| Why do men use me??
Posted: 2/12/2009 12:50:47 PM | | First of all I wouldnt date a truker. they have girlfriends everywhere they travel to.Check that out secondly they are capable of transfering std from one woman to others I am only saying they are capable just like anybody else. Just be careful. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 2/12/2009 12:58:42 PM | | Well being a guy and understanding what your saying i guess the way to solve this problem is get rid of your computer simple the one thing that concerns me is that you stated that he is searching single sites but what are you doing on here ? regards Robbie and good luck | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 2/12/2009 11:25:50 PM | get rid of him geez, simple!
theres nothing wrong with being kind and generous, but draw the line somewhere!
much love and luck x | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 2/13/2009 12:13:05 PM | I have done the same thing... men like this are everywhere. I was with mine a yr before he dumped me.... yup he dumped me and had a new girl move in with him. It took him doing that to wake me up. ( I still think of him )
Sometimes men just suck. My advice run away now. | |
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| Change this to "why do women let men use them?"
Posted: 7/10/2009 1:48:01 PM | I have hijaked this. Please don't be upset with me.
Turn it around please. I have been divorced for many years now. Not out there desperately seeking Susan, so to speak, but more of an observer, and what I see are women who seem hell bent on destruction. They can be seen with their poorly dressed men, pushing a shopping cart and carrying three children at the same time, while the guy is just to busy to help because he is carrying his eighteen pack of beer.
When she needs to reach up for something, he stands and watches other women going by. If I make my way towards them, the conversation is all about him, and his language makes me want to cry. At checkout time, he is off towards the door, checking out women, while she unloads the groceries, controls the kids, pays the bill, and packs the bags. The woman seems to be drawn to this kind of man. Go watch in the parking lot. She unloads the groceries into the trunk of his big old SUV, while he sits inside playing the mp3s. The children take off running, as many kids are wont to do, and she has to chase them down and toss them into the SUV because he is oblivious.
I visit people like this sometimes as a casual friend, and leave shaking my head because he treats her like she is his slave, not his wife, or serious relationship. I know more women who are abused emotionally and physically than I can count, and I can never figure out why the woman sticks around.
Watch them in restaurants. A woman has worked to make herself attractive, and the guy is a slob who couldn't get his hair clean if he stood beneath Yellowstone Falls for a week. Does he order for her? When the waiter asks if they need anything, he answers, but doesn't ask her first. When its time to go, he gets up and just leaves, and she follows. I swear, if she didn't get up, he wouldn't even miss her till it was time for sex.
Gentleman open doors, hold chairs, stand up when the lady comes back to the table, and they work hard to make sure they share the load of raising the kids. Who these clowns are, I have on idea, but I am reminded of Mae West who said "his mother should have thrown him away, and kept the stork"
Early on in our marriage, my wife baby sat a few children each day to help make ends meet. When mom came to pick them up, she would be driving a broken down Maverick or a Pinto (remember those) and would tell the story of how 'he' had just bought a new boat. When 'he' would pick up the kids on that rare occasion, he was driving a brand new truck you needed a ladder to climb into. After all, he needed it to pull the boat, so the wife got the old ford that hardly ran, smoked all the way down the street, and I would just shake my head in disbelief.
I can't say I have felt great attraction to more than a few of these ladies, but I have felt tremendous empathy for them, all the while wondering how come I am standing there all alone in the world, and these women seem content to be nothing more than oxen for their boy friends.
I am no perfect man by any means. After all, I am divorced, so I must have more than a few flaws, but treating a lady like dirt and expecting her to like me, is not one of those flaws.
If this is the kind of man that women want to spend their lives with, I guess I can manage to live alone for the rest of mine.
Why do women stay with men who treat them like old carpet?
John | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 10:17:41 AM | | A woman cannot be a door mat unless she allows it....You've tolerated way too much.....Don't you think it's time you kick him out? I think that if you start working on your self esteem and realize that you are deserving of the best, you will not repeat the same mistake.....But, if this is a pattern with your relationships, I advise you get some therapy and get to the root of the problem...Good luck.... | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 10:26:24 AM | ok want to hear from a man?Tough your going to here it is july are you still with him?ok so if you are you need to look at yourself and see why your afraid of being alone yes sometimes it sucks but you will grow and become stronger this is a self esteem issue and you enable him to walk on you.do you have seperation anxiety? babygirl your a woman leave his ass by the side of the road real men dont act that way!!!Real men appreciate that a woman any woman will have anything to do with them at all and the adore and respect women...bob | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 10:33:18 AM | as one of the posters said, you let him do it.
Tell him if he doesn't stop doing that, he is out of the house, if he refuses or says he will stop, but still does it, kick him out. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 1:49:25 PM | | Dump him and dump him quick. I just dumped someone who was using me only for sex (and it wasn't even that good). I dumped him twice before and he asked me to stay that things would change, they never did. So I dumped him finally, do it you will feel 10 times better and once that door closes a new one opens. His loss!! | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 2:36:16 PM | a combination of 3" thick rose colored glasses , being a hopeless romantic and hoping to see the best in people.
This mix will see this user leave you when you have helped him to feel strong enough to go.
Know that you are empowering him... cut your losses and find someone new.
people will treat you exactly how you allow them to. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 2:48:28 PM | | he has no intreast in you simple as that so get rid of him as he will just carry on and him driveing lorrys then hes proberly arrangeing to meet in diffrent citys he wont change just move on with your life | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 5:57:03 PM | Where were you " trained " to be a maid/cook/ ? Did you go to "a special xchool " ? Or you override you basic common knowledge that you "just BEING USED " ! Having someone to take care of is common act... But it goes with the other half of the partnership to be treated fairly,caring,and honestly. Being a long-haul trucker/or a delivery trucker doesn't give him anymore rights than the next person. If you wish to keep on this posistion of being used,adbused,and left behind when he "finds a newer younger model of your talents", then be all means stay and wonder what is happening. I will "go out on a limb here " and tell you that a front in-his -face is due...not to what might be later on...but how it should . That speach is for you and him. I wouldn't be surprised that he has a few other ladies "right now " in his sights. There's a old joke of a lady talking to a judge about "divorce ". And how it was a religion reason! She said to the judge " He thought he was god" in his way of thinking...I truly beleived he wasn't when I shot him in the leg!
 | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 6:05:50 PM | | Hunny you are beautifull and you deserve better men that do that are ashamed to be seen in public with there woman in my belief if you really love him, do your self a favor and let him go, if he comes back and tells you he will change tell him to prove it, tell him to take you out and if he doesnt kick him to the curb you can do better. As for the dating website's he is a jerk to do that to you while you guys are together and especially i your house on your computer. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/11/2009 8:07:37 PM | | Girl, my only advise is to get out while you only have 5 MONTHS under your belt. I am 5 weeks out of a relationship that went on for 5 YEARS. I did everything for him, cooked , cleaned, lent him money ..which he never repaid/...was there for him when he was out of work, when no one else including his family would have anything to do with him...practically lived there the whole 5 yrs..even though I have my own house. Did everything to satisfy his EVERY NEED..He took me to Golden Corral ONCE!!!..Ive been gone 5 weeks and he's already taken dates to the best places in town, is at a concert tonight her and I heard the word marriage slip out. This after 5 weeks. If you find out what YOU did wrong let me know....but get out now before you waste years that could be spent with someone who will treat you right. I wish I had. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 4:01:35 PM | "I have always been very kind and generous. I have been seeing someone for 5 months now and besides hanging out with my friends or family he has never taken me out! I am helping build his own business, he stays at my apt., I cook and clean for him so he can work hard driving a truck"
Some guys don't know how good they have it...until they lose it...so move on if he doesn't appreciate you. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 4:51:59 PM | Liteinside,
Well yes there is plenty of advise out here but I'm sure you have heard most of it. My take on this is what are you' prepared to put up with? It seems to me maybe you just have a bad choice in men. The bottom line unfotunately without sounding harsh' is there are plenty of men, many on your side of the pond i would imagine who would give you what you need for free!! The choice is really yours, you are a responsible woman, who i again would imagine is quiet able to make hard decisions if needed.
Think on this then make the right one!
Hope this helps :-)
Steve (UK) | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 5:32:56 PM | | Its like what Dr. Phil says ..."You teach someone how to treat you". If he thinks he can get away with it he will do it. Change the locks and Pack his shit for him and send him on his way (dont wait for him to do it cause he won't). That is so bogus. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 8:10:33 PM | | why are you women attracted to those kind of men.decent men like us you wouldnt give the time of day to. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 8:15:50 PM | | why are you women attracted to those kind of men.decent men like us you wouldnt give the time of day to. you got what you asked for. good men ARE NOT SLICK TALKERS were stright forward . | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 7/12/2009 10:00:11 PM | because you pick this kind of man. he's not around much - but that's ok by you; he's in debt - that's also ok. you know you don't like it but thats ok too. what IS the attraction? and is it just him? I read your profile (all of it). sounds like your still trying to please your dad. dad trucked around a lot too. when he was around he taught you his passions- not how to find your own; how to make him happy - not what made his daughter happy. so you became the poster child of the "use-me-cause-i'm-not-using-me" clubhouse.. you're not alone. I'm still beating my brain to find out how to make dad see my side of the story. but its MY story now. I'm not saying go be a hermit or never invite a man home. but learn the difference between sex and love. learn the difference between your passions and his. if you don't see any difference, your missing something. answer the questions: who are you? what makes you laugh? cry? tingle? and moan? I know "good men" are boring.. and life is supposed to be interesting. but don't ask ANY man to sing your song and NEVER sing harmony just because some guy asked.
Flex | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 10/4/2009 2:18:52 AM | Maybe that's your problem, being kind and generous. Basically you are creating a path for some guys to use you as a doormat. If your gonna allow this to keep happening to you, then maybe its time your woman card got revoked.
Or on the other hand, you can grow a backbone and become a total b*tch. Your choice. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 10/4/2009 10:22:20 AM | The main reason I want a man is to have a companion for restaurants, concerts, travel, etc. I don't understand why you would have this guy around----- as an expensive, labor intensive housepet? Not understanding this at all......
And why are we giving advise to a woman who posted this over three years ago btw? | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 11/9/2009 6:36:25 AM | | Thanks Whenwillthiswork26, I did post this over 3 years ago. That guy is long gone. | |
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| Why do men use me??
Posted: 11/12/2009 4:15:18 PM | | If men use you, it is because you let them do so. Figure out why you do that. The odds are you have low self esteem, and figure you can't get anything but users. Believe otherwise, and then get someone better. | |
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