot of favourite quotes.
"LIfe is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." George Carlin
"To be nobody but yourself in a world which is doing its best, night and day, to make you everybody else means to fight the hardest battle which any human being can fight; and never stop fighting. " e.e. cummings
"Courage doesn't always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, "I will try again tomorrow." Mary Anne Radmacher
"Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Some people move our souls to dance. They awaken us to new understanding with the passing whisper of their wisdom, and make the sky more beautiful to gaze upon. Some people stay in our lives awhile, leave footprints on our hearts and we are never ever the same." Unknown
"You can chase a butterfly all over the field and never catch it. But if you sit quietly in the grass it will come and sit on your shoulder." Unknown
Some of my favourite lines are from songs...
... and when you get the choice to sit it out or dance ... I hope you dance.
I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack
... Her hearts as soft as feathers, Still she weathers stormy skies. She's a sparrow when she's broken, but she's an eagle when she flies.
Eagle When She Flies by Dolly Parton
... It's the heart afraid of breaking that never learns to dance
It's the dream afraid of wakingthat never takes the chance
It's the one who won't be taken who cannot seem to give
and the soul afraid of dying that never learns to live
The Rose by Bette Midler | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/4/2007 8:53:14 PM | | " What good is being Irish, if the whole world doesn't make you cry" ~ John F. Kennedy | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/5/2007 12:21:04 AM | Sure I eat what I advertise.
Sure I eat Wheaties for breakfast.
A good bowl of Wheaties with bourbon can't be beat.
Dizzy Dean | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/5/2007 5:51:28 AM | | A lady say this to her child at Walmart one day after the kid fell down and started to cry."Come here and I'll pick you up" | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/5/2007 5:55:50 AM | | Lets see;panic, chaos, and confusion.My work here is done. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/17/2007 5:48:14 PM | Ok, these are more like Jokes than Quotes (and, what jokes they are) but, what the heck...
FIVE RULES FOR MEN TO FOLLOW FOR A HAPPY LIFE:
1. Get a woman who helps at home, cooks and cleans up.
2. Get a woman, who can make you smile and laugh.
3. Get a woman who you can trust and who does not lie to you.
4. Get a woman who is good in bed and who likes to be with you.
5. It is very important that these four women do not know each other. | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/18/2007 11:23:07 AM | "From a biologist's perspective, what is the meaning of life?"
"To reproduce ... then die" -- 9 Cheekweed Lane
The supreme irony of life is that no one gets out of it alive. — Robert A. Heinlein | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/29/2007 10:23:14 PM | | Younger Women, Older Whiskey, Faster Horses, More Money .... A Country Lyric | |
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| Favorite Quotes
Posted: 5/29/2007 10:31:30 PM | | "Certain death... Small chance of success.... What are we waiting for?" Gibli in the Rings Trilogy | |
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