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| | Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?Page 5 of 43 (3, 4, 5, 6, 7, 8, 9, 10, 11, 12, 13, 14, 15, 16, 17, 18, 19, 20, 21, 22, 23, 24, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 31, 32, 33, 34, 35, 36, 37, 38, 39, 40, 41, 42, 43) | Seeing as I haven't dated in 2 years, I'm probably not looking "just for sex".
Would I get married? Sure, if the right woman came along. Unfortunately my first POF date cured me of thinking that online dating was going to work, I got very tired of the incessant "sexual innuendo" (before the first date/meet even). Am I "looking for marriage"? nah, not really... I'm looking for love. If marriage comes after that, I'd be ok with it, but I'm not out to marry someone just for the sake of "getting married". | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/22/2006 6:30:52 PM | Ten years ago, I probably was more open to the idea of marriage, but I spent the time working on my career instead.
I can honestly say that anyone I know born in my generation, all of the guys who were married are now either divorced and financially destroyed or stuck in a loveless bitter marriage. Now I'm sure there are happily married people in the world, but I think they are the exception rather than the rule.
I realize that time is on my side here. As I get older, as long as I stay healthy and have my finances in order and no baggage, I can still get married. Yes some things will be more complicated with age, but its not so glaring in general for men. However I don't believe time is on the side of women at my age. Many I see in my day to day interactions already have kids, divorces and emotional wreckage from previous relationships.
Do men age better than women? I think thats kind of a generalization there. Some people just age better than others. But do I think that men tend to age better in the eyes of society and in the realm of dating compared to women? I think I can safely say yes, they do, as long as they have health and money. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/22/2006 6:31:16 PM | | singleguy64 has hit on what i think is the truth of the answer to the question. No one gets to our age and is single without having been throught the mill in some way, that's not the point. It seems to me, in general, women decide they want to get married and look for someone, men look for someone and then make the decision of whether they are someone who they want to marry. So yes men over 35 do want to get married but its only a relevant question to a man if there is someone to make the decision about. Wanting to get married just as a concept is fine but it is just a concept. I'd love to go back to the states to visit but since the only way i could do that at the minute is with a rowing boat i won't. It would end in disaster. Same way I'm not looking to seriously get married because i don't have a relationship were its worth considering. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/22/2006 7:46:01 PM | Good stuff people.. good stuff..
I think divorce has a way of sucking the life out of you .. so If a man or woman has been through a divorce.. they are not so quick to jump into signing the papers again .. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/22/2006 7:57:46 PM | | Yea stephen, very good point; some people I know have had the attitude, let's get together because I don't want to be alone. Don't think too many people really want to be alone, but to me, that's a poor reason to be with someone. I think some people are just in love with being in love. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/22/2006 11:08:22 PM | | i am looking for one woman. the right woman. she understands me; and i understand her. we are both looking to get married just once, and do so....Is this even possible these days? | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/23/2006 9:39:24 PM | no wonder so many bitter and wayword folks out there...
who in the heck wants to 'get married'?
Surely the intention is to bring into your life all the good things associated with being married - intimacy, love and acceptance, a partner in good and bad times...
Marriage doesn't create that or bring that into being - it's a consequence of those things, the result - not the input.
Me: 37 and bitter due to feeling as though i 'put in' with a woman unwilling to 'put in' what it takes to 'make it work'...
If it doesn't work - it's a business contract that is a bad deal for most men. The only contract that rewards one of the partners for breaking the deal.
Any men over 35 looking for a bad deal - when she leaves she takes at least HALF!
Which arm and leg do you wish to lose? oh,it's not your choice - it's the other half's...
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/23/2006 9:52:21 PM | I think alot of men over 35 have been to the show (marriage) at least once, and for some it turned out to be a horror show.
And maybe they are'nt interested in a sequel.
At least not right away | |
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rodher
| | Joined: 3/23/2006
Msg: 111 | |
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MagicA
| | Joined: 1/19/2006
Msg: 112 | |
| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/23/2006 11:14:36 PM | I was burned in a marriage but that was me and her.
I quite enjoyed being married and would certainly consider it again with the right person. I would be going in with my eyes a bit more "wide open" this time perhaps but sure, if I met the right person I'd be up for it.
Julian | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/24/2006 7:58:37 AM | It seems to me, in general, women decide they want to get married and look for someone, men look for someone and then make the decision of whether they are someone who they want to marry.
I've been there stephen. It was scary, to have a woman demanding that I marry her after 6-months of dating, and I wasnt even saying "no", I just wanted to talk about it because it meant me (I wouldn't even have asked her to move, because of the kids) moving 3 hours away, selling my house, quitting my job & finding one there, etc... Oh, wait, no.. there's no talk, marry her now or its over. uh, no then, I'm not marrying anyone if *my* feelings dont come into the picture... which really hurt, because I *did* love her - just she wouldn't listen to that - and why would I want to be in a one-sided marriage?? Marriage is a *mutual* decision, last I knew.
We actually talked about that last year, I said "you didn't want me, you wanted 'a husband' - anyone would do" (I said this as she was getting divorced from the guy she married a year after I said "no" - her comment "I love him so much, I want it to work" - his comment "its been over for at least 3 years as far as I'm concerned"). Interestingly, she agreed with me, she wasn't looking for love, she was looking for "a husband".
I'm not looking for "a wife". I'm looking for Love, the person who wants to be my partner in life, and where we'll be there for each other holding hands through the best of life and the worst...even at death. "Marriage" doesn't *need* to be in that picture, but if I found that person yes, I would marry her. Probably just a romantic pipe-dream eh?
But I'm not out there looking for "someone to marry". Thats just stupid.
Am I "seriously looking for love"? Yeah. Am I "seriously looking to get married"? No. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/24/2006 9:35:31 AM | "One question for you: Then why do I have so many female friends on online dating sites telling me a different story. Seems of the 8 of us... all met men that were looking for long term and yet all they wanted was "SEX". "
My view is this:
Yes they are, with the right woman. BUT being opportunistic and possibly (probably?) lonely they'll settle for sex with whatever woman they can find in the meantime.
There are larger variations in behaviour and desires on a individual basis within a sex than there are between sexes. In other words, not all men or women want the same thing. Every person is and individual when it comes to what they want and its your job to find out what that is if you wish to have something more long term than a date with them.
There are players who will say anything (lie) to get what they want without letting you know verbally what that is. They will cause you problems.
There are genuine, honest people who don't know or aren't really sure what they want. They lie to themselves (and others )when they're afraid of hurt feelings. They will also cause problems.
There are open, honest, upfront people who what you see is what you get and if thats what you want then thats what you need to be. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/24/2006 11:38:53 AM | I am absolutely a one woman man and if the one I'm looking for ever comes along I'd be happy for the rest of my life.
I'm definately not the "I'll say I love you and sleep with you and say I'm committed till something better comes along" type of guy.
If I was tall, dark and handsome I might be more inclined to play the field so to speak but I'm not and honestly I'm happy with who I am.
EDIT: Finished reading the rest of the posts after I made mine and wanted to add that I am looking for a friend, lover and partner not just a wife. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/24/2006 10:18:15 PM | I love this question.
I am 37 year old and have never been married. I have "long term" on my profile. I looking for a woman that will be my best friend, companion and lover. However, just because I am looking for my soulmate it does not mean I am not going to enjoy my life and date etc.
I feel I just have to be patient and wait until I meet the right person and we will live happily ever after.
Darcy  | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/25/2006 10:23:53 AM | Ok, I am a man (35). I'm not really sure why I am on here. Probably more for entertainment than anything else. However, I do know that I am NOT on here to find someone to sleep with (Don't need to be on here for that). As for "waiting for someone better to come along".. Hmmm? Nope. When I find someone to date, I put everything I have into that relationship. If I thought there was even someone better out there (while I was dating someone), than that would mean I lowered my standards to date the person I am currently with... Because I would only want to date the "best" person I could possibly find. So, the person I am with should be that person to begin with.
DOES THIS MAKE SENSE? | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 7/25/2006 12:36:33 PM | | I am hoping to find a spouse. I am not going to rush it, so I hope my potential dates don't get scared off by that post. haha But I have been around the dating block enough times to know that game and I am definately thinking about the future, not just a little short term fun. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 8/11/2006 7:05:28 AM |
"long term" relationships really means "try and sleep with you until
You sure they are 25? And they haven't had a relation with a woman yet? Serious emotional problem here. Might still be looking for mommy, or chance to cut the string. | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 8/11/2006 12:57:16 PM | | I want to be married too. If the right lady came along, I would marry her in a heart beat! I am about to be 38 in a few days... I'm not a player, I'm sincere, and I am seriously looking! | |
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opt
| | Joined: 7/15/2006
Msg: 123 | |
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| Any men over 35 seriously looking to get married?
Posted: 8/12/2006 8:48:27 PM | I would love to find that special someone to marry, but I am not going to marry just anyone. I want to marry the man who is right for me, and he feels that I am right for him.
It is important to point out that being married is something I strongly desire. The right man will support and encourage me through thick and thin. I am the kind of woman who will support and encourage my mate through good times and bad times. | |
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