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 youknowtoomuch
Joined: 5/2/2006
Msg: 26
Men who like you to chase themPage 2 of 8    (1, 2, 3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8)

Yea but what about all those books in the bookstore/library that tell you things such as "if he doesnt call he's just not that into you". Or tell you to NEVER call a guy and ask him out he will be turned off as he's the one who wants to feel he's the initiator. Like with all these confusing messages, how is anyone supposed to know what to do?


which is percisely why you shoudl stop talking other people's morals as your own, and stop listning to media and "trends" god gave us all our own brain to think with.
 MikelnoAngelo
Joined: 2/3/2005
Msg: 27
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:39:34 PM

Nobody should "chase" anybody. If you feel like you have to chase someone, it's probably because they don't give you enough attention, which usually means they don't like you enough.

Which means that men should not "chase" women because the ladies doesn't like the man enough? Am I understanding this right? Then how is anyone going to meet?

I myself like to have the person let me know where I stand, with no games. Just let me know if I got a decent chance at being her guy. I can take it from there......
 HottieScotty
Joined: 6/9/2004
Msg: 28
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:44:26 PM
Dominika78..
Sorry girl.....but your statment's got me riled
This post is about fella's that want YOU to chase them....
And mean while..how many fella's have you got tagging along on " has you on thier faviroites list" .
What...150.....
No chasin going on there....
Shure your pretty....shure they all want you.....But don't you think YOUR the one asking to be chased....and why??

times are changing.....and men just ain't gonna wait in line for someone who thinks to much of themselves.
If they do......Shame on them for having no backbone.
This fella don't wait in line....
Eather you do......or you don't.

Boy....i'm feeling bitter tonight.
 unglaungla
Joined: 5/6/2006
Msg: 29
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:49:59 PM
MEN this is about power! We need to take control of this situation. We need to be able to make or break their day for a change. But it will only work if we all work together in lockstep. Stop asking women out. If only a few men do this, then it doesn't work, all men have to do this.

According to scientists men will die out in 100k years, so then they will only have plastic penises to use. What we need to do is start the REVOLUTION NOW! REVOLUTION! REVOLUTION! They have their dildos to wait us out, but now we have plastic pussies avalible as well, so I say buy some and hold out! Eventually they will either start asking us out and paying for our dinner or not, but we need to have a man's movement! AND I SAY NOW iS THE TIME! REVOLUTION!
 MistintedBrat
Joined: 4/25/2006
Msg: 30
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:53:09 PM
so, when you show interest in a guy and they say they are interested in you too, and I have been the one in one past scenario where I am the one initiating contact etc with the guy...he hardly ever does...so I'm believing he really isn't as interested as I am, but yet he says that I am wrong in believing that....so, what is it here guys?
 222
Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 31
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:54:57 PM
couldn't say it 2 much better girl . good 4 you!
 222
Joined: 4/29/2006
Msg: 32
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:57:18 PM
justinkredible knows her stuff
 snowman79
Joined: 4/16/2006
Msg: 33
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:58:34 PM
What's interesting about this is that men and women here are both saying the same things. In fact, both genders have argued for either side of the chase/don't chase argument.

Why should there be some blanket rule for pursuing the opposite sex? If the man or the woman indicates the intial interest, why does it matter? If someone likes chasing or being chased, fine; if they don't, that's fine too. Don't assume that one way will work in every situation.
 Lux_Interior
Joined: 12/18/2005
Msg: 34
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 9:59:43 PM
I pursue when I'm into a guy. If he doesn't pursue me right back, I lose interest real quick. I have no qualms about making the first move, but if I don't get reciprocation, I'm history. Obviously lack of reciprocation means disinterest... so there ya go.
 HottieScotty
Joined: 6/9/2004
Msg: 35
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:03:37 PM
And damn right some women should chase.
If their looking for the "pot of gold" relationship.....well.they better get off their pretty ass's....and bring somthing to the table .insted of what they think is god's gift to men.

We are the ones that are expected to pay for the $150 dinner....the $50 movie....
The $150 bar tab.....then the $35 cab ride....the $4000 hot tub..lake lot....camp trips with his and her quads.
Damn rights ....I'm worth the chase.
Why should i chase??
What's in it for me.....2 kids from different guys.....a huge credit card bill...and a girl with no money.
Hum..but boy..she shure looks pretty.
 MistintedBrat
Joined: 4/25/2006
Msg: 36
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:05:48 PM
That's exactly my point here lux, so, this is where we start NOT believing what guys say... guys,why say you are interested if you're really not! Why lie about it? Why say anything at all for that matter...leave it be then...this shouldn't be a game for either side, but this is where that ego boosting factor comes in play...simply lack of self confidence.
 Lux_Interior
Joined: 12/18/2005
Msg: 37
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:21:42 PM
But at least if they don't pursue, you get your answer.

As for Why lie? Well... it's a cop out, really. Cowardice. Honestly men (women, too), if you tell someone you're not into them and they flip out.. so what? How is this YOUR problem? They are the one's flipping out... let THEM be embarrassed. Y'all have nothin to be embarrassed about. Avoiding such a scene is why many lie. I understand the desire to not be part of a hissy-fit, but you (the dumper) aren't the one making the scene.
 unglaungla
Joined: 5/6/2006
Msg: 38
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:24:53 PM
"ego boosting factor comes in play...simply lack of self confidence"

same thing for women.

EVERY ARGUEMENT WOMEN MAKE CAN BE TURNED ON THEM. Remember that men.
 MistintedBrat
Joined: 4/25/2006
Msg: 39
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:41:44 PM
I agree unglaungla...women at fault here too, just wanted to hear the guys perspective on why they even say they are intested in a lady and not persue it equally....like I said previously..."this should not be a matter of a game or chase"...if you're interested then get it on whatever the intentions are if not then move on, don't lead on! And this goes for women too.
 morefunwithu
Joined: 7/27/2004
Msg: 40
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/8/2006 10:42:09 PM
Great thread topic!

I feel an initial contact should be made by either men or women. It never hurts to know that someone you had never met before found a reason to want to know more. Now if you are the Man doing the initial greeting, because of stereotypes long in place, it is usually seen by most people to be the way to go. If you are a woman making an initial contact, maybe you realize that you won't always find what you want if you wait for only those that will choose to contact you first. Or maybe you realize this is a large world and you are not likely to travel in the same circles as this man you like for whatever reason, so you just give him a hint that you have an inquiring mind and what to know more.

After that, it is up to the man or woman to let the contacter know, honestly whether or not you both should be traveling in the same direction...together. Be honest, polite and don't be afraid to say "no, I am not available" in whatever way you can politely say it. If they don't take no for an answer, then be firm and still polite. If they become an unwanted pest, then treat them as such. Kick them to the curb. Those types are out there on both sides of the gender line. Most people after knowing a couple of these pests, learn quickly what it takes to repell them away before they become psychotic.

It is not about gender types, it is about finding the right match for you to have the best time in your life. It all stems from honesty and not being afraid to ask and not being afraid to say no. No one likes rejection but if we are polite in our turn downs and honest with a little tact, we should not worry about who made the first contact. Stringing people along just for company or ego doesn't work on either side of the male and female pursuit. IF you don't see a future, even a short term future, go on to the next. I haven't seen anyone with a sign that says six billion served yet? LOL

Note: yes or no with tact politely is all it takes. As far as email goes, at least respond to their effort and say. I am not available at this time, thanks for asking!


---Robert
 Just Me:
Joined: 5/25/2005
Msg: 41
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:08:34 AM
I think if a guy is really into you...he'll chase you...no kidding, eh... But in the chasing game, women need not chase, if you do it will prolly be a waste of time. Let the guy come to you, if he doesn't then he never was that interested. But I imagine there has to be some positive reinforcement from the woman as well but need not necessarily have to initiate and continue the chasing game.
 twilight-twin
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 42
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:17:27 AM
I used to chase after who I wanted. This is fine if the feelings are pretty much mutual. In most my experiences though its a sure way to become nothing more than a bed buddy.
 snowman79
Joined: 4/16/2006
Msg: 43
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:18:41 AM

Let the guy come to you, if he doesn't then he never was that interested.


Bullcrap. There's a million reasons other than not being interested that a guy won't make the first move. They just don't happen to be GOOD reasons.
 twilight-twin
Joined: 11/19/2005
Msg: 44
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:23:47 AM

Whenever a woman shows too much interest, I get scared and run ...


See. . . this is what really happens when women chase men.
 unglaungla
Joined: 5/6/2006
Msg: 45
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:24:22 AM
"Let the guy come to you, if he doesn't then he never was that interested."

Let the woman come to you, if she doesn't then she never was that interested.


(my advice to the guys :))
 Just Me:
Joined: 5/25/2005
Msg: 46
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:48:36 AM
Whenever a woman shows too much interest, I get scared and run ...

Yes/No...or simply lose interest b/ there's no chase/challenge...honestly tho, if a guy is that interested he cannot not make a move. If he's waiting for a her to make a move...he could prolly take her or leave her. This is outside all those stunted moments when a guy can't make a move for whatever reason.
 ][KAOS][
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 47
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 12:56:22 AM
I won't ever "chase" anyone... I will pursue someone I am interested in to a certain level, but if the same interest is not shown back and it is becoming seemlingly one sided, I'm out.
 ][KAOS][
Joined: 2/24/2006
Msg: 48
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 1:12:57 AM
That's no Marlin, Marlin's aren't orange and penile shaped
 DEMI DISH
Joined: 1/15/2006
Msg: 49
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 4:09:17 AM
So I when I propose date with someone I've gotten close to already, they ignore you and don't call back.

So when I ignore them and tell them nicely "bye, bye" or "take care of yourself", as if it's over before it started, then all of sudden they're into you and don't want you out of the picture.

Chasing men or pursuing, whatever, I don't mind at all, in fact I like. WHAT I AM SAYING, IS THAT IT DOES NOT WORK EXCEPT FOR A ONE-NIGHT STAND.

That is my final point.
 topekabluez
Joined: 4/22/2006
Msg: 50
Men who like you to chase them
Posted: 5/9/2006 5:58:21 AM
You know, I've read this entire thread more than once (not to mention the other gazillion threads that mimic it) and one overriding aspect to all this is being overlooked: good old basic instinct.

It's encoded in us, to perform... whether that be to rise up and be a leader or to gain the attention of a potential mate. We preen, we signal, we do all those things that nature gave us without even thinking about it. And no matter what we do on a conscious level, it's our unconsious actions that either attract or repel others. All our actions at this level are for one undeniable purpose, to bring the strongest together. We cannot deny our baser instincts, no matter how much we wish to supress them. Eventually, they will rise to the top and we are powerless against them.

Our thinking brains develope reasoning for our actions, rationalizing why something attracts or repels us. Our interaction, the date, only serves to solidify or dispel what we already feel at our core about someone. We can talk ourselves out of being attracted, while at the same time talk ourselves into it when it wasn't initially there.

It's finding that balance between what we have control over, and what we don't, that allows us to have meaningful and supportive relationships. It's when we try to buck the system that we tend to screw things up.

Should women pursue men? They already do, only it's in their own way. Same for men. I think that if we look close enough, 2000 instinctual and unconsious things have happened before that first "hello" even takes place.


Bluez
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