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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/10/2008 6:51:23 AM | You think the parents of a caucasian man would accept an asian old lady to be part of their family? Just kidding, I dont think there should be a problem of interracial dating. Both my son married caucasian woman and their parents loves my sons and accepted them with out problem, and I am so proud of both my daugther-in-law. I am a grandma of a very good looking grandson. Luciloyu | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/10/2008 7:23:11 AM | I believe that there are subcultural differences that potentially cause friction in a relationship, but those differences are also potentially there when a Jewish person gets involved with a Protestant, or whatever. I think one of the biggest challenges to being in an interracial relationship is the prejudice inflicted upon the pair from people on the outside.
Prejudice isn't just Black versus White, though. If you held up an X-ray of any of us, would you be able to tell what complexion, nationality, or religion any of us are?
One telling moment in my life came when I was involved with a theater group. A very talented and lovely tall, dark-skinned actress had issues with a very talented and lovely light-skinned dancer in the cast. The dark-complexioned woman referred to the light-skinned woman as "Miss High-and-Might-High-Yellow, who thinks she is better than everyone else!"
There is a lot of hatred flowing through the veins of Society.
Is the person honorable? Employed? Does this person treat you well?
I have been fortunate to be exposed to a lot of different cultures. One of my good friends is an American citizen of Indian descent. He left for three months and came back with a bride with a dowrey from an arranged marriage. He sowed his oats, but didn't want an American Girl to settle down with.
I encountered a young White Hispanic woman that was involved with a Black man. She was young. She worked as a stripper, and his job was to drive the car that she paid for and shuttle her to and from work, and to beat her up if she didn't come home with enough money.
My point is that none of this has anything to do with who we are on the outside, and it is NOT about color, creed, or religion.
Any relationship is about who we are as individuals. | |
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| Re: How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/10/2008 10:54:10 AM | what the **** is all racism about the way i see it we are all the same colour inside we all look the same inside exept male n femail . i like girls of all races pakistani indian mixed race chinees so any girls out there wanna chat to me i dont care what colour or race they are i dont care about race ind i dont think any body should either if they do thats there problem no one elses ther just shallow so **** em | |
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| Re: How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/11/2008 11:08:13 AM | | I don't have a problem with it, as I am attracted to females of all different races and ethnicities. I don't think I could ever be the type to only date members of one specific race as some people do; I am more open to dating anyone of race regardless. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/12/2008 8:23:01 AM | This issue is complicated. The are many who've fallen for and/or married someone of a different race, which I think is great. Their bases were genuine. I am a black woman, so my perspective is going to be different. My good friend is white and her husband is black. They have a genuine connection and I can never feel indifferent to their union.
But then you have those aren't serious, or willing to deal with this issues behind dating interracial. They just want to have sex and play behind the scene.
I love black men, but they're being swiped up by white women more common now than ever. Many can say it's about attitude, but I am not a ball of attitude. In fact, my white friends have more attitude than I do. So, I definitely think there is more to it.
I am attracted to white men, but frankly white men love their white women. They will go Hispanic, Asian, etc..., but Black isn't common. So, it's a bit unfair.
I hate to sound like the one who got left behind, but some of us do feel that way. Hopefully I don't offend. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/12/2008 2:28:12 PM | ^You shouldn't feel like you got left behind because there are plenty of men to choose from still.
Many on here say that they are fine with interracial dating but I think for most it's in theory only. "It's 2008, we're all one race..." it sounds good but that's not the reality. People have their preferences and people have their prejudices. For those who are open to it, there is still often a hierarchy within the dating pool.
I see white women who are mostly attracted to black men, many times for sex and some times for love. Black men who are mostly attracted to white women, many times for status and some times for love. LOTS of white men who will date interracially but only asian women because they they are no longer satisfied with white american women. That leaves asian men and black women. Asian men who date out will always try to land a white woman because of the perceived class/status they offer. And now that black women seem to be left out I see so many of them trying to date white men now, claiming they aren't attracted to black men.
And for the asian woman above who is so happy her son married a white woman and had good looking kids, I know for a fact that had your son brought home a black woman as a wife you wouldn't be so down with interracial marriage. Many of my asian friends who are married to white men tell me that their parents would disown them if they married a black man. These people don't even know any black men, they just watch TV.
Such a tangled web, but that doesn't even include latinos, native americans and all of the other ethnicities here.
Race relations have come far but still have a LONG way to go. Just because someone is open to date interracially doesn't mean they would date you(r race). And just because a person would date you(r race) doesn't mean they would marry you. Some people are looking for experimentation, some want thrills, some honestly believe that mixed race kids are spawns of the devil.
If you say you have an open mind, then truly have an open mind and look at love as a factor for interracial relationships and not how it would benefit you. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/12/2008 2:38:53 PM |
You think the parents of a caucasian man would accept an asian old lady to be part of their family?
My parents are fine with it Luciloyu and so am I. Come on up here and get me | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/12/2008 5:35:04 PM |
Many on here say that they are fine with interracial dating but I think for most it's in theory only. "It's 2008, we're all one race..." it sounds good but that's not the reality. People have their preferences and people have their prejudices. For those who are open to it, there is still often a hierarchy within the dating pool.
I see white women who are mostly attracted to black men, many times for sex and some times for love. Black men who are mostly attracted to white women, many times for status and some times for love. LOTS of white men who will date interracially but only asian women because they they are no longer satisfied with white american women. That leaves asian men and black women. Asian men who date out will always try to land a white woman because of the perceived class/status they offer. And now that black women seem to be left out I see so many of them trying to date white men now, claiming they aren't attracted to black men.
Amber Rain. I admire your gusto for writing this! Like you said, people say they have no problem with interracial dating yet reality sings a different song. I think you outlined exactly what is going on and yes, it is all about PERCIEVED status and PERCIEVED culture. Is it right....hell no. Is it the reality...unfortunately yes. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/12/2008 6:44:17 PM | Race means little to me, if Im attracted to someone ,I'm attracted to them, I know that sounds cliche but I'm the type that thinks more along the lines that I would be rejected or not attractive to some to due to my race, if that makes sense. bed time  | |
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| Re: How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/17/2008 7:17:54 AM | | I tend to date out of my race. I think if a person wants to date someone of a different race they should go for it. You shouldn't see a person for their color. Go for what you feel is right. It usually is the parents or friends that don't agree with it but who cares. You are old enough to make your own decisions and if your happy with that person then ignore what others think. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/17/2008 8:33:21 AM | I truly feel it depends on the area you are. i just moved here from Norfolk, VA. I've dated many different races of women. My ex fiancee was black. It didn't work out because of problems on both our parts. But if you were to ever go to Norfolk you would see every combination of interracial dating. I'm not saying everyone in that area is open to the idea; however it is a much more open idea than it is here in the Atlanta area. I truly believe that America is a melting pot and sometime far distant in the future there won't be much difference in the looks of people here in the U.S. unless you area native of a foreign country.
I am truly open to the idea though. Love for me isn't restricted to your skin color. It's all the same when it comes to the heart of the matter(as I have in my profile). I've done a lot of travelling in my short life. I've traveled to 3 of the 4 corners of the globe and I've seen the same thing. Mostly what I've seen though is that mainly segregated dating occurs in the U.S. If you were to go to England or Spain or Egypt then it is nothing to see cultures and races mixing. In the middle east it's definitely a different story. They are without a doubt more strict about the dating scene. I've been to two places in Africa as well where I've seen many different mixes and people don't scoff at it in the least.
I've been on dates a few times since moving to Atlanta...two with black women and one with an Asian woman. I have gotten more frowns and stares from the local population than I had ever gotten living in Norfolk where I was always being seen with a person of a different race. Remember the 60's weren't really that long ago. And there are still many people alive that remember segregation and out and out racism and still carry those beliefs and teach their children the same foolish and ugly belief system.
I truly feel though that when those haters die out and their children get used to the idea and stop teaching their children to be racist and segregists(wrong spelling I know) then people will truly be more open to the idea.
I hold true to these beliefs because if I don't then I'll be just like all those that believe that you can date outside your race for fun but to marry outside your race or have children outside your race is wrong to do. I don't care what skin color my kids have. I want them to look like their mother and I. If that turns out to be an ugly kid......well their pops isn't exactly America's next top model so I'll take the hit on that. LOL.  | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/17/2008 9:33:58 AM | I have no problem at all with it. Two of my best friends have been in interracial relationships for years now. I don't see that someone's race, religion, etc has any effect on whether or not they are a good boyfriend or girlfriend.
Would I personally date inter racially? Probably not. To me it's an attraction thing and at 24, though I have lots of friends from various backgrounds I have never been attracted to someone racially different than myself. I'm always open to the possibility though. | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/17/2008 8:28:55 PM | I am sorry that you feel left behind, and while I date black men I am not specifically out to get them before a woman of color does. For me it isn't about me wanting to specifically find a black man, but if the black man wants to approach me I don't assume it's only because I'm white.
I have felt the brunt of the anger some black women have when they see me with a black man, but my take on it is that if the man didn't want to be with me they wouldn't be with me. I do not have the power to control another person's choice in who they want to ask out on a date, so for a woman of any color to be angry at me for dating a man outside of my ethnicity is all on them and truly has nothing to do with me. The anger is unattractive not the person themself.
As for white men not being all that open to dating black women I have to wonder if they're intimidated by their own attraction and are too worried what their friends may think. As a BBW it always seemed like white guys wanted the trophy girl on their arm to show off to their friends and it was always refreshing when a black man wasn't worried about the trophy look because they weren't afraid of the type of woman they are attracted to. It seems as though it is that self confidence that makes them more attractive to me.
Don't feel left behind because you are a black woman, there is someone out there that is deserving of you, believe that! | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:09:15 AM |
I can't believe somebody started a post such as this one. Ladies and gentlemen we live in the 21st century, and by now everyone should be ok with this subject. The one's who are not ok with it, are the one's considered as a minority. Racism is a thing of the past.
Actually, it isn't... You are right we live in the 21st-Century and, by now, everyone should be okay with it...but everyone isn't. And, contrary to your belief, those who aren't are not in the minority. Racism is hardly a thing of the past. Yes, it is getting better and, maybe even making progress in relative leaps and bounds but it is in no way a thing of the past. Neither is prejudice...not the same as racism but can be just as deadly in regard to what it can produce. Trust me, a black man who has lived through almost six decades, ten presidents, affirmative action, the civil rights movement, and the civil rights act. racism is alive and well. If it wasn't (openly or clandestinely) then we would not be having this discussion.
This thread, however, is not the place to have an open debate as to how large or small it still looms.
I'm done...PEACE
Rick | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/21/2008 11:38:41 AM | My previous response did not address the question at hand. I feel fine about interracial dating. I have been doing it since I turned eighteen. For those of you who don't count fast, that would be going on forty-one years. In that time I was married to a French-Canadian (Caucasian) woman for twenty of those years. Together we had a son, who also dates interracially. My ex only dated one person outside of her race and that was not why she married me nor was her being white the reason why I married her. at the time, we were a good match. For me, I guess you could say that the cultural thing was no big deal - we lived in Canada and, from my viewpoint, they seem to handle multi-culturalism a hellua lot easier that we Americans...you might even say that they embrace it. Again, that is how I saw it after living in Montreal for twenty-four years.
My screen name is testament to how I feel - if you want a translation, ask. For reinforcement, I think IR dating is fantastic. But, that said, I wouldn't recommend it for those who worry about what others will think. People get in your head without being invited they can't do that with your heart. And, it's all about the heart - it tells you what you need for the will to get you through when all else around you is trying to be the environmental force.
I'm done...PEACE
Rick | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/21/2008 2:36:38 PM |
I am attracted to white men, but frankly white men love their white women. They will go Hispanic, Asian, etc..., but Black isn't common. So, it's a bit unfair.
sorry ms_kysha that you feel this way cos it ain't true, trouble is I can't say more than sorry cos I'm already spoken for  I'm also non resident (albeit frequent visitor )  , too old and too ugly for any pic to be accepted even by POF.
Maybe white men look but daren't contact you cos you are, if I may say, young, tall, slim and very pretty ( hope my honey isn't reading this  ) . Us men will assume that you will only be interested in handsome hunky superstuds, and the fact you have the 'must have pic' on your profile reinforces this perception. also I can't see where it says that you are open to interracial dating. Sometimes we guys need a little clue. I know I grew up with the impression that black women were off limits to white men unless you were very brave - no doubt much of this attitude originated with racists keen to keep the different races apart. Thankfully now I know everything was a load of old bull and when people see my fiancee and I together in the street whether in nottingham or in washington we will be contributing to the continued social acceptance of mixed race couples. But in fairness to you, I accept that there might not be a whole load of men to choose from in Texas even before you weed out the ones with too much hair and too few grey cells. Prehaps you should go international - it obviously worked for someone else......
Forget the U.S presidential campaign, join the hug someone new today campaign.
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:07:11 PM | | I commented on this issue before, but my view is still the same! I think people should focus on what makes them happy, the color of someones skin shouldn't be a reason to disregard them! I think that there are more pressing matters to worry about than someones race! We all function pretty much the same! | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/21/2008 3:16:09 PM | It's not really an issue here in the UK, I'm happy to say, but then I always like the exotic option, same with food! (White English male speaking, BTW)
Dated various types of women with different national backgrounds and am dating someone from an Afro-Caribbean background tomorrow. Dated this type of woman twice before without it going anywhere but this one is quite into me and is staying over for a couple of nights. Never gone to bed with a black girl before and the fact that its somehow 'new' or 'different', not that she'll have 4 nipples or anything, is quite exciting and adding to the appeal, so I'm quite looking forward to it! | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 3:32:49 PM | | The best friend that I've made from POF - his ancestors came from India. He was the first non-white that I ever dated, but somehow we clicked. We both enjoy the simple things in life and in living in the moment and when we spend time together everything is so smooth and so easy. Our relationship has evolved into a really good friendship. (No romance but I'm really happy that he's my friend.) | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 3:40:26 PM |
I prefer a woman who is thoroughbred minded over a mut
i can't believe that people still say this kind of stuff and think they can get away with it, what a farking disgrace!
are the majority of white people in the US as racist as this, if so you ought to be ashamed.......
as to the question first raised: people are people I like you not because of the colour of your skin, or what country you were born, I like you because you are you. I have no discrimination in that regard. Sure, I might be ignorant to some beliefs and cultures and am most probably very westernised but I am willing to learn and am willing to listen. Bring it on............ | |
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| How do you feel about Interracial Dating ?
Posted: 6/22/2008 7:54:52 PM | To message 349... What an assinine thing to say! Are you for real?! Dude, Let me tell you..I raise "Thoroughbreds" and the best men I've known are the grooms and jockeys
of theses "Thoroughbreds", they happen to be black and date/marry alot of white chicks... these guys have more "Class" as do their partners, then you could likely have from learning how to spell the word.
That attitude makes me sooo ashamed to be an American, I moved to Canada 19 years ago. One of the things I DO NOT miss about the states is the ignorance that flows outta the mouths of many of "Ya all"
I grew up hearing and believing alot of it too, but I GREW UP, and formed my own opinion.
I see nothing wrong with interracial dating. I really can't stand the attitude/belief many have towards children produced of interracial love. It's almost funny too hear
the comments that "Mixed children aren't accepted by either race, because they're not fully white, or black" Do we not realize these beautiful children don't NEED to be accepted by one color or the other...they are their own race!!! The best of both backgrounds!! (I know race is not the correct term here...but you know what I mean..no?)
I married an Italian-Canadian, have 2 awesome children, they FULLY embrace the Italian heritage, fine with me..I can't offer them one particular nationality..I'm a mix of many European backgrounds.Aka..Heinz 57; Cosmopoliton.
I dated, for the first time, a super nice, funny as hell Jamacian about 8 years ago... he was the most considerate thoughtful man I'd ever known, he brought me the best soup for a few days, while I was sick..this was in the early days too. Every year we were together, he'd bring me a huge, beautiful bouqet of fresh flowers for Mothers day, my birthday, AND on the birthdays of my children. If I'd mentioned something I'd like, I always got it on the next holiday(Mothers day to Christmas!!) I got a hammock, a camcorder, dvd player,computer (I'm on now.lol) the list goes on & on, my point is he was by far the most giving man in my life, WAS being the opperative word here, cause I messed up and alot of things happened to push him away. And thru the years we were together I'd sometimes think "Oh my God, I'm in love with a black man??" I know my grandparents were rolling over in their graves..but oh well, and the rest of my family was more than ok with it, they saw how happy I was, and how incredible he treated me!! He's an honest man who loves horses, how we met, he rides them for a living, and loves golf , hockey,football, & basketball!! He also has an awesome network of good, true friends. Everyone who knows him loves him!!
So for me I'd never intended to, or even thought I would date outside my skin color, I'm honestly just not attracted to any... but he was about far more than the color of his skin.   | |
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